


Hero

by Tabikat



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins, Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening
Genre: Alistair and Hue are hiimbo wardens, Anal Sex, During Canon, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Kinkquisition, M/M, Mostly Canon Compliant, No beta we die like mne, Oral Sex, Romance, Sex, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:38:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 26
Words: 133,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24980170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tabikat/pseuds/Tabikat
Summary: What is a Hero? If you go by stories it's some brave soul who is kind and selfless and strong and battles unimaginable evils to save everyone. The subject of tales and songs.And that's all Hue thought they were until he falls head over ass into trouble, becoming one of the two last Gray Wardens, and gathering armies for a war with darkness itself. Shit.(Dragon Age Origins and Awakening with a bunch of twists)
Relationships: Alistair (Dragon Age)/Original Female Character(s), Zevran Arainai/Male Mahariel, Zevran Arainai/Male Warden
Comments: 33
Kudos: 17





	1. Where the Green Goes

Green. It was the colour of his everchanging home, the shade of the trees that hid them well and the tint of their armor everyone wore. The grass that softened his steps, the aravels that sheltered them from one place to another. If asked, he'd probably say it was his favorite color as well. Until the seasons cooled, green was one of the true things he knew in his life. Green, his clan, and his best friend. A friend who had run off earlier in a sprint, leaving him behind in the grassy knoll they had been lazing on. When he had finally caught up, he found him staring down three humans off the end of his readied arrow. Humans who, until he appeared, had been bleating and begging for their life. When his arrow joined the other’s they had grown quiet in fear, eyes wide and watching for the moment their lives met an end.

“What do you say, Lethallan? What should we do with them?”, his friend’s brown eyes never left their prey as he addressed Hue, a smirk playing on his lips. It was a dangerous game; they could just kill them for wandering too close but then why they were here was much more interesting.

“What are you doing here shem?" The string of his bow drawing tighter as a warning to them. A silent promise of death should they attack or flee.

“Does it matter?”,Tamlen snapped before their captives could even breathe a word, “hunting or banditry, we’ll need to move camp if we let them live!” A fair point and he knew the other was right but there was something...distasteful about taking down unarmed foes. What little foe they were, their hands up and eyes on the verge of fearful tears. The thought of it left a sour note on his tongue.

“L-look...we didn’t come here to be trouble! We just found a cave…”

“Yes! A cave! With ruins like I’ve never seen!’, the second human spoke up, realizing they might have a bargaining chip here, “We thought there might be, uh…”

“Treasure?”, Tamlen scoffed, his eyes looking over the nervous humans with distaste, “so you’re more thieves than actual bandits.” They couldn’t deny his words but curiosity peaked in both elves, each giving the other a glance.

“I’d like to see that”, Hue wasn’t sure he wanted to believe these shem but on the other hand…

“So would I. I’ve never heard of ruins in these parts.”

“But I have proof!”, one of the braver humans stumbled closer, holding out an object, “we found this just inside the entrance.” Tamlen jerked it from his hands, looking it over this way and that as Hue kept his bow trained on the group. Excitement was now starting to bubble up in him.

“This stone has carvings…”, knitted eyebrows creased his forehead as he studied the stone, “is this Elvish? _Written_ Elvish?” Hue almost slacked his bow, his own eyes glancing over the stone before remembering he still had captives. If that was true then it truly was a treasure for his clan.

“There’s more in the ruins! We didn’t get very far in, though”, the human continued on but Hue’s mind was on something else now. Keeping the humans captive a far-off thought compared to exploring hidden ruins. Someplace new, untouched, with discoveries to be made and possibly danger to be had. The mere thought had his blood rushing in excitement and he could barely contain it.

“Why not?”, please say there was danger or a place they couldn’t scale, if only for his own adventurous needs.

“There was a demon!”, oh yes, “it was huge, with black eyes! Thank the maker we were able to out-run it!” It was probably a big black bear but this idiot shem would think those were demons. Still, that was definitely worth looking into.

“A demon”, his friend scoffed once more, not even trying to disguise his annoyance, “Where is this cave?”

“Just off the west, I think! There’s a cave in the rock face, and a huge hole just inside.”

“Do you trust them? Should we let them go?”, the humans suddenly looked hopeful, pleading as Tamlen turned to him. Why his friend let him be the decision maker made him curious but he decided to play along.

“I think they get it”, lowering his bow, he gave the humans a rather scary smile to drive his point in, “unless they wanna find out what happens if they _don’t._ ”

“N-no, we got it! We’re going, thank you!” Watching them stumble off into the woods like newborn fawn, Hue put his bow back on his back as Tamlen chuckled at the sight. He knew this would probably come back to bite them in some way but he wouldn’t shoot down unarmed people and Tamlen knew this. Maybe that’s why his friend made it his decision...that or so the Keeper would yell at him this time.

“Shall we see if there’s any truth to their story? These carvings make me curious”, Tamlen stood in front of Hue with a mischievous smile and he answered with one of his own, nodding at his friend.

“You read my mind!”

“Not that hard to do, Hue, you’re pretty simple”, he playfully swiped at his laughing friend as they both headed deeper into the woods.

Thankfully, the humans were right and both men walked into the big hole covered in vines and other dead fauna, marveling at the size and carvings along the way. Opening the creaking door at the end, the smell of age and rot hit Hue straight on. Ruins lay before them in a room being slowly consumed by vegetation and decay...and bones from past explorers who were not so lucky. Tamlen was too busy in awe of the structure itself but Hue felt...something in the air, smelled it’s presence soaking into the rocks around. They were alone but not and he had never felt himself as on-guard as he did now but what he was supposed to be on guard for?

Moving further into the ruins, through crumbling hallways, he could feel that chill grow deeper into his bones. His hands tensed as if ready to pull his bow on a moment’s notice but Tamlen only laughed at him.

“The Keeper is going to be so surprised when we report this to her!”

“Not before she scolds us.”

“Oh come on Hue, when has that ever stopped you?”, Tamlen laughed, turning to look at the smaller man, “hey, weren’t you supposed to be assisting Master Varathorn today? How did you end up coming with me?”

“The same way I always end up coming with you”, Hue grinned, feeling a bit better at his friend’s laughter, stepping into yet another room, “like I’d miss a chance to leave camp.”

“I’ve never met someone so eager to wander”, he grinned back, reaching out to ruffle the other’s hair but Hue dodged, “you’ll end up a flat-ear someday, living in cities like a shem!”

“Hah! I like hunting too much!”, Hue dodged the hair ruffle a second time, both men breaking into a sudden rough-housing session until they remembered where they were. Moving apart, they looked around the room again. Spying an old hunting trap laying in wait under some brush, Hue set to work disarming it as Tamlen traced his fingers along the stone.

“Why’d you wanna come down here?”, Hue broke the silence, finishing up the trap and tossing it to the side. These traps were old but not old enough to rust, someone didn’t want people wandering in here.

“Aren’t you curious? We could be discovering our history!”, his friend’s eyes twinkled with their future achievements and Hue couldn’t blame him, “Minstrels will write songs about us! What about you?”

“Thought I could fight a bear”, he shrugged.

“That’s so... _you_ ”, Tamlen scrunched up his nose and snorted, now imagining his tiny friend taking on a giant bear, “plus if I bring back some ancient discovery, the keeper might forgive me.”

“You get into trouble too much.”

“You’re one to talk Mr. I didn’t know it was a wolf trap and ate the bait!”

“That was one time!”, Hue squawked back, a blush visible on his cheeks and his friend laughed but it was almost...nervous, “what’s wrong?”

“I...wasn’t expecting this place to feel...quite like this”, Tamlen’s eyes searched the room, landing on some of the bones, grimacing at the sight, “can’t you feel that?” Ah, so even Tamlen could feel it, which means that this wasn’t a case of Hue’s instincts being heightened. As if some mysterious power could read their minds they heard shuffling nearby, both heads turning to see eight glowing eyes descend from the darkness. Long, hairy, spindling legs reached out and landed on the ground, a wretched gurgling sound sputtering from a fanged mouth. A giant spider seized upon them, causing both elves to quickly grab their bows in order to fight. There was no time to think as more spiders joined the fray, echoing a battle through the crumbling walls.

“Were those spiders?!”, Tamlen squeaked out, panting as he held onto the wall of the hallway they escaped to. Hue couldn’t answer him, catching his breath as he bent over, hands on his knees. Those were definitely spiders but he had never seen them as big as dogs in his life, never even heard of them! Leaning back up, he looked to the side to see an odd statue carved out of smooth stone, propped up along this wall as if to signal some importance.

“Uh, hey Tamlen…”, Tamlen pushed off from the wall, moving over to where the other was before his eyes widened. Suddenly the earlier fear was gone and replaced with sheer awe.

“I...I think this is suppose to be an Elven god but...it’s human carvings”, he blinked, confusion and excitement mixing on his face as he looked behind them, a giant door with more carvings along it’s surface beckoning to them, “if the Keeper wishes to come study this she’ll have to bring guards. This statue...I think it’s of an old god called the friend of the dead.”

“Wait, so this is a tomb?”, Hue looked around as if he was about to see dead bodies everywhere.

“An elven tomb built by the Shem?”, his sarcasm slipped out and he rolled his eyes when Hue shrugged, “he wasn’t an evil god like Fen’Harel so this doesn’t feel like...his. Hahren Paivel once said that in places where many people died, it can become Sethenran - a land of waking dreams. The Veil becomes weak and spirits slip into our world...and they possess corpses and walk around.” Hue chuckled when Tamlen shuddered at the thought, knowing the other was more fearful of strange things that crawl through the darkness. It was nice seeing his friend so passionate though. This happened a lot when they hunted together but Hue never grew tired of Tamlen’s stories and knowledge, even the trouble he got into. They always had each other’s backs.

“Come on Tamlen...walking dead?”, poking the other’s shoulder, he laughed as he walked backwards towards the door. Ignoring the feeling of wrongness, his curiosity had won out and he was sure Tamlen wanted to see what was beyond as well. However, what he had not expected was the clicking noise and a circular part of the floor sinking with his weight, carvings appearing along its surface. A green-like gas spilled out from the cracks, filling the area of the door quickly before Hue could scramble out. It was foul, left his throat and eyes burning but the groaning and creaking of bones was what startled him more. In the haze of the gas he could see bones float and slide to each other, forming the bodies of men, they slowly pushed up off the floor. 

Rotting skin stretched and clung to yellowed bones, forming a horrific visage of what was once a man. Battle-beaten armor hung from various places like aged tiles; cracked and veined in their rust. These creatures growled; a wet, gnashing sound that rattled through their bodies. Rusted out swords and bows were in their gruesome hands and they descended upon the men who once again found themselves fighting for their lives. Tamlen’s sword sunk through gnarled flesh and Hue’s arrows found their mark; the smell of rotten blood overpowering the now dwindling gas as they cut down these unnatural creatures. In reality, it didn’t last long at all but to the elves it had lasted more than they could bear, coughing up the last bit of that foul stench from their lungs.

“This place is haunted!”, Tamlen finally sputtered out, his eyes unsure as they looked towards the door. Every inch of him screamed they should leave, there was bound to be something more fearsome beyond that door but Hue made the answer for him, walking over and throwing it open. It seemed where Tamlen was afraid, his friend was fed up and wanted to find the source of all this madness.

“We gotta get rid of these things!”, Hue’s voice broke him out of his stupor, “what if they get out and attack the clan?” Ah, there it is. He knew Hue had to be almost as afraid as him but his friend was always so...reckless, brave but reckless. That unyielding loyalty to protect his friends and clan always had Hue ending up with injuries like no other but it was something so special that Tamlen couldn’t help but admire the smaller man for it. With a nod, he joined the other and walked into the next room.

“Well...you got your damn bear”, he panted, watching as Hue excitedly climbed on top of the now fallen bear in the middle of the room.

“Demon my ass!”, he cackled, looking rather triumphant as the other rolled his eyes, “though this isn’t like any bear I’ve seen. Pretty ugly…” Kicking the corpse, he noticed the bear had protrusions sticking out from it and it’s face was twisted, pieces rotting off. Maybe it had something to do with that gas. That thought had him reaching up to his own face, tracing along his cheeks. Ah good, still there. A glint of light caught their attention, pulling them from their thoughts and before them in the middle of the room stood a large, intricately carved mirror.

“Would you look at that”, Tamlen breathed out, awe written on his face as he stepped closer, “it’s beautiful, isn’t it? I wonder what the writing says…”

“Bet the Keeper could read it.”

“Maybe, but she’s not here. Odd that it isn’t broken, especially with that bear lumbering around in here”, he moved even closer, wary to touch but it was like that almost liquid sheen was calling to him, “wonder what...hey! Did you see that?” He flinched, a shadow rippling so quick it could be missed by a blink. Hue finally comes over, squinting as if it’d appear again on cue.

“What?”

“Something moved inside the mirror!” Both men stared into the dream-like glass when suddenly it moved once more. Rippling across the surface like a fish, a shadowed body flitted into their sight then out again. Tamlen moved forward, hand outstretched but Hue grabbed onto it, the hair on the back of his neck rising.

“Wait, Tamlen…”

“I’m just going to see what it is”, he shrugged the smaller elf off and stepped in closer, his hand once again reaching out to touch the glass. It rippled when his fingers touched, it was cold but didn’t feel like water or like anything he had ever touched before. It felt like touching haze, the sensation traveling up his fingers and into his hand. 

“Tamlen!” He could hear the encroaching fear in Hue’s voice but the mirror pulled him deeper, almost drowning out his friend.

“It’s...showing me places. I can see...some kind of city...underground?”, he kept studying, kept touching it as if possessed, trying to make the vision clearer, “and great...darkness. I can’t - it saw me! I can’t look away, help!” Fear cracked his voice and he tried to pull away but a force held him there, pulling at his body like thousands of invisible hands. The ripples turned turbulent, a storm cracking over its surface, pulsating and shaking as a bright light filled the room. Hue’s feet pushed from the ground, reaching out to his friend but in mere seconds an explosion hit the room, sending Hue backwards and across the floor. He didn’t even get a chance to realise what happened as darkness took him.

_“Can you hear me? I’m...very sorry.”_


	2. Tragedy begets Heros

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Grief is like the ocean; it comes in waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.” - Vicki Harrison

His breath stuttered as he woke with a start, gasping in fear, he tried to get his bearings. Wood...green...birds, the smell of fireside and tanning leather, elvish words. It filtered into his mind, settled on his tongue as he breathed it in and peace filled his bones. Finally, his vision cleared and he was staring up at the circling ceiling of an aravel. A breath of relief escaped his lips. The notion that it was just a dream, a nightmare, dispelled quickly when he sat up. Muscles in his body and head aching in strange ways, his blood felt foreign as it coursed through him. He felt...wrong, smelt wrong and that haunted voice echoed in the back of his mind. Answers wouldn’t find him here and with a wobbly step he walked out into the camp, shielding his eyes from the sun.

“You’re awake! You have the Gods’ own luck, Lethallen!”, another man rushed up to him, relief on his tongue as he looked Hue over, “how do you feel?”

“Feneral, how did I?”, his voice was rougher than usual, the dryness cracking his throat but thankfully the other read his mind.

“A shem brought you back two days ago. You don’t remember?” A shem? He vaguely remembers a blurry memory of a man and a voice. Wait, two days ago?! His head shoots up suddenly, making him grab it in pain. He barely heard Feneral say the man was a Gray Warden, other thoughts screaming to the forefront.

“Where’s Tamlen?!”, Hue interrupted, remembering what happened in that dark and haunted cave. The fear seeping into his bones only worsened when the other’s expression turned grim.

“Most of the hunters are looking for him now…”

“Then I will too!” A foot moved to walk but the world span, falling stopped by the other elf. His body felt so heavy…

“No, you - the keeper wanted to speak to you as soon as you woke”, he steadied Hue, feeling sorry for the smaller elf, “Stay here...I’ll get her.”

The Keeper had scolded him like he knew she would but he couldn’t make himself even listen, every second he stood around camp was another second Tamlen could be in danger. From what the Keeper said about him being sick, it was a sure chance that his friend was lying somewhere in that cave sick as well...surrounded by those things. She noticed the worry on his face and didn’t try to stop him from going back, though she did make him take Merrill with him just in case. Honestly, he was glad to have her with him, he knew if he had shot off on his own he would have damned the consequences and probably gotten himself killed looking for the other. How could he not though?! Tamlen was his best friend and he had to find him no matter what!  
  
Feneral had insisted on going to and Hue had no heart to stop him, he was also their friend. It was another who took a risk of getting sick but between Merrill and the Keeper, the odds were in their favour. At least, that was what he thought, he had a lot of faith in his clanmates. It was barely a few minutes on the trail when Hue smelt that rotting wrongness in the air once more, head shooting up as he spied much more formed corpses of archers shooting at them. The anger he felt outweighed his sick feeling and Hue shot them all down with the help of his friends.

“I’ve never seen anything like them! You can smell the evil on them”, Merrill spoke as calmly as she could but after seeing creatures that were nightmares come to life, he couldn’t blame her fear. It was as if the shadowed world had spit out a curse, tainting the land and calling forth monsters to drag them down. And the smell, evil was right, the putridness turned his stomach. This didn’t smell like death, more like disease and rot. Like the body of an animal that no other would feast on, festering on the ground, slick with slime and disease along rotted flesh. Maybe it was too much all at once because he felt like he was going to hurl.

“Are you alright”, her voice snapped him out of his daze, “were you hurt during the fight?”

“No, I’m fine”, it wasn’t a lie persay, he wasn’t hurt _during_ the fight.

“You do look pale now that Merrill’s mentioned it”, Feneral squints, looking closely at the smaller elf’s face but Hue just shakes his head. There was no time to worry about him, Tamlen was in danger!

  
  
  


He gave Merrill and Feneral a few seconds to stare at the ruins in awe, but his feet marched him straight in. Mind remembering the path him and Tamlen took, closer and closer into the heart of what he was now convinced was a tomb. It had to be, with this much death and curse permeating the air. Darkspawn was now their foe, appearing before them almost like magic and Hue’s rage grew as he took down one after the other. It hadn’t surprised him that they’d be there and the only thing going through his head was faster, go faster, find Tamlen! It was consuming him, a small fire in the pit of his stomach burning through the heaviness of his blood. Somehow he felt lighter, more sure, but he couldn’t sit and contemplate what was going on with his body when another wave of darkspawn fell to their weapons and magic.

“I can’t imagine Tamlen’s alive with those creatures about”, Merrill chattered on, looking over the carvings along the wall as they moved forward. She stepped back as Hue rounded on her, fire dancing in his eyes.

“Don’t say that, you don’t know!”, He snapped at her, a growl in his voice edged with irritation that the further they moved in there was still no sign of his friend. This was his fault, he should have stopped them from coming in the first place. He should have heeded his instincts, pulled Tamlen away, anything! No, instead he thought it would be _so_ much fun to explore, to fight a bear, to do any stupid thing instead of use his damn head! His feet carried him again, moving inward as he was followed closely by his friends who both looked worried for him.

  
  


The trap had been set again but Hue had been ready for it this time, setting it off and immediately shooting down one of the corpses. A calm anger guided his arrows, shooting them through the head and eyes with precision. At any other time he might be impressed with himself but the urgency jittered through his veins and once the last corpse fell, he slammed open the door. Instead of finding his lost friend however, he was greeted with the face of a familiar shem clad in armor. 

“So you were the one fighting darkspawn. I thought I heard combat”, Duncan moved closer, stepping over his own pile of bodies as he regarded Hue, “you’re the elf I found wandering the forest, aren’t you? I’m surprised you have recovered.” Indeed, Duncan actually looked rather impressed that Hue was standing in front of him at all but Hue couldn’t exactly say the same. Though now that he could see his saviour he could see the human was much older than him; black hair covering his head and face with stern eyes and a strong expression. His armor, flecked with darkspawn blood, was immaculately made and covered his tall form from neck to toes.

“If you heard fighting, why didn’t you help?” The words spat out before he could stop them but the older man just crossed his arms.

“I would have, had I not been battling myself. Not all the kills here are yours, you see.” He was right, Hue’s eyes graced over the room to see many more darkspawn bodies piled up. In the middle of the room was the once beautiful mirror, however the glass was clouded, hazy in an evil mist. It made him shudder and once again, his stomach churn for some reason.

“My name is Duncan, it’s a pleasure to finally meet you. The last time we spoke, you were barely conscious.”

“Hue…”, he at least gave the other his name, his eyes never leaving the room behind the other man.

“Andaran atish’an Duncan of the Gray Wardens. I am Merrill, the Keeper’s apprentice”, after Merrill’s introduction he had filtered out their talking, his sole focus on the room, scanning it to find his friend’s body or even a clue of his whereabouts. It was only when Tamlen’s name was brought up that he was back in the conversation.

“So you and your friend Tamlen both entered this cave? And you saw this mirror?”, Hue nodded.

“Tamlen touched the mirror...then there was an explosion, and I...blacked out”, recounting his memories, sure that was what happened and Duncan nodded on.

“I see...that’s unfortunate. The Gray Wardens have seen artifacts like these before; it is Tevinter in origin, used for communication. Over time some of them simply...break. They become filled with the same taint as darkspawn. Tamlen’s touch must've released it…”, his voice was calm as he explained this, watching the smaller elf’s face twist in realisation and grief. He knew from a look that this young man was blaming himself for his friend’s death, “it is what made you sick, and Tamlen too, I presume.”

“Can we fix it?”

“No, whoever gets near it now is sure to become sick.”

“I do not fear this sickness. The Keeper knows how to cure it”, Merrill finally spoke up, looking every bit as proud as Hue knew she could be. That’s right, the Keeper can cure them. They could find Tamlen and study the mirror, find out this whole cause and set everything right.

“She may have temporarily weakened it but she has not cured it. Look inside of yourself and you will know”, He paled, the weight of those words suffocating him as soon as they were said. He didn’t want to believe Duncan’s words but the churning in his blood told a different story. Whatever he had was eating him alive, like mud shifting through his veins and clogging up his skin, weighing him down now that anger had turned to anxiety. Tamlen must be feeling this as well…

He was snapped back to reality when he heard glass shatter, eyes capturing the moment the human’s sword flashed upon the glass. Shards and splinters flew into the air, glinting in captured light before falling lifelessly to the ground. A million whispering voices died out from the scattered pile, laying in front of their feet when silence took the room once more. Only their breathing filled the air, broken by the sheathing of a sword.

“Now, let’s speak to the Keeper about your cure.”

“What about Tamlen?”, his words forced from his dry throat, eyes pleading up at the human who only shook his head.

“There is nothing we can do…” No, he can’t believe this. He won’t believe it! There can’t be nothing, he survived and if he could survive, then Tamlen has to be around here somewhere! Stepping closer to Duncan, his eyes never left the human’s, as if by sheer willpower of his gaze there would be a different outcome.

“Is he dead?”

“There is  _ nothing _ you can do for him”, it wasn’t a yes or a no but Duncan’s firm tone and unyielding eyes told Hue he would not get the answer he so desperately sought, “He has been tainted for three days, unaided. Through your Keeper’s magic and your own willpower, you did not die. He had no chance, trust me when I say he is gone.”

“Then the body?” He knew he was grasping at straws but he had to. The hope of ever seeing his friend again, saving his friend, was dwindling along with his own survival. Despair was piling up in the back of his throat, threatening to choke him.

“Taken.” A silent, choked sob broke his lips but he would not cry, not in front of them all.

“Darkspawn took it? Not to eat...I hope”, Feneral looked disgusted, paling at the thought of what end their friend had truly met.

“They are evil creatures and I will leave it at that. We need to return”, Duncan’s voice was resolute and Hue’s shoulders sagged in defeat. What could he do or say? This human had more knowledge than they did and if Tamlen’s life had been forfeit to those creatures then...what path would he follow? Why had he also not succumbed to this fate, he had been caught up in the blast just like his friend. His only option now was to hear out this cure, maybe then he could come back and...well, he’ll figure it out. Following the group, he took one last look at the cave before moving on.

  
  
  


The funeral rite took more out of him than he had hoped and he slowly walked through camp, his head down. Though no one would blame him for crying he felt he couldn’t, it was too overwhelming. As if he was trekking through a twisted dream, any minute now the ground would open up and swallow him whole, waking him. That was wishful thinking. Whispering up at the familiar green of the trees, he would trade his life for Tamlen’s if he could but no Gods heard him. Instead the wind gently shifted the leaves above his head and the green grass under his feet but green gave him no comfort now and might not anymore.

“Da’len”, the Keeper’s voice carried over the wind and he looked up, realising he had unconsciously walked to her aravel.

“Your Keeper and I have spoken and we’ve come to an arrangement that concerns you”, Duncan spoke up next, “my order is in need of help, you’re in need of a cure. When I leave I hope you will join me. You’ll make an excellent Gray Warden.” The elf blinked, the words taking a moment to catch up to him. Surely he didn’t hear right or...he did but how could he?

“What?”, was all he could muster, looking from Duncan to the Keeper in confusion, “No, I can’t...Keeper?”

“We would not send you away but there is more here at stake”, She gave him a pitying look but that only chilled him to his bones. Suddenly a sorrowful fear was taking a hold of him; first losing Tamlen and then possibly his life, now he was being thrown from his home?

“You carry darkspawn taint, it’s remarkable you recovered as well as you did. But eventually, it will kill you, or  _ worse _ . The Gray Wardens can prevent this but you must join us.” He had always dreamed of exploring outside of his clan, past the shield of green to the cities and beyond. Tamlen and him would stay up, lying underneath the stars and talk about one day adventuring but they had known it always was a dream. To see it come true like this though, it was so bitter it made his stomach clench.

“Can I ever come back?”

“We don’t know”, the Keeper met Hue’s sad look with one of her own, “but we do not wish to see you suffer. The Gray Wardens offer you a way to survive.”

“I would not offer this if I did not think you had the makings of a Warden”, Duncan’s compliment should have elated him, made him feel honoured but his head was so muddled, “we need you and others like you.”

“It hurts my heart to send you away but we Dalish made a promise to aid the Wardens should a Blight come. The time is now and it will soon be upon us. We cannot escape this”, eyes widened at this information, taking it all in as best as he could but it was so much in one single day. It felt like the weight of his clan, the world itself, was sinking onto his shoulders and if he wasn’t so numb with it all, he was sure he’d be shaking.

“We offer you a chance to live and protect your clan.” Is it? Could he actually?

“It brings me sadness to send one of our sons away from the clan that loves him”, he didn’t want to leave, he was scared, “but if this is what the Creators intend for you, da’len, meet your destiny with your head held high. No matter where you go, you are Dalish. Never forget that.” He could feel the lump in his throat, his eyes burned with tears threatening to spill, heart pounding wildly. The dream never broke, the ground never swallowed him and he was still here, in this moment.

“I…”, don’t want to die, don’t want anyone to die, “I c...I’ll go.” Fear and sorrow threatened to swallow him yet the thought that he could protect his clan broke through, steadying his mind with resolve. Lifting his head, he vowed if he could survive this, then he would make sure the people he cared about would never meet the same fate as Tamlen.

“I’m proud of you Da’len”, the Keeper smiled sadly, placing a ring into his hand”, take this, it is your heritage. May it protect you from the darkness that will come.” His fist squeezed around it, holding it to his heart. With a breath, his head ducked down, finally letting the tears fall into the green below.

Head held high, he walked between the rows of his people; sadness and pride shown in equal measure on their faces. They know they lose one of their own; a son, a brother, a hunter and yet for a cause so great they feel pride in their hearts. A brave soul; reckless and impulsive as he was, he will always be one of theirs. Before he makes it to the end Merrill steps up, hugging him tightly as she tries not to cry. No longer will she be able to heal this wild boy’s wounds or hear his enthusiastic voice.

“Thank you”, was all he could say and it made her cry, tears wetting his armor when he hugged her back. Once released, he was brought into another hug by a woman, this time the one who had raised him when his parents had gone from this world. A long, shaky breath escaped him as he held her back tightly. Breaking the hug eventually, she smiled at him through tears.

“Your parents would be so proud Hue. Please, take this...it was your father’s. Your mother wished for me to give it to you when the time was right”, in his hands was now a necklace, old yet familiar, “may it be your parents’ eyes watching over you. I know I told you about what happened to them but know that you were born from their love; a love that made them defy the world around them. I only hope one day you can find one of your own like that.” His tears finally started up, hugging her once more. She may not have given birth to him but she was truly his mother in his mind and he would miss her dearly. 

With a longing part and tearful smile, he moved from her and clasped the hands of the Keeper who looked upon him with such pride that he couldn’t help but smile back. Nodding in acknowledgement, he moved to join Duncan up the incline, knowing he leaves part of his heart here. At just nineteen, he suddenly felt the weight of the world and the touch of death on his departing back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're through the Mahariel opening! For those reading so far, thank you, there's more to come! Next chapter is Ostagar and meeting Alistair which will be much more light-hearted. I hope everyone enjoys, let me know what you guys think!


	3. Introduction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”– C.S. Lewis

Hue had never been the silent type; it wasn’t like he was a chatter box or anything but he often spoke his mind or questioned the things around him. His clan usually gave in to him and seemed to find some amusement in his constant curiosity. Then again, he had never suffered mental blow after mental blow like this. The world had thought to throw a stream of tragedies at him and, if what Duncan spoke of was true, there was more to come. Considering all that, it really was no wonder he was quiet during the trip, speaking only when spoken to. He couldn’t even muster up much excitement when they had passed by farms; shem tending to crops and animals alike. 

Instead he listened, listened as Duncan spoke of their plans and destination. Explained about the Gray Wardens and what they did, some of their history. It was fascinating to learn but he also thought about how much Tamlen would enjoy hearing this and it hurt his heart. He wondered if one day it would hurt less when thoughts of his friend popped up but wasn’t certain of that ever happening. Green and brown soon turned into gray as they walked into the ruins of a fortress, Ostagar, a Tevinter made building tucked away in the Kocari Wilds. Even with sadness still filling his bones he couldn’t help the bubbling excitement rising up, his eyes wandering along the broken walls and foliage-covered pillars. 

It was massive! The stonework was like nothing he’d ever seen, not that he’d seen a lot in his life. Duncan at least gave him a few moments to look around, a warm smile as he watched the young man trace the ruin’s markings. The Keeper thought him too wild-tempered to go to the towns and villages for supplies but now he stands someplace much more extravagant! If only he could somehow show the others, especially Merrill, who would probably be more thrilled at this find than he himself.

“There are only a few Gray Wardens within Ferelden at the moment, but all of us are here”, Hue shook out of his trance and jogged to catch up, “This Blight must be stopped here and now. If it spreads north, Ferelden will fall.” So they will have to take on an army of darkness with just a few men, that seemed...rather impossible. He was about to voice that when another voice cut in, making them both stop.

“Ho there Duncan!”, a tall man with blonde hair, decked in gold...everything, walked to them, a smile on his face. Hue had never seen so much gold and colour on one person and his first thought was what an easy target that would be. On the other hand, the armor was massive and he did have a very large sword, confidence radiating off this man in waves. Yea, this human could probably take an arrow or two.

“King Cailan? I didn’t expect -”

“A royal welcome? I was beginning to worry you’d miss all the fun”, both men shook hands and it was then Hue realised he should keep that target comment to himself.

“Not if I could help it, your Majesty.”

“Then I’ll have the mighty Duncan at my side in battle after all! Glorious!”, his voice spilled pride, smile beaming in a very childlike manner,“The other Wardens told me you’d found a promising recruit. I take it this is he?” Hue straightened up, having to look up at this...excitable human smiling at him. Well, he didn’t smell bad at least and he _was_ friendly with Duncan. It was in his nature to be wary of any strange human, even if it was their King.

“Allow me to introduce you, your majesty.”

“There’s no need to be so formal, Duncan. We’ll be shedding blood together, after all!”, he laughed Duncan off and stared right at Hue, “Ho there, friend! Might I know your name?” The elf blinked, how the hell was he supposed to know how to address a king? Though the man did say they didn’t have to be formal, well, screw it.

“Yo there, I’m Hue!”, he raised a hand, trying to mimic the King’s greeting and gave a lopsided smile. Cailan paused, staring at the smaller man before a loud laugh busted from him. Duncan, however, was rubbing his temples.

“Pleased to meet you! The Wardens are desperate to bolster their numbers, and I, for one, am glad to help them. You are Dalish, are you not? I hear your people possess remarkable skill and honour.” At this Hue’s eyes actually light up a little; he’d only ever met humans who were afraid of them and calling them all sorts of dirty words. To think the King of these shem actually held respect for his people! He wished he could tell the Keeper that, wondering if she’d even believe him!

“Yes! We’re great hunters and I was the best tracker in my clan!”, Hue practically bounced on the ball of his feet, hands in excited fists as he spoke proudly, “Usually shem-uh, humans don’t like us but you know of us?” It seemed the earlier somber mood was now replaced and Duncan watched two children excitedly talk to each other; hopefully his new recruit would turn out to be a better listener than the King.

“Hah, I wish I knew more, but your people aren’t exactly fond of mine. For good reason”, Cailan’s own smile seemed to match Hue’s as he spoke, feeling more resolved, “I tell you this: You are very welcome here. The Gray Wardens will benefit greatly with you amongst them. I’m sorry to cut this short but I should return. Loghain waits eagerly to bore me with his strategies.” 

“Your Uncle sends his greetings and reminds you that Redcliffe forces could be here in less than a week”, Duncan chimed in, a serious look on his face.

“Ha! Eamon just wants in on the glory. We’ve won three battles against these monsters and tomorrow shall be no different!”

“Whoa”, Hue spoke before realising it, cocking his head at the King, “things are going that well?”

“I’m not even sure this is a true Blight. There are plenty of darkspawn on the field, but alas, we’ve seen no signs of an archdemon.”

“Disappointed, your majesty?” Hue looked over at Duncan, the tone of voice he used reminded him of when the Keeper was about to scold him. But, Duncan couldn’t scold a King...could he?

“I wanted a war like in the tales! A King riding with the fabled Gray Wardens against a tainted god! But I suppose this will have to do”, wait...the King wanted this?! He wanted a Blight so he could play hero? Sure Hue liked the challenges of fights, he’d take on a bear any day, but a bear didn’t spread death and disease to anything it touches! You can’t just shoot away the Blight! He lost Tamlen to this...he’s dying from this and who knows how many others might be too and the King wants it?! Suddenly he didn’t like this human anymore, scrunching up his nose as Cailan smiled at them. Both men watched him leave with his guards and when out of earshot, the growl that had been trapped in Hue’s throat released.

“Is he stupid?!”

“Hue!”, Duncan reprimanded him, watching the elf pout before he sighed, “What the King said is true, they’ve won several battles against the darkspawn here.”

“So?!”, the elf snapped again, his earlier sorrow coming back in full force as he began to pace, “fine, that’s great! But he wants this Duncan! If it wasn’t for this, wasn’t for me, Tamlen would be-!” His words failed him and he marched over, kicking this stupid shemlen stone structure like it was at fault. Duncan couldn’t help but watch him with pity, the boy had lost so much; his friend, his clan, and his life in one fell swoop. He, at least, understands Hue’s anger and lets the elf kick at the stone until he is satisfied. It’s at this moment though he realises his new recruit thinks more with his heart than with his head. Which might be a problem if he doesn’t address it now.

“I know it’s upsetting to hear it spoken like that”, he calmly reassures the boy who had come back over though refuses to look at Duncan, “and you are free to think what you wish but please do not speak your thoughts about the King out loud. We still need their help.”

“Fine.”

“Despite the victories, the darkspawn horde grows larger each day. By now, they outnumber us. I know this is an archdemon behind this. But I cannot ask the King to act solely on my feelings.”

“Why not? He just _looooves_ Gray Wardens”, Hue snarked then shut his mouth when Duncan gave him a look.

“We sent word to the Wardens in Orlais but it will be days before they join us”, Duncan continued, turning to look at Hue, “We must do what we can and look to Teryn Loghain to make up the difference. To that, we must proceed with your joining ritual without delay. Two more will join you, feel free to explore the camp as you wish. Seek out another Gray Warden by the name of Alistair when you are ready.”

“Got it”, Hue moved a little further before Duncan called out to him, causing him to look back.

“I know this has all been hard but I believe you will make a great Warden.”

The camp was...interesting. He had spoken to some of the guards and they had given up information about the King and Loghain rather easily...maybe too easily. Do people just open up to Wardens like that? Even he knew they were respected rather well but he never realised how much until he was literally smack dab in the middle of a shem camp and they greeted him...warmly! He had offered his services to the dog keeper around camp, promising to get a plant for a sick dog and why not? It made sense to him to help! The soldiers watched him wander about curiously but none had stopped him from doing anything until he almost wandered right into the Mage’s camp, stopped by two men in full armor. They had some sort of sword symbol and told him he wasn’t allowed...well, that’s fair.

“You’re quite curious aren’t you? You should be careful that doesn’t get you into trouble some day”, a woman’s voice called to him, looking up at an older human woman in robes.

“I mean...I’m here, aren’t I?” She laughed at that, she smelled nice, like herbs and cleanliness; almost like one would think a mother would smell. Her voice was even motherly as she spoke, reminding him a bit of Ashalle and he relaxed around her. Her name was Wynn and she was a mage from the Ferelden circle, who was requested here along with other mages by order of the King to help with the darkspawn. As she spoke, Hue noticed there was no fear or anxiety on her face, just a calm resolution.

“You’re Duncan’s newest recruit aren’t you?”, He nodded and she was silent for a moment, looking him over, “you look quite young...it’s a shame when youth must be thrown into battles.”

“I can take it”, he answered with his own resolve, smiling at her, “I promised to protect my clan.” With that they had no more to say, giving her a cheerful goodbye as he wandered further into the camp. Sadly not all the humans were good to him; he had to scold the Quartermaster for treating him like a slave and a priestess spat at him when he politely refused her blessings. Helping the prisoner out had given him mixed feelings and the...what was the word again, Tranquil, had been nice but it had stirred complicated feelings in the young elf. How could one be happy not feeling anything? That didn’t feel alive to him.

Daveth and Jory had been like night and day; Daveth spoke his mind in a carefree way. Jory was polite, honored to be here and spoke fondly of his wife and child on the way. Despite their different backgrounds they had both chosen to be there, to become Gray Wardens to help others and Hue respected them for it. With so much still to learn and see, he wandered up the stairs to an open room of pillars, poking his head in when he heard angry voices.

“What is it now? Haven’t the Gray Wardens asked more than enough of the Circle?” an older man in robes grounded out, clearly irritated at the younger man in armor across from him.

“I simply came to deliver a message from the revered mother, Ser Mage. She desires your presence”, the man, who after the process of elimination Hue assumed was Alistair, spoke up. He was tall and big compared to the elf; heavy armor...shield, sword. That same sword symbol thingy was emblazoned on the shield that he saw earlier as well. His hair was short and sort of reddish brown with stubble on his face and eyes that didn’t hide he wanted nothing to do with his conversation as well.

“What her Reverence “desires” is of no concern to me! I am busy helping the Gray Wardens - by the King’s orders, I might add!” The mage was growing angry, glaring at Alistair(?) with more hatred than was necessary.

“Should I have asked her to write a note?”, came a quick, snarky reply and Hue let out a snort, unable to hold that in. Damn, the mage glared at him then back at the man, ignoring him.

“Tell her I will not be harassed in this manner!”

“Yes, I was harassing you by delivering a message”, Alistair crossed his arms, a smirk playing on his lips.

“Your glibness does you no credit.”

“Here I thought we were getting along so well! I was even going to name one of my children after you... _the grumpy one._ ” That did it, Hue snorted again and this time they both looked over at him, though Alistair gave him a smile unlike the mage.

“Enough! I will speak with the woman myself!”, the mage huffed, shouldering Hue on the way, “out of my way, fool!” Glaring after the rude human, Hue opened his mouth to tell this mage where he can stick it but another voice cut him off.

“You know, one good thing about the Blight is how it brings people together”, the man stopped in front of Hue, voice dripping in honeyed sarcasm. Realization pulled Hue's smile wide, he was meant to play along.

“I know exactly what you mean”, Alistair seemed to like that response, smiling more naturally.

“It’s like a party! We could all stand in a circle and hold hands. That would give the darkspawn something to think about!”, He chuckled, amused by his own joke before realising he had no idea who this elf was, “Wait, we haven’t met, have we? I don’t suppose you happen to be another mage?”

“Would that make your day worse?”

“Hardly. I just like to know my chances of being turned into a toad at any given moment”, nose scrunched up at the thought before an idea hit him, “Wait, I do know you! You’re Duncan’s new recruit, the Dalish.”

“Hue.”

“That was the name!”

“And you must be Alistair”, Hue gave himself a mental pat on the back for being right when Alistair’s eyes went wide then chuckled.

“Did Duncan mention me? Nothing bad, I hope.”

“All bad things.”

“Damn, I was hoping you wouldn’t find out until you were stuck with me. Can’t exactly say “Sorry Duncan, I can’t work with him” in the middle of battle, you know.” His shoulder shrugged and Hue laughed, genuinely laughed. After all that happened he thought he’d never be able to make that sound again but this Alistair had managed it. The man was pretty funny though. Maybe he would be able to make a friend here after all, and with a shem of all things!

“Sooo…”

“Sooo, as the Junior member of the order, I’ll be accompanying you when you prepare for the Joining”, Alistair was studying him now, seriousness on his face, “Have you encountered Darkspawn before?” 

“Yea...a few.” The look on Hue’s face seemed distant and sad, filling Alistair with pity, “but...they can be killed.” The elf looked up on those words, eyes hardened with a resolve and a promise that Alistair wanted to ask about but decided now wasn’t the time to. Instead he just cleared his throat to break the tension…

“Duncan’s probably waiting for us -”

“Hey, what were you and the mage fighting about?” Hue’s question was so abrupt Alistair stuttered for a moment, blinking as he had to put his thoughts back on track.

“The circle is here at the King’s request and the Chantry doesn’t like that one bit. They just _love_ letting mages know how unwelcome they are.”

“That's kinda rude.”

“Yea and her Grace likes to use me to make it awkward since I used to be a templar.”

“Oh…”, Hue cocked his head, the little wheel in his mind turning, “...what’s a templar?” Again, Alistair paused, how easy this elf seemed to throw him off track.

“You don’t know?”, Hue shook his head, “Quick version, then. The Chantry tries to control the mages because they’re dangerous, so they keep Templars that are trained to hunt down and kill apostates.”

“You kill mages?!” His eyes went so wide with accusation that Alistair suddenly felt he had to defend himself.

“No! Apostates!”

“Prostates?”

“Apostates, what are y-?”

“What are Apostates?”

“You...they’re mages who escaped the circle”, Alistair sighed out.

“To be free?”

“Yes.”

“You kill mages who are just trying to be free?”

“That’s...well, yes, they’re dangerous.”

“Our mages are free and not dangerous, we don’t kill them. Why would you kill someone wanting to be free?” Hue squints, leaning into Alistair with a look that said if I don’t like your answer you might just suffer. He had just met this elf but he felt like Hue would make good on that promise.

“You know...putting it like that, yea, the order is probably screwed up”, he put his hands up in surrender to the elf, “but I don’t!”

“But you were a templar…”

“Not by choice!”, this time it was Alistair who snapped, causing the elf to back up and he blushed when he realised his outburst, “I left as soon as Duncan recruited me. Well, he had to conscript me because her Holiness didn’t want to let me go but I gladly left. I never was given a choice if I wanted to be a templar or not, I was given to the Chantry at a young age and made to train because I happen to be good at it.”

“Oh…”, Hue deflated, digging his foot into the ground, he stepped into something he shouldn’t have, “...sorry.”

“It’s fine, better to get it out in the open I say”, Alistair sighs, tone flighty, “makes us all such better friends at the end of the day.”

“Yea, that’s true!” the elf nodded like that made perfect sense, smiling up at the other who could only...stare in disbelief. Alistair wasn’t really sure what to make of him, this kind of directness throwing him off.

“We should get back to Duncan.”

“Yea, I look forward to traveling with you Alistair!” With a mock salute, he couldn't help but chuckle at Alistair’s squinting face.

“You do? Huh...that’s a switch” The elf laughed harder which in turn caused the man to smile. Hue had a good feeling about this one. They began to walk before he went around the other and walked backwards, playfully smiling up at the human.

"Hey Alistair…"

"Yea?"

"What's a circle?"

_"Oh sweet maker…"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really couldn't wait to showcase this chapter since it's the one where Alistair and Hue meet and sets the stage for their interactions. Which, honestly, is some of the more fun ones to write since they're two young men with similar senses of humor.


	4. Witch way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “And into the forest I go, to lose my mind and find my soul” ― John Muir

The state of being neither alive nor deceased; stale, unchanging, brown. Life and death traveled on the winds here, picked up by Hue’s nose as the group of four wandered further into the wilds. It was a little disorienting to say the least; usually one would smell the perfume of nearby foliage, the scents of the trees as they danced, and even the muddy banks. Here, it was as if the scents mixed in with their dead brethren, creating a familiar aroma that was somehow new to him. Of course, that didn’t stop him from exploring the moment they were there, picking up animal trails and curiously finding some new plants. 

In his distracted state he didn’t realize how he must have looked to the humans; their elf companion flitting from place to place, picking out plants and dirt and sniffing around. They even scolded him from trying to skin the wolves they killed, suggesting to leave them there! Keeper was right, the humans were a bit wasteful if they couldn’t be arsed to use their kills wisely. What if it got cold and they could use the furs? They could even sell them, get money for more equipment and supplies! What if someone got a stomach-ache and none of these humans thought to pick up herbs?! Well, guess that’s why he’s in the group now, he’ll just have to teach them such basic things.

Thoughts were interrupted when they heard a noise in the distance, moving closer to the source with weapons at the ready. Along the road was what appeared to be the carcass of a caravan, bodies littered along the ground with gruesome wounds. Figures that had once been animals and people had pieces ripped from them, bone showing through the holes of flesh. Blood hit his nose hard, soon those corpses would become food for the wilds...there was no saving them. Well, except one, a man was crawling towards them, dirt and blood caked into his skin and armor. Once he saw the group he let out a long breath, the muscles of his back relaxing when he realised these were no monsters but men.

“Who...is that? Gray...Wardens?” The dying man’s voice shook, breath labored from using what little strength he had left to address them.

“Well, he’s not half as dead as he looks, is he?”, Hue gave Alistair a side-look at that one, “What?”

“My scouting band was attacked by darkspawn”, kneeling down, he leveled his gaze so the man could continue, “They came out of the ground...please, help me! I’ve got to...return to camp…” Even crawling through the mud, pain racking his body, this man knew he had to return and fulfill his duty. 

“Okay”, Hue piped up, slapping his knees before standing up, “I’ll take him back then.”

“No, if...you just bandage me up, I...can get back myself” 

“I have bandages in my pack”, replacing Hue’s position, Alistair knelt down and pulled them out. It took the Warden no time at all to help patch the man up, wrapping with a knowledge that Hue can see he’s done this many times before. With a thanks, the scout stands on shaky feet but manages to start walking in the direction of the camp. He still thought it would be best if one of them took him back but he wasn’t going to argue.

“Did you hear? An entire patrol of seasoned men killed by darkspawn!” Jory spoke up, waving his hand over the destruction at their feet.

“Calm down Ser Jory, we’ll be fine if we’re careful.”

“Those soldiers were careful, and they were still overwhelmed! How many darkspawn can the four of us slay? A dozen? A hundred? There’s an entire army in these forests!”

“Are we keeping count cause I say I can take the most”, Jory didn’t seem to think that was funny as he looked at Hue’s chuckling form, the elf was showing no signs of being worried at all!

“There are darkspawn about, but we’re in no danger of walking into the bulk of the horde”, Alistair offered reassurance, though that seemed to do little to quell the other two humans.

“How do you know? I’m not a coward but this seems foolish and reckless. We should go back.”

“We’re far from helpless...besides, weren’t we supposed to be taking on darkspawn?” Hue raised his point, standing with his hands on his hips as he addressed the other man. Which was kind of funny from Alistair’s point of view seeing how much smaller the elf was compared to Jory. Seems he was packing a lot of courage in that body too.

“Know this: All Gray Wardens can sense darkspawn. Whatever their cunning, I guarantee they won’t take us by surprise. That’s why I’m here.” Speaking in a more calming tone, Alistair gave one last push for reassurance so they could continue forward. That’s all he needed was the group to come apart the first hour in the Wilds and having to explain that to Duncan.

“You see, ser knight? We might die but we’ll be warned about it first”, Daveth finally interjected and suddenly Alistair understood why Duncan would rub his temples at them...ah, he finally gets it. 

“Let’s get a move on…”, with a sigh he turned to gather them up only to realise...one was missing, “wait...where’s Hue?” Silent steps had carried the elf into the wilds while they were talking, leaving no trace that he was even here in the first place. Oh no...considering how much Hue ran about, Alistair could almost bet that he’d find himself in the thick of darkspawn in no time flat. Looking around the area, he prayed he would see the mop of blonde hair flitting about...Maker, please help him.

“You guys done?” Daveth screeched as Hue popped up in the middle of them again, startling the humans almost off balance. How in blazes…?!

“Hue! You can’t just - what are you holding?” Scolding halted on his lips, his eyes looked down at the scroll the elf had gripped in his hands. It was wet but still tied together, which means the writing might still be legible as well.

“Oh, this? Found it on that dead body in the water...also I found some interesting tracks leading that way. Do you think it could be darkspawn?” That look of pure, unadulterated curiosity across Hue’s face told Alistair one thing; this elf was going to get him into all sorts of trouble.

Despite complaints that he had been leading them in circles (he wasn’t, he knew exactly where he was going!), they managed to find the Gray Wardens’ ruins. It had taken them through several darkspawn hordes; big, hulking gruesome creatures with eyes as black as the pits of darkness they crawled from. His arrows found what vitals nightmares could even have, taking them down with a calm anger, the face of his friend looping in his mind. His friend that was torn from him by these bastards and even though he knew no amount of kills would bring Tamlen back, he took some pleasure in revenge.

Finishing up on his end, he looked over to see how well the humans handle themselves. After all, if they were supposed to watch each other’s backs then he had to know how they fought. Jory and Daveth could handle themselves, which made sense, he doubts Duncan would bring along someone who didn’t know the blade from a hilt; though there wasn’t anything...special about their techniques. A heavy, blunt sound had his eyes flitting over to the fourth member, watching his new friend taking out two darkspawn at once with a precision he’d never seen before. Eyes were hard with resolve through his helmet, expression lacking any fear as Alistair cut down the foes he had just thrown to the ground. Sword slashing through flesh, blood splattering to the ground, the gurgle from the creature's open throat signaled it’s death. It was graceful, deadly and Hue realised just how different a Templar’s training was to his Clan’s but also similar. Focus, breathe, face it, hit the vitals and end it quickly with as few moves as possible. 

They were both hunters…

Piercing screeches brought him back to the fight; arrow shot, it sailed through the air, finding its mark through the bottomless pit of an eye. Alistair quickly turned to see the enemy heap onto the ground, blood oozing around the arrow that had carried its doom.

“Thanks” A nod from Hue was all he needed before they descended on the rest of the group, taking care of them with a new found balance. Ground littered with bodies that the earth will eventually consume, swallowing them back into the great darkness from where they were born. Or one could only hope. He offered no prayer except the hope that whatever poor soul or spirit that was forced into this world may find some peace in the Beyond, ripping his arrows from collagulated flesh and wiping it on the grass. Breathing out, they all continued on to their destination, moving up the incline of shattered rock and mud, grassy patches breaking apart an old stoney path. Age and nature had taken a heavy toll on this building, any idea of what it once looked like lost to any eyes other than the spirits of the Wilds.

A torn up chest nestled in weeds caught his attention; splintered and broken from the years of weathered abuse that befell it. Without a word he stepped over, feeling the surface before opening the creaking lid to...nothing.

“Well, well, what do we have here”, his head jerked up, a woman’s voice carried over to them from the ruins and the rest of the group stood on edge, “Are you a vulture I wonder? A scavenger poking amidst a corpse whose bones were long since cleaned? Or merely an intruder, come into darkspawn-filled Wilds of mine to search for easy prey?” Hue cocked his head as he watched her descend weathered stairs, her tone and gaze even, no fear or malice...but rather amusement in her eyes. He hadn’t smelled or heard her at all! So how did she sneak up on them, he wondered...she didn’t seem to carry herself as a hunter.

Dark strands curled along pale skin, put up in some kind of hairdo that Hue didn’t know the name of. Her lips and eyes dark; painted smoke along the lids that brought out the bright gold that speckled her irises. She was lean, like him, though a few inches taller and her clothes were not like any he had seen on human or elf. Deep purple cloth hung from around her neck, plunging past her chest and barely covering her front. Black smallclothes peeked from within and a large, ornate golden necklace covered her collar bones; black feathers adorning the shoulders. Dark, tight material made up her trousers and gloves; boots to walk along the forest floor on her feet. His most immediate thought was she had no defense but maybe her defense was something he could not see...

“We were supposed to get something from this box”, he waved a hand over the broken chest, “we’re Gray Wardens.” Honesty seemed best here, she didn’t feel like an enemy and he had no desire to make her into one.

“You won’t find what you seek, the Wilds have already consumed this desecrated corpse”, she also regarded them curiously, moving to walk to the other side, “I have watched your progress for some time, “Where do they go?”, I wondered, “Why are they here?” And now you disturb ashes none have touched for so long. Why is that?”

“Don’t answer her!” Alistair cut in, the taller man glaring at the woman, clearly on edge by her presence.

“Why?”

“She looks Chasind, and that means others may be nearby”, he had at least thought of that much. However, no sounds or smells indicated more followed her so Hue relaxed unlike the other three. Ah right, they couldn’t tell could they?

“You fear barbarians will swoop down upon you?”, she chuckled, flinging her arms up in an exaggerated motion.

“Yes. Swooping is bad…”, Alistair answered slowly, not taking his eyes off her until he noticed the elf stepping closer, “Hue, don’t!”

“She’s a Witch of the Wilds, she is! She’ll turn us into toads!” Daveth spat out his accusations, stepping back in fear. He stopped on that, cocking his head curiously. Never met a witch before, this was turning out to be more interesting than he thought.

“Witch of the wilds? Such idle fancies, those legends. Have you no minds of your own?”, she crossed her arms, tone almost a sneer, “You there. Elves are not frightened little boys. Tell me your name and I shall tell you mine.”

“Oh, I’m Hue”, nodding his head in greeting, a grin appearing on his face, “Are you really a witch?”

“Do you believe I am?”

“I don’t know, I never met one before! You’re pretty though and you probably are strong since you’re not afraid of us.”, he answered easily, shrugging one shoulder as he stepped a bit closer, “but you’re curious because we’re on your land. I get it, we didn’t mean to trespass, we just needed to get this Gray Warden thing.” Head tilted into a small bow, he knew how it felt to have strangers venture too close to your home. Of course, she was probably sizing them up, seeing if they were a danger or not and what to do with them. Her eyes widened in surprise, contemplating him for a moment before her own smile broke out.

“Such manners”, soft voice trailed over, “You may call me Morrigan. Shall I guess your purpose? You sought something in that chest, something that is here no longer?”

“Here no longer?”, now Alistair had stepped in a bit, pointing his finger at her, “You stole them, didn’t you? You’re...some kind of...sneaky...witch-thief!”

“How very eloquent. How does one steal from dead men?”, she snapped back at him and he crossed his arms.

“Quite easily, it seems”, the Warden grounded out, “Those documents are Gray Warden property, and I suggest you return them.”

“I will not, for ‘twas not I who removed them. Invoke a name that means nothing here any longer if you wish; I am not threatened.”

“Alistair, hold on, let’s hear her out.” Hue finally stepped in, putting a hand on the bigger man’s chest to hold him back, red gazing at her, “do you know who removed them?”

“‘Twas my mother in fact.”

“Oh, good. Can you take us to see her?”, again she looked over Hue in surprise before smiling.

“Hmm, there is a sensible request”, her voice held a lilt of amusement, “I like you.”

“I’d be careful. First it’s, “I like you…” but then “ZAP!” Frog time.” Hue couldn’t help but laugh at the poor impression Alistair did of the woman’s voice. It bounced off the old stone, letting Alistair relax just a little before Daveth spoke up.

“She’ll put us all in the pot, she will! Just watch!”

“If the pot’s warmer than this forest, it’d be a nice change of pace”, Jory rolled his eyes, it seems he had settled down some when he realised they weren’t going to be attacked.

“Follow me then, if it pleases you.” Without any acknowledgement she turned from them, her bare back showing no caution as she moved into the woods. Hue followed without a thought, jogging to catch up to her before she disappeared in the trees.

“Hue!” Alistair groaned, were they really just going to follow an apostate...a witch into the deep woods?! His boots crushed the earth below in order to catch up, thinking on how the elf seemed to have no sense of danger. With a shrug the other two followed behind him, the trip into the heart of the Wilds a silent one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just keep putting quotes at the start because they're fun and also no need to ramble at the start of the chapter! The fun is in the reading. Sorry, this one is probably one of the shorter chapters because I felt if I moved into the meeting with Flemeth it would be a lot of unnecessary plot when Flemeth's major meeting was later anyway. More glimpses into Hue, he's kind of a rowdy boy. Hope everyone is enjoying reading this!


	5. Bottoms Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "What does not kill me makes me stronger" - Friedrich Nietzsche

Flemeth smelled of herbs and books and the Wilds itself, as if she was the soul...the spirit of this very land. She was wise, her voice gravely with experience and though her hair and clothes drooped with age, wrinkles lining her skin like history, something in his bones told him she was to be respected. Well, he would have anyway seeing as she had what they needed and so far neither her nor the younger woman had shown him hostility. Regal was how she presented herself, head held high with confidence and mystery as she brushed off the woman’s introduction of them.

She spoke what Hue could only hear as riddles, ominous in ways that he couldn’t understand. The things he did come to learn; she had kept the documents safe for their return, that he somehow played some big part in all this, and that the young woman, her daughter, was named Morrigan. There was quite a bit of back and forth between the two women, whether they were serious with each other or not he couldn’t grasp. It was a play that none of them had any lines in and so they could only become an audience to. Alistair chimed in every once in a while, of course only agitation and disbelief met him rather than answers. Only when the documents were secure in his hands did he breathe a little easier, still unsure how to take the old woman’s words. If he supposedly played a part in what was to come, what actor was he? Rather he felt just like another branch connected to a tree; useful but could be stripped away at any moment. 

Morrigan was commanded to lead them out of the woods, taking care of their guests “properly” as Flemeth called it. With a reluctant sigh the younger woman did so, walking ahead of them to lead them from the hazy landscape of swamp and bramble. Hue gave Flemeth one last look...a feeling in his gut telling him he’d be seeing her again; sooner if not later. A feeling that she seemed to know as a smirk spread across her face.

Camp was a sight for sore eyes, feeling the weight of mud and sweat cling to almost every surface of their bodies. What he wouldn’t give to be able to strip and just jump right in the river but that might be...a pretty bad idea right smack in the middle of darkspawn country. Instead he left the humans to their discussions with Duncan, telling the tales of the Witch and her daughter. Apostates, he heard Alistair call them; none of their business was Duncan’s reply. On that he agreed with Duncan, what Flemeth and Morrigan did within the Wilds was very much their own business. It was their land, carved and claimed for years, their home and Hue had no desire to disturb that. Freedom was something he cherished deep down...and from what he’s learned, templars do not. 

“Did you find that flower”, the dog-master questioned Hue when he was in sight and, ah, he had almost forgotten! Digging through his pouch he produced the white flower, handing it gently over to the human who smiled in relief.

“This is it! Now, I’ll mix this up into a medicine for the poor girl!” With a bit of help from Hue, the human was able to administer the herbal remedy and seemed to be doing much better within a few minutes. Her eyes focused on Hue’s, almost like she could see into his spirit and she barked a happy thanks. With not much else to do, he wandered the camp some more until food was served for them. Between all the excitement he hadn’t realised he was running on empty, grabbing a serving for himself and finding a place along the walls to sit upon. Any sort of manners was soon gone, replaced with only the singular thought of getting the food down as quickly as he could. Filling but lacking taste, definitely something to be served when one was in a hurry and only needed a full belly.

“Really? We survive hordes of darkspawn just for you to be done in by the stew?” His head snapped up, looking over to the voice nearby...Alistair, “Well, to be fair, this stuff is hard to swallow but at least try to stay alive a little longer, alright?” A snort rose from his chest as he spied the smirk playing on the human’s lips.

“Don’t plan on dying”, he said around a mouthful of potatoes before swallowing, “someone’s gotta keep you humans alive out in those woods.” His own smirk stretched across his face and Alistair playfully scoffed, nudging one of Hue’s hanging legs.

“I recall it was the elf in our party who ran amok out there.”

“And I still killed more darkspawn…”, he pointed his spoon at Alistair, laughing as the other’s brow creased.

“Now wait a minute...how do you know? No, that doesn’t count, next time we keep score and see who the real winner is.” That didn’t stop Hue’s laughter from getting louder, face rising towards the sky as it belted out. Infectious as it was, Alistair couldn’t help but join in as he made his way up the wall...stumbling a bit but managing to sit beside. Silence took over them as they ate...to Hue it was a peaceful sort, just basking in another’s company during meal. To Alistair though, it felt like a void needed to be filled and his mouth ran before his mind.

“How do you do that?” Hue cocked an eyebrow, waiting for the other to continue, “you know...that “you’re there and then you’re not” thing. Is it some kind of elf magic or are you secretly a spirit?”

“Yes and I’ve come to haunt you for all your misdeeds”, the elf's mouth formed into a wild grin, the light of the nearby torches making his reddish eyes glow almost ethereal.

“Well, you’ve sought the wrong person, I have never committed a misdeed in my life.”

“I’m sure you have…”

“Name one.” Hue balled his hand, moving it up and down with a wicked smile. Alistair’s face lit up faster than a lantern, sputtering as he tried to talk himself out of that one.

“Hah! Hah...well the joke is on you, I...the Chantry dissuaded us from such things and when would one find time between all the chanting and training and learning to go after others with extreme prejudice?”, Hue’s laughter rang out again and he pushed the elf's shoulder with small force, “Oh shut up. Like you haven’t at least thought about it.”

“Thought, acted, never turned as red as you though!” Though this was turning into something really fun he knew he should give the other a break lest other humans wandered over to see what the commotion was about, “I’m a hunter, I know how to hide my steps and move quickly. You have to if you plan on catching anything.”

“Makes sense but you do it too well…”

“How many people do you know who can do it?” Gaping like a fish, he had to think on that before giving Hue a once over, nodding his agreeance.

“Point taken.” Another question popped through his mouth, “how old are you?”

“19?” Eyes wide, he looked over the other in surprise...okay maybe he had thought him younger based on his, well, height and the way he acted. How was he supposed to know they were practically the same age?!

“So am I. Well, I'll be 20 soon.”

“What?” Hue looked as confused as Alistair had, blinking large eyes up at him, “I thought you were older! You’re so big!”

“No...you’re just small.” It took him a moment before he followed up, “and yes, I am...I’m very large.” Hue snorted with laughter, clearly taking it another way than Alistair was even suggesting and making him groan.

“So am I…” The elf could barely get the words out before laughter overtook him, the human sinking his face into his hands at this embarrassing but admittedly funny topic.

“Right, well. That was much more knowledge than I feel I should have been blessed with today”, he tried to look stern but the cracks of a smile played at the corners of his mouth, “Duncan will probably want us to start soon. I’ll gather up Jory and Daveth and meet you where we first met.” Taking his emptied bowl and spoon, he patted Hue on the shoulder before walking off towards the main part of camp. Watching the back of his new friend disappear into the tents, Hue realised he felt lighter than he had for a while now...the food had gone down easier too. In his heart of hearts it still hurt knowing that Tamlen was gone from this world but the thought of becoming a Gray Warden no longer worried at the edges of his mind...not with his new friend watching his back.

Agitated voices drifted down as he ascended the stairs, head cocking to catch some of what was being said. It seemed Jory did not approve of them still being put through tests while Daveth was just finding the other’s complaining a nuisance. Both were making solid cases for their side but were still arguing when Hue came to stand with them, eyes following Jory’s pacing form until he glanced over. Alistair, who’d usually say something about this time, was instead standing off to the side and watching them...but not really. He seemed distracted, quiet and he wanted to ask why but the other two were getting louder.

“Can you two stop?” His voice held a growl, annoyance pounding away at his temples, “it probably is a test; we’re gonna be fighting Darkspawn from now on so they’re probably making sure we’re ready.” In the back of his mind he wanted to scream at least you two aren’t dying with this being the only way to survive. He decided to keep that to himself however.

“I only know that my wife is in Highever with a child on the way”, Jory looked at him, “if they had warned me, I...it just doesn’t seem fair.”

“Would you have come if they warned you? Maybe that’s why they don’t...Wardens do what they must right?” Blinking he looked over to Daveth, the usual carefree expression was now stern, every word said with weight.

“Including sacrificing ourselves?”

“I’d sacrifice a lot more if I knew it would end the Blight.” Daveth was right, as much as he could understand Jory, in the end their personal happiness had to be sacrificed for the good of everyone. If his sacrifice...his becoming a Warden helps to keep his clan safe, he’d do it a thousand times. Blowing the loose hair over his one eye up, he gave them an annoyed look at least.

“Are you two done now?”

“Try not to wet your trousers before the ritual, ser Knight…” Daveth crossed his arms and Hue rolled his eyes, so much for their teamwork this afternoon. Again, his eyes flicked over to Alistair who hadn’t said one word at all...which he was starting to realise was very strange for the man.

“You alright?” Alistair jumped a bit, his pensive stare broken as he looked down towards the elf.

“Huh? Yes, just...yes”, the words were blurted out in a hurry, Hue didn’t quite believe them. However he had no chance to question when Duncan stepped into their circle.

“At last we come to the Joining”, all turned to face him as he walked through, standing near a stone pedestal with a goblet, “The Gray Wardens were founded during the first Blight when humanity stood on the verge of annihilation. So it was that the first Gray Wardens drank of Darkspawn blood and mastered their taint.” Wait, what, he looked upon Duncan with confusion. Wasn’t he dying because of the Darkspawn? So their blood was the cure or...is the cure a lie? Suddenly, it clicked, if the Wardens had to drink the blood... his eyes shot over to Alistair who had retreated back into his own thoughts.

“We’re going to drink the blood of those...those creatures?” Jory looked disgusted, fear alight on his face.

“As the first Gray Wardens did before us...as we did before you.” The elf’s brows scrunched up but he had gotten the gist of it, they were not asking anything of them that they themselves have not done. “This is the source of our power and our victory.”

“Those who survive the Joining become immune to the taint”, Alistair finally spoke up, “we can sense it in the Darkspawn and use it to slay the Archdemon.” And there it was...Duncan was right, it was his only cure to the venom eating through his veins. Flexing his hands, he stared at palms lit by the moon, as if he could see the darkness coursing through his skin like a crawling tattoo. That rushing, shifting feeling like water filtering through the sands of a bank, brimming over and pushing in places it shouldn’t be. A rushing tide of noise filled his head, his breathe an echoing drum to him yet silent to the ears of others in the evening hour. Then it all fell back to reality when he heard Duncan’s sharp tone call Daveth’s name. 

He watched as Daveth stepped up, shoulders back in confidence of a man who accepts the road fate has paved for him. It took Hue by surprise, realising that this human made his choice and faced it, eyes level to any danger that approaches. There was no what ifs or obligations, the choice had always been his and for a small moment Hue envied him for it. That was short-lived as he watched Daveth drink of the goblet, shaking the moment he handed it back to Duncan. With Hue it felt like the darkness was merely spilling over out of a bucket, too full to carry, heavy. Daveth’s body was a bucket being battered by an angry sea, convulsing to every wave that threatened to drag him under. Guttural sounds clawing their way from his throat and in mere, agonising seconds Hue watched as the life drained from him and he collapsed to the ground. Daveth was no more.

“I am so sorry Daveth”, Duncan’s sorrowful voice filled the still air but Hue couldn’t take his eyes off the lifeless body of a man he just met hours ago, “Jory, please step forward.”

“But...I have a wife. A child! Had I known…” Familiar singing of metal caught the elf’s attention. Eyes darted over to see Jory trembling, sword in hand, gaze fearful of Duncan slowly walking towards him.

“There is no turning back.”

“No. You ask too much! There is no glory in this!” Back met stone, panicked eyes never leaving the elder Warden as the sword was drawn down in a defensive stance. Seeing now that there was no choice, Duncan slowly drew his own. It happened in the blink of an eye, Jory charged the older man in fear and rage but Duncan easily batted his sword away, driving his own straight into the stomach. The sound of flesh being torn, wet muscle and blood ripped and gouged was accompanied by a rattling gasp. Life flying straight from the man’s lips, breath a silent fluttering of wings escaping into the night air. Body was laid down on the ground, lifeless now but bloody and twisted with fear instead of confidence. Brown turning dark, slick and shiny in the moonlight as blood puddled underneath the paling body. He could feel the metallic tange burning his nose.

“The Joining is not yet complete” Flicking blood from his blade, Duncan returned it to it’s home before picking up the goblet once more. Without missing a beat it was placed into Hue’s hands, eyes staring into the dark liquid swirling within. Dark, thick, iron in nature...he had known the smell of blood many times but tonight it makes him sick, phantom claws digging their way through his stomach.

“You are called upon to submit yourself to the taint for the greater good.” Duncan’s words almost didn’t feel spoken but rather a reverberating command through his brain. He knew exactly why he was here, there hadn’t been a choice. Had there ever been a choice for any of them? A slow death if he hadn’t followed Duncan, a fast, bloody one if he refuses to drink, or the Blight spilling through every inch of his veins and consuming him till he was a husk on the ground. If he survives this, he has a chance...but in his eyes it only seems what choice he has is in how he dies. If that’s the case then he will die by his own merit, facing this darkness head on and see who wins. 

Determination painted his face, goblet lifted up as he drank of the vile tasting liquid. It claws down his throat, through his chest and veins, and spreads as far as it can reach to each part of his skin. Agony a cascade of notes in the forms of gasps and groans breach his lips, he is dying...he is dead? He doesn’t know, vision blurred as the muted colours of the world blend together and he faintly feels himself fall to his knees. Pulse racing through his chest, neck, the tips of his fingers and his hands press into his head that throbs. Whispers echo loudly in his skull, words and noises he cannot understand but knows their feelings. A sky so green it seems sick, rotting as the blackened, mangled form of a beast roars. It rattles his brain, the mere vibration of this vision shaking him to his core and he barely realises he is laying on the ground until both men come into view over him for a brief minute. 

“You are now a Gray Warden. Welcome.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hue becomes a Gray Warden finally. Also I lengthened the time in Ostagar to give Hue and Alistair a chance to establish some sort of friendship before everything goes to hell, felt like it made sense that way.


	6. The Tower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Even in the grave, all is not lost.” - Edgar Allen Poe

It’s an hour or two before Alistair finds their new warden again. They had carried him to one of the tents to sleep off the Joining, the physical stress almost as bad as the mental. However, when he came to check up on him, the elf was nowhere to be found...blankets tossed to the side and weapons gone. A sinking feeling of losing the third one had him rushing out the tent and scouring the area. He really didn't want to deliver this news to the Senior Warden. _Hey Duncan, so seems we have NO recruits, why? Well, I do believe the third one just took a permanent vacation away from here._ The fear was short-lived when he saw the familiar puff of blonde hair...lone figure sitting rather still as if he’d find some answers in the dancing embers and ash of the campfire. Hue heard the footsteps from behind but didn’t bother to turn around...didn’t feel a need or want to face the other at this moment.

“There you are, thought you made a run for it.” Alistair’s head dropped as soon as he'd stopped talking, really great choice of words there. Solid.

“Would have just killed me like you did Jory.” There was no anger or spite in his tone, only resignation...as if those were merely facts of life and he had come to term with them. It didn’t feel right to hear such a desolate tone from the usually high-energy elf but Alistair supposes the situation was a heavy one. After all...Hue wasn’t entirely wrong so there wasn’t any way the human could dispute those words. 

“We lost one in my Joining as well, it was horrible. I doubt I will ever get used to it”, Hue looked sideways as Alistair sat next to him, voice whispering with somber tints, “I’m glad at least one of you made it through.” Brown met red as they looked at each other for a moment, Hue rolling this information around in his head. The Joining was secret because not many people would willingly give up their lives for a chance...yet Gray Wardens are needed to stop the Blight or else everyone dies. Even knowing that he knew, deep down, not many people would see the sacrifice as necessary. Death is scary...dying is scary, he joined in order to escape death and only went through with it because no matter his outcome there would always be death. It didn’t seem fair to anyone involved...but then he thinks of Daveth who was not dying and willingly drank from that cup, knowing his sacrifice meant the world. Of Alistair who also drank, a chance he might die but taking that plunge. 

This was making his head hurt.

“I don’t like thinking too much on this complicated stuff”, Hue finally spoke up, piecing together the thoughts he needed to say, “and I don’t think it’s fair but...I know Gray Wardens save people. They sacrifice so they can so I don’t think you guys are bad people. And now I can protect people too.” Blowing some strands of his hair from his face, he turns to glance at the other Warden. Alistair looked in thought but nodded, seeming to accept Hue’s decision.

“I’m glad you’re here to stay with us.”

“So you’re not the junior anymore? Or you’d be lonely?” Barely a beat passed before a smirk made its way onto the elf’s face, lightly punching the human in the arm.

“First off, ow. Second, OW. Why are you always aiming where it hurts?”

“You’re a really big target”, Alistair looked as if he was going to pout, mouth open to remind Hue who was in charge here but...the one who was in charge spoke up to them.

“Alistair. Hue. The King wishes to speak with us, come to the war table when you are able.” Duncan’s voice knocked their jovialness back in line, both men sitting straight up and replying with a “yes, sir”. Watching the older man walk off, Hue stood up to join Duncan before Alistair stopped him.

“Wait. Here…”, he held out a simple pendant; dirty gold with a reddish hue in the open glass and placed it in Hue’s hand, “ we take some of the blood and put it in a pendant. Something to remind us...of those who didn’t make it this far.” Gently he pulls out a similar one from inside his own armor and Hue's eyes widened before he nodded.

“ Gotcha.” Slipping it over his head, he buried it within his shirt, cold metal burning into skin with the reminder that his heart was beating. He was still alive.

Odd. That’s about all he could describe that meeting with the King and the man named Loghain. Supposedly they were family...King’s wife being his daughter or something, it didn’t really matter to him. What was odd was how much disdain the two had for each other and neither kept it a secret. Yet nobody said anything about it, ignoring it like it was a mild breeze tossing through their hair. In his clan things were settled if there were disputes, whether by the Keeper or by one of their laws. Everyone was family in a way and they all had to cooperate to survive, to keep the clan running, so petty squabbles disrupting the order were very much frowned upon.

So why did they have to suffer through this? Duncan and Alistair seemed quite used to ignoring it so Hue surmised this was definitely a human thing. Were humans always this petty? Well...okay, maybe not all the humans he met were but some of them had made it really far on the list. Thinking back to the meeting it was also odd that Hue and Alistair were even there; they were juniors and weren’t in any sort of decision-making position. This idea seemed to be shared with Loghain and despite the man’s rather unpleasant scowl, Hue couldn’t help but think he made some fair points. Normally you would not have the clan’s leader out in front, one wrong move and their death was too great of a loss. The Gray Wardens made more sense to fight the darkspawn head on, with the armies as support, but the King refused to listen, wanting to play hero with them.

_What an idiot._ Oh, they’re arguing again...this is boring.

“They are, your majesty.” Duncan’s voice knocked him out of his self-inflicted daze, noticing that both he and Alistair were being addressed now.

“And this is the recruit I met earlier on the road? I understand congratulations are in order.” Congratulations? Hue squints a little, mouth forming a thin line as he tries to digest those words. The King stood there, waiting for an answer with a stupid smile on his face and Hue almost considered telling him where he could stuff that congratulations until Duncan cleared his throat. _Fine._

“Not sure what for? I’m not special.” And he wasn’t, in his mind. True he managed to pass the Joining which apparently did make something special out of him but managing to stay alive when two others died didn’t seem like a skill to him. That was pure luck and luck, to him, didn’t make him special or feel favoured in any way.

“Oh, but you are. Every Gray Warden is needed now more than ever.” Cailin’s puffed up pride was quickly cut down by Loghain. Good thing too because neither man noticed Hue quietly mocking those words which caused a rather funny snort to come from Alistair’s throat.

“Your fascination with glory and legends will be your undoing, Cailin”, the old man didn’t even hide his annoyance, scolding the King right in his face, “We must attend to reality!” 

“Fine. Speak your strategy. The Gray Wardens and I draw the darkspawn into charging our lines and then…?”

“You will alert the tower to light the beacon, signaling my men to charge from cover.” Silver and Gold flinted in the candlelight surrounding the map as both men leaned in, metal fingers drawing paths along the lines and symbols. So...they were going to be on the front line, huh? Hue could use a dagger but he worked better with his bow, were there any high spots out in front? Some of the stone facings could be climbed and he’d have enough height for his shots, that way he could cover Duncan, Alistair, and the rest.

“Then we should send our best. Send Alistair and the new Gray Warden to make sure it’s done.” Wait...what? Blinking, he stared back over at the armored men. What were he and Alistair supposedly doing now? Lighting a tower?

“You mean we won’t be fighting in the battle?” His mouth moved on its own, brows creased as he realised exactly what this meant. Should have known...the bottom of the group is always made into errand boys.

“We need the beacon. Without it, Loghain’s men won’t know when to charge.” He really wanted to argue that lighting a stupid fire wasn’t what he signed himself up for but then remembered he didn’t exactly sign up in the first place. Oh, whatever. There’d be plenty more darkspawn to fight later he’s sure of it.

“You see? Glory for everyone!” Considering he didn’t want to become a pincushion he kept the thought of wiping that dumb smile off this human’s face to himself. Loghain started in on the King again...Duncan tried to intervene but was shot down by them both and oh look, more humans coming to the argue party. Why is it such a hard concept for them all to work together? Darkspawn or Archdemon, it won’t care who it kills only that it kills and they’re going to make it easier for them to kill if everyone is running around like agitated chickens. No wonder the other hunters always called humans a rightful mess, how do they even manage to get anything done with all this bickering?

“Enough!” Oh finally. “This plan will suffice. The Gray Wardens will light the beacon.” Loghain’s dark eyes met with Hue’s red, the elf staring back with no readable emotion. The old man took this as his cue to turn and leave.

“Thank you, Loghain. I cannot wait for that glorious moment! The Gray Wardens battle beside the King of Ferelden to stem the tide of evil!” Cailin’s head tilted up in pride, chest puffed out as much as one could in heavy armor. 

“Yes, Cailan. A glorious moment for us all.”

“You heard the plan. You and Alistair will go to the Tower of Ishal and ensure the beacon is lit.” Back at the bonfire Duncan reiterated the plan, pointing to both men to ensure they heard it well. These two as individuals tend to run on the reckless side but both together, alone, as a team. Duncan wasn’t sure what the outcome would be but he knew they’d at least follow his orders. Of course he expected them both to complain about it considering their personalities.

“So he needs two Gray Wardens standing up there holding the torch. Just in case, right?” There was no hiding the sarcasm in Alistair’s voice. He crossed his arms, cocking a brow in visible annoyance.

“Like he said, we’re better off being in battle! Not babysitting a torch!” 

“That is not your choice!” Hue's mouth snapped shut as Duncan’s voice grew firmer, “If King Cailan wishes Gray Wardens to ensure the beacon is lit, then Gray Wardens will be there. We must do whatever it takes to destroy the darkspawn...exciting or no.” Hue wanted to argue the fact that Cailan was no king of his and Gray Wardens should be fighting darkspawn, not falling in line to the whims of royalty. 

“I get it. I get it. Just so you know, if the king ever asks me to put on a dress and dance the Remigold, I’m drawing the line. Darkspawn or no.” Indignant reply forgotten, Hue snorted out a laugh at Alistair’s dry delivery. 

“ Dunno, that’d be a great distraction.”

“Me shimmying down the darkspawn line? Sure, we could kill them while they roll around laughing.” Duncan sighed as these two laughed at this ridiculous idea, letting them have a moment to get it out of their system.

“Who says they wouldn’t find you charming?” Hue’s laugh went louder as Alistair huffed out a mixture of disgust at the notion and laughter at how stupid it was.

“Do you think I’d look fetching enough?”

“Why not? Go for a red dress though.”

“Are you two quite done?” Both looked away from each other, like two children being scolded, trying to stifle the grins that refuse to leave their faces and Duncan just sighs once more. “The Tower is on the other side of the gorge from the King’s camp, the way we came when we arrived. We will signal you when the time is right. Alistair will know what to look for. Do not leave this task to join the battle, this is of the utmost importance and I am trusting you two.” With that last bit both men stood up a little straighter, their focus more serious. Seems they were willing to prove they were worthy of that trust.

“What if the Archdemon appears?”

“We soil our drawers, that’s what.” Alistair couldn’t help himself and both men almost fell into laughter again before Duncan's sharp look halted them.

“If it does, leave it to us. I want no heroics from either of you.”

“Never. Heroics is what the King does.” Rubbing his temples, he lets Hue have this one before continuing with his instructions. Alistair only raised an eyebrow on that, thinking to ask Hue later why he was so...aggressive in his speech towards the King. The elf certainly didn’t take that tone with either him or Duncan so maybe something was said...done? Nothing came to mind however.

“There will be plenty of battles for both of you later”, Duncan added on, crossing his arms, he looked over his two juniors, “I must join the others. From here, you two are on your own. Remember, you are both Gray Wardens. I expect you to be worthy of that title.” With a nod he walked down towards his troops, that nagging feeling he has felt for weeks never leaving him but they would be prepared...they had to be. Watching the older man leave, Hue looked from Duncan’s back to the skyline and to the silhouette of the tower they would soon be climbing.

“Well then…”, Alistair’s voice broke through his thoughts, “let’s get on our dancing shoes and go put on a show.” Patting the elf on the back, their grins grew once more as they began their preparations.

Sheer chaos were the only words Hue could think of to perfectly describe the scenes flitting past him. Alistair and him couldn’t stop, running across the bridge and dodging fallen soldiers and rocks smashing against the stone surface. Screams shattered through the sounds of explosions and rock, through the roar of the crowd below and fire engulfing the unlucky bodies of targets found. Adrenaline surged in his veins, letting him make it through the narrow run of the bridge and up into the courtyard where they met with some of Cailan’s men and...darkspawn. 

“Darkspawn have taken the tower!”

“How?!”, he could hear Alistair’s shout over the clanging of swords and the tearing of flesh, another creature fell to his blade. One of Hue's arrows sunk deep into the open throat of one charging at them, crumpling to the ground in a heap.

“They flooded in and took the lower chambers!”

“Then we have to get to the beacon and light it ourselves!” With a plan set in motion, they fought their way to the entrance of the tower, not stopping to look back even once. Each floor was filled with them, with traps that Hue disarmed in a blink of an eye and soon a path of red followed. At some point he couldn’t tell if the red was from human or darkspawn and really, he’d rather not think about it. The smell itself was a bit distracting but even more so was that the further they went up, the stronger it was instead of less. 

“We won? Yay, we won, haha..ow...ow, yay…”, Alistair piped up behind him as they slayed yet another room of creatures with their two nameless companions. His strained cheers were left unanswered, noticing the elf was far too focused on the large doors up the stairs, nose scrunched up in a worried look. “Hue?”

“Why are we fighting more the higher we go?” Eyes went wide with realization, the number of bodies indeed looked way too numerous for how much they’ve climbed.

“Maker’s breath...what are they doing here?”, sheathing his sword he walked up to his companion, stepping over a few shredded corpses in the process, “There wasn’t supposed to be any resistance here!”

"You could try telling them they’re in the wrong place.”

“Right. Because clearly this is all just a misunderstanding. We’ll laugh about this later.” An elbow on his arm made Hue turn, seeing the serious look on the other’s face, “At any rate, we need to hurry! We need to get up to the top of the tower and light the signal fire in time! Teyrn Loghain is waiting!” No disagreement there. Nodding, he makes his way up the stairs, throwing the doors open as they stumble into yet another battle. 

Even with his usual stamina Hue was definitely feeling the strain with each wave hitting them harder than the last. What was probably only minutes seemed like an eternity as body after body fell to either his arrows or Alistair’s sword. At least in the midst of this mess the two managed to create some sort of unspoken team work, flawlessly watching the other’s back. No praise or congratulations were to be had though, they had to keep pushing...up until the last door of the tower in which they wasted no time marching through.

Which, Hue would think later on, was probably the worst idea they had all night as they came face to face with a gigantic monster. Hearing their approach, it stopped it’s feast on whatever unlucky corpse it had killed and turned to face them. Horns gnarled and twisting reached to the heavens, skin a sickly gray as it stretched over muscles that seemed to want to burst forth. It’s face was cracked and rough like the bark of an old tree with pearl-colored eyes sunk deep in the sockets. However Hue noticed something far worse about this enormous monstrosity, the large mouth of jagged teeth as it’s roar shook them all to their core. What little armor it had on did nothing to make it less frightening...those teeth and claws more than made up for it.

Jumping back, Hue let loose a few arrows into its chest once it rushed them, grabbing the other warrior that stood beside Alistair in it's giant grip. They could only watch as the human was picked up like a doll, shaken in that clenching fist before another punched him repeatedly. Alistair charged with his sword, swiping at its back and legs but the skin was like rough leather. He wasn’t sure how much damage he was even doing, if he was at all. Throwing the poor swordsman to the side, body skidding across the floor in a lifeless lump, it turned its attention to Alistair who luckily enough managed to jump out of the way. The weariness that had settled in his bones had been replaced, now fear and rage were driving his body, reflexes heightened as he took every vital shot he could get. 

Between the arrows, sword, and magic, the beast started to falter. The perfect opportunity presenting itself when its massive body stumbled back, throwing its arms wide open. Hue took it, pulling out his dagger and running up its body to stab it right in the eye. Spit sprayed in his face as it roared, thrashing around with pain but he held on to whatever he could, stabbing into the other eye with a sickening squish. No longer did the beast thrash, instead he could hear the life drain from its throat and crash backwards to the floor. The impact threw him off, rolling him along the smooth stone as blood and spit smeared across his armor and skin. Alistair’s hand grabbed his arm, hoisting him up, panting breaths filling the now silent room before they suddenly remembered why they were even there.

“The beacon!” Both came to the same thought and rushed over, Alistair grabbing the nearby torch and throwing it into the fireplace. Instantly the fire grew and grew, spewing up the chute in a bright column before their very eyes. Thank the gods, they had made it...somehow and now Loghain’s army could move in to turn the tide. 

Their muscles only had mere moments to relax before the door burst open but instead of soldiers, darkspawn flooded into the room in a massive hoard. Arrows flew at them, catching them both off guard and he cried out in pain when one embedded itself into his shoulder. Fighting it, he shot off a few of his own but there were too many...too much stamina lost as his muscles felt like liquid at this point. Alistair’s body being thrown across the room distracted him, another arrow sinking into his flesh. Struggle as he might, he ended up on his back, vision blurring, his companion's name a cracked whisper on his lips. Hand reaching out, fingers shakingly clawing at the cool stone. The unholy cacophony of growls and metal sliding against metal drummed through his brain, threatening to swallow him whole. A roar vibrated through his very being...another monster? He was fading too fast to even know, only one thought screaming in his mind through all the noise.

_Creators, please don’t let another friend die._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally out of Ostagar, when I said this story was gonna be a slow burn I really meant it, haha! Don't worry, I wanted to establish a lot of these friend/companion relationships before the main charmer comes in. Holds true to the game anyway.
> 
> Are the quotes fun? Should I stop with them?


	7. Motivation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds that you plant." – Robert Louis Stevenson

Sensations began to pool through his body as darkness was blinked from his eyes. The world fuzzy at first; sounds and smells much more pleasant than he was expecting for lying on the floor of a blood-soaked tower. Wait...feeling around with his hand he noticed that the floor beneath him was much too soft for stone. In fact, this felt suspiciously like a bed and now that his eyes cleared up, that suspiciously looked like a wooden ceiling. He was also made aware that he was suspiciously down to his small clothes and bolted into a sitting position, expecting to feel pain but none was to be had. Confusion creased his brow...no, he had definitely been shot a couple of times, right after that ogre used them as punching bags. So he was dead then? He didn’t feel dead…

“Ah, your eyes finally open. Mother shall be pleased.” Blinking, he focused his returning sight to the woman coming towards his bedside...voice familiar then realisation dawned on him. Oh! It’s the witch from the woods...the one whose mother had given them the documents. This made no sense though; how did he get from the tower all the way into the wilds? Was he found? Moved? Was he never there to begin with? If the sudden sensations finally coming back to him didn’t give him a headache, he was sure all this complicated mess would.

“I remember you…”, he cleared his throat, voice husky from how dry it was, “you’re the woman from the Wilds. Morrigan, right?” 

“Yes. And we are in the Wilds, where I am bandaging your wounds.”, the crease in his brow grew, “you are welcome, by the way.”

“Ah, yea, thank you.” Rubbing the shoulder that he knew had an arrow in it until recently only caused his confusion to grow. No scar, no wound, it was like it was never there to begin with. Morrigan, at least, spared him from stewing in his own thoughts.

“How does your memory fare? Do you remember Mother’s rescue?”

“Wait, she rescued me?” Sadly that did nothing to remedy his confusion, eyes trained on her as memories washed over him, “Where are the others?!”

“The man who was to respond to your signal quit the field.”, crossing her arms, she spoke slowly knowing of every word’s importance to him, “the darkspawn won your battle. Those he abandoned were massacred. Your friend...he is not taking it well.”

“Friend...? Wait, Alistair?!”

“The suspicious, dim-witted one who was with you before, yes.”

“He’s...alive...hah! Haha, he’s alive!”, Morrigan’s eyes widened a little as she watched the man sputter out a nervous laugh before burying his face in his hands; relief and guilt moving in waves of his back. She’s not sure what to make of this reaction, relief surely seems correct but guilt? Her thoughts broke when his head jerked back up. “Is he alright?!”

“He is outside by the fire, I suggest you ask him yourself. Mother asked to see you when you awoke.”

“Okay...thank you for your help Morrigan.” Red eyes softened, a relaxed smile directed towards her. Scooting to the side of the bed, he looked for his armor...missing the way she flushed slightly.

“I...you are welcome, though Mother did most of the work. I am no healer.” Words stuttered from her lips, the usual confidence gone for a moment in the face of genuine gratitude. No one has ever _thanked_ her before...what an odd feeling this was. 

“My injuries were no joke, I’ll thank your mother as well.” Finding his clothes neatly folded on a table, armor and weapons to the side, he set forth putting his pants on at least. “What about Alistair? Is he...doing okay?” Gold met red as they looked towards each other, worried if maybe his friend didn’t fare as well.

“He is...as you are. I suppose it would be unkind to say he is being childish…”

“It would be!”, slipping the shirt on, he turned toward her again but this time instead of a smile he looked...disappointed in her, “those were his friends!” 

“And you think they would encourage his blubbering? If so, they are not the sort of Gray Wardens the legends note.” Crossing her arms she glared back, stubbornness taking a backseat to how it didn’t feel right being glared at by this elf. What was he so angry for? She was right after all; they were supposed to be legendary warriors not crying children.

“If anyone didn’t cry after such a loss I’d think they’d have no heart!”, snapping back at her, his expression darkened, it felt like he was speaking about more than Alistair, “mourning the loss of your friends doesn’t make you weak, Morrigan. So please don’t call him that.” Tension grew thick like fog, neither seemed to want to back down; eyes boring into the soul as if they could dig up some unspoken information. That was until he sighed, seemingly done with their conversation and turning from her. The shuffling of leather and buckles now filled the silence, armor returning to its rightful place on his body and it felt right...safe.

“In any case, Mother seems to be waiting for you.”

“See? Here is your fellow Gray Warden, you worry too much young man.” Hue’s eyes moved up as he heard the old woman’s voice, shutting the door behind him before approaching the two. Alistair hurried towards him, hands patting Hue’s arms in awkward fashion. The elf was no worse for wear, thank the Maker.

“You...you’re alive! I thought you were dead for sure.” The tight cords of tension slacked in the human’s chest, voice coming out in both disbelief and elation. Hue couldn’t help but smirk at this, crossing his arms in mock offense.

“Oh, ye of little faith! You really think I’d die that easily?” Meeting Alistair’s chuckle with one of his own, his arms fell back to his sides, “I’m not dead yet.” Relief shortly turned to sorrow when Alistair’s shoulders hunched in, eyes moist from crying earlier. Sadness weighed him down, making the human look so much smaller, wounded. It broke his heart to see.

“Duncan’s dead...the Gray Wardens, even the King. They’re all dead, Hue”, the news froze his veins. He hadn’t known the Gray Wardens for long but they had welcomed him in...Duncan had given him a new life and purpose, had been kind. Though he hadn’t cared for the King he wouldn’t have wished death upon him but...they’re all dead. Gone...even eaten by those damn creatures. Fire replaced ice, blood boiled and stomach churned with those thoughts. How many darkspawn had there been? How many arrows could he fire before overwhelmed? Revenge started to sink their claws into his skin, pounding a drum through his head, almost missing the whispered voice of his friend.

“If it hadn’t been for Morrigan’s mother, we’d be dead on top of that tower.”

“Do not talk about me as if I am not present, lad.” Both men looked over to the old woman, embarrassed that they’d forgotten she was even there.

“I didn’t mean...b-but what do we call you? You never told us your name.”

“Names are pretty, but useless. The Chasind folks call me Flemeth. I suppose it will do.” Eyes widened on that, the fires of revenge smothered for a moment. Even he had heard the story of Flemeth, told around the campfires between the Dalish...whispered in respect between hunters.

“Flemeth? Like in the stories?”, She nodded and now he pieced together why his gut had told him to be respectful, “So...you really are the Witch of the Wilds, huh?”

“What does that mean? I know a bit of magic, and it served you both well, has it not?” Even when she crossed her arms it was done with a grace of someone wise and used to being treated with respect.

“Uh, thank you...for saving us.”, though the question still remains how she saved them, he wasn’t going to give his mouth a chance to accidently insult her. Nodding his head in a bow, Alistair copied his movement. Curiosity was written plainly on their faces but she provided no answer, just waved them off with a satisfied scoff.

“It has always been the Gray Wardens’ duty to unite the lands against the Blight”, the subject change was so quick it had him blinking, “Or did that change when I wasn’t looking?”

“Of course not!”

“But we were fighting darkspawn!”, Alistair spoke up, a hand to his chest, voice teetering on defensive and trembling sorrow, “The king had nearly defeated them! Why would Loghain do this?!” Despite his biting confusion she merely let him finish, sadness seeping into her downturned lips.

“Now that is a good question.”, Hue could see a stone face melt into one of pity, of past sorrows like she knew this would always be the outcome yet still felt sorry for them, “Men’s hearts hold shadows darker than any tainted creature. Perhaps he believes the Blight is an army he can outmaneuver. Perhaps he does not see that the evil behind it is the true threat.”

“The Archdemon.”

“Then we find this archdemon and kill it”, Hue crossed his arms, resolve set even with Flemeth laughing at him.

“By ourselves?! No Gray Warden has ever defeated a Blight without the army of a half-dozen nations at his back!” Wide brown eyes flew to the elf, just the idea was crazy in itself.

“So young, so reckless...you would face one of the Old Gods, tainted by the Blight, commander to all those nightmare, and spit in its eye?”, another laugh when he nodded, “History says it’s a fearsome and immortal thing. And only fools ignore history.”

“If it’s a beast like any other I’ll shoot it down.”

“Hah...I knew there was something about you. Speaking with such confidence...fools would believe you or doubt you; maybe you are just the fool...but a fool who might stand a chance.”

“Even if we knew where it was, we can’t defeat it. I...do not know how.” Alistair piped in again, rubbing the back of his neck. Any and all Gray Warden knowledge had been lost to him when the Order was slain. There were Orders elsewhere but…

“How to kill an archdemon, or how to raise an army? It seems to me, those are two different questions, hmm? Have the Wardens no allies these days?”

“I...I don’t know. Duncan said that the Gray Wardens of Orlais had been called.”, Hue watched as Alistair seemed to fidget, confidence all but gone, “And Arl Eamon would never stand for this, surely!”

“That’s an idea, why don’t we go see him?”

“I suppose...Arl Eamon wasn’t at Ostagar; he still had his men. And he was Cailan’s uncle.”, the more Alistair spoke, the more confidence and anger began to build up in his voice at the growing idea, “I know him. He’s a good man, respected in the Landsmeet. Of course! We could go to Redcliffe and appeal to him for help!”

“Good idea!”

“I still don’t know if Arl Eamon’s help would be enough. He can’t defeat the darkspawn horde by himself.” His gaze turned back to the ground before he heard Hue pat his armor, metal lightly clinking.

“We’ll figure it out Alistair. Can’t give up before we start.” He smiled reassuringly at the human, wanting to restore at least a little of the other’s former confidence. It felt wrong to see such sorrow sinking into his features, but he understood. That it was like a dark sea, crashing wave after wave over your head, threatening to take away your last breath of happiness. Alistair hadn’t known that he helped Hue soothe the stinging nettles of his own sorrow and guilt for spare moments but the elf was determined to repay him nonetheless. 

“You have more at your disposal than you think.” Both men blinked, gears turning in their heads before Alistair gasped.

“The treaties! Gray Wardens can demand aid from dwarves, elves, mages, and other places! They’re obligated to help us during a Blight!”

“I may be old, but dwarves, elves, mages, this Arl Eamon, and who knows what else...this sounds like an army to me.”

“Can we do this? Go to Redcliffe and these other places and...build an army?” Brown eyes focused, that spoken question reflecting much more questions in them as he stared at Hue. He wasn't sure why Alistair was asking him of all people, considering their chain of command. All he could offer was a shrug in response.

“Why not? Isn’t that what Gray Wardens do?”

“So you are set, then? Ready to be Gray Wardens?” Another nod in her direction.

“Yea, thanks for everything, Flemeth.”

“No, no. Thank you. You are the Gray Wardens here, not I.” He caught a warm smile spreading on her face, looking them over with pride like a mother whose children were off to war, “Now...before you go, there is yet one more thing I can offer you.” Door creaking closed, Hue saw Morrigan approach them from the corner of his eye.

“The stew is bubbling, Mother dear. Shall we have two guests for the eve…”, her smile, cold and cat-like, graced them, “or none?”

“The Gray Wardens are leaving shortly, girl. And you will be joining them.”

“Such a shaaaame----what?!” Cockiness turned to confusion as Morrigan’s head whipped around to her mother. Hue and Alistair also looked wide-eyed, unsure if they even heard right.

“You heard me, girl. The last time I looked you had ears!”, a hearty laugh spilled from Flemeth’s mouth, ignoring the disbelief being thrown her way, “Her magic will be useful. Even better, she knows the Wilds and how to get past the horde.”

“Have I no say in this?!” Confusion finally turned to anger as Morrigan’s mouth worked again, snapping at her mother. It’s not like Hue wouldn’t agree, Morrigan does seem like she would be a lot of help but he doesn’t exactly want to travel with someone who doesn’t care for them...or even _want_ to leave for that matter. Alistair also seemed a bit uncomfortable with the suggestion.

“Not to...look a gift horse in the mouth, but won’t this add to our problems? Out of the wilds, she’s an apostate.” Hue elbowed him right in the side, causing Alistair to startle. His expression clearly read that now wasn’t the time for this...whatever weird thing Alistair had a problem with, he still wasn’t sure on that whole templar/postate thing.

“Alistair…”, was all the warning he gave before looking over to the women, “we appreciate it, Flemeth, but I don’t want to force Morrigan to go if she doesn’t want to."

“I don’t want to! I’m not even ready!”

“You must be ready”, Morrigan’s mouth shut tight, Flemeth’s expression soft but it seemed to silence her daughter, “Alone, these two must unite Ferelden against the darkspawn. They need you, Morrigan. Without you, they will surely fail, and all will perish under the Blight. Even I.” She left little to no room to argue, defeat draining the anger from Morrigan’s eyes.

“I...understand.”

“And you, Wardens? Do you understand? I give you that which I value above all in this world. I do this because you must succeed.” Her tone caused Hue to stand up straight, chin up and eyes at full attention. There was no doubt in his mind; this wasn’t the Witch of the Wilds making a deal with him for victory. This was a mother sending her beloved daughter off into danger to help them, the realization having him nod tightly.

“Yea, we’ll keep her safe.” Discussion was over and their stay was now overextended. Morrigan walked off to grab her things, joining the two men quickly with no more than her staff and a bag. After a few goodbyes and jabs at Morrigan, the trio left the solitary hut that smelled of herbs and home, walking for a bit before he was addressed.

“I suggest a village north of the Wilds as our first destination. ‘Tis not far and you will find much you need there”, her voice had gone back to the usual disinterest she liked to display, “ Or, if you prefer, I shall simply be your silent guide. The choice is yours.”

“Pfft, nah. I’d rather you be honest”, he chuckled, sending a smile her way once more which caused her to look thoughtful, “what kind of skills do you have?”

“I know a few spells, though nowhere near as powerful as Mother. I have also studied history. And your Gray Warden treaties.”

“Can you cook?” Alistair entered the conversation, looking over to her from the other side of Hue. Her eyes narrowed into slits, as if that very question soured her tongue.

“I...can cook, yes.”

“Oh thank the Gods”, Hue groaned out in relief, head tilted to the sky in exaggerated gratitude, “Alistair’s cooking is shit!”

“Hey!”, the other warden wanted to argue but found he couldn’t, “Right. My cooking will kill us. That’s why I asked and Hue can’t either.”

“Hey! Yes I can!” He actually managed to look offended, trying to push Alistair but not even managing an inch. This only caused the human to laugh, reaching out to grab onto the slippery archer. Within moments Morrigan found herself being used as a shield between the two in whatever playful banter they had suddenly come up with, her smile looking dangerous.

“I do know at least fifteen different poisons that grow right here in this marsh. Now that I would suggest ‘tis at all related to _cooking._ ” Tone as sharp as a knife, Alistair quickly backed up and gave her room. In fact, he gave her plenty of room, moving to the opposite side of the path...Hue, however, only moved to her side, looking up at her in fascination.

“Whoa, really?! I didn’t think many humans knew a lot about herbs.”

“One does not grow up in the Wilds without obtaining some knowledge, would be reckless not to do so otherwise. Imagine, one wrong slip of the hand and your life ends up forfeit rather than warm with a full belly.” He nods along with her and her smile almost softens before she realises these two were literally acting like buffoons two minutes ago. Right...she was responsible for keeping these idiots alive now, wasn’t she? What a terrible burden that has befallen her, maybe she really was cursed. Keeping quiet for now, she listened to the two prattle on about food or Gray Wardens or whatever idle thought entered their heads. Despite it all being inane, it had at least passed the time and they were on a road now...heading straight to Lothering before something in the distance caught their eyes.

“What is that?” Alistair stepped forward, shielding his eyes from the sun as he squinted for a better look. The figure then began to run towards them, barking and panting. Its tremendous form stopped short in front of Hue, looking up to him with more barks.

“Oh, it’s you!” A boyish smile cracked his face and he immediately began to pet the dog, scratching behind their ears and laughing. “I remember you! The mabari from Ostagar, what are you doing here?”

“Must of imprinted on you, Mabaris choose their masters, creating bonds with them that are nearly unbreakable”, Crossing his arms, he watched Hue practically roll around with the dog and laugh. It would be a heart-warming scene if not for the roars interrupting them, darkspawn running at them in full speed. Fur raised on her neck, the Mabari growled at their new foes as Hue took out his bow.

“Alright. Darkspawn first, then you’re coming with us!” Watching a spell fly by he could hear the disgust in Morrigan’s voice.

“Are you serious? We are not taking along this flea-ridden mongrel, are we?!”

“She’s not a mongrel, she’s a good girl!”, Hue let loose an arrow, sending it right into the forehead of an unarmored Darkspawn, “Her name is Ruffles and she’s coming with us!” Alistair barked out a laugh at Morrigan’s groan, helmet on as he charged right into two darkspawn. With the defeat of Ostagar still ripe in their hearts, both Wardens threw themselves at the creatures with reckless determination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we go, the boys got their quest, some new party members and heading to the first village. Once Lothering is went through you'll start seeing new events and conversations added as well as relationships starting to build.


	8. And It Grows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.”– Anais Nin

If you had asked Hue what his thoughts were on Lothering he would give the response that it was very...brown. The further they moved towards the village, the more open the fields were but what surprised him more was that there was a serious lack of green. Sure there was the occasional bushes and some grass, maybe a tree or two, but everything was so...open. Open and not much excitement save for the occasional darkspawn to kill and raider to chase off. Speaking of which...

“I do not see why you did not just do away with them”, Morrigan frowns, crossing her arms as Hue descended the stairs, the raiders from early chased off easily enough. Though it was rather amusing to see a bunch of grown men run in fear from an elf of such short stature, there was no way Hue could know they wouldn’t come back with reinforcements. Especially with the peculiar information the raiders spouted out, something about these two killing the King. As if Alistair had any sense to accomplish that kind of feat, Hue on the other hand, probably not either but he was much more unpredictable to say the least.

“You suppose I should have killed them?”,he questioned, crinkling his nose at the thought, “Driving them off solved the same problem, what’s the point of killing just because you can?” Well, point taken, though she didn’t have to agree with it. Better to be cautious than to be merciful but then again, she wasn’t one of the mighty Gray Wardens here. Speaking of useless Gray Wardens…

“Well, there it is. Lothering. Pretty as a painting.” Alistair extended his arms out, presenting the hodge-podge village with more flair than needed. Hue leaned on the stone banister, looking over the village in a mixture of awe and disappointment. After Ostagar, the village seems a little lackluster in comparison. Houses made of wood and thatching, patchwork fixes to keep the weather at bay. Dirt roads flattened by the consistent to and fro of workers to their daily tasks. The large stone structure was pretty interesting, so large you could fit a few families in it with a high wall and open arch. So many sounds and smells wafted with the breeze, all so unfamiliar that he fought the urge to jump down and begin exploring. And the people, he’d never seen so many gathered about in different clothes and conversations other than Ostagar! Clothes in various shades of brown, gray, and white greeted his eyes from a distance. It wasn’t “pretty” in his mind but it definitely was fascinating.

“Ah. So you have finally decided to rejoin us, have you? Falling on your blade in grief seemed like too much trouble, I take it?” Oh no. He had forgotten for a moment that these two, for whatever reason, really, _really_ did not get along. Maybe Alistair would ignore her, act the bigger man and they could continue to the tavern...

“Is my being upset so hard to understand?!”, Or fight back, “Have you never lost someone important to you? Just what would you do if your mother died?!” 

“Before or after I stopped laughing?”

“Right. Creepy. Forget I asked.” Ruffles whined and he pet the Mabari behind the ears before turning his attention to the two squabbling hens.

“Are you sure you two aren’t related?” They both gagged, turning away from each other to yell at Hue but he had other plans, “What did you want to talk about, Alistair?” 

“His navel, I suspect. He certainly has been contemplating it for long enough.”

“It is a nice navel.”

“Are you honest--what?”, anger rose and fell within seconds, scowling eyes turned from Morrigan to narrow ones at Hue, “No. No, nevermind, I don’t even want to know where that trail of thought is going.” Hue just shrugged, the beginnings of a smirk pulling at his lips.

“Down to your navel it seems.” Okay, Alistair decided to ignore wherever _that_ was going.

“So, I get it. This is the part where we’re shocked to discover how you’ve never had a friend your entire life”, his mocking tone earned a scoff from Morrigan, gaining some satisfaction out of her offended look.

“I can be friendly when I desire to! Alas, desiring to be more intelligent does not make it so.” 

“Wait...you think friends make you stupid?” Morrigan blinked at the chuckling elf, eyes narrowing.

“I’m beginning to suspect, yes.”

“Anyway...I thought we should talk about where we intend to go, first.” Alistair interrupted, saving them all from yet another looping conversation they were prone to have. The only saving grace of those was that it made the trip seem shorter.

“Got any ideas?”

“This should be good” Ignoring Morrigan’s sneer, Alistair turned to his fellow Gray Warden.

“I think what Flemeth suggested is the best idea. These treaties...have you looked at them?” Hue’s large blinking eyes told him all he needed to know and he sighed, knowing the question about to spill forth, “The treaties, Hue, the ones we got from Flemeth. With these we will be able to ask for assistance, maybe even raise an army.”

“Oh! Those things!”

“There are three main groups we have treaties for: the Dalish elves, the dwarves of Orzammar, and the Circle of Magi. I also think that Arl Eamon is our best bet for help. We might even want to go to him first.”

“My clan’s already moved north…”, Hue cocked his head, eyes turned to the sky, “but there’s another that’s usually in Brecilian forest. Wait...why are you leaving this up to me?” With a furrow brow, he turned his gaze back to the human. Shouldn’t he be the one making the decisions here?

“Well, I don’t know where we should go! I’ll do whatever you decide!” Alistair’s voice cracked a bit, shoulders tight as he deflected back onto the other. “Arl Eamon is a good man, but I don’t know for sure he’s where we should go. I’m not going to fight about it!” That was...weird. Aside from the moping, which would be normal for such heavy losses, Alistair had been more on edge. He'd assumed the added tension and constant bickering with Morrigan was it but now he had his doubts. Was Alistair...lost?

“O...kay. Well, I am a hunter so...I guess that’s fine?” What more could he say? Aside from some hunts, Hue’s never led anything his whole life and now Alistair was just expecting him to do just that. “Still, I’d like to know what you guys think too. The group should be in agreement. What about you Morrigan?”

“Go after your enemy directly. Find this man, Loghain, and kill him. The rest of this business with the treaties can then be done in safety.” Okay, she has a point, it’s a great point but also just a very bad idea in general. One, they have no idea where Loghain was, second…

“Yeees, he certainly wouldn’t see that coming! And it’s not like he has the advantage of an army and experience and-”

“I was asked for my opinion and gave it! If your wish is to come up with reasons why something cannot be done, we will stand here until the darkspawn are upon us!”

“Guys!” His voice cut through, stopping them both, “Morrigan’s right, we can’t fight about this.”

“But we-”

“And you’re right too, going after Loghain now is too risky. There’s no way he hasn’t buried himself in his den, we’d walk right into a trap. For now, let’s get some food and figure things out as we look around.” A heavy sigh left his lips, both humans looked at least a bit guilty. They were all tired and probably just hungry, some food and rest would clear their heads and then they could make all those important decisions.

“There is a tavern not far from the entrance, come.”

All he had wanted was some damn food, maybe a drink, and be off his feet for a moment. Just to relax next to a fire and pretend for just one moment the world wasn't ending. What he hadn’t wanted was to be pulled into a fight right as they walked in the door. The tavern had been full of patrons, chattering and gossiping in a way that filled the whole room with noise. On the upper part he could hear a lute being strummed to some unfamiliar tune. And the smells! He had been eager to try food cooked in a tavern, it always made him curious when the other elves told him about it after their ventures into the villages. His eyes on the prize he hadn't expected to be stopped by some guards, guards that definitely looked like they wanted trouble.

“By order of Loghain, we are to kill the traitorous Gray Wardens.” Again? So this was Loghain’s doing, huh? Not enough to be a coward and let people die in Ostagar but now he was trying to hunt them down? To do what, eradicate the Gray Wardens? Did he hate them that much? A woman with red hair and a soft voice interrupted, dressed in a robe that he had seen people around the Chantry nearby wear. A “sister” Alistair had called them. Sister to whom he had no idea.

“Please, there is no need for violence here.” Had to give her credit, it was worth a shot but the guards were having none of it. Then they drew their weapons and it was chaos. Drawing his bow, he had to be much more precise in such an enclosed space. One miss and he might hit an innocent, the idea that these so-called “guards” didn’t even care about the people screaming in fear around them just made him angrier. Between the five of them, sister included, they had managed to take care of this mess...non-fatally of course. Wow, he’s on a roll today.

“Tell Loghain we know what he did and we’re coming for him” Teeth bared, his red eyes lit up from the fireplace glow, feral as one of the beasts he hunted. With a tight nod they scrambled, pride turned to fear, tripping over themselves right out the tavern. Well, that takes care of that.

“I apologise for interfering, but I couldn’t just sit by and not help.” Anger melted from his face as he turned to the woman...sister. She was pretty and her hair gave off a warm glow in the firelight, as if the flames themselves coloured the strands. The style cupped her face, a braid on the side, with a few strands falling gently on a pale face. Her eyes, blue and clear, were steadfast, holding his gaze before he realised he had yet answered her.

“I appreciate that.” The accent was different though, was she not from Ferelden? It didn’t sound like Marcher. 

“I am glad you found it in your heart to offer those men mercy.” A tilt of her head, smile tight, “Let me introduce myself. I am Leliana, one of the lay sisters of the chantry here in Lothering. Or I was.”

“I”m Hue.”

“They said you were a Gray Warden. I’m surprised you’re an elf, but elves must want the Blight defeated as much as humans, no?” Her voice held genuine such curiosity, he didn’t have the heart to interrupt her, “I know after what happened, you’ll need all the help you can get. That’s why I’m coming along.” He blinked. Once, twice, letting the words sink in and when they finally hit him, he let out a confused sound.

“Wait, what? Why?”

“The Maker told me to.” Again...what? The Maker told her to follow him? His confusion must have been plain on his face because her confidence suddenly deteriorated, “I-I know that sounds... _absolutely_ insane. But it’s true! I had a dream, a vision!”

“More crazy? I thought we were full up” Alistair whispered, scoffing at the idea. Considering he was the more religious of the three of them, if even he didn’t believe her…

“Look at the people here. They are lost in despair, and this darkness, this chaos will spread! The Maker doesn’t want this.”, her voice shook, so desperate in her plea that he actually started to feel for her, “What you do...what you are meant to do, is the Maker’s work. Let me help!” Aside from the fact that he was very much not Andrastian, he found he couldn't argue with her. She so passionately wanted to help, to stop this Blight and save people and whether it was the will of the Creators or Maker or what have you, he wasn’t going to turn that away.

“Well then, welcome to the party Leliana!” Arms spread wide, he welcomed her with a smile, warm gesture causing a smile on her face. The other two humans seemed to look a bit incredulous that they suddenly had a new...traveling partner.

“Perhaps your skull was cracked worse than Mother thought.” All that followed Morrigan's statement was more laughter as Hue walked over to order food. Finally!

After the meal he set about exploring Lothering, drawing exasperation from Morrigan and curiosity from Leliana when he flitted about like a hummingbird. Both women were assured that yes, this is normal, he does it all the time, please don't question it from a defeated Alistair. There was so much to see, so many sounds and smells and people to talk to. What he hadn’t expected was how many people needed help and despite Morrigan’s complaining he solved a few problems around the village, earning thanks and even some rewards. It was nice to be able to do things and it not turn into a giant mess for once. 

Giving the elder some of the extra potions he had stored away, he caught a glint of metal. Curiosity moved his body faster than anyone could utter a word, forced to follow after the elf as he made his way to a large cage just outside the village arch. He heard before he saw; a deep voice reciting something in an unfamiliar language. Inside was a man, a giant of a man! Grayish skin stretched over large muscles and tight features, a strong jaw, sharp brow, and large nose made up his face. Large white braids were fastened tight to his skull, drawing to the back. One of this man's arms was at least equal to both the elf's legs! Red eyes widened in pure awe as Hue took in the giant who stood so still, he almost seemed like a statue. That is until eyes opened up and stared him down.

“You aren’t one of my captors.” Short, deep, to the point. Hue wasn’t sure why but that voice had him standing up straighter. “I have nothing to say that would amuse you, elf. Leave me in peace.”

“What are you?” Words, innocent as they were, left his mouth without filter.

“I am Qunari, is that not obvious?” Head shook no but it was only answered with a deep sigh.

“You’re a prisoner? Who put you in there?”

“I’m in a cage, am I not? I’ve been placed here by the Chantry.”

“The revered mother said he slaughtered an entire family...even the children”, Leliana’s voice reminded him that his friends had followed him, all standing behind the elf. Wide eyes froze, turning back to the strange man with that new knowledge.

“It is as she says.” Admittance; plain and simple. Something about that seemed...off to Hue though, what kind of murderer just admits their guilt and with such a tone? “I am Sten of the Beresaad--the vanguard--of the qunari peoples.”

“Ah, I’m Hue. Gray Warden. Nice to meet you.”

“You mock me.”, eyes narrowed but then replaced with confusion, “Or you show manners I have not come to expect in your lands.”

“Well, I mean...you introduced yourself so politely…”, finger scratched his cheek, was he not supposed to do that? The way this Qunari?...was staring at him was a little nerve-wracking, it was like the taller man was reading him like a book.

“It matters little, I will die soon enough.” Suddenly it dawned on him that Sten was actually locked in that cage, probably meant to starve to death or worse. 

“This is a proud and powerful creature, trapped as prey for the darkspawn. If you cannot see a use for him, I suggest releasing him for mercy’s sake alone.”

“Mercy?”, Alistair snorted in surprise, “I wouldn’t have expected that from you.”

“I would also suggest that Alistair take his place in the cage.”

“Yes, that’s what I would have expected.” Morrigan’s words made Hue pause, ignoring their bantering as brow creased in thought. A use for him? It seemed leaving anyone to the fate of darkspawn was much too cruel, that he knew. If Sten had done what he said then yes, he did indeed deserve punishment but Hue just couldn’t shake the feeling there was more to this. It felt...odd and whenever he felt something was odd, he knew it wasn’t what it actually was. Was it? 

“Are you guilty?” Sten was silent for a moment, furrowed brow regarding the elf.

“Are you asking if I feel guilt, or if I am responsible for the deed?” A pause and then his expression was stone once more, “However I feel, whatever I’ve done, my life is forfeit now. My regret will not bring back the dead.” And there it was, his decision made, he was going to get Sten to join them and that was that.

As much as he wanted to run and explore the Chantry and all it's nooks and crannies he was on a mission. Soldiers were standing around in various spots, Templars, as Alistair pointed out to him,. So that symbol _was_ did mark them as Templars, that information would be useful for later. Who knows who might become their enemy and if the shem want to run around with large symbols emblazoned on their shields and armor to alert everyone who they were well...that seemed a them problem. Before any of that he marched his group right into the study in the back, determination set on his face.

Despite knowing the crime Leliana had actually helped him convince the Revered Mother to let them release Sten, as long as it was in Hue’s custody. She had caught on to his plan pretty quickly, offering assurances where he could not. Impressed, he smiled at her as they headed back into the main part of the Chantry.

“You’re really smart Leliana!”

“Oh? Thank you...I’m not sure what I did though.”

“You helped me get Sten out”, his smile was bright, genuine and she couldn’t help her own growing, “like redemption right? If he did do it, then stopping a Blight is better than him rotting away right?” Yes, she had guessed that was what he was thinking but it felt good hearing the words spill from his mouth. The Maker had truly chosen a merciful one. She watched as Hue approached the head templar, hands moving in animated fashion to his speech and the templar nodded. Seems he was quite pleased to hear that Hue had taken care of some bandits outside of the village. Her eyes followed the rest of her new companions; Alistair was busy talking to a knight nearby and Morrigan was near the door, eyeing every templar as if they’d attack on spot. 

“Let’s go get Sten!” Hue’s cheerful voice popped up, his business done as he looked towards his friend, “Hey Alistair, let’s go!”

“Go ahead, I’ll join you.” With a nod, Hue walked right out the chantry with the two women, heading back to the cage.

“You wish something more of me?”

“Yea, I’m getting you out.” Sten’s eyes widened as the small elf started to unlock the cage, key in hand.

“I confess, I did not think the priestess would part with it.”

“She only agreed as long as you came with me.” The door swung open, Hue looked him right in the eye and Sten could only meet them in kind.

“Fine then, I will follow you against the Blight. In doing so I shall find my atonement.” Stepping out, he stretched out the limbs that had been cramped in that damn cage for too long. A warm smile greeted him, almost child-like in its happiness.

“Thanks Sten! Glad to have you with us!” These thanks and platitudes were undeserving to him, even if he was fighting a Blight he was still doing it for selfish reasons. 

“May we proceed? I am eager to be elsewhere.” With a laugh, Hue led his new friends back to go pick up Alistair as well as some equipment for Sten and be on their way. To where? Creators knew but with two new friends, he felt like it was going to be interesting. They decided to take the back way from Lothering, marching up the stairs when they heard a commotion. On the bridge were two dwarven merchants, cart trashed and boxes strewn about, screaming at their attackers. Only the attackers weren't raiders, the unholy growl of darkspawn was turned upon them as soon as they came into view. Foul creatures wasted no time at all running at them, swords meeting swords as they engaged. Luckily with Leliana and Sten now in their ranks it took no time at all for these damnable things to be slain, pulling an arrow embedded into one's chest. Maybe they could do this after all...

"Mighty timely arrival there, my friend. I'm much obliged." The thankful voice had him turn, looking upon the dwarves who no seemed afraid. He smiled back at the one with the beard, nodding his head.

"You're welcome, uh..."

"The name's Bodahn Feddic, merchant and entrepreneur", that last word seemed important but Bodahn continued on, patting the other dwarf on the shoulder, "This here is my son, Sandal. Say hello, my boy."

"Hello."

"Road's been mighty dangerous these days. Mind if I ask what brings you out here? Perhaps we're going the same way." Hue shrugged a shoulder.

"You can but I don't know if you want to travel with Gray Wardens."

"Gray Wardens, hm? My, that does rather explain a lot", Bodhan stroked his beard, not even thinking on the prospect, "No offense, but I suspect there's more excitement on your path than my boy and I can handle. Allow me to bid you farewell and good fortune, though."

"Goodbye."

"Same to you." With that, Hue waved at them before joining up with his friends. Those two seem nice enough, hopefully they don't find anymore trouble. He could hear Bodhan's voice distantly as their feet carried them further on.

"Now, then. Let's get this mess cleaned up, shall we?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lothering felt like a one chapter type of deal and now we have Leliana and Sten! I wrote and rewrote a lot of this chapter because I wanted to strike the perfect balance of describing Lothering and everyone and then not over-describe them. I also just wanted to set the stage for the other two companions and their initial reactions/judgements of Hue. Hope you enjoy!! 
> 
> I talk Dragon Age on twitter @Tabikato


	9. Travels along Cliffs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I ended up where I needed to be." - Douglas Adams

The path to Redcliffe came into view amongst a clear sky; dirt road traveled a thousand times leading them upwards in the cliffs. Modest wooden buildings peaked out, creating a very picturesque scene before them. It was like the blue sky touched the tops of roofs, spilling white clouds like paint over the tinted mountains. Some grass and trees dotted their trip upwards, growing out from the stone with the same stubborn survival this group seemed to hold dear. Outcropping of rocks appeared more orange than red in the direct sunlight but Hue’s attention was on his anxious fellow Warden than the pigment of stone. Which was a lovely colour, but that was beside point.

It had been Alistair’s idea to travel here. Well, it had been phrased as a “suggestion” but when his friend had told him that he’d heard Arl Eamon was ill, the man who apparently had raised Alistair, it wasn’t much of a no-brainer for him. After all, they had to start somewhere and this seemed as good of a place as any. Plus if Alistair had friends here it might be much easier to convince Redcliffe to join them for the inevitable battle to come. So when Alistair had rejoined them after Sten’s freedom, the plan was set to head east through the forests and towards Lake Calenhad. 

This time, however, he didn’t just have Alistair and Morrigan’s bickering to listen to (though it was funny...sometimes). Leliana had proven to be a wonderful story-teller, detailing tales that captured his attention thoroughly. Some were sad, caked in loss and injustice but others told of epic battles or funny anecdotes and she enjoyed his curiosity, answering questions whenever they flew from his mouth. Sten, on the other hand, kept very quiet and usually answered his questions in short, pointed answers or brushed them off with slight irritation. Of course, when had that ever been enough to stop him from finding out about someone? Hue was determined to figure out his new companions...maybe friends? Either way if they were going to run off and battle darkspawn they should at least trust each other and knowing each other was half the battle...or fun, he's sure he's heard that before. 

Camping for the night had been an interesting insight to their dynamic too; out of the three humans Morrigan seemed more used to "roughing it". Not sure what that quite meant. Which had them leave the cooking to her even with her threat of poisoning Alistair because “we only need one Gray Warden right? Let’s keep the one who doesn’t trip all over himself in asinine whining.” Hue designated himself the one to hunt for meat, something familiar he could do without much thought after having his poor brain racked for, damn, it had already been a week. That and as much as he was enjoying the company of his new companions, the need to seek out some quiet wrapped its tendrils around him, pulling him towards the sunset soaked tree-line surrounding their camp.

Nodding towards Sten who beared an armful of wood, his lean form disappeared quickly into the brush, careful to make the least amount of sound. Calm settled on his skin, green and the smell of wood wrapping him in a blanket of familiarity. He wanted to laugh...when he was back with his clan he had dreamed of adventures out in the world. Now that he had been thrust into the deep waters of reality, his instincts screamed to break the surface and swim back to what he knew. Back to the aravels with their wood-grain surfaces, the bleating of the halla and the smell of home cooking wafting through the camp. To elven tongue excitedly chittering about the latest hunt or some new relic found or even what chores were assigned that day...to his friend pulling him away to hide from those chores.

Steps halted, the only sound breaking the haze of silence being the rustling of leaves through a wayward breeze. The steady hands on the bow lost their strength, string losing their tautness when dropped to his side. Suddenly his hunt was long forgotten, crimson eyes staring distantly out through the maze of brown and green. Tamlen. Through the urgency of his new mission and the sudden appearance of new companions, his mind hadn’t been able to process much of the new information let alone old. Now that no distractions greeted him, it had wandered back...back to his clan and to his friend whose loss still split cracks into his heart. Had he cried for him yet? Mourned? Has there been any time to?

The dusk-tinted leaves became a blurry mess, like droplets of water spreading paint over parchment. Just a few minutes...they couldn’t fault him for just a few minutes of mourning could they?

Deafening roar lit up the poisoned sky, acidic in it’s unnatural green hue. Though now with more clarity he realised it wasn’t a sky but a stone ceiling, coloured by the miasma choking the air. Perched on a large stone bridge was a dragon, purple in colour and rotting in places, eyes sunken and dark as sin. The roar it released vibrated the very stone underfoot, fire billowing from it’s gnarled mouth. It was looking down below, screaming in a tongue that Hue couldn’t possibly understand as thousands upon thousands of darkspawn march in the giant crevice below. As if the very earth split open, pouring them out like an army of angry ants. Breathe sped up, the heat trickling through his blood as he watched this march of death and suddenly he felt a gaze boring into his very soul. The soulless face twisted and stretched in grotesque form was staring right at him...face to face with the Archdemon itself. 

Sitting up with a jolt, his hands reached out to the ground to steady his dizziness. That roar still rang in his ears, deaf to his own labored panting as wide eyes blinked. Acid turned to dirt, a hand running through the hair plastered on his face with sweat. A dream? No, he swore he could feel the almost boiling breathe from that monstrosity on his face. Barking suddenly stopped becoming distant as Ruffles moved closer to him, poking her giant nose into Hue’s face and sniffing. Camp...he was in camp…

“Bad dreams, huh?” A familiar voice spoke close to him and he looked up, noticing Alistair was sitting by the fire close by. His smile was small as the elf’s mind finally settled back into reality.

“It seemed so real…”

“Well it is real, sort of”, shrugging one shoulder Alistair stared back at the fire, “You see, part of being a Gray Warden is being able to hear the darkspawn. That’s what your dream was. Hearing them. The Archdemon, it…”talks” to the horde, and we feel it just as they do. That’s why we know this is really a Blight.”

“Fantastic…”, Hue flopped back down onto his bedding, arm covering his eyes with a sigh, “ so that dragon is...the Archdemon?”

“I don’t know if it’s really a dragon, but it sure looks like one. But yes, that’s the Archdemon.”, He felt a pat on his leg, lifting up his arm to see the other, “It takes a bit, but eventually you can block the dreams out. Some of the older Gray Wardens say they can understand the archdemon a bit, but I sure can’t.”

“Same, all I got was”, he then proceeds to make a gutteral sound in the softest roar he could manage, no point in waking the rest of the camp. Alistair’s chuckle cut the tension, letting them both fall into the silent warmth of the fireside.

“Anyhow, when I heard you thrashing around, I thought I should tell you. It was scary at first for me, too.”

“Did you piss yourself because I feel like I’m about to…”, that warm chuckle brought a smile to his face and the elf sat up again, realising he should probably tend to that need before sleep took him once more, “ Thank you, Alistair. I appreciate it.”

“That’s what I’m here for! To deliver unpleasant news and witty one-liners!”

“Hey if the Gray Warden thing doesn’t work out, you should consider a career change to bearer of bad news.”

“Brillant. Do I get a nice uniform to go with that? That’s a deal-breaker if not”, Hue laughed as he got to his feet, patting the human on the shoulder before going to take care of business.

Which brings him back to this point in time, Alistair drumming his fingers nervously against his thighs as they headed towards their destination. He could hear Morrigan and Leliana talking a bit behind them, engrossed in whatever they were discussing. Now seemed better than anytime to bring this up, especially since they’ve both had time to process.

“Do you want to talk about Duncan?” Metal clattered a bit when Alistair jolted from his thoughts, looking down at his companion. Slight worry painted itself on the elf’s face and Alistair felt bad he had been so obvious stewing in his own thoughts.

“You don’t have to do that. I know you didn’t know him as long as I did.”

“That makes no difference”, silence was his answer as Alistair went back to staring at the feet, “ He was like a father to you. I get it.” Another bout of silence hung in the air between them before he heard a shaky sigh.

“I...should have handled it better. Duncan warned me right from the beginning this could happen.”, running a hand over his face, Alistair tried his best to keep his emotions calm...Maker he was always bad at that, “Any of us could die in battle. I shouldn’t have lost it, not when so much is riding on us, not with the Blight and...and everything. I’m sorry.”

“Even if we know that it doesn’t make the pain any less…”, brown eyes turned back to his friend, the words chipping away at the weight on his shoulders, “especially when you’re close to them.” Melancholy passed over Hue’s face so fast that Alistair almost missed it, maybe his fellow Gray Warden knew more about loss than he initially thought. Though maybe it was a bit inappropriate to try to dig that out when Hue was doing his best to comfort him...in due time perhaps.

“I’d...like to have a proper funeral for him. Maybe once this is all done, if we’re still alive. I don’t think he had any family to speak of.”

“He had you.”

“I suppose he did”, a soft chuckle, “It probably sounds stupid, but part of me wishes I was with him. In the battle. I feel like I abandoned him.”

“No...it’s not stupid. I understand…”, guilt crept into Hue’s voice, it was raw, like the wound had yet to properly heal and Alistair cleared his throat, deciding it might be best to steer from this topic at least.

“The Dalish don’t practice cremation, do they? How do your people honour your dead?” That subject change seemed to wipe the sorrow from the elf’s face, tilting his head in thought at this new question.

“We bury them and plant a tree over their remains. From the earth, back to the earth.”

“That sounds quite beautiful, life springing from death.”, he mused, it was rather poetic, “Thank you. Really, I mean it. It was good to talk about it, at least a little.”

“What are friends for”, hands behind his head, Hue shrugged, missing the smile that spread over the human’s face, “maybe when you go give Duncan a funeral after all this, I can come with?”

“I’d like that. So would he, I think.”

“That’s not all you were nervous about, was it?”, Alistair cocked his head in confusion, “You said Arl Eamon raised you, right? But you were also thrown into the Chantry…”

“Did I say that? I meant the dogs raised me! Giant, slobbering dogs from the Anderfels. A whole pack of them, in fact.”

“That would explain the smell”, he had to hold back a laugh when Alistair clutched his chest, pretending to look wounded.

“Well, it wasn’t until I was eight that I discovered you didn’t have to lick yourself clean. Old habits die hard, you know.” Okay, now he had to laugh, the image of Alistair licking himself clean like a dog crept vividly into his mind and he wasn’t sure if that was hilarious or disturbing...or both.

“That would explain the breath as well!”

“And my table manners, too! Though, come to think of it, they weren’t all that different from the other templars. Or did I dream all of that? Funny the dreams you’ll have when you sleep on the cold, hard ground, isn’t it?”

“I’m sorry, I’m still stuck on the fact you _lied_ to me”, a brow quirked up on Alistair’s face at Hue’s overly-dramatic hurt look, as if he caught Alistair doing something scandalous, “you told me you never once touched yourself and now I’m hearing you used your own mouth to…” Words broke off into raucous laughter at how red Alistair’s face became, who was now stuttering to try to defend himself from such an accusation. Narrowing his eyes, he pushed Hue who stumbled a bit, if only because his own harsh laugh was throwing him off balance. Tears threatened to spill from his eyes, breathe trying to catch up when he fell back in line with the other. Damn, Alistair was too easy. Unbeknownst to him the girls were looking at their backs curiously now though Morrigan was pretty sure whatever they were talking about, it was more than likely idiotic.

“I hate you.”

“No you don’t”, that cheeky grin did nothing to stave off the red in his cheeks, embarrassed by even the thought...why did Hue have to be so stupidly dirty sometimes, “alright, alright, come on. Tell me the truth now.”

“Fine…”, anything to get away from that topic at least, “Let’s see. How do I explain this? I’m a bastard. And before you make any smart comments, I mean the fatherless kind.” A finger pointed into Hue’s face who was biting his own lip, holding back another bout of laughter.

“Okay.”

“My mother was a serving girl in Redcliffe Castle who died when I was very young. Arl Eamon wasn’t my father, but he took me in anyhow and put a roof over my head.”, the laughter died in his throat as he listened, the seriousness in the other Warden’s voice burying the earlier mirth, “He was good to me, and he didn’t have to be. I respect the man and I don’t blame him any more for sending me off to the Chantry once I was old enough.” He looked distant...as if he was that boy again, remembering it all vividly. Hue could understand growing up with no parents but...he wondered if he’d have been the same if his clan had sent him away just like that. To be left to the devices of an order or church or whatever.

“Why did he send you to the Chantry?” Another sigh, another look of defeat. Hue was starting to realise that Alistair seemed to believe he had deserved this fate...which in turn was making him feel angry for his friend. 

“Arl Eamon eventually married a young woman from Orlais, which caused all sorts of problems between him and the king because it was so soon after the war. But he loved her…”, resignation seemed to settle on Alistair’s smile at this point, “Anyhow, the new Arlessa resented the rumours which pegged me as his bastard. They weren’t true, but of course they existed. The arl didn’t care, but she did. So off I was packed to the nearest monastery at age ten. Just as well. The arlessa made sure the castle wasn’t a home to me by that point. She despised me.” 

“So...I punch her when we get there right?” Alistair’s head whipped up so fast his vision almost blurred, staring incredulous at Hue. The elf’s anger wasn’t even subtle, it was sketched plain on his face for any to see.

“What?! No!” Real fear seeped into his nerves. Maker, Hue would not hit the Arlessa upon arrival, right? Right, Oh Andraste, who was he kidding, Hue absolutely would.

“Why not?! You may have given up on being angry about it but it pisses me off!”, teeth grinding, Hue had to stop himself from punching a tree just to get this wild rage under control, “ What a horrible thing to do to a child! You can’t just toss them out because they’re inconvenient!” A hand reached out but then dropped to his side, words actually escaped Alistair for once as he watched his companion explode with reckless emotion. He was used to people being angry at him, not for him...a weird, bubbling feeling rising in his chest. It was a cocktail of joy, confusion, and...friendship? Maybe Hue was right...maybe he had given up on being angry about it but it’s hard not to when the world tells you it’s all your fault anyway.

“Maybe. She felt threatened by my presence, I can see that now. I can’t say I blame her. She wondered if the rumours were true herself, I bet.”

“You should blame her! Who could be threatened by a child?!” Lips parted to explain exactly why she would but he stopped...breath drawing in instead. Emotions were waffling inside of him; Hue had proven himself quite the friend and he doubted the elf would treat him much differently. After all, human politics seemed to go over his head so he wondered if Hue would even know the importance of it anyway. On the other hand, what if he did tell him and the elf treated him differently...gingerly like those before? He doesn’t know if he could handle that.

“Anyway”, he turned his face to the sky, determined not to meet the other’s eyes, “ I remember I had an amulet with Andraste’s holy symbol on it. The only thing I had of my mother’s. I was so furious at being sent away I tore it off and threw it at the wall and it shattered. Stupid, stupid thing to do. The Arl came by the monastery a few times to see how I was, but I was stubborn. I hated it there and blamed him for everything...and eventually he just stopped coming.” The gentle pat on his back brought his face back down, Hue’s earlier look of anger replaced by that of well-meaning pity.

“You were young and hurt.”

“And raised by dogs. Or I may as well have been, the way I acted. But maybe all young bastards act like that, I don’t know.”, the self-depreciating chuckle struck a cord in Hue, making him feel much more protective towards the other man, “All I know is that the Arl is a good man and well-loved by the people. He also was King Cailan’s uncle, so he has a personal motivation to see Loghain pay for what he did.” It was silent for a beat, neither looking at each other and Alistair thought that’s where it would end before he felt another pat on his back.

“I might still punch someone…”

“ _Please don’t._ ”

Eventually the rest of the group had fallen in with them, the ladies curious as to their more somber mood but the men easily waved it off. Well, more like Alistair joked and Morrigan snarked at him, causing a domino effect of them arguing yet again. Even with the sparks flying between the two, the air had gotten much lighter and soon they found themselves in front of the bridge leading to Redcliffe village. Nerves shot up Alistair’s spine...even if he didn’t tell Hue directly he was sure the elf would find out, there was no way it would stay hidden once they reached the castle. Imagining the looks on their faces once he was outed built up a weird resolve in the pit of his stomach. No, this was his to tell and if anyone was going to tell his friend, it would be him. Reaching out suddenly, he grabbed Hue by the wrist and halted him, making the other Warden startle.

“Wh-Alistair?!” The rest of the group stopped and turned towards the noise, curious looks over Alistair’s now paling face. Shit. He hadn’t thought about the others being there.

“Uh, one moment. I need to speak with Hue. Privately. Gray Warden business, you know.” Without waiting for any confirmation, he pulled Hue out of ear-shot, ignoring Morrigan’s comment on how he was wasting their precious time. Once he felt they were far enough away, he let go of the elf’s wrist, pacing a bit as his mind racked with where to start. Luckily Hue gave him that lead-in, hands on his hips and following the human with his eyes.

“So? What’s wrong?”

“I need to tell you something. I, ah, should probably have told you earlier”, Sighing, he rubbed the back of his neck, “we’re friends, right?” His nerves almost faltered with the unimpressed look Hue was giving him.

“I’m not gonna like this, am I?” Scratching the back of his head, he contemplated talking himself out of this but Hue motioned for him to continue. Oh well, it’s now or never.

“I told you before how Arl Eamon raised me, right? That my mother was a serving girl at the castle and took me in?”

“Yeeeaaa…?”

“The reason he did that was because...well, because my father was King Maric. Which made Cailan my...half-brother I suppose.” Hue’s eyes actually widened, hilariously so but neither man was laughing. Arms dropped to the side and words caught in his throat, the image of a prince overlaying with Alistair was just not fitting. Of course the only human royalty he had ever known was Cailan...oh. Oh, that’s...he suddenly remembered how he spoke of the King.

“Alistair, I’m sorr-” Alistair shook his head, cutting him off.

“It’s fine, not why I told you.”

“So…”, dragging out the vowel, he looked up at the other with a cheeky grin, “you’re not just a bastard but a royal bastard?” That one made Alistair laugh, relaxing his shoulders.

“Ha! Yea, I guess it does at that. I should use that line more often!” his chuckling died down, eyes moving from amusement to guilt, “I would have told you but...it never really meant anything to me. I was inconvenient, a possible threat to Cailan’s rule and so they kept me secret. I never talked about it to anyone.” 

“Except now…” The implication actually drew warmth into his chest, knowing that his new friend trusted him so much already.

“Everyone who knew either resented me for it or they coddled me...even Duncan kept me out of the fighting because of it. I didn’t want you to know, as long as possible. I’m sorry.”

“What do you have to be sorry for?” Alistair’s head popped up, his staring contest with the ground interrupted, “you didn’t want to be treated differently. I got that.” The sigh of relief that escaped the human made Hue chuckle, watching most if not all the tension leave the other Warden’s body.

“Good. I’m glad. It’s not like I got any special treatment for it, anyhow.”

“Won’t get it from me anyway.” Alistair snorted at that.

“That’s what I like about you Hue, you’re such a jerk.” Reaching out, Alistair tried to ruffle that blonde poof of hair but Hue wrestled away. Laughter dispelled any lingering tension, making the elf cock his head at the other.

“Hiding anything else?”

“Besides my unholy love of fine cheeses and a minor obsession with my hair, no. Just the Prince thing.”

“Good because Morrigan looks ready to kill us if we stall any longer.” Pointing behind him, Alistair looked over to see that Morrigan indeed looked rigid with annoyance. Arms crossed and foot tapping as she groaned dramatically, like waiting on both of them was killing her. Knowing her, it probably was. Both men snorted with hushed laughter before walking back to the group, straightening their faces out in an attempt at maturity.

“Are you both done idling away our precious time, hm? It is not as if a Blight is upon us or anything”, venom laced her tone but instead of falling in line, it only seemed to make both men crack a smile, “may I remind you that it was your decision to come here?”

“We’re going, see? One foot in front of the other, marching towards Redcliffe!”, Alistair and Hue slowly started to put one foot in front of the other in exaggerated movements. Leliana hid a smile behind her hand, watching the scene unfold and Sten rubbed the bridge of his nose in annoyance. Glaring daggers at them, Morrigan contemplated many insults before a wicked smile spread.

“Tell me, have either of you ever wished you could soar like the birds do?” Staff in hand, they could feel the magic building up around her. Both men hurried their steps, marching quickly towards the bridge...before she sent them both off the cliffs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to devote a chapter to Alistair's background/conversation and establish more of a friendship between the two before we hit Redcliff. Also gives a bit of insight into Hue's thoughts and how he's processing everything. He'll get there...eventually. 
> 
> The quote being by Douglas Adams is amusing to me because once my friends and I did a writing test where you submit a piece of your writing and it tells you which author your writing style is comparable to. So guess who got Douglas Adams. Bet your ass I did, which is great, I love his work. My friend didn't make out so well, sadly.


	10. Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “There's treachery in her hips, rebellion in her heart & magic in her mind.” - Curtis Tyrone Jones

He should have known, Creators should he have known. Things were never going to be easy for them, not with fate deciding their path. She obviously had it out for them, what was that old saying? Strength through adversity? If that was the case he should be stronger than 5 Stens at this point but alas. Since arriving in Redcliffe village they had learned two things; the Arl was indeed ill and the castle grounds have since been overrun by demons. If that wasn’t a problem in itself the unholy bastards seem to come down to the village every night, killing anyone they could find before retreating back at dawn. Which was...really strange if he thought about it. Which he did.

Of course he decided right away they couldn’t just leave this be. After all, this is what being a Gray Warden meant, right? Saving people from evil and guarding against the Blight, if they walked away from this then he’d be rejecting what he’d given his own life for. Alistair, of course, agreed wholeheartedly, joined in by Leliana. His fellow Gray Warden had more of a personal stake in this than he did but he wasn’t going to leave him alone. No, somewhere along the way they had decided they were going to have each other's backs no matter what. Maybe it wasn’t quite the level of kinship he had with his clan but it was still important to him. Alistair had become important to him...now there was a thought.

Morrigan felt it was a waste of time, exclaiming so with no hint of hesitation or remorse. Sten also agreed to this until the elf had somehow managed to convince him otherwise. That probably surprised Hue more than anyone but he was grateful that the Qunari saw his reasoning. Four against one won out and Morrigan begrudgingly agreed to help, making sure they knew how _much_ she suffered for it. Teagan was ecstatic for their help, his shoulders relaxing as he realised they probably stood a better chance now. Leaving Alistair to sort out the details with the Bann, Hue slowly started to wander around inside the Chantry.

Villagers who could not fight were hidden in the building; mainly consisting of women and children with a few elderly who could no longer lift a sword. If the defenses of the village were to fall then the Bann was the last line to protect these poor people. Talking to them didn’t shed much more light on the situation, no one knew where the creatures had come from, only that they came at night, attacked, and left in the morning back to the castle. So he decided to take in the Chantry itself, letting his eyes wander over the walls and ceiling. In Lothering there had been too much to do, he didn’t get to look as much as he’d like. Even he had heard of these buildings where humans go to worship the Maker and his bride but had never stepped foot in one until Lothering.

The large stone building was just as large inside; ceiling stretching to the sky as large wooden beams held the roof aloft. Circular chandeliers hung down, candles burning with a hazy glow in their grips. Sunlight filtered in through coloured glass, each chip placed in a way to create images and patterns. He liked those the most, the light creating cascades of color on the stone floor, as if one could reach out and be painted by a rainbow. Which he did, letting his arms become patterned in flecks of blue, red, and more. Some paintings lined the walls but their colours weren’t as joyful; muted and filled with fire, war, and betrayal. Leliana had told him about Andraste, how she was betrayed by her mortal husband while leading a war against Tevinter in the name of the Maker. A story of heroism and tragedy like most tales were. Eyes fixed on the large, golden statue behind Teagan and Alistair, propped up on a higher level and some of the humans were kneeling before it, praying. He was going to move closer, to see it in more detail when his nose picked up something. Flowers...and the smell of ash, it drifted closer to him.

Turning his head to the source, he spied a woman staring back at him from across the way. Her blue eyes were intense, clear, reading his soul as if he were a book she plucked up. Long, wavy hair cascaded over her shoulders like strands of liquid gold, as fine as the threads used in embroidery. A painted smile, like Morrigan’s, but red like rose petals sent an odd feeling down his spine. It was as if time had stopped, fading everything in the Chantry until just they existed. Beautiful for a human but he couldn’t shake the crawling sensation through his skin; just like when Flemeth had stared at him. As if she knew everything about him in a blink of an eye. Once she turned her gaze away the spell shattered, melting the paralysis that had surrounded him. Her attention on the villagers nearby, speaking to them just out of earshot. Immediately he walked over to Alistair, who luckily was done talking to the Bann and had been looking over his shield.

“H-hey, Alistair”, a sharp tug on the human’s arm drew his attention, “there’s something weird about that woman over there.”

“Weird, huh”, knowing Hue, something weird was probably relatively normal but Alistair humoured his friend, looking in the direction the elf waved. Time seemed to still like wind ceasing to blow, breath catching in his throat as brown eyes widened in awe. They trailed over long, golden hair, a pretty face, and a well...developed figure draped in mostly rich purple. Breathing in air that felt light and fuzzy, he was rooted to the spot, mouth ajar. Maker’s breath, she was the most beautiful woman he ever saw. 

_CLANG!_

His fingers forgot how to work and his shield dropped to the floor with a noise to wake the whole Fade. The loud, reverberating clang echoed off every inch of stone, causing conversations to halt and eyes to turn. In the middle of all the gazes sat Alistair desperately fumbling with his shield, face blossomed red, matching the drapery. Whispered curses spilled from his lips at how slippery his stupid shield had suddenly become. Hue watched his friend curiously, eyes flicking from Alistair to the woman and then back before it dawned on him.

“Ooooh”, a laugh started bubbling from his throat, wiggling his eyebrows at his embarrassed friend who finally managed to pick up his shield.

“N-no. No, don’t even-”, clearing his throat, Alistair returned the shield to his back, “w-what’s wrong with her?”

“Nothing it seems, if we go by you!”, Hue cackled, causing the other to groan, great he was never going to hear the end of this. The commotion seemed to attract the attention of said woman, excusing herself to come over.

“S-she’s coming over”, Alistair stuttered but that only caused the elf to laugh harder, offering no help to his floundering friend. His whole body went rigid when she finally approached them, blue eyes trailing over their figures.

“So, you both are the famous Gray Wardens? The villagers said you are helping, I thank you for your kindness.” Nodding politely to them, she offered a small smile. Maker, even her accented voice was lovely. Mature but with a lilt to it, making him want to melt into the silkiness. Alistair just gaped before he realised he was supposed to be answering back. Right, words…

“It’s no-”, his voice cracked, he cleared it loudly before making it deeper, “It’s no trouble, simply what we do. Fighting darkspawn, saving lives, protecting the land from forces of darkness. I, well...I’m Alistair and this is Hue. May we have your name Miss?”

“Smooth…”, Hue whispered under his breath and Alistair fought the urge to elbow him in the head. 

Honestly, he should be awarded for his amazing self-restraint…

“My name is Sibylle, it is a pleasure to meet you”, tilting her head in a bow, curiosity alight in her eyes, “Well...I feel safe knowing such a strong Gray Warden is here to save us. However, if you do not oppose help, might I offer mine?” He felt the heat rise in his face, blush spreading from his cheeks to his ears. Words spilled like a fountain overrunning it’s brim.

“Of course! I-we-certainly would not turn you down-away, turn you away... _turn your help away_ ”, Maker, why couldn’t he get his words out properly and damn it all, Hue is laughing again, “Please don’t mind me, never had a proper education you see, raised by wild Mabari. You’d think that’d make me a people person...man’s best friend you know but I only managed to get the barking and bad table manners bit down. Tragic really. At least I don’t drool, I suppose. The attacking part does help with darkspawn but I never had good jaw grip- _I’m just going to stop talking now._ ”

Closing his eyes he prayed for the Maker or Andraste herself to show him mercy and just strike him where he stood. A good, old quick smite right off the face of Thedas would be lovely. Hue bit his lip, holding in the roar of laughter that threatened to erupt from him. The scene was like a waterfall of awkwardness pooling around them and Alistair looked ready to drop dead on the spot, face lit up hotter than a lantern. He’d never witnessed a man utterly destroy himself in a few sentences...although. The woman chuckled underneath her breath, hand over mouth but Hue could see amusement in her eyes as she studied Alistair.

“Are you always like this or am I lucky?”

“What…?” Alistair’s eyes popped open, almost right out of his head, not sure he heard her right, but he had no chance to question before she changed subject.

“Regardless, I can help, there is foul magic at work here.”

“What do you mean?” She shrugs at Alistair’s question.

“I haven’t been here long enough to get close to the castle”, she waved her hand towards the villagers, “they needed help. However, isn’t it rather strange that demons have congregated at the castle and only attack at certain times? Almost as if…”

“Someone is commanding them”, the Wardens look back at Morrigan, who sauntered up to their group. She was soon joined by Sten and Leliana, the woman Sibylle nodding at her words.

“That may be the case, either way we will not know unless we go there”, blue eyes flicked to one of the windows, the orangish hue casting a shadow over her face, “but we must wait until morning. Night will approach soon and they will attack the village. I suggest making preparations before the battle.”

“You like her”, Hue teased the other Warden as they walked up the pathway to the tavern. Trying to glare at Hue but failing, Alistair couldn’t help the blush painting his face once more when Hue and Leliana chuckled at him. Thankfully, their new friend had stayed behind at the Chantry with Morrigan and Sten; those two felt that fighting in the battle was more than enough effort on their part. Of course that meant that the two companions with him could tease him to their hearts’ content and sure enough, it started.

“You really aren’t going to drop this are you?”

“Absolutely not!” Alistair groaned which only caused Hue’s laughter to become louder.

“There’s nothing wrong with it Alistair”, Leliana piped up, offering some sympathy but amusement flooded her voice, “sometimes being...enraptured by someone causes us to fumble our words.”

“Or destroy yourself with them.”, Hue wheezed out, switching his voice around to imitate Alistair and Sibylle,“Hi, I’m Alistair, I was raised by dogs, hope you’re into that. Oh my, I do love a man who's loyal and can use his tongue.” He never heard the clanging of armor, laughter aching his chest and tears threatening to spill. Which is why he couldn’t dodge when Alistair picked him up, grounding his fist into the mop of blonde hair that started screeching weird sounds. Caught between trying to yell at Alistair to let him go and laughing still, he struggled with his whole body until the human unceremoniously dropped him onto the ground.

“Okay, I believe we should give Alistair a break before he burns up”, helping the elf up, Leliana chuckled softly at the teasing. It was endearing to see the two act so close but poor Alistair really seemed like he wished for the sky to open up and strike him down. 

“Alright, alright, I’ll stop”, brushing the dirt off his armor, he throws a grin at his skeptical looking friend, “though can I say one thing Alistair?”

“And what’s that?”

“I think she found you cute.” Alistair blinked before rubbing his neck.

“Hah, hardly. Sure she’s thinking what’s the quickest way to get rid of that weird Warden”, despite the self-depreciation Hue could see a small smile work it’s way on the other’s face, “come on, let’s get prepared. We’ve got a lovely night set up with some stars, a bit of moonlight, and demons. Romantic, isn't it?”

As if on cue, once night fell he could see a mass of torches marching from the castle gates in the distance. Traversing the bridge like a dragon’s flame rolling across the cliffs. Screams and the town bell rang loudly in the village below as everyone readied themselves, the doors to the Chantry shut tight. Sitting on the cliff pathway next to the windmill, they waited for this army of darkness to greet them, each person with their weapon at the ready. 

Breathe in, breathe out. Arrow readied in his bow, he closed his eyes for a moment to steady himself. He didn’t know if it was sad that he was starting to get used to this but right now there was more at stake than just defeating the darkspawn. They had to defend, all those people were depending on them with their lives and he had to make sure not one soul died. _Not again._ The screech of the first wave made his head snap up, seeing the creatures shamble down the hill in a run. His arrow flew from its perch, driving itself into the forehead of one of them, body crumbling to the ground in mere seconds. With that shot the battle was signaled and they all threw themselves at the enemy, slaughtering without abandon.

Eventually the battle made its way into town, militia and companions alike taking out their own counts of demons. They swarmed, like a kicked hive appearing from every corner and shadow to try to overwhelm them but everyone stood their ground. Luck was on their side...well, more so experience as everyone here seemed to have some degree of fighting skill tucked away. Alistair could see more weathered corpses lying in slaughtered or charred heaps amongst their feet and only a few living injured. The screech of a few undead rushing him brought him back, readying his shield only for a blast of fire and hot air to knock them all back. Heat radiated off his armor, undead flesh sizzling in piles on the ground nearby and he turned to give Morrigan a piece of his mind about throwing her magic so close to him, probably on purpose knowing her, but was met with blue eyes instead of gold.

“Are you alright? Was that too close?” Her brow creased as the Warden in front of her went rigid once more, silence passing a beat before he seemed to wake up. Forgetting he had his helmet on he smiled at her, smacking the shield against his chest in a display of bravado.

“No need to worry. I love feeling all warm and toasty when fighting evil forces of nature.” There was another pause, her eyes studying him with a quirked brow and Maker, her eyes were as blue as the sky and felt as vast. Wait, wasn’t there a battle still going on? In an instant her lips formed a smirk, cat-like eyes made him swallow.

“Oh, well, next time I’ll hit closer to help you along. Do you prefer to wear fire resistance or do you like the heat across your skin?” Words lit him up faster than that fire had, thankful she couldn’t see his face through his helmet. Maker help him, he almost dropped his damn shield again.

“No! No, that’s quite alright! I...run into the line of fire all the time, don’t need the help. Well, not literal fire which you can so...kindly...provide-oh, more demons, look at that! Excuse me!” Rushing past her he threw himself back into the fray, fighting seemed a lot easier than facing whatever he was feeling right now.

Once morning hit, and the prayers and cheers finished from their victory, the group met with Teagan next to the windmill, looking out towards the castle walls. In the cloudy strands of sunlight peeking down the building seems calm and quiet, as if nothing was even the slightest bit wrong. Hue wasn’t sure if that felt good or worse after last night’s battle, preferring if the night before didn’t feel like some hazy nightmare. His thoughts were parroted by the Bann who looked towards the castle as well, worry written plainly on his face.

“I had a plan...to enter the castle after the village was secure”, Hue looked up at him to continue, “there is a secret passage here, in the mill, accessible only to my family.”

“Why wasn’t this mentioned before?” Sibylle crossed her arms, a flicker of annoyance crossing her eyes. It seems she hadn’t been privy to much more knowledge than they had even though she’d been here longer. Teagan straightened up defensively, looking her dead-on.

“I had no idea what lurked in the castle! And I couldn’t abandon the people of the village!” She still didn’t look convinced, “And I needed your help...what if I had told you and you ran off into Maker knows what!” Ah, she started to look a bit perturbed at that but seemed to take him at his word. It was true, however, he had no reason to trust any of them outside of Alistair and the village did need the help. Well, they knew now and if they could formulate a plan they might be able to sneak in and ambush whatever or whoever was causing this mess. Red eyes snapped up as Teagan exclaimed, a woman in finery ran towards them with a guard from the castle path.

“Teagan! Thank the Maker you yet live!” Holding her chest, she breathed hard in both relief and nerves, brow creased in despair.

“Isolde! You’re alive! How did you…? What has happened?!”

“I do not have much time to explain! I slipped away as soon as I saw the battle was over and I must return quickly. And I...need you to return with me, Teagan.”, her eyes shifted before staring at the ground, fingers wringing, “Alone.”

“Uh, maybe we should all go together…”, Hue cut in, standing next to the Bann. It seemed she finally noticed there were other people besides Teagan and looked in affronted confusion, nose wrinkling up.

“What? I...who are these people, Teagan?” Alistair sighed, rubbing the back of his head as he moved more to the front of the group.

“You remember me, Lady Isolde, don’t you?”

“Alistair? Of all the...why are you here?” It was spat with enough venom that Alistair looked away, as if he always expected this reaction. Fists clenching, Hue breathed in slowly. No, he promised Alistair he wouldn’t be hitting anyone here but damn was she making this hard. They just saved this whole damn village and that’s the attitude she wanted to play? If he knew innocent lives weren’t at stake he’d tell this lady she could shove her castle right up her ass if she still had room with all the sticks in there. Instead, his eyes widened as Sibylle stepped up to the woman; as if Isolde wasn’t a noble lady but a nuisance in her eyes.

“These people just saved your village, Lady Isolde, and did so with noble intent. Truly you did not _mean_ to disrespect the very people who came to help, hmm?” There was a hush amongst the group, Alistair slack-jawed at the woman in front of him. Whether she had meant it or was simply playing lip-service to them he didn’t know but he appreciated it nonetheless. 

“They are Gray Wardens, Isolde. I owe them my life.” This time Teagan stepped forward, motioning to Hue and Alistair to drive the point home. 

“Pardon me, I...I would exchange pleasantries, but...considering the circumstances…”

“Please, Lady Isolde...we had no idea anyone was even alive within the castle. We must have some answers!”, Alistair stepped up again, seriousness making his features hard. Whatever was happening they needed to know and they needed to fix this.

“I know you need more of an explanation, but I...don’t know what is safe to tell.”, her voice cracked, looking desperately at the Bann, “Teagan, there is a terrible evil within the castle. The dead waken and hunt the living! The mage responsible was caught, but still it continues. And I think...Connor is going mad. We have survived but he won’t flee the castle. He has seen so much death! You must help him, Teagan! You’re his uncle, you could reason with him. I do not know what else to do!” Her pleas grew ever more desperate, eyes moistening with tears as her words flowed out like rushing water. From what Hue could tell it seems Connor might be her son and if he’s in danger, it made sense she was so distraught and disoriented. The idea of a child being caught in a mess of undead and death steeled his resolve that they needed to get in there as quickly as they could.

“What about Arl Eamon?” Hue’s words startled her, blinking as if her thoughts were running faster than she could catch.

“He is. He is being kept alive so far, thank the Maker…”

“Kept alive? Kept alive by what?” Teagan’s brows furrowed in confusion.

“Something the mage unleashed. So far it allows Eamon, Connor, and myself to live.” Hue saw Sibylle and Morrigan glance at each other with a knowing look, maybe they’ve already figured it out, “The others...were not so fortunate. It’s killed so many, and turned their bodies into walking nightmares! Once it was done with the castle, it struck the village! Teagan, I know you could order your men to follow me when I return to the castle. I beg you not to, for Connor’s sake!” She grew almost hysterical once more, Teagan’s eyes meeting Hue’s before addressing Isolde.

“The King is dead, and we need my brother now more than ever. I will return to the castle with you, Isolde.” Her shoulders slumped in relief, a weary smile on her face as she thanked him, “ but I need to confer with them in private before I return with you.”

“Please do not take too long! I will be by the bridge.” With that she turned on her heel, heading back to the path with her guard and Teagan let out a sigh.

“Here’s my plan. I go in with Isolde and you enter the castle using the secret passage. My signet ring unlocks the door.” Hue suddenly felt a ring in his hand, resolve plain on the Bann’s face. “I can distract whatever evil is inside and increase your chances of getting in unnoticed. What do you say?”

“Or you could be killed…”

“What choice do either of us have? If your business with Eamon is important, you’re going to have to go inside to find him”, Hue wanted to snap back that wasn’t the reason they were going in, that they wanted to truly help but the Bann kept going, “Ser Perth and his men can watch for danger at the castle entrance. If you can open the gates from within, they can move in and help you. If you choose not to go then it will be up to me to do what I can. Whatever you do, Eamon is the priority here. If you have to, just get him out of there. Isolde, me, and anyone else...we’re expendable.”

“Like hell you are!” Teagan startled at how loud the elf could be, anger sharpening the smaller man’s features, “I’m not leaving anyone in there to the mercy of those bastards! So don’t you say anyone is expendable!” Red eyes filled with a fire that burned of determination and rage, an unspoken promise lingering in the air between the two men. He had thought the elf formidable but he did not know them, had no connection to them or this village and yet he was angry for them. Selflessness in this size was a rare thing to see, confidence breathed into the human who reached out and shook Hue’s hand.

“You are indeed a brave soul, I will hold you to that. Allow me to bid you farewell...and good luck.”, with a nod Teagan moves past the group, head held high as he makes his way to the castle and unknowable danger. The ring in Hue’s hand felt heavier the further away he got but clenching it tight in his hand, he looked towards his companions. No words had to be spoken, everyone seemed to know what was at stake and they followed him into the windmill and to the path below the earth.

The path was dark save for the light Sibylle provided in hand; narrow and solid he could smell nothing but earth as they ventured further down. It seems nobody has had to use this in quite some time but odd that Isolde did not escape through here with her son at least. She surely had to have known this existed, it was obviously an escape path. Time seemed almost non-existent in the creeping darkness, had it been minutes or more now? Either way they finally saw cracks of light up ahead but the smell was anything but pleasant. Pushing through they found themselves inside a stone room, the smell of moisture and death lingering in every crevice. What kind of room was this supposed to be, storage? 

“Ah, the dungeon”, Alistair piped up, well that answers that question, “I locked myself in a cage once, when I was a child. For an entire day. Ahh, good times.” Wait..what?

“And sadly for us you did not stay there.” Alistair scoffed at Morrigan’s reply, leaving Hue with a quizzical look. 

“How is being locked in a cage a good time?” Eyes went to him, ah, he said that outloud and Alistair opened his mouth to speak but Sibylle just chuckled. 

“It depends on what you’re being punished for I imagine”, Confusion still graced the elf’s features but he did have to admit, it was funny seeing Alistair’s face contort with embarrassment, going bright red even in the dark. 

“Ah, got me. I am a fool for punishment it seems.” Clearing his throat Alistair threw open the door, looking almost relieved to see undead raise their weapons at them. They made quick work of this group, littering the floor as Hue’s eyes went over the barred doors. So this is what a dungeon was to keep their criminals captive, if the foul air didn’t make someone want to repent he was sure being stuck down here for a while would do it. One could imagine after a while of nothing but stone and the occasional rat that a man would go mad, maybe even hear voices.

“Hello? Who’s there?” Yea, kind of like that. Wait. Following the voice he found a human in robes looking out at him, eyes pooling relief to see someone other than a corpse shambling about. “You don’t look like the Arlessa’s guards. Are you from outside?” Quickly he was joined by his companions, Sibylle moving to the front with a startled grimace as her and the caged mage stared at each other. Acknowledgement hit them fast.

“Sibylle?!”

“Jowan?!”, her pitched voice moved to a growl as fire lit her eyes, hands grabbing onto the bars as the man backed up, “ You! Give me a damn good reason not to light you up! You have five seconds.”

“No! You don’t-!”

“5...4…”

“I was hired to come here!”, Any composure she had was gone, replaced with a burning anger that Hue backed up a little from. He had seen her use fire magic in battle but she seemed to almost radiate it from her body with how cross she was. It was...overwhelming to say the least, hair standing on end and the mage in the cell looked pretty thankful bars were between them.

“You know him?”

“He’s from the circle too”, she explained slowly, eyes still fixed on the mage but regained some of her usual grace, “he escaped which would have been no skin off my nose but he used me to escape! Me, Jowan, I trusted you! I defended you every step of the way and I had to pay the price for your bullshit! Me and your jilted lover, which by the way, she got sent off you selfish prick!” Her hands rattled the bars once more, eyes ablazed and he cowered before her.

“So..templars punish even those who associate with apostates I see”, Morrigan sniped, looking over at Alistair who just glared back.

“If they’re blood mages..yes”, Sibylle’s words created a silence that sucked all noise from the air, everyone’s eyes turning to the imprisoned mage, “do not tell me this is your doing.”

“It’s not! I swear, these creatures appeared while I was down here!”

“And? Why were you imprisoned?”

“I…”, he hesitated, hands wringing themselves with nerves, “I was hired by Teyrn Loghain’s men to poison Arl Eamon. Loghain promised with Eamon gone he could help the circle, help us!” His pleas seemed to fall on deaf ears, her face turned away with a complicated look.

“You...You poisoned the Arl?!” Alistair quickly came up to the bars, fury making his clenched fists shake. Loghain had thought to murder yet another member of his family, blood boiling with this new knowledge.

“Yes, I’m sorry”, his eyes were still on Sibylle but she refused to look at him, “I was hired as a tutor for their son. Teach him a little magic and keep him out of the tower, hide him you know.”

“Connor? Connor’s a mage?”

“Why would he be hidden?” Finally Hue spoke up, confused at this whole complicated mess but they needed answers...reasons.

“If Connor were known to be a mage he would be given to the circle and he’d also have to give up his title and any claim to the Arling. Arl Eamon would have sent him but Isolde”, he sighs heavily, “She’s deeply religious and was probably ashamed.”

“Ashamed of magic?”, Alistair nodded, “that seems dumb, kid can’t help he’s born a mage. Besides, why would you strip someone’s life away just because of how they’re born?” Alistair wanted to explain that this was just how it was, that the Chantry made the rules and how magic was made to serve man and all that but he couldn’t. For once, he seriously considered that maybe Hue was right on that point...it wasn’t like mages chose to be born mages and many probably wouldn’t if they could, considering how most had to live. Sibylle seemed to come back from her thoughts, eyeing Hue from the corner of her eye before glaring back at Jowan.

“So it is a demon then, Connor might be the source…”

“He can barely cast a minor spell--never mind something more powerful. At least, not intentionally. I was only to teach him enough so he may hide his talents.”

“Unless he inadvertently tore the Veil…”, she rubbed the bridge of her nose, a heavy sigh on her lips, “I’ll take care of this but this is the last mess of yours I am cleaning up.” She did not deign to give him another look, retreating from the bars to move out of his sight. Some of the party went with her, leaving Hue with the flustered blood mage.

“Am I...being left here? I want to make this right, afterwards I will take my punishment but I do not wish to leave things as they are.” Hue cocked his head, looking to where Sibylle was going then back.

“You really wanna help?”, Jowan nodded and Hue picked the lock easily, despite the look of protest Alistair held, “then help us. If I see you making it worse or a run for it, I’m putting an arrow through your head, we clear?” Another nod and they were off, catching up to the rest of the party and up the dark stairs to what evil lay within the castle walls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So now comes the part of the shipping tags for Alistair, maybe some people were curious about that. Sibylle was actually my mage playthrough of origins but I liked her enough that I just ended up making her another companion here in the fanfic since I felt Hue was my canon Warden. Which means she is not, in fact, a warden, just a pretty mage with a tendency towards fire spells.


	11. First Impressions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “There's nothing sexier than confidence, and nothing dumber than over-confidence." - Micheal Makai

Standing at the lake's edge Hue breathed in the cool night air, wind gently tousling hair as stars rippled on the water. As if they were glowing fish flitting along the mirror surface. In the shadows of clouds stood the island tower, imposing in its height but with a feeling of loneliness. His idle thoughts trailed to what it would be like to live there, to never leave there...to remain inside and rarely feel the grass beneath his feet, the wind cooling his skin. Sounds of leaves gently playing their tune overhead, the chittering noise of an animal traveling through brush for its next meal or shelter. Without freedom...the thought alone suffocated his very soul, like ropes tightening across his body...threatening to cut off his blood, his air. Maybe if he had never known it he would not desire it so but even still, could that be called a life? 

Whether he thought so or not was irrelevant, they were here to enlist the mages’ help to save Connor. The others were in the tavern behind, taking in what little rest they could after their travels here. It hadn’t been easy. Sibylle’s guess that Connor had been the one possessed was the right one, forced into the presence of a child whose face twisted in hellish delight. Not a face someone so young should ever sport. When the demon realised they were there to stop them, they sent a controlled Teagan and guards after the group, running to hide further in the castle. It didn’t take long to knock them out, setting Teagan’s mind back. Isolde begged them to save Connor, to free him from the demon now housed in his soul. Which seemed like an impossible task to him except…

Jowan had spoken up, offering his services to bring a mage into the Fade. There they could defeat the demon’s hold and free the boy without harming him. Of course it required a lot of lyrium and mages which they were short on but he could still perform...with blood magic. A willing sacrifice to die for Connor, to save him. Isolde immediately jumped at the chance...anything to save her son but Sibylle had stepped up. With a slap across the blood mage’s head, she took command of the situation easily, informing the group they could get the needed lyrium and mages at the Circle of Magi. It would be a week’s trip but Teagan and Alistair both agreed it was the better choice. Nobody had to die. Decision made, they left Jowan and Teagan to watch the boy and quickly headed towards the Circle, taking rest only when they really needed to.

“Ah, what a picturesque view. The whole imposing tower on the lake really must do wonders for tourism.”, a lean figure plopped down next to him, stretching his arms above his head and throwing a grin his way. Another odd bump in their road had been this man; Zevran. Odd how it was just two days ago but seemed more distant. The elf sat close by, breathing in the same air but chatted away about...anything really. It was like him and Alistair had this need to fill silence because the silence scared them for some reason. Not that Hue minded, listening to Zevran prattle on was relaxing in its own way, ironic since the man had tried to kill him. Crimson eyes looked over the other once more, taking in tan skin and brown eyes filled with as much mirth as his lips were. Wheat-coloured hair was tucked behind his ears, laying gently along the back of his neck. It stood in contrast against dark skin and the weathered green and brown of his armor, like the strands had soaked up lots of sun. Not gold like Sibylle's but it was still pretty in his eyes and looked soft. Another striking feature (which he had a lot of Hue mused) was the black tattoo along the left side of his face. It started at the end of his left brow and curved down in smooth lines along his cheek and ending at his jawline. Just one of others on his body, Zevran had said with a wink when Hue asked about it. It made him think back on how they met...

Zevran waited by the upturn cart, twirling an arrow between his fingers to pass the time. The other Crows hidden, checking their own weapons or idling about but eyes firmly on the path ahead. His job this time was rather simple; eliminate the stray Wardens and any who travel with them. Far be it from him to question why someone would want to kill off Wardens or hire this many Crow to do so, a job called for the best and that was why he was here. Luckily they had to wait no further as their bait walked up the path with the group in tow, a smile on her face that mirrored his. Amber eyes locked on to the red ones, suspicion turning to recognition but it was too late. With a signal of his hand, the group was surrounded by Crows and a log pushed to block their exit. It was fight or die. Angry red met him once again but this time he had pulled out his bow, arrow aimed right at the elf’s head.

“The Gray Warden dies here!” 

With that sentence the battle was set, arrow released straight at Hue who...caught it without blinking and pulled out his own bow. Oh, shit...that was actually kind of sexy. Wait. The arrow that was meant to end the gray warden was now embedded in the cart next to his head, making him realise he was _severely_ at a disadvantage with long range. No worries, he can close the gap. Pulling his daggers out, he gave them a twirl before rushing towards the shorter elf, dodging a few more arrows. Screams and explosions created a symphony to their fight and he swung both down above the other. Alas, the elf had thought to use his bow to block. It was a stalemate, he tried to kick the other in the chest but the slippery archer jumped back, dragging him along by the blades. When the other moved to retaliate Zevran also dodged, stumbling them both but eyes never left the other. Okay, he’s got this, he’ll simply sweep the other’s legs out and get him to the ground. Easy enough.

Or so he thought, what he hadn’t expected was the other man to let go of the bow, making him stumble forward. In mere seconds his blades hit armor and a forehead crashed into his, blurring his vision for the first shot. Another crack and it grew dark, body losing momentum as he crashed to the ground in a heap. The last thought that raced through his mind was what in Thedas did Wardens eat to have such hard heads?

He wasn’t sure how long he was out and honestly, he was pretty sure by this point he was dead. So when his eyes fluttered open he didn’t expect to see curious ruby-like eyes staring down at him. Hair in the colour of dandelion covered some of his face but it was close enough to his that Zevran could make out every inch. From the tanned skin marked with curving green tattoos, Dalish in nature now that he thought of it, to the sloping of the nose close to his. Hair stood up in places, poofed out in others but also cupped a handsome face. It looked soft as well as lips that were drawn in a rather charming frown. Close enough to see sweat gathered on smooth skin, the string of muscles on his neck taunt as he looked over the felled assassin. Huh. Maybe he did die after all.

“Mmm...what? I...oh.” Blinking again the sensation of pain firmly made itself known in his head, ah, “ I rather thought I would wake up dead. Or not wake up at all, as the case may be. But I see you haven’t killed me yet.” His voice came out strained, not missing the snort of a laugh from the other.

“Nah, decided I wanted to torture you first.” That voice was...rather rough for such a youthful face. Gritty but not that deep and the grin was rather cheeky, baring teeth in a teasing manner. Huh, interesting.

“Oooh, so you kept me around to have a bit of fun, did you? Hmm.”, he grinned back before lifting up on his elbow with a grunt, “But the purpose behind torture is usually to interrogate, yes? In that case, despite the potential for fun, perhaps I’ll save you a bit of time and get right to the point.” Now that he was sitting up properly he gave the other elf sitting on his haunches another once over. Unfortunately the armor kept any illusions of his physique a mystery...ah, such a shame.

“Oh?”

“My name is Zevran. Zev to my friends. I am a member of the Antivan Crows, brought here for the sole purpose of slaying any surviving Gray Wardens. Which I have failed at, sadly.”

“Which I’m happy about.”

“Haha, I suppose you would be, yes.” Curious eyes kept trained on him, tilting his head a little as if trying to figure him out. Like a dog cocking their ears, cute.

“What are Antivan Crows?”

“They’re an order of assassins out of Antiva, highly respected and highly dangerous.” The pretty red-head behind the elf cut in but that only seemed to make the warden more visibly excited.

“You came all the way from Antiva?”

“Not precisely. I was in the neighborhood when the offer came. The Crows get around, you see.” A hum was his response, the unfiltered look of curiosity made him want to laugh. He had just tried to kill this man, failed of course, but honestly he should be showing more anger or caution about this.

“Why are you telling me everything?” At this innocently said question Zevran had to laugh.

“Why not? I wasn’t paid for silence. Not that I offered it for sale, precisely.”

“Aren’t you at least loyal to the people paying you?”

“Loyalty is an interesting concept. If you wish, and you’re done interrogating me, we can discuss it further.” Shifting to a more comfortable position he didn’t fail to see how curiosity seeped further in, making the elf lean in a bit more. Within this distance he could easily kill or kiss the man but odds were both actions would end with his life forfeit so he just settled on charm.

“I’m listening.”

“Are you actually entertaining this? He’s probably lying through his teeth Hue.” Ah, so the elf’s name was Hue, that’s an interesting name. The human in question wasn’t wrong in his caution but maybe the elf’s curiosity was too much or maybe this Hue felt he was useful somehow, either way he was given a chance and he was going to take it.

“Well, here’s the thing. I failed to kill you, so my life is forfeit. That’s how it works. If you don’t kill me, the Crows will. Thing is, I like living. And you obviously are the sort to give the Crows pause. So let me serve you, instead.” Emotions read easily on Hue’s face; surprise was the first before melting into thoughtfulness. Luckily the man seemed rather strong because being that easy to read was a quick way to get yourself killed in certain situations. Hopefully they never have to set foot in Orlais.

“Serve me huh”, he chewed on those words before speaking again, “Can I expect the same kind of loyalty?” Zevran scoffed, fake offense lacing his tone.

“I happen to be a very loyal person. Up until the point where someone expects me to die for failing. That’s not a fault, really, is it? I mean, unless you’re the sort who would do the same thing. In which case I...don’t come very well recommended, I suppose.” A chuckle exploded out of the shorter elf, breaking the rest of the tension between them.

“No worries there, I don’t expect you to die for me”, he tilts his head again, “what stops you from finishing the job later?” Ah, a fair question.

“To be completely honest, I was never given much of a choice regarding joining the Crows. They bought me on the slave market when I was a child.” Brows drawn down; sadness, pity, good...so this one had a heart, “ I think I’ve paid my worth back to them, plus tenfold. The only way out, however, is to sign up with someone they can’t touch.”

“Me.”

“You. Even if I did kill you now, they might kill me just on principle for failing the first time. Honestly, I’d rather take my chances with you.” Plus Hue was much better to look at than his previous employers which was a bonus. And he didn’t expect him to die, talk about a lucky break.

“Won’t they come for you?”

“Possibly. I happen to know their wily ways, however. I can protect myself, as well as you. Not that you seem to need much help.”, grabbing that arrow out from the air pretty much cemented that, “And if not...well, it’s not as if I had many alternatives to start with, is it?” The silence passed between them for a moment, rendering his earlier verdict of the elf being easy to read a bit moot. Honestly he had no idea what was going on behind those crimson eyes, whether this Hue would take the bait or simply determine everything he said was bullshit. Of course he was a master at keeping his cool, not showing an ounce of tension in his body as he stared back. This seemed to make the warden grin, a light chuckle passing his lips.

“You must think I’m royally stupid, huh?” Ah, so it was the latter. Which was a little irritating because he had been the most honest he’s ever been. Maybe he could double down, talk his way out of this...or whatever, what does he have to lose at this point.

“I think you’re royally tough to kill”, he grounded out before tilting his head slightly, “and utterly gorgeous. Not that you’ll respond to simple flattery. But there are worse things in life than serving the whims of a handsome man.” Shrugging his shoulders he decided to screw it all and lay out all his honest thoughts, if he’s still killed after this then it is what it is. Bored eyes flickered back to the warden’s face and ah...oh. There was no mistaking the blush that coloured the other’s cheeks, eyes wide. When their gaze met Hue turned his away, adorably flustered, clearing his throat to gain back some control over his features. Now this was definitely interesting and if things worked out, a very alluring bonus.

“What do you want in return?” Hue was trying to be serious but the tone came out in almost a pout, what an innocent soul this one was.

“Well, let’s see. Being allowed to live would be nice, and would make me marginally more useful to you. And somewhere down the line if you should decide that you no longer have need of me, then I go on my way. Until then, I am yours. Is that fair?”

“And? What can you offer?”

“I am skilled at many things, from fighting to stealth and picking locks. I could also warn you should the Antivan Crows attempt something more...sophisticated...now that my attempts have failed.”, his grin grew bigger as he went on, “I also know a great many jokes. Twelve massage techniques, six different card games? I do wonderful at parties, no?” 

“Okay, fine.” The warden raised up from his haunches, rubbing the back of his neck as he finally willed away the last of the blush.

“What?! You’re taking the assassin with us now?! Does that really seem like a good idea?” The human’s voice pitched up, waving his hand in Zevran’s general direction in disbelief. Hue blew some of his hair up, shrugging his shoulders at the other.

“He can be useful...besides, Gray Wardens enlist all help, right?” The other warden pouted a bit, seemingly trying to find a way to argue that but coming up empty.

“I suppose...I see your point.’, he sighed in resignation, “Still. If there was a sign we were desperate, I think it just knocked on the door and said hello.” Another chuckle from Hue, looking more relaxed at the other’s reluctant approval.

“Are we truly in need of him? I find it unwise to invite the reason you must sleep with one eye open along”, a dark-haired beauty spoke up from across the way, standing next to a rather gorgeous blonde. Well...he certainly did pick the best team to join, all the women here were exceptional beauties. 

“I suppose if he did try to kill them again we could simply punish him”, this time the blonde spoke, arms slightly crossed underneath her chest. Hopefully that involved rope. A hand appeared in his view, trailing it up to his new employer...leader? Details weren’t really that important. He graciously took the hand, being pulled to his feet easy enough with a strong grip.

“I hereby pledge my oath of loyalty to you, until such a time as you choose to release me from it. I am your man, without reservation...this I swear.” Gripping the hand back just as tight, he gave a firm shake to seal their oath. However, Hue didn’t let go right away, pulling Zevran closer in with a surprising amount of force until their noses were only inches apart, voice dropping to a harsh whisper.

“You better be.” A feral grin graced his lips, soaking in Zevran’s surprised look before he let go and turned on his heel, signaling for the group to move out. Well, that was probably more sexy than the warden intended it to be. If he placed his bets he would probably guess Hue was trying to be intimidating to get back at him for earlier, however, it definitely wasn’t intimidation Zevran was feeling.

“Hey Hue”, looking up he saw the other warden address the other, making the elf turn back to them, “earlier in that fight, you grabbed that arrow right out of the air! How did you even do that?” Oh, yes, that. That was definitely a question Zevran would love to hear the answer to as well, it had certainly burned its way into his memory. Hue went rigid, lips a thin line as his eyes went a bit wide...why was he suddenly frightened like that?

“I...I thought I was gonna die and reacted”, words forced out, nerves colouring his pitched tone, “ I have no idea how I did that.” Zevran blinked; once, twice...so it was all just pure luck? Suddenly the other Warden belted out, holding his stomach from guffawing at Hue so hard. The chain reaction was instantaneous, Hue’s nervous expression melting into his own boisterous laugh. The red-head and blonde women chuckled behind their hands, very much amused with the situation whereas the other scoffed, rolling her eyes in boredom. The qunari also did not seem to find the humour in this, rubbing the bridge of his nose but everyone could feel that any lingering tension was gone. Gone was the battle from before, the bloodthirst, the killing. Now they laughed, the Wardens making jokes at the other as the group marched forward, with their new addition of course.

Which brought his thoughts back to the elf currently sitting by his side, eyes scanning over the clear surface in thought. Hue usually responded much better to his rambling, asking questions and eyes swimming with curiosity but now he seemed...introspective. Which is an odd state for him to be in if Zevran could tell from getting to know him the past few days; Hue’s curious and energetic nature was a driving force for all of them. Though he supposed that was unfair to say...even someone as extroverted as him would have times like this, yes?

“Zevran…” The Antivan perked up, Hue’s voice loud in the stillness of the night air.

“Yes?”

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Oh? This should be good. Go ahead”, elbow on his lifted knee, he put his cheek on his fist, looking over at Hue with a grin.

“Why did you want to leave the Crows?” He knew this question was coming, it was only natural the other would be curious. It wasn’t like he made it a secret that he hadn’t wanted to stay.

“Well, now, that’s a fair question. Being an assassin, after all, is a living at least as far as such things go.”, he shrugged lightly, “I was simply never given the opportunity to choose another way. So if that choice presents itself, why should I not seize upon it?”

“But what would you rather do?” He opened his mouth before closing it again, amber eyes studying the other’s face. Honestly...he had no idea, nobody had ever asked him that before or rather, nobody cared to. What he wanted out of his life never mattered in the long scheme of the Crows and his choices...those certainly hadn't mattered. Still, why was his mind drawing up such a blank...he could lie to most anyone but Hue’s innocently spoken words gave him pause. Maybe it was because nobody had ever shown genuine curiosity of who he was before...

“Now that you mention it, I am not entirely certain”, he breathed out, looking at the lake, “I was but a boy of seven when I was purchased. For three sovereigns, I’m told. Which is a good price, considering I was all ribs and bone and didn’t know the pommel of a dagger from the pointy end. The Crows buy all their assassins that way. Buy them young, raise them to know nothing else but murder. And if you do poorly in your training, you die.”

“That sounds...awful”, his nose scrunched up, anger mixed with pity as he could see the gears turning in Hue’s head.

“Oh, I don’t know about that. The Crows who are actually good enough to survive come to enjoy some of the benefits”, leaning back on his hands, he looked up at the stars with a chuckle, “In Antiva, being a Crow gets you respect. It gets you wealth. It gets you women...and men, or whatever it is you might fancy.” His eyes moved to the side, lingering on Hue’s with that last hurried sentence.

“Ah.”

“But that does mean doing what is expected of you, always. And it means being expendable. It’s a cage, if a gilded cage. Pretty. But confining.”

“So you have no freedom…”

“My dear Warden, what is freedom anyway?” Hue turned to look at him, confusion on his face, “I suppose you have lived free with your emotions and choices and that is what you know to be so. But a bird raised in a cage only knows it’s cage, what is freedom to it other than death, yes?”

“No, a freed bird can learn to live outside its cage if it’s brave enough.”, he watched the Warden shift uncomfortably, eyes downcast, “though...I suppose it wouldn’t be fair to force it to. Is it wrong of me to think everyone deserves the freedom to choose whether to live in the cage or outside of it?” Zevran watched Hue’s gaze move to the ground, shifting his feet awkwardly in the dirt and he too felt awkward. He wasn’t quite sure how to handle Hue’s kind nature but it was nice to know that someone out in this world gave a damn.

“No, I don’t suppose it is.”, laying back on the ground, he put his arms behind his head, tracing the patterns in the sky above, “As for what I’ll do in the future...presuming that there is one...I truly can’t imagine. It might be interesting to go into business for myself, for a change. Far away from Antiva, of course. For now, naturally, I go where you go.”

“I’m happy to have you along.”

“And here I am, happy to be had! Isn’t it wonderful how things work out that way?”, his laughter carried on the wind, making the ends of Hue’s lips quirk up in a smile, “now if only I had more things I fancied this would be a remarkable night.”

“Oh, what is it you fancy?” Hue snorted, looking down at the other amused.

“I fancy many things. I fancy things that are beautiful and things that are strong. I fancy things that are dangerous and exciting”, his eyes locked onto Hue’s, smirking, “Would you be offended if I said I fancied you?” Again that beautiful blush bloomed right over his cheeks, visible even in the dark and Zevran reveled in the way Hue flustered. It was such a stark contrast, to see the usually hyperactive man turn shy with just a few well-placed words.

“Not at all…”, came the murmured reply, lips turned down in a pout, “wait...you said you fancy all of that then you said me? Does that mean you think...I’m…?”

“What? Dangerous? Strong? Handsome enough to turn heads even in a Chantry? Surely you know all this, yes?” Zevran watched as Hue gaped, eyes wide as the blush started to spread down to his neck but he wasn’t hiding his gaze now. Instead he was turned where he could stare at the Antivan openly, floundering with thoughts that he couldn’t quite get out so he simply shook his head.

“I…”

“You?”

“I just…”, clearing his throat, he rubbed the back of his neck, a rather adorable expression on his face, “...I’ve been flirted with before but...nobody’s ever said so many things like that so honestly. I mean...is it honest?” 

“I gain nothing to lie about this”, Zevran sat up, leaning in closer to the other with a smile, “besides, I know what I like and rather be honest about it. Life is too short to hide away like a cloister sister.”

“Hmmm...is everyone in Antiva like this?” 

“Antivans are passionate by nature, yes, but I like to think I have an extra special something, hmmm?”

“Yea, you do”, Hue smiled back, shyness completely erased as he laid his chin on his knees, “you’re fun to be around Zevran and handsome too. I’m glad you sucked at killing me.” Cheekiness lit up crimson eyes as Zevran laughed, head thrown back in genuine mirth.

“I’m talented in many things but I could-”

“Suck well if given the chance?” 

“You know me so well already.” Hue slapped Zevran gently on the thigh before both men dissolved into laughter. Tonight had been rather educational to say the least, now he knew his Warden was of a similar persuasion. Of course he’ll wait and see for more information but it would be an excellent opportunity between all the darkspawn and the killing if they could escape the world with a bit of fun. He’d love to see what other wonderfully open expressions the other could make in the right situations.

“We should join the others”, with a helping hand, he stood up and watched Hue walk to the tavern, staring very openly at his backend. Now if only he could convince the other to ditch the bulky armor for something much more...fitting.

Back in the tavern Hue joined up with the rest of his friends, sitting next to Alistair as Leliana was reciting yet another tale. He watched her eyes light up, showing such passion for the stories she weaved beautifully. Maybe one day there’d be tales of them and their adventures...hah, as if. Of course that’s not what he was there for, tapping Alistair on the shoulder to get his attention. Zevran came to sit nearby, listening to their lovely bard but not above eavesdropping on the two Wardens across from him.

“Here”, digging through his bag, he pulled out what looked like a pendant, handing it over.

“This...This is my mother’s amulet.”, Alistair handled it carefully, looking it over this way and that with awe, “ it has to be. But...why isn’t it broken? Where did you find it?”

“I found it when we were in Redcliffe castle”, he continued, ignoring the scolding the other was about to give, “in the study. Was trying to find some sort of handy explanation but found that instead.”

“The arl’s study?”

“Yea.”

“Then he must have...found the amulet after I threw it against the wall. And he repaired it and kept it?”, confusion creased his brows as he slowly turned it in his hands, “I don’t understand, why would he do that?”

“You probably meant more to him than you think”, Hue stole the tankard in front of Alistair, taking a swig as the human was engrossed with his thoughts. If he stared any harder he might just set the thing on fire.

“I...guess you could be right. We never really talked that much, and then the way I left…”, a shaky sigh left his lips before he shook his head, looking at Hue with fondness, “ Thank you. I mean it. I...thought I lost this in my own stupidity. I’ll need to talk to him about this. If he recovers from his… _when_ he recovers, that is. I wish I’d had this a long time ago.”

“That’s what I’m here for, to help with your stupidity”, Alistair snorted at that, watching Hue’s grin grow as he drank.

“Did you actually remember me mentioning this?”, a nod from the elf, warmth blossoming in his chest, “Wow. I’m more used to people not really listening when I go on about things.”

“Huh? Sorry, did you say something?” An elbow met Hue’s side and he laughed, drinking the rest of the tankard before slamming it down. Zevran watched intently over his own drink; the playful, almost boyish nature of the two wardens. One wouldn’t imagine that these two were the only ones around who could stop this Blight but a childish nature is much more preferable to a leader who cares for no one. Which Hue cared, too much in his opinion, but he supposed that’s what the rest of them were here for. Taking care to protect that “flippantly careless nature” as Morrigan so lovingly called it.

“Hey! Hue, that was my drink!” He laughs when Hue jumps up out of his chair, moving across the table over to him with a wink to escape Alistair’s indignant tone. Things were going to be very, _very_ interesting indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, here he is, finally! Zevran! It only took me, what, 11 chapters? I wanted to keep the flow close to the game but still bring him in a little early. I also had a lot of fun ideas for the initial meeting and glad I got to use them. We also get a description of Hue finally which was my plan. The way I write is more character-focused on their thoughts and perceptions. Hue wouldn't describe himself in his head and the others don't have the level of attraction to him to point out all his features, just the main ones. Zevran, on the other hand, was perfect to describe our hero since he takes the most notice of him. Please enjoy~


	12. The Tower Redux

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "There are many who don't wish to sleep for fear of nightmares. Sadly, there are many who don't wish to wake for the same fear." - Richelle Goodwich

“You! You’re not looking to get across to the tower, are you? Because I have strict orders not to let anyone pass!” Hue blinked, they had only made it to the beginning of the short pier when a human started screaming at him. Wow, he’d forgotten what that felt like. Upon closer inspection, he could see the symbol that Templars usually wear etched right on his silver-coloured chest piece. Considering this was their only way to get into the tower, he supposed they was going to have to deal with this. Nobody could ever make it easy for them, could they?

“And who are you?” 

“I am the person appointed to stop all unauthorized access to the Circle Tower. Meaning you. Because you’re not authorized.” Oh Creators, was this human serious right now?

“I need the first enchanter’s help, it’s _really_ important.”

“No! I’ve one job, and one job only, and by the Maker’s shiny gold cutlery, I will do it!”

“I’m...pretty sure your Maker doesn’t have cutlery. Do gods even eat?”

“Oh for Andraste’s...Carroll, let them in. They’re with me”, annoyance laced Sibylle’s tone as she rubbed the bridge of her nose. The tiredness in her eyes told Hue that this probably wasn’t her first time dealing with the man.

“How do I know that’s really you?” Eyes squinted, he points an exaggerated finger at her and she levels him with a look that would make most men sweat.

“I hope you aren’t thinking of testing me”, his mouth opened to speak again but she cut him off, “ask yourself if you're curious about the bottom of the lake."

“Right. That’s you.”, he withdrew his finger but still didn’t move out of the way, “ Greagoir would be upset with me if I let you in. Wait...he’d probably be upset if I didn’t let you in. Good point. Shall we go?” Turning towards the boat, he didn’t see Hue giving Sibylle an amused look, voice merely a whisper.

“Takes his job seriously, huh?”

“You have no idea”, she groaned out, making her way onto the boat with the others. The ride over was mostly silent; even with the moon glowing brightly on the surface the water kept it’s ink-like darkness. Still save for the boat’s disturbance. A large stone bridge stood tall, shattered into ruins from a long forgotten time. It stretched from the earlier shore to the entrance of the tower itself though no soul was capable of using it now. Did this always use to be a mage tower or was this building something much more commonly traveled to? Or perhaps the bridge was destroyed to keep its occupants from escaping? The urge to ask gnawed at him but it felt odd with the dark shadow of the tower looming over them, forlorn...solemn...like a dark pressure growing stronger the closer they got.

The entrance of the tower was massive. Suddenly realising just how tall the building was, he leaned back facing the sky and even then he couldn’t see the top. And it was huge around too! He swore it’d take him a bit to run around the base even once and that’s if he didn’t accidently trip off the cliff. Which he shouldn’t, warned the old ferryman back at the tavern, since the lake had been used as a dumping ground for all sorts of potions. Who knows what it’d do to the unfortunate soul who managed to fall in. Not something he was keen on testing.

Inside the large doors was a different sight altogether; they entered a large half circle of a room lit with candles to combat the darkness of night. Large arches sectioned the room into different levels and templars ran to and fro, well, the ones who weren’t lying on the floor anyway. Those men were groaning in pain, the clanging of metal on stone didn’t hide the barking commands of a gray-haired man in front of them. Not a mage in sight however...wasn’t this supposed to be a mage tower?

“The doors are barred. Are they keeping people out? Or in?” Alistair whispered, words lingering in the tension that surrounded the room.

“Greagoir!”, the templar stopped shouting, looking over to the blonde mage who called out to him, “what is happening?!” She rushed from the group, confronting the man who seemed to be in charge here. The look on her face didn’t ease that gnawing feeling in Hue's gut.

“You’re back. Damn lucky you left when you did, the tower is no longer under our control.”

“What?!” Hue’s eyes darted to a large set of doors in the back of the room, clearly an entrance into the tower itself. Now though it was shut tight, blocked, and guarded by templars. Something was extremely wrong here...great.

“Abominations and demons stalk the tower’s halls.”

“How did this happen?”

“We don’t know. We saw only demons, hunting templars and mages alike. I realised we could not defeat them and told my men to flee”, he looks to the door, silent for a breath before facing her again, “the Tower is lost.”

“What about the other mages? You couldn’t get any of them out?”, her expression twists into a mixture of worry and anger, “what about…?”

“He escaped, the little bastard, so no he is not _here_ ”, he growled and Hue raised an eyebrow, now what was that about, “as for the others, even if some are still alive, we don’t know for how long. Nor do we know if they have not already been turned. I have sent word to Denerim, calling for reinforcements and the Right of Annulment.”

“You can’t!”, Her composure was slipping quickly, something in those words rattled her. Maybe it was time he stepped in.

“What’s the Right of Annulment?”

“It’s, well…”, Alistair started, clearing his throat, looking uncomfortably to the side.

“The Right of Annulment gives us templars the authority to neutralise the mage Circle. Completely.” 

“He means kill all the mages”, The darkness in her voice made Hue's head snap up, looking from Sibylle to Greagoir in shock. That had to be some twisted joke, right? However her face showed no sign of anything but smothered anger, remnants of her blaze kept on lockdown in front of these soldiers. The cold realization broke over him, eyes wide, they were seriously planning to kill anyone left regardless.

“You’d murder people on a _maybe?!_ ”, he growled, eyes ablaze, “you don’t even know if they’re all dead or not!”

“He’s right! What about the children?! The ones left?! You cannot do this Greagoir, they are not all dead!”

“Sibylle, this situation is dire. There is no alternative, everything in the tower must be destroyed so it can be safe again.”, his voice raised in command, a finality to shut her down, “No one could have survived those monstrous creatures. It is too painful to hope for survivors and find...nothing.”

“Then I’ll look for survivors”, both Sibylle and Greagoir turned to Hue, determination steeled on his face, “I’ll go in and look for them.”

“I assure you, an abomination is a force to be reckoned with, and you will face more than one.” Greagoir scoffed, looking this tiny elf over as if he’d lost his mind. If his own templars couldn’t deal with the demon horde, what chance did this boy think he had.

“I can handle it”, he shrugged and the templars brows furrowed, “besides, it’s the right thing to do.”

“I’m going with him”, Sibylle piped up, anger quickly replaced with graceful confidence. Greagoir wanted to argue with her again, that it was a fool's errand and she'd be throwing her life away. His tongue stilled, a sigh escaping his lips, there was never a way to talk her out when she made up her mind. Stubborn child that she always was.

“A word of caution then...once you cross that threshold, there is no turning back. The great doors must remain barred. I will open them for no one until I have proof that it is safe.”, his arms cross, glancing over the group before leveling on Sibylle once again, “I will only believe it is over if the first enchanter stands before me and tells me it is so. If Irving has fallen...then the Circle is lost, and must be destroyed.”

Leliana and Sten stayed behind this time; Sten wanted no part of whatever foul magic was plaguing the halls. Leliana whispered she would watch the men, make sure that Greagoir kept his word when they returned and that they did not destroy the tower as soon as they went in. He was grateful for that, with Leliana and Sten watching their backs the rest of them ventured through the doors, hearing them close with a bang that reverberated through the halls. It was...eerie, there was a foul air that soaked into the stone and set the hairs on his neck on end. Dead templars littered the ground, some reaching out towards the door in what had been a vain grasp at life. The smell of blood mixed with something he wasn’t familiar with, stains dark on the floor and walls as he peered further into the hall.

“As I recall, shutting the door and throwing away the key was definitely the templar “Plan B””, Alistair elongated the b sound, a weary grin on his face that wasn’t shared with the rest of the group.

“And Plan A was to slaughter hapless mages merely caught in the fray. Truly a plan of such an _illustrious_ order. How proud you must be of their fine work.” Morrigan sneered, voice dripping with venom and Alistair’s face deflated.

“Really? Now?”

“Yes, really. Now.”

“So you _are_ a templar...”, Sibylle interrupted them, startling Alistair who paled. Brown eyes met curious blue and he worried what she must think of him now. Especially after hearing that her fellow mages were going to be purged after already dealing with abominations. Wow, yea, he might hate himself too if he was in that position.

“Ex-templar. I was trained but never did the Rite”, he looked shy, almost like he expected the floor to help him, “Duncan conscripted me into the Wardens before that could happen and here I am.”

“He gets jumpy with magic sometimes but he doesn’t think mages are bad”, Hue spoke up, giving Alistair a lopsided grin, “kind of a shit templar from what I’ve seen.”

“Hey!” Hue chuckles leaving Alistair confused if he was supposed to feel insulted or not but his eyes fell back towards the other mage. She was a circle mage, obviously used to Templars but that didn’t mean she liked them. It wasn’t as if he kept it a secret and she seemed to have caught on during their travels, but now…

“Are you worried I’d suddenly come to hate you?” His thoughts were voiced by the same woman he was thinking about, red filling his cheeks. Ah, seems he was caught.

“No-I, well...we are on the same team. I did not want this to be a problem”, his stuttering seemed to make her relax, early tension seeped away from her shoulders.

“Are we a problem?” She pointed to herself then Morrigan.

“No, of course not…”, His words spilled out but then he paused, face contorting, “okay, Morrigan’s a problem but not because she’s a mage.”

“I am no blubbering fool who trips over his own tongue or wallows in his tears, so no, I am not the problem.”

“Guys! Later!”, Hue raised his voice, drawing their attention away from their squabble to the two elves who had walked further on to the next room. Zevran just seemed to chuckle as the humans caught up, Alistair looking a bit embarrassed and Morrigan perturbed. Only their group could make a mission into a demon-infested mage tower seem funny.

Except for a few interesting notes Hue pocketed and a bunch of dead mages and templars, nothing was really of interest in the mages’ dorms. Well, the interesting part was that despite their caution, not a single demon or abomination had come to attack them. Which left the door at the end of the hall as their last stop. Caution was thrown out when Hue heard children screaming in horror, slamming the door open. Inside a larger room he saw mages young and old cowering in fear as a demon lumbered toward them; molten fire and rock making up it’s bulbous body as it slid across the floor. Within seconds of reaching for his bow, the demon was hit with ice, growling in pain as the frost engulfed it’s body. Slowly it sank into the floor, leaving behind mere smoke as the mage in front of them holstered her staff.

“Wynn!” The older mage turned, looking at their group in surprise.

“Wynn? What are you doing here?” As happy as Hue was to see a familiar face it was off-set by the task at hand and the weary, cautious faces of each mage in the room. So there were people alive...the thought made his fists clench.

“Sibylle, I see you are back. And you’ve brought the Gray Wardens with you”, her voice was a little strained, almost tired, “why are you here? The templars would not let just anyone by.”

“I needed to get the mages' help.”

“He convinced Greagoir to let us in”, Sibylle explained further, putting a hand on Hue’s shoulder, “but we have a problem. They’re going to invoke the Right of Annulment if this situation isn’t solved.”

“I feared that might be his decision. What else could they do?”, her weariness grew, a sigh escaping her lips, “so Greagoir thinks the Circle is beyond hope. He probably assumes we are all dead. They abandoned us to our fate, but even trapped as we are, we have survived. If they invoke the Right, however, we will not be able to stand against them. ”

“Not on my watch”, With a grin he pounded a fist to his chest, “we’ll take care of the monsters and get you all out of here!” Wynn studied him for a moment, looking to Sibylle for an answer but the blonde just gave a light-hearted shrug, smiling at the older woman. It seemed the young man was sincere, confident that he would clean up this whole “mess” and help everyone out. It was a confidence that inspired her own, standing up a bit straighter.

“If you are here to kill abominations, let me help you.”

Past the barrier that Wynn had been holding was where they truly met horror. Darkspawn were grotesque, smelling of rot and death and skin twisting over inhuman shapes. Abominations were...worse. There was no form left of the human or elf that it once had been, instead purplish gnarled flesh stretched over sickly bodies with bulbous protrusions along their spine and shoulders. They snarled and growled the same as their blighted counterparts but the worst thing to Hue was their eyes. Where darkspawn had none, only dark voids where pupils should be, more beast than man, abominations still had their soul-filled eyes. Piercing, wild, ripe with madness but alert; as if to remind him that there was still a person trapped inside their flesh prison. 

His stomach churned like a tempest at this knowledge.

Luckily, after clearing out the library, they chose to look around before moving on. To catch their breath, though no one wished to admit it. There was also the hows and whys they were missing; he’s pretty sure this isn’t a common occurrence in the circle. That’s when he heard the two circle mages start to speak, curiously looking in their direction.

“How did this happen Wynn?”, Sibylle’s voice was soft but there was no hiding it within the deathly silence of the room.

“It all started when I returned from Ostagar. I survived...barely.”, the older mage sighed, “I was in no state to travel, so I stayed there to recuperate and help the wounded. Uldred, on the other hand, left for the tower almost immediately. When I finally returned here I found that Uldred had all but convinced the Circle to join Loghain, the man who nearly destroyed us all.”

“I never did like that man…” Wynn chuckled at the disgusted face Sibylle made.

“I cannot fault the Circle though, Uldred had a persuasive argument, and how could they have known what happened in Ostagar?”

“And what did he tell them exactly?”

“The alliance with Loghain would have been to the Circle’s advantage; according to Uldred, once Loghain was in power, he would order the Chantry to give us more freedom.”

“Utter horseshit!”, Sibylle scoffed, crossing her arms. Hue saw Alistair’s head snap up in surprise and resisted the urge to chuckle.

“Well, I told First Enchanter Irving what Loghain did on the battlefield. I revealed him for the traitorous bastard he is”, Wynn also spat, damn, the man in question must be a pretty vile person if both ladies were cursing his name, “ Irving said he would take care of it. He called a meeting to confront Uldred, but something must have gone wrong. I emerged from my quarters when I heard the screams. They were coming from the meeting room, and it wasn’t long before I saw the first abomination, running down a mage. It deteriorated quickly then.”

“Do you think…?”

“It must have, though I don’t know for sure. The creatures came from that direction, as far as I could tell.”

“You think this Uldred guy started all this?”, he finally spoke up, causing the two women to look at him, “What kind of person is he?”

“Uldred? It’s uncharitable of me to speak this way, but I never liked him”, Wynn started, nose wrinkled like she smelled something rotten, “He was a squirrelly, twitchy sort of person.”

“That’s putting it kindly, he was a right bastard. Only cared for himself”, Sibylle finished off, brows drawn in disgust, “Never mentored the apprentices, though I’m sure they thanked the Maker for that blessing.”

“Oh I’m sure he has some redeeming qualities”, Wynn snarked which caused the blonde to roll her eyes, “He probably has a perfectly good reason for not displaying them.”

“Sounds like a guy who could use a good punch in the face”, Hue grinned, punching his fist into his other hand. Sibylle chuckled behind her hand, even Wynn laughed softly at the implication.

“You have no idea. Let’s not keep him waiting then.”

Memories flooded in like a dam broken, the higher they climbed in the circle the more abominations they ran into it. Bodies literally piled the floor as they slashed and hacked their way through each room, each hallway just to move further and further into hell. If the abominations weren’t enough they also ran into quite a few blood mages that didn’t seem to get the memo on ask first then attack. Needless to say death was leaving a trail behind them while lumps of...what he could only describe as slimy flesh clung to the floors and walls like moss. His heart raced, the feeling of climbing those stairs in that dreadful tower in Ostagar to each new floor of life-draining battles was crystal clear in his mind. Suddenly he felt pain in his shoulder, his chest, saw Alistair lying broken on the ground as the deafening roar of hordes rushed into the room. Putrid smells choked him out, roars and screeches echoed in his ears, vibrating his vision as the floor started to weave and wobble beneath him. He saw Alistair...Morrigan, Leliana, Sten, Sibylle, Zevran, Wynn lifeless on the floor caked in their own blood and guts. Tamlen's screams echoed over and over, accusing him, glass shattering but he couldn't rip his eyes away, couldn't move, _couldn't do anything!_

“Easy there, my friend”, a hand jerked him out of his thoughts, splashing cold reality on him as Zevran’s face came into view. He swore he could feel the warm hand through his armor, the soft, deep voice of his new friend chasing away the screams and horrors. Blinking the last remnants of nightmare away he looked around the group, each person with different expressions of worry. He hadn't realised he had started to pant heavily, clutching the wall for a solid hold as his mind overwhelmed him. His hands trembled, that...had never happened to him before. Creators...how could he let mere memories weaken him like this?!

“I’m fine”, sadly his voice wasn’t convincing, the shakiness of it pretty much said he wasn’t fine but he rolled his shoulders back, trying to play it off.

“You’ve gone pale, are you alright?” Alistair stepped up, reaching out to his friend but Hue lightly pushed his hand away, becoming steady on his feet once more.

“It’s fine, don’t worry. We have to finish this”, he left no room to argue, making his way to the front of the group once more. Unbeknownst to him each pair of eyes was on his back, curious and with some degree of worry. Something about this place shook the elf to his core and that brought a new level of caution to the group. Caution that served them well when demons began to appear alongside the abominations. The icing on the cake was also the possessed templars, their armor and shields annoying to get through. He threw himself into defense with Alistair then, fighting occupied his mind, fighting allowed him to not think about his friends dead on the floor.

He could control fighting, he could keep them alive.

Wynn tried to stop him a couple of times with the excuse of healing his wounds but he kept side-stepping her. That look on her face was too familiar...Ashalle wore the same one when she worried for him. He felt ungrateful ignoring the older woman's attempts to care about him but he couldn't stop, not now, not when people were depending on them, when the tower could fall from abominations or templars alike. There was no time for his petty fears, not when real danger threatened them around every corner, when helpless people looked to him. She hadn't been the only one either…

Alistair tried to get him to talk in the cleared out rooms but Hue fed him excuse after excuse. And Alistair knew they were excuses, the human's face sank each time his friend blew him off. There was just no way, Hue knew if he spoke of it it would make it real, break the thin barrier he built to hold it back, reduce him to useless. He couldn't _be_ useless, couldn't afford it...weakness wasn't a luxury he had and what good would it do for him to break down in the middle of this blasted tower?! No, absolutely not. The others also held worried looks but didn't breach the topic or even try to ask him, which he was thankful for.

Of course he didn't miss the way they gathered around him tightly in a fight. Or linger closer when they scoured a room of its contents. If they weren't going to say anything he wouldn't either. Stuffing a black-covered book into his bag they gave a once more over of the room before heading back out. Presumably to more fighting but further up he would never have guessed in a million years what true nightmare would await them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was planning to have the whole tower/fade in one chapter but it felt better this way. I wanted to explore how Hue felt especially since it hadn't been that long since Ostagar and he hasn't exactly been dealing with his feelings and thoughts. The Warden definitely sees some shit. Next chapter will be the dreaded Fade level.


	13. Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “The worst wounds, the deadliest of them, aren't the ones people see on the outside. They're the ones that make us bleed internally.” ― Sherrilyn Kenyon

Heavy was the first thing he felt, muscle weighing him down like stones filled his body. Eyes drooped, fighting the urge to keep them closed as he sluggishly sat up. Every fiber of his being was lulling him to sleep. What was he just doing? Something told him he needed to get up, to get back to fighting. Did he really have to though? Weeks have passed since he left his clan, his home and he has done nothing but fight. Battle after battle, endless trails of death like wandering a graveyard that never ends. Running towards the end, feet pounding against stone but he never gets any closer, can never reach the exit. Is there even an end to all this? Should he just stop fighting? 

_No!_ A voice rattled his mind, pumping adrenaline through his blood. _Get up!_ There it was again, louder, echoing through his head until he was able to move. Fighting off the alien weariness he managed to get to his feet, checking his surroundings. Actually...where was he? He certainly wasn’t in the tower anymore but the structures around him, the floor underneath his feet were stone. Carved in patterns and designs he had never seen, the walls and arches looked old yet grand. Everything was caked in a hazy greenish light, persistent fog dragging the very air down. It made him tired...sleepy.

_You’re not safe, you need to move!_ Right, let’s listen to the voice in his head. Shaking the fuzzy feeling from his mind, he moved further into the building. The walls stretched high, making him feel almost insignificant. At the very end was a ramp leading up into an open air room; pillars circling around like actors upon a stage. Centered right in this place was an important figure, greeting him as his body froze in shock. Certainly he’d be more than happy to see this person once more...if that person wasn’t already dead. 

“Ah, there you are. I’m not disturbing you, am I?” The figure sounded like Duncan, looked like him right down to the minor details of his armor. Hair, beard, the aged smile he’d give Hue. The elf was sure if he reached out he could even feel the smooth, hard metal of his armor. Creators, just hearing the deep timber of the older man’s voice once more soothed the static building up in his nerves. Two other Gray Wardens took up his sides, looking over him curiously. Taking a deep breath, he reached back for his bow, drawing an arrow as pain seeped into his features.

“Nice try but Duncan is dead…” And he knew better than anyone the dead couldn’t come back, no matter how badly he wanted them to. 

“I am standing before you yet you do not believe your own eyes?”

“No, not this time…”, quickly he turned and shot the Warden mage in the heart, watching him fall before drawing another arrow on the other, “ you all smell like nothing.”

There were no dead piled at his feet this time, as soon as he had killed them their bodies vanished, melting away with the fog. The only thing left was a pedestal glowing with bright smoke wrapping around it’s thin stand, compelling Hue to touch it. As soon as he did he felt his body jolt, dragged while standing still until he was no longer in the stone structure but in a twisted landscape of veiny, sickening ground twisting and turning every which way. Putrid green sky stretched as far as he could see and in the blurry distance he saw lands floating. This wasn’t real...it couldn’t be. That’s right, he’s probably having another one of those weird Warden dreams, the sky was certainly the same colour as the last one. He’ll bolt awake in no time from some horror or warning, slowly making his way to the broken pillars with a new found ease.

“Who are you?! Where did you come from?!”, his head snapped over to see a man in robes cowering before him, eyes wide, “Are you a demon?”

“Not really, last I checked, are you?”

“No...ah, I see that you’re not. You’re like me.”, he sounded relieved, waving a hand towards the pedestal, “Congratulations on getting out of that trap.”

“Trap?"

“The demon traps everything that comes here in a dream it thinks they can’t, or won’t, try to leave. I thought I’d escaped too, but I’ve been wandering these empty, gray spaces for a lifetime.”

“Wait, wait...let’s back up a moment”, he held up a hand to stop the mage, Hue’s confusion was starting to reach its limit, “where exactly is _here?_ ”

“You don’t know?”, Hue shook his head, “I suppose you wouldn’t, you don’t seem to be a mage. We are in the Fade, specifically in the realm of a powerful demon.” He blinked, almost forgetting to breath as he slowly turned to look at the nonsensical landscape once more. This was the Fade? That place where spirits dwelled and mages got their power from? He was in the Fade?! He racked his brain, holding his head to think of how he even ended up here. This guy mentioned a demon, right? Wait...

“Who are you? Wait, are you a mage from the circle?”

“Yes, I am. My name is Niall.” Oh, wait, that name did seem familiar, he recalled when they had found one of the Tranquil that still lingered about in the tower, cleaning up the spoiled warehouse, he had definitely said that name, “I was trying to save the Circle when I encountered the Sloth demon. I expect our experiences are similar.” Sloth...wait. That’s right! He remembers running into a room with his friends; a large, nasty looking demon with a tired voice greeted them. Nobody could draw their weapons, tiredness taking over their bodies as they fell to the ground in a deep sleep. It said something about dreams, too bad the bastard didn’t account for Hue’s sense of smell.

“Owain mentioned you, he said you had something called a Litany.”

“The Litany was our weapon against the blood mages’ domination. But it’s too late. Everyone’s dead…”

“No, there are still people alive out there. If we’re standing and talking then we can still get out.” Niall watched the curious elf, feeling pity that he still clung to hope.

“This place drains you of everything...hope, feeling, life…”

“There’s always a way out.”

“No, there is no way! You see that pedestal there? I’ve studied the runes on it, runes that signify different islands of the sloth demon’s domain”, behind the mage sat another glowing pedestal, bright like a beacon in this dreary land, “ the sloth demon itself is on the center island, but you can’t get there. The five islands around the center somehow form a protective ward. I thought I was getting somewhere when I figured that out, and I went to each island in turn only to have my hopes dashed. There’s always an obstacle. You’ll see the path but unable to get to it, and it taunts you and drives you mad.”

“Could my friends be on those islands?” Niall was taken back as Hue gave him a pointed stare.

“I...I don’t know. There are many dreamers. You might find a way to reach them through the islands...if you’re lucky.”

“Then I’m going”, he started walking towards the pedestal, “I’ll defeat the demon and come back for you, okay?” Niall could only blink as the elf disappeared before his eyes, come back for him he says. Now that was a strong amount of confidence.

Weird magic and crazy Fade shit was definitely not his expertise but if he remembered that not everything was what it seems then it was easier. Transforming into different forms he had stumbled upon was an interesting experience and probably the only time he was going to understand what it felt like to use magic. It was a rush; scary and exciting! Each form pulled from an unknown substance through his veins, melting and molding his body into something else. With this he was able to get past the obstacles Niall talked about, moving around on the islands until he could get further to the end of one. He just knew that his friends were at the center of each, if he could defeat the island he could save his friends. That was the truth he held through this crazy place.

After defeating one of the so-called guardians he was able to move onto a previously blocked floating island; small in stature and right in the middle he saw...Zevran on a table. Well, tied to a table and the rope seemed to be connected to some gears, the other elf stretched from all four of his limbs. Scratching the back of his head he walked over to the scene, listening to the two men standing over his friend. This was supposed to be a dream the demon gives everyone, right? Maybe he should ask Zevran some more questions when they get out of here…

“I think I saw him flinch that time.”

“Maybe. We’ll make you scream yet, apprentice.”

“We’re not gonna go easy on you, trust me.”

“ No...I wouldn’t...nngh, wouldn’t want you to hold back. I’d be disappointed if you...did”, Zevran groaned in pain, even though his words never let up on the cheekiness. Hue could only roll his eyes at the scene, wandering over to the end of the table.

“Need some help?”

“What...what are you doing here?”, Zevran actually looked confused, looking around before back at Hue, “You’re not supposed to be...here.”

“Neither of us are, it’s time to wake up.”

“I can’t...I need to stay strong.”, he groaned again, drawing in a breath, “This is my test. I am going to be a Crow...I need to show them I can tolerate...pain.”

“Uh...you’re already a Crow though? Or was? Were? Maybe you still are?” Wow, this was confusing.

“What? That cannot be, and yet…”, amber eyes meet crimson, realization washing over the Antivan’s face, “you speak the truth? I can feel it. Is this nothing but a bad dream? A bad memory?”

“Something like that…”

“I think he’s questioning us, that’s a very, very bad thing to do”, oh right, the men standing around Zevran were still here and now they seemed to notice him. Good, he’d rather just defeat the enemy and save the day instead of more bullshit puzzles. The two men clearly underestimated how annoyed he was at the moment, ending up with arrows in most of their vitals as they disappeared into the fog. Once it was safe he went over to the table to untie the other.

“Well! That was bracing! There’s nothing like a good racking, is there?” Zevran grinned, stretching out his body as he slid off the table.

“I have...so many questions.”

“Hah, and maybe I can show you the answers...wait. Where are you going?” Hue jumped back as Zevran suddenly disappeared in a flash of light, no sign he was ever there left over. Maybe...that’s what happens when someone wakes up from the Fade? This was really starting to grate on his nerves, guess he had to keep going to find those answers out.

It became a cycle of rinse and repeat; moving onto the other islands and using previously obtained forms to finally move further in. Sten and Leliana definitely had the right idea of staying back, these dreams...nightmares were just so personal it felt like he was intruding. Guilt seeped into his skin even though he had done nothing to gain it. Morrigan had only to deal with an annoying clone of Flemeth and she seemed rather aware of where she was and what was in front of her. Honestly once he saw the dark-haired mage berating the demon clone for it’s lackluster performance he had felt such a weight lift from his chest that he laughed. Honestly laughed and while Morrigan questioned what was so funny from her predicament, he just felt such relief. Of course she was fine...of course she knew it was a demon. That’s just how smart she was. It had taken no time at all to defeat the Flemeth clone and Morrigan joined up with Zevran in the same way, bright light and without a trace.

Wynn’s had been where the guilt started. Her nightmare was of death and regret; things she could never take back, never have control over. Children...apprentices laid at her feet and she wept for them, Hue’s heart panging at the scene. Maybe it wasn’t Morrigan being intelligent, maybe the younger mage was just...disillusioned, therefore she could not believe beyond herself.

_She didn’t believe._ The voice in his head supplied, feet gingerly leading him to the older woman. Sure it’s a nightmare, a fake set of memories made to trap them, but it just felt wrong to tell her to wake up. How much of this was made-up by the demon and how much of it could be real? Morrigan had wasted no time telling him of the dangers of fear of magic and the templars. Circle mages had to live right on top of both...so how many young people did Wynn hear or even see torn down? Eventually he was able to get her to see the truth, fighting off the demons that shed the skin of children but it wasn’t like cutting a demon’s head off was going to fix her regret. 

Her smile didn’t reach her eyes and he couldn’t blame her. Imprinted on him as she disappeared into the air, leaving him with a breathless moment of doubts, anger, and guilt. Wynn’s regrets hadn’t prepared him for the scene he’d find himself in next. Where the woman had already lived through her choices and had to come to accept the life she has lived…

_...Alistair clung to the hope of a life he desperately would have given anything for._

“Hey, it’s great to see you again! I was just thinking about you, isn’t that a marvelous coincidence?” Steps were cautious as he approached a rather jovial Alistair, looking around at the scene before him. It had come to his attention that they couldn’t see the gnarled backdrop of the fade but rather whatever location the demon conjured up for them. Illusion, he was sure it was called. What bothered him though was instead of fear or shame or anger, he was met with the same happy, goofy grin Alistair would adopt in various moments.

“Alistair?”

“This is my sister, Goldanna! These are her children and there’s...more about somewhere. We’re one big, happy family!” It was off-putting how happy his friend looked...how content he seemed within this demonic sham. Moments ticked away in his head before he realised something. Unlike the rest of them who longed to rewrite a regret, fix a past mistake, Alistair’s dream was...a family. Pure and simple. No, more than that, Alistair wanted unconditional love and validation from a family that adored each other, supported each other. Something the man had never been able to have with the stories of his childhood he’d shared with Hue; how people brushed him off, tossed him away, and not once made him feel like he had a place to belong.

His heart wrung hard. True, he hadn’t had his parents around either but the clan never made him feel like an outsider, always accepted him even with his trouble-making ways. Who had Alistair had…? Up until Duncan conscripting him it had been no-one, not a sister or another kid, Alistair would have mentioned a name if there had been. He was too honest. Suddenly he remembered how the human looked when Hue brushed his hand away, walking away from his help and it made him feel sick. He had lost Duncan, the other wardens, and dangerously close to losing Eamon...who else did he have left except Hue.

And he wasn’t about to lose the fellow Gray Warden to some damn demons. Still…

“You seem happy…”

“I am!”, Alistair smiled, his tone genuinely light, “I’m happier than I’ve been in my entire life! Isn’t that strange?”

“Um...Alistair…”

“I thought being a Gray Warden would make me happy but it didn’t”, his face softened, he spoke so highly of the Gray Wardens but even he, “this does…”

“I’m overjoyed to have my little brother back! I’ll never let him out of my sight again!” Tone saturated with a sickenly sweet essence, he suddenly remembered that the demon was there. Regardless of how content Alistair was, he was in danger from this thing. Everyone else had woken up when Hue had fought their demons but something told him Alistair wouldn’t appreciate him decking his sister. Even a fake one. So...how can he fix this?

“Alistair...we really have to go.”

“I...don’t think I’ll be coming. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life fighting, only to end up dead in a pit with rotting darkspawn corpses.”

“Well I don’t either but we both took those vows”, irritation tightened his brow, glaring down his nervous friend, “everyone is relying on us. We can’t give up now...we’re the only ones who can save them!” Wrinkles formed between the taller man’s brows, scrunching up his nose. Conflict and worry twisted his face, brown eyes looking off into some distance that Hue couldn’t see. He believed in him though, knew his friend would easily do the right thing no matter how hard it was…

“Well Alistair, is your friend staying for supper?” The look Hue shot the demon could melt the steel of a fine blade but it paid the elf no mind. Alistair’s easy grin relaxed his face, as if the man had never been close to realising the truth.

“Say you’ll stay! Goldanna’s a great cook!”, he wheedled and whined at Hue but the elf only crossed his arms, anger becoming clearer, “maybe she’ll make her mince pie. You can, can’t you?”

“No! And you can’t either!”

“Wha-?”

“Were you really made for a quiet, family life?! If that’s true then why did you even bother to accept Ducan’s decision?! Why did you become a Gray Warden?! Was your resolve that shallow?!”, words left the human flabbergasted, the elf grabbing his collar and headbutting his forehead, “ The Alistair I know may act silly but he does what’s right! And if this is really what you want, get out of this nightmare and figure out if Sibylle can give you that!” That seemed to do it, Alistair’s cheeks flared up in embarrassment, denials sputtering from his lips. The dream was all but forgotten in the face of defending himself...on which topic Hue didn’t know or care.

“No! He is ours, and I’d rather see him dead than free!” No matter how many times he’s seen it now, the demons ripping out from their fleshy disguises always unnerved him. Peeling away from the fake human counterparts like a skin of a ripe fruit, it swipes at Hue in screeching anger. Dodging their frenzied swings was easy, the creature too agitated to swing properly. However the problem was the “children” always transforming, surrounding him instantly. What the demons didn’t count on though was how pissed off Hue was with them.

Anger can be one hell of an adrenaline rush.

“I can’t believe it.”, Alistair whispered out, looking at the disappearing corpses of demons, the same demons that had disguised themselves as his “family”, “How did I not see this earlier?”

“You were tricked.”

“Yes, well”, he clears his throat, blush still on his cheeks as he looks to the elf, “let’s not mention to the others how easily I was tricked. Wait...where are you going? Hey!” Before either men could blink Alistair was gone, a sigh on Hue’s lips. Just one more to go…

To be fair, he assumed Sibylle would be a lot like Morrigan, there was a feeling about the blonde mage that made him believe this. Surely she’d know they were demons and was simply waiting for the outside party to break her out. 

Well, he was sort of right. When he appeared on her island she was sat upon a chair, eyes scrunched up as she desperately held hands over her ears. A boy, probably a teen, was bemoaning his fate, whining to her for her attention but she would not give it. 

“You said if I’d been good they’d let me go out”, the whining got louder, more grating when he realised she was purposely ignoring him, “why did you lie to me?! You said they would!”

“ _Leave…_ ”, a whisper fluttered from her lips like steam in cool air, small yet commanding as she continued to keep her eyes shut. It was like she was in torment but not because of the demon. Curious. Hue took a closer look at the boy; somewhat medium length dirty, blonde hair, nose reminding him of a bird, even at a young age he was tall and gangly. It wasn’t that they looked alike though some similarities existed, there was just something about this that made Hue confused. 

Feet moved on their own, stepping closer to the scene and on the other side of the tall, teen boy was a shorter elf in robes; maybe only a bit younger than the human boy. However their features were dark...Dalish. Tattoos on tan skin, dark hair, but their eyes were striking. Unlike the boy they spoke no words, just stared at Sibylle with an unsettling gaze. Blame, anger, disgust...it was grotesque upon such a youthful face, making even him reel back.

“Sibylle…?” Honestly he didn’t think she’d hear him with how tightly her hands were but both teens stopped, looking squarely at him as her eyes opened. Emotions crashed like waves in that blue, pleading with Hue with a smile he hoped never to see cross her face again. It was too raw...too sad. It didn’t fit.

“Oh..there you are. Could you do me a favor and get rid of these? Seems we’re not allowed to break them ourselves.” 

Unlike the other nightmare islands this had been anticlimactic. Demons never got to transform as Hue shot them square in the head, putting them down at her behest. It just left a wrong feeling in his mouth watching their bodies disappear, he’d never tasted solemn before. 

“That boy...was he your family or something?”

“Hmmm...I suppose outsiders would define it like that”, she hummed, but her eyes never lifted, looking right into the rigid ground, “but I guess the easiest term is...they were apprentices of mine.” That was a lie if he ever heard one, she clearly didn’t see either of those people as just apprentices. However he never got a chance to refute her, body disappearing in light and leaving him with more questions than answers.

Strangely the whole thing had made him feel better about his own feelings…

Sloth lay in defeat in the middle of the room. Inside the hellish landscape they had re-grouped, taking down the demon in the Fade. Which meant as soon as they woke up the dissolving corpse of that monster was already on its way out, no foot-hold left in their world. As unsatisfying as it was that he could only experience bringing his rage down on the creature in what could be considered little more than a dream, his only true regret was that they couldn’t save Niall. Niall, despite his own fear, had tried to face this demon...the blood mages to save the rest of the circle but he had been one man against a heavy tide. 

Even still he had smiled in the end, thankful to Hue for what he had done. A smile that the elf wouldn’t let die out in vain as he took the Litany from the man’s body. They were going to end this, there would be no more victims to this hell...these mind games. Defeating the bastards who started this would definitely set things right and everyone; mages and templars alike could feel safe. The last room before the top of the tower, they only had a few stairs left past this to their goal. Everyone rushed the door, anger flooding their veins that turned cold at the sight before them.

He really wished the world wouldn’t keep throwing them for a loop.

“T-this trick again!”, an unsteady voice growled at them from inside a magical cage, eyes clouded in anguish piercing through, “ _I know what you are._ It won’t work! I will stay strong-”

“Cullen!”, Sibylle was the first to rush over followed by Wynn but that only served to make the templar scream out, “Cullen, it’s us! We’re here to help you!”

“The boy is exhausted. And this cage...I’ve never seen anything like it.” The worry on both their faces sent nerves up Hue’s spine...if they didn’t even know what magic was being used here then what were they even dealing with?

“I know you. Only too well...how far they must have delved into my thoughts…”, every word laced with pain, kneeling on the stone in a desperate attempt at prayers. His whole body rocked, shook with unbridled fear on what may come next for him. To Hue it was almost like he was seeing a caged animal, tortured to the point where fear becomes aggression and madness. 

“They’re hurting him to drive him crazy…” Sibylle’s eyes regarded Hue before turning back to the cage, her hands hovering over it. Clear indecision there; if she touched it would it just hurt him more or could she break it if she tried hard enough?

“Rest easy...help is here.” Gentle words helped soften the tension, Wynn’s face showing as much reassurance as she could.

“What do we do…”

“Enough visions! If anything in you is human...kill me now and stop this game!” More rocking, more pain; he refused to look up, “ you broke the others, but I will stay strong, for my sake...for theirs…” Sobs sputtered out between the last few words. Long strings of mutters Hue couldn’t make out were whispered in the air. They sounded familiar, breathed through the dusts of the Chantrys they had visited. This man was praying to his God for any relief...the anger boiling in his blood at the templar’s captors. Who the hell treated any living creature like this?!

“I’m surprised this man has any coherent thoughts left”, Morrigan stated, “though not for long if this keeps up, he’s too afraid.”

“Of course he is, he’s only nineteen!”, sharp words cut through the team, Sibylle hadn’t even spoken loudly but it had been harsh...until she addressed the man in the cage himself, “Cullen, we’re going to get you out, okay? It’s going to be alright.”

“Sifting through my thoughts...tempting me with the one thing I always wanted but could never have…”, it was like he didn’t even hear her, tears filling his voice as words grated through dry throat, “Using my shame against me... _my ill-advised infatuation with_...a mage, of all things.” 

“No...Cullen, it wasn’t shameful, don’t let them tell you that…”, Hue watched that same solemn smile spread on the blonde mage’s lips, her voice soft like a sister comforting their frightened sibling, “your feelings for them aren’t wrong. I regret they had to be sent away but it had nothing to do with you...” There was something going on that none of them could touch, only Wynn seemed to have any idea of the situation at hand but even she looked contemplative. Whatever it was though the demons were using it against the man, tormenting him.

“I am so tired of these cruel jokes...these tricks...these!”, whatever hold he had over his tears were gone, sobbing out his words but his pose stayed strong, “these demons use her against me...torment me with my darkest shame!”

“Cullen!”

“Silence!”, he finally stands up, eyes wet as he glares at her, but that anger barely covers the abject fear trembling through his bones, “I’ll not listen to anything you say! Now begone! ...Still here? But that’s always worked before. I close my eyes, but you are still here when I open them. Not her this time but you...using your voice to shame me now!” Anger melted to confusion but he was still afraid, throwing every word towards them with as much rage as he could muster.

“Stop saying that, it’s not shameful!”

“I am beyond caring what you think! The Maker knows my sin, and I pray that he will forgive me!”

“There’s nothing wrong with liking someone!”

“It was the foolish fancy of a naive boy! I know better now…”, those words cut Sibylle deep, the dark edge sending equal parts rage and sorrow through her. Uldred would pay for the torture he put this poor boy through, for twisting his innocent crush into something to feel disgust for, like he had committed the greatest sin. For turning a sweet boy into another anger-filled monster...

“HEY! Let’s stop screaming at each other!”, Hue butted in, watching Sibylle retreat to the back of the group in frustration, “she’s just trying to help you. We all are...Cullen right? Can you tell us what happened here?”

“They turned my home into this! They deserve to die...Uldred most of all”, words spat out harshly and Hue knew it was the fear driving them but it was still hard to take the brunt of, that’s why he stepped in for Sibylle, “they caged us like animals...looked for ways to break us. I’m the only one left…” 

“You stayed strong…”

“Strong? Hah, what about me is strong? Just because I lived and they died?!” Ouch. Hue felt that one...survivor’s guilt was a hell of a thing, “They turned some into...monsters. And...there was nothing I could do.” The rage and helplessness he was seeing wasn’t much unlike his own when Tamlen died...and he knew it had crossed Alistair’s heart with the Wardens gone. Seeing it so raw, so open, he understood fully why this man felt the way he did.

“I know it feels rough for me to say but you gotta stay strong, we’ll figure out how to get you out.” 

“And to think I once thought we were too hard on mages…”, the words were low, grounded out as he threw a glare past Hue to the two circle mages in the elf’s group. Now wait just a minute…

“Just because some assholes did this doesn’t mean the rest of them are evil!”

“Only mages have that much power at their fingertips. Only mages are susceptible to the infernal whisperings of the demons!”

“This is a discussion for another time!” Wynn raised her voice, firmly cutting him off and stopped Hue from retaliating, “Irving and the other mages who fought Uldred. Where are they?” It wasn’t like he didn’t understand why the man was angry but he couldn’t just assume all mages were evil now! Nobody evil would look that hurt and sympathetic at a man suffering even as he hurled anger at them. 

“They are in the Harrowing Chamber. The sounds coming out of there...Oh, Maker…”

“We must hurry. They are in grave danger, I am sure of it.”

“You can’t save them! You don’t know what they’ve become!”, terrified anger shook his hands as he reached to touch the cage walls and thought better of it, “they’ve been surrounded b-by blood mages whose wicked fingers snake into your mind and corrupt your thoughts!”

“His hatred of mages is so intense…”, Alistair spoke softly, Hue tilting his head a bit to hear, “the memory of his friends’ deaths is still fresh in his mind.”

“And that makes this okay?”, Morrigan spoke up, about to lay in Alistair but he shook his head. The seriousness carved in his face stilled her tongue for now.

“You have to end it now before it’s too late!”, Hue’s eyes darted back to the frightened templar, barely able to register what was said next, “To ensure this horror is ended...to guarantee that no abominations or blood mages live, you must kill everyone up there.”

“What?! No! I won’t kill innocent people because they “might be” something!”

“You would take that risk to us all?!”

“I’d rather spare blood mages than kill a bunch of innocent people!” He felt Wynn’s hand on his shoulder, a soft smile on her lips even though his heart was racing a mile a minute.

“Thank you. I knew you’d make the rational decision.” 

“How is this rational?! Don’t you know the danger?!”

“I know full well the dangers of magic, but killing innocents because they might be maleficarum is not justice! I know you are angry-”

“I am thinking about the future of the Circle! Of Ferelden!”

“You’re screaming because you’re afraid!”, Hue finally shouted back, enough of this back and forth already. What the hell were they even doing? Obviously this man wasn’t in his right mind; he was angry and confused and afraid. He’s been subjected to the evils that magic can do and is now thinking out of fear. Maybe later when he has time to process it he’ll see that the words he spoke now were wrong but they can’t argue with madness! Throwing his hands up, he walks away from the cage and to the stairs, leaving the group to follow along.

“I would deal with the mages myself if I could…”

“Perhaps it best you cannot then, hmm…”, Morrigan sniped off, turning her nose up as she followed behind the elf. Wynn and Zevran also joined Hue, leaving Sibylle and Alistair to the back of the group. It had been hard not to show it, but those words had cut the blonde deeply, in more ways than she could explain right now. Leveling a stare at Cullen she nodded, schooling all that messy emotion behind her cool mask.

“We will free you Cullen…”

“Don’t waste your time on me...deal with Uldred, if that’s what you plan to do. Once he is dead, I’ll be freed.”, his sigh was heavy, filled with anger and unfiltered disappointment, “Maker turn his gaze on you. I hope your compassion hasn’t doomed us all.” Sibylle turns away from his, heading to the stairs with her eyes firmly forward. She feels a hand on her arm though, gently grabbing her attention as they ascended the staircase to catch up.

“Are you alright?” Alistair’s brown eyes met her blue, giving her a sincere look of worry that she hadn’t seen in a long while. It’s...odd...to be yelled at by one Templar then comforted by another..well, ex-Templar. He actually cared...and she wanted to smile, give an off-handed answer but in a rare display of honesty she just shook her head.

“No…but I will be when we _punish_ Uldred.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry I missed two weeks of updating but here I am! Finally! The truth was I just had a game come out and we had a bit of crunch time to work on stuff before it's release. I'm really proud of it though!
> 
> Now on to the story; the Fade, I wanted to work it all in to one chapter and I focused more on the companion scenes here, mainly three because of how Hue will perceive them. Hue's dealing with a lot of his own internal trauma and facing so much of everyone else's is both tiring and eye-opening.
> 
> Also Cullen's cage scene; this poor man has really been through some shit in his life.


	14. Everchanging Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I can't promise to fix all your problems but I can promise you won't have to face them all alone" - anonymous

The trip back to Redcliffe had been easier, much easier, but no less hectic. In fact, he can’t remember them even properly resting before coming up on the castle itself. Leliana and Sten had been filled in the moment they began their journey back here and when the group arrived they were mostly quiet, driven. Waiting for the rest of the mages to show up took a few more days, which were simultaneously slower than needed to be and faster than he thought in Hue’s opinion. Nobody really communicated with each other during this, almost like everyone was afraid to shatter that thinly veiled anxiety hanging over them. He’s not even sure he would have responded if anyone asked him about himself or the Fade, too raw to even be rubbed against.

It was during times like these he really appreciated Zevran’s idle chatter, something to focus on that wasn’t himself. Something to make him feel like he wasn’t alone in those stone-enclosed rooms that felt like he was being entombed. Those nights he missed the wide sky of the camp, even if they were always on guard for darkspawn to pop up any moment, the smell of grass and open air didn’t suffocate him like walls did. The beds were nice though, and the food was tasty, human nobles, at least, had some sense in those aspects. He could feel the assassin’s weight shift the bed a bit and his eyes trailed over to the other from his lying position. The ceiling had been somewhat of a distraction while he listened to the other’s voice carry on but now he needed something more involved to focus on.

“Zevran…”, the blonde looked over at him, expression never changing, “Can I ask you about Antiva?”

“Heh, alright, but I get to stare at you luridly while you do so.” A snort of laughter came from the warden’s mouth, rolling his eyes in fake resignation. Ever since the lake, or rather, ever since they came back here Zevran hasn’t exactly held back on his flirting. It was equal parts flattering and confusing; he wasn’t dumb, he realised what the Antivan meant by his words. It wasn’t like Zevran was being subtle about it anyway and it was a nice distraction from...well, everything at this point. Creators, everything was such a mess right now. Ah, right, question.

“What’s it like there?”

“The only way to truly appreciate it would be to go there.”, he looks out into the room, fondly reminiscing of his home and Hue sits up, watching him as he does, “It is a warm place, not cold and harsh like this Ferelden. In Antiva, it rains often, but the flowers are always in bloom...or so the saying goes.”

“You don’t like it here?”

“It is fine enough with its dogs and its mud. The people are spirited even if they can’t tell the difference between an assassin and a mere killer.”, Hue chuckles when he says the last part fast, making the Antivan grin, “I hail from the glorious Antiva City, home to the royal palace. It is a glittering gem amidst the sand, my Antiva City. Do you come from someplace comparable?”

“Sure, my mother was better than any gem.” A bark of laughter fills the room, Zevran almost not able to catch himself from losing his cool. That had been a good one.

“You have me there, indeed! I, for one, can make no such claim as I never laid eyes on the woman!”, his laughter settled down, shoulders relaxing with a tilt of his head, “You know what is most odd? We speak of my homeland, and for all its wine and its dark-haired beauties and the lillo flutes of the minstrels...I miss the leather the most.”

“W-what?” Disbelief trailed along with laughter, Hue staring at him with a lop-sided smile of confusion.

“I mean the smell. For years I lived in a tiny apartment near Antiva City’s leather-making district, in a building where the Crows stored their youngest recruits. Packed in like crates.”, he saw Hue’s expression start to drop and hurried along with his story, “I grew accustomed to the stench, even though the humans complained of it constantly. To this day the smell of fresh leather is what reminds me the most of home more than anything else.”

“Smelling a cesspool reminds you of home?”

“There’s no accounting for love. Before I left, I was tempted to spend what little coin I possessed on leather boots I spotted in a store window. Finest Antivan leather, perfect craftsmanship… Ah, but I was a fool to leave them. I thought, “Ah, Zevran, you can buy them when you return as a reward for a job well done!” More the fool I, no?”

“Wait, was I supposed to be the job well done?” There was a fleeting unimpressed expression on Zevran’s face before it was quickly neutral once more. Hue managed to catch it though and even if he felt a little bad bringing it up, the curiosity of seeing something other than smug or flirtatious flit across the elf’s face overridden the guilt. 

“The moral of this story is one simply never knows what is to come next. How could I have suspected I would end up defeated by a handsome Gray Warden, a man who then spares my life? I could not.”

“Ah-hah…”

“A question, if I may.”, Hue nods, resting his arms on his knees, Zevran actually seems to regard him for a moment before continuing, “See, here’s the thing: I swore an oath to serve you, yes? And I understand the quest you’re on and this is all very fine and well.”

“Buuut…”

“My question pertains to what you intend to do with me once this business is over with. As a point of curiosity.”

“Ah, is this before or after I ravish you in celebration?” Grin spreads on his face at the slight raise of blonde brows, amber eyes filled with mirth.

“Oh? What’s this? I get ravished once all is said and done? What a dirty little mind you have, my friend. I’m impressed.” Red filled the Dalish’s cheeks as Zevran leaned in closer, amber level with crimson, to the point their noses almost touch, “But you are also distracting me from the point. I said I would serve until you released me. You’d hardly need an assassin to follow you about after all is said and done. Am I wrong?” Luckily Zevran had leaned back to his original position, letting Hue take a silent breath to calm his suddenly beating heart. Excitement and nerves prickled along his skin...and he suddenly was aware of how close they were and where they were to be more specific.

“There’s always a use or two for a handsome elf.”

“I’m sure that I could come up with a few more, if pressed.”, He waited another beat for Hue to say anything but the younger man seemed to be... _aware_ of his presence which was amusing in itself, “ for now it is good to be aware of all the options. Oh, and Hue…”

“Hmm?”

“Having regrets and clinging to them are very separate things. One is, naturally, a part of life and the second...will see you killed. I’m hoping this arrangement can carry on for a while now, yes?” Eyes widened until he felt a hand run through his hair, slowly pulling through the fluff before curving around one of his cheeks. Unreadable...that’s what swirled in Zevran’s eyes as he looked at him. Curiosity mounted high when he was with the other but during times like this he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to feel...because he had no idea what Zevran was thinking. Asking would be a moot point, deflection being a speciality of the assassin. Warmth left his cheek and he watched the other leave his room, door now in his view as he focused on slowing his heart down.

Air charged with the magic surrounding them, mages in a circle powering a spell he’d never know the name of. When they had arrived Irving had explained in simple terms that they would be opening a way into the fade for one mage; one mage to face whatever demon had taken a hold of the child. The question was put to him on who he thought should go but he never had to make that choice, Sibylle spoke up quickly and offered herself. Determination steeled her, she looked fierce, like she was doing this for more than the Arl’s family. Wynn and Morrigan were also fine choices but Hue had conceded to the blonde; she would win, he was sure of it.

So when she did succeed he was not surprised, she’d shown in the tower she was more than capable. Congratulations and teary-eyed cheers exploded in the room. Connor was saved, the demon gone, Isolde alive as well, and now the castle and village could rest easy...at least from attacks. The fate of Arl Eamon himself still hung in the air but they would take their victories as they received them. Promises of dinner and rest that they sorely needed. As well as conversations to finally be had.

Alistair was nervous for that bit, actually he’d mark it under weirdly terrified if he had to put a name to it. Hue’s words burned in his mind, about his vows and family, what he wanted and what he needed. For the longest time he thought they had been one in the same and all the adults had always made that decision for him anyway. So he never had to think that hard about it, someone would always be there to tell him what to do and he’d follow. Follow like he’d always done because it was just easier to do without thinking about how he felt, how empty it all was. Moving from Eamon’s fold to the Chantry right to the Gray Wardens seemed like natural steps.

Was he just doing it again? Making Hue the leader so he could just follow...not think about it at all? 

_Not feel the dread of responsibility of failing because he knew he would?_ Granted the other warden was doing well, Hue was much better suited to the role of leader. Alistair knew he wouldn’t have the same luck as the other, the same way about him that made people believe in him, follow him. It felt right to stand by his side, after all.

“Hey!” His body shook, eyes moving from the floor to the source of the noise. He’d been sitting in his thoughts on the side of his bed that he had no idea when the elf had appeared. Crimson eyes regarded him as the short figure leaned against the doorway, apple crunching between his teeth. 

“H-hey...you.”

“I was calling you but you didn’t answer”, Hue moved to his own bed, unbuckling his armor to get more comfortable. They had both been put in a shared room but this was the first time both men had occupied it at the same time.

“I was thinking…”

“That’s dangerous.”

“Hah, maybe for you”, Alistair relaxed when he heard the soft chuckle from his friend, “I was thinking about what we all saw in the Fade and...stuff. Did you...see anything?” Throwing his belt and chest piece onto the bed, Hue sat facing the human, crimson finally snapping to brown.

“Duncan…”

“Really?” Alistair was surprised, he was sure the elf would think about home or...actually, he’s not sure what he expected Hue to see. That...that actually bothered him.

“Yea”, with a shrug he continues, “not sure why. It was weak and I figured it wasn’t real right away.” Tapping his nose, Alistair stared at his face with a scrunch up brow before realization set in, snorting out a laugh.

“You’re kidding…”, Hue shakes his head, “You’re unbelievable. Maybe you’re more Mabari than me.”

“Could be...I’m glad we kept Ruffles here. Who knows what would have happened to her…”

“Do you think…”, he started then stopped, Hue watching him grasp for words, “do you think I’m weak?” Now it was Hue’s turn to snort in disbelief.

“ _Nooo?_ You can more than handle yourself. Duncan wouldn’t have conscripted you if you were weak.”

“Would he? I sometimes wonder if it was because I was a Prince…”

“I don’t think making a Prince drink magic taint juice that makes him prime Archdemon bait is a smart move if they thought of you as a Prince”, that got Alistair thinking, eyes to the floor, “don’t humans usually want their nobility to live long?”

“Unless you’re in the way of someone else’s ambitions…”

“Then they’d send someone like Zevran, right?” Alistair...couldn’t argue with that and dropped it, fiddling with his hands again, “...you’re not weak Alistair. You’re just, I don’t know, lost?”

“What about you?”, that caught the elf’s attention, staring wide-eyed at Alistair, “You just...seemed like you handled everything so well and then in the circle, you were so frightened.”

“It’s noth--”

“ _Don’t_ say it’s nothing Hue, you can’t say that when your face looks like that”, the elf’s cheeks tinted a little as he looked away, “I won’t force you to tell me if you don’t want to but you’ve heard all my sad stories, I can easily listen to yours.” Eyes still turned away, trailing over the cracks in the stone, as if the wall were suddenly much more fascinating. Maybe Hue didn’t trust him...maybe it had all been one-sided. After all, what did he really know about the elf except small things? And here Alistair was, had, spilled his guts out to him. Was he pushing for a friendship that only he could see?

“I didn’t want to die…”, soft voice was quite loud in the silence of the room causing Alistair’s head to snap up, watching Hue hug his knees to his chest, “ ...I should be dead but I don’t want to die. I’m...scared I’m not strong enough to keep anyone from dying. No, I’m really not strong enough to stop that. Everyone’s following me, asking my every word, and I don’t know anything!” Softness turned to sharpness as Hue’s voice rose with emotion, scratching along his throat and choking up with unshed tears he was so desperately trying to keep in. It sounded so small and frantic, confused like Alistar’s mind had been before.

They both had no idea what the hell they were doing and it’d be hilarious if it wasn’t so frightening. For now he stood up, reaching over to hold those shaking shoulders, voice soft to calm the other down.

“Hey...I don’t know anything either.”

“Creators, that’s not helping!”

“No, no it doesn’t”, he let out a long sigh, “but we’re in this together. We both made that vow, like you said, and we know people are relying on us. Only we can do this. We’ll figure the rest out as we go and hey, we have this...weird and merry band of companions to watch our rears if we ever get too deep in trouble.” Sniffing loudly, Hue looked his friend dead on.

“...You’re only going to be watching Sibylle’s rear, don’t lie.”

“Maker’s breath, Hue, I’m trying to be serious”, he dropped his head, groaning out in defeat but the elf’s laugh made him smile a bit, “aside from your dirty mouth, I honestly can’t think of a better person to do this with.” Hue looked as stunned as a deer knowing it’s end was upon it, looking Alistair over like the other had morphed into some new being. The tension drained from small shoulders, air feeling lighter in their lungs as Hue nodded.

“Me too. I feel the same.”

“I’m glad.” There was a beat of silence; beautiful, heartwarming silence before Hue went and ruined it.

“So...are you confessing your love to me or what are we doing here?” Laugher barked from the tiny frame as Alistair removed his hands like he’d been burned, plopping back down on his own bed with a pout.

“And you ruined it. Congratulations.”

“I’m kidding”, words forced themselves out between laughs, lopsided grin meeting Alistair’s stare, “I know you’ve set your sights on Sibylle.”

“Why do you keep bringing her up?!”, Alistair’s voice cracked and Hue gave him an unimpressed look, forcing him to groan and fumble his words, “I barely know her though she seems...lovely and kind. She put herself in danger for people she didn’t even know. She saved Connor and Isolde...helped us with Redcliffe village. It’s...nice how take-charge she is but isn’t mean or reserved about it.” Eyes flit up to see Hue gaping at him.

“Oh...I, I thought you just wanted to have sex with her”, Sputtering again, Alistair’s face going almost bright red and his hands flail about.

“I don’t! I mean, wait, of course I do, I’d be a fool but no, that’s not! I just think, well of course I think about it, but no! If we were, and this is a _very_ big if mind you, if we were to be _intimate_ with each other I just think we should know each other and develop those feelings first-- _why are you looking at me like that?!_ ” 

“Oh...oh shit!”, Hue’s grin was so wide it almost cracked his face, leaning into Alistair’s space excitedly, “I was right, you’re a virgin!”

The night air did little to cool his burning face, leaning on the stone wall as he gazed out over the distant village. Chill lingered in the air but he was used to it, he was Ferelden after all. Candlelight flickered in certain places within the dark silhouettes of the village, it was like flickers of life assuring them that all was well. Stars dotted along the lake’s surface, blinking in and out with each ripple. Thoughts came swarming back and his fist smacked against the stone, running down his face soon after as he groaned. Hue had assured him he wasn’t making fun of Alistair and that it was cute and he would absolutely help the human win over the blonde mage but that delighted laugh still stung. So what if he was a virgin? How in the world was he supposed to explore that in the Chantry anyway? And when was there even time?!

It was supposed to be special, right?! At least to him, it was. If that made him a fool then he would gladly be one.

“It’s not like I haven’t thought of doing it…”, he breathed out, glaring at nothing in particular.

“Doing it?”, his back went ramrod straight, looking to the owner of the voice that just spoke, the very woman he had been thinking of, “I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“Noo, no, you didn’t...okay, yes, you did but I was”, his hand waved in a vague gesture before running through his hair in frustration.

“Thinking?”

“Yes, that.” Cheeks emblazoned once more when her giggle carried over, joining him at the wall. She leaned over, arms resting on it but instead of gazing out, her eyes firmly fixed to him.

“So...it?”

“It?”

“You’ve never…?” She trailed off, playful look in her eyes and his own stared out over the wall, a grin pulling at his lips.

“Never…? Never what? Had a good pair of shoes?”

“You know what I mean.”

“I’m not sure I do. Have I never seen a ballista? Ate jellied hams? Have I never licked a lamppost in winter?”

“You’re excellent at deflecting, no surprise you use a shield.” His eyes snapped to her, wide before his grin mirrored her painted one. 

“Ow. True, but oooww.”, he pretended to grab his heart, mock hurt plastered on his face before he relaxed, “I’m not making fun of you, my dear lady. Perish the very thought. Tell me though, have _you_ ever licked a lamppost in winter?”

“Would you hate me if I have?”, he shook his head, rubbing the back of his neck. Grin seemed less playful and more nervous. It was adorable that his emotions were so open yet he thought he hid them so well.

“Would you hate me if I haven’t?” Eyes slide to hers, genuinely nervous of her answer but the warm smile spread on her face reassured him.

“No, of course not”, his shoulder lost their tension before she continued, “if you want to lick a lamppost I’ll support you.”

“What? No, that’s not--!”, he realises she’s laughing and sighs, okay yea, he walked right into that one, “I never had a woman just come out and ask me like this. I, myself, never had the _pleasure._ Not that I haven’t thought about it, of course, but... _you know._ ”

“That’s cute.”

“Cute?!”, a whine left his throat and he turned around, leaning against the wall but eyes still firmly on her, “Well, hearing that from a beautiful woman does make me feel luckier; I’ll say that.” Laughter still spills from her, unguarded and loud as it flies into the night air. 

“What even is this conversation?”

“I have no idea!” Hands thrown in the air, he joins in with her laughter. She had been on edge ever since the circle, not that he could blame her, but he wasn’t sure what he could even do or say to lift that weight from her. He liked this though...her smile made a part of him feel lighter somehow.

“So...you think I’m beautiful?”, voice a purr, she set her cat-like grin on him and he laughed in disbelief.

“Of course you are and you know it!”, she shrugs her shoulders but never loses that grin, “ You’re ravishing, resourceful, and all those other things you’d probably burn me for not saying!”

“Hey, I only almost hit you once”, he puts up two fingers and she pouts, literally pouts. Crossing her arms as she leans up with a slight tint to her cheeks and narrowing her eyes at him. It was honestly the most adorable thing he’d ever seen and he relished in it. Wind blew through her hair, strands of gold sliding along her cheeks and shoulders as he painted this memory in his mind. Suddenly the world didn’t feel like it was heading steadily towards oblivion, it actually felt...normal.

“Do you feel like you can never be normal?” The words tumbled out before he could stop them, cursing in his mind how ridiculous he just sounded. She didn’t laugh though, expression neutral as she thought about it.

“I’m a mage...my normal is non-existent”, well, yea, he had to give her that one, “can I ask you a somewhat personal question Alistair?”

“Oh? Already?” His chuckle died out when he realised she was serious, nodding towards her.

“Why did you decide to become a templar?” Ah, that...he looked a bit uncomfortable, shifting his weight with a clearing of his throat.

“I, well, I never _decided_ to become one”, He watched her eyes widen before continuing, “I was given to the Chantry as a child and trained to be one. I could tell you about all the sob stories and how I hated being there but I wouldn’t want to bore you.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to prod”, he shook his head, “but...if you hate the Chantry why do you remain a templar?”

“Ah, well, have you seen the uniform? It’s not only stylish, but well-made. I’m a sucker for good tailoring”, her arms cross and he readies himself to be scolded but it never comes.

“I was under the impression that templars wore heavy plate…”

“That’s just in public. In private we have these yellow and purple tunics, right? Much more comfortable, and you don’t break the beds when you jump on them during a pillow fight.”

“Ah, had many pillow fights, did you?”

“On confession day we could go all night. Being a templar isn’t all about chasing men in skirts and hiding behind priests, you know”, she raised her eyebrow adorably at him and he conceded, “you really don’t want to know about my being a templar, do you? It’s really quite boring. I’m sure you know of all the sordid details anyway.”

“Mmm, but maybe you have some dirty secrets that I couldn’t dare to dream of?”

“Right, the most dirty thing about templars is their laundry…”

“And a few other things, yes…”, his mouth drew in a line, hard to argue with a mage on that one, “you said you never did the ritual, but did you see a harrowing?”

“Yes...once, they um…they didn’t pass…”, he shifted again, looking to the side and she saw how uncomfortable he looked, letting him change the subject, “the truth of the matter is that I did hate going to the monastery. The initiates from poor families thought I put on airs, while the noble ones called me a bastard and ignored me. I feel like Arl Eamon had cast me off, unwanted, and I was determined to stay bitter. But I took some solace in the training itself, I guess. I was actually quite good at it.”

“I can, actually, understand that…”

“The abilities I have came after years of education and discipline that was difficult to achieve, if rewarding. The sword training and religious doctrine all came later”, his head leaned back, breathing in the cool air as he looked to the sky, “I never really felt at home anyway, though, until I joined the Gray Wardens. And Duncan felt my templar abilities might be useful for when we encountered darkspawn magic, so I kept it up.” Warmth touched his skin and he looked down to see Sibylle had put a hand on his arm, looking at him with pity...but oddly enough some understanding.

“I heard about...well, you and this Eamon and Duncan”, she looked apologetic but honestly he’s not surprised, gossip flies fast, “and I’m sorry for your loss of Duncan. He seemed like a good man. As for Eamon, well, we can still help him and we will.” He got lost in her eyes once more but this time it wasn’t because his body nervously turned to stone, it was because he felt warmth rush through his body. Never before had he met a woman that could not only put up with him but...her heart truly must have been as gold as her hair. Even with her a mage and him being a templar...ah, speaking of that. 

“May I ask you a personal question this time?”

“Of course.”

“That templar we rescued...were you and he...you know.” Cheeks burned a little even suggesting it and he watched her eyes go comically wide, shaking her head.

“ _No!_ No, no, no, Maker, _no!_ ”, the sense of relief that took his heart actually startled him, “Cullen was just...a friend? Though I suppose most of the mages would tell you I treated him like a younger brother. It’s...sad to think about, he had only been there a year before all this happened and he told me he joined the templars to help people and mages alike. He was friendly with the mages, probably told he was too friendly, but he had a good heart. That’s why I...I’m so angry with Uldred and those blood mages, they hurt him so deeply. What if he never gets better?”

“It’s...hard when you see your friends die before you, but, he must of seen them tortured and turned before that”, he spoke softly, thinking on how angry the man had been, a man pretty much the same age as him and Hue but changed so drastically, “I didn’t mean to ask, he spoke of a mage like that and well…”

“Ah, were you jealous?” Blushing again, he coughed and she softly chuckled, tapping her lips before continuing, “he was fond of a mage, yes. One of my apprentices but he kept his distance...because of his professionalism of the order but mainly because they was a few years younger than him. It was very obvious, though, for both of them, and a little adorable when he’d help them with the books on tall shelves and other little things. I thought maybe years would go by and they would properly be with each other...there is no law, after all, against templars and mages. But then they had to leave and he…” She trailed off but she never had to finish that sentence, Alistair could clearly see what she was thinking. If this apprentice did come back to see him, would they only find another hate-filled templar ready to put them down?

“That would be heart-breaking…”

“Truly”, she sighed, looking out into the village and he could see her shiver a little, noticing she was just in her robes. Slowly he put himself closer, blocking the wind from her body and if she noticed, she didn’t say anything except for a small smile creeping up. She was almost as tall as he was so his eyes could look to the side, trace her face against the night sky. It felt...like she trusted him, if only a little, but it was there and that sent warmth through his veins. Honestly he knew Hue trusted him too and maybe the others, a little, in a weird way. They had no base, no home, and with the Archdemon on the horizon, they might not even live to see their next birthdays but in this moment, under the clear sky, he knew he had found something of a place to belong. It was fragile, weird, and unstable at best, but it was his. Contentment was a strange new feeling, maybe deep in his heart he did want a family like the demon had shown him, but what was a family if not the people who cared and supported you? In that sense, the Gray Wardens had been that for him...and, in a strange way, Hue.

Eyes closed, he let his head tilt up as he basked in this feeling, feeling the night air envelop his body. Unbeknownst to him blue eyes looked him over curiously, tracing his own features in a manner to understand this strangely complicated yet simple man.

“Well, they got closer…”, Hue whispered from his corner, peeking out just enough to see the two along the castle wall, “I don’t think he’s going to have any problems anyway.”

“I agree, his bumbling is rather endearing”, Leliana giggles, peeking out over Hue.

“Is that what does it for Ferelden women these days? Curious”, Zevran leans against the wall, smirking at his two busybody companions peeking out from the wall.

“Think you can do better?”, Leliana sniffed, looking over her shoulder at the Antivan whose face lit up with the challenge causing Hue to laugh and groan at the same time. He tried to hide the tint in his cheeks in the night air, caused by the wink the other elf gave him. Well, if he thought Zevran was flirting before he’s not sure what’s going to happen now. He’d thank Leliana but he’s sure she’s going to come to regret it anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wanted to keep this one a little more light-hearted and more relationship building between the main ones. Alistair might not know everything going on with Hue still but now he's more aware of the elf's mental state. Also a nice way to get Alistair and Sibylle talking, setting them up. Hue's just...kind of realising Zevran is nice to be around in general but becoming more aware of the attraction there which is going to get kind of funny later on. I think something like this is always needed when you have some heavy stuff going on before, obviously nothing's fixed but gives everyone a break.


	15. Heat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'm scared as hell to want you but here I am, wanting you anyway." - Grey's Anatomy

He had agreed to this. Kept reminding himself too but the tension in his body felt like a bowstring ready to snap. When he had asked Zevran before he was met with refusal on the older elf’s secret assassin knowledge, which he had respected. So when the man had suddenly changed his mind Hue didn’t argue, it certainly wasn’t unwelcomed anyway. Both knew that when it came to the bow Hue was much better (though Zevran wouldn’t admit it, one day he would, Hue swore), but daggers were much more the Antivan’s expertise. 

And that was the name of the practice, teaching the warden how to use daggers with the grace and skill of a true assassin. Zevran’s exact words but it wasn’t like he didn’t have the skill to back them up. Plus, Hue was actually excited for this, it was a conversation they could have that didn’t involve circling each other to weirdly avoid deeper topics. Wow, that sounded...so much sadder in his head but he shrugged it off. He’s not sure when the two of them hit that razor’s edge of trying not to get too deep but he supposed it was inevitable. Aside from Alistair he spent the most time with Zevran in conversation which was quite easy to do given how much the Antivan loved to talk. Or rather, talk enough to fill silence but enough to keep Hue at bay, he was starting to notice. But that wasn’t the point right now…

The point was why in Elgar’nan’s name did Zevran have to be _that_ close?! Settling himself behind Hue, hands traveled along the Warden’s arms to rest at his wrists, correcting his position. Which wouldn’t be so sloppy if the younger elf wasn’t so...distracted at the moment. He swore he could feel the heat of the other’s skin through the armor, his own skin prickling at each sensation. The Antivan wore no gloves since this was just training but Hue distinctly felt how much smoother they felt along his arms, a stark contrast to the callouses that make their home on his own hands. Chest against back, Zevran’s chin settled on his shoulder, speaking right next to his ear in that same tone he always uses when teasing the other...but why did it sound much more _pleasant_ than normal? Accented words lingered within his ear, vibration of the deeper tone traveling through his spine, made worse by how the heat of his breath settled on Hue’s neck.

How was the same voice he’s heard a thousand times affecting him so much? Why was his heart thumping loudly in his chest? Zevran wasn’t being any danger to him but Hue still felt trapped by every little breath and touch, like he couldn’t escape if he tried. _Like he didn’t want to escape._ Realization hit him hard when he felt those same hands had grabbed his waist, pulling him back until no space was left between their bodies. Words...he thinks, Zevran was speaking but between his own heart and sped-up breathing he couldn’t understand a single one. Lips burned a mark on his neck, arms using a deceptive strength to hold him closer. At one point he had been sure he was holding daggers but nothing was in his hand, more than likely dropped to the ground. How could one feel rigid and completely melted at the same time?

“Zevran, I want...”, words seeped out like morning mist in the darkness right before dawn, clinging to every portion of his skin it could find. His voice was weird to him, like it never knew it could sound this way. Thought was left unspoken as he found himself turned, suddenly to the ground with weight bearing down along his body. There was a look on the assassin’s face he hadn’t seen before, couldn’t really describe but it made him heat up all the same. Smooth, tan fingers cupped his face, trailing thumbs along the curving tattoos branded on his cheeks. Hay-coloured hair acted as a curtain when noses were just inches apart but he honestly didn’t care if anyone saw...found them. What shame could he feel when this was something his whole body screamed for? Closing his eyes he felt Zevran lean in closer, licking right up his face in a rapid pattern.

Wait...what?

“The...fu-Ruffles, stop!”, confusion splashed along his body, forcibly waking him up only to find not a certain assassin on top of him but the giant baby of a mabari happily licking his face, making him sputter and struggle. It took quite a bit of force to push the hound off of him, catching his breath as vision adjusted in the dark tent, greeted with the ceiling of it. So...it was a dream. Of _course_ it was. Groaning, he ran his hands down his slobber-cleaned face, not even knowing if he should laugh or cry but the throbbing between his legs certainly made him want to do the latter. Part of him just wanted to take care of it and thrust himself back into sleep but the idea of Ruffles watching any of that act with such an innocent face was...well, it certainly stopped that line of thought. Next plan was to go throw himself in cold water and let nature punish him.

Ugh, this was all Zevran’s fault. He decided that now, it didn't matter if it was true or not, he wouldn’t be having these types of dreams if the other wasn’t so... _him_. Why did he have to be so damn attractive and good at getting under Hue’s skin and just...stupidly nice to be around! When was the last time he felt like this? Eyes widened a bit more when he realised...never, if he really thought about it. Physical attractiveness was easy to find, he’s felt touch before but Zevran lit a fire in his blood that centered in more than just his smallclothes.

Shit, he was supposed to be the hunter, not the prey. How did this even happen?

Bolting up, he managed to at least get pants on before slipping out of his tent. Waterskin in one hand, hand towel in another, his only thought was to get to that small stream nearby and let cold water be the remedy. Maybe once his body stopped doing the thinking for him he could sort out the...rest, Creators, did he really need this right now?

Zevran looked up from his log seat at the sudden flapping of a tent, watching Hue unceremoniously almost fall out of his...half naked, after screaming just moments before. Either the man had a nightmare again (which seemed to happen to Wardens from time to time, as they all found out) or he just witnessed one of the elf’s stranger habits. Which is a feat really, the man had a few. Eyes followed the Dalish, who seemed only equipped with a waterskin and cloth, make a beeline into the trees, disappearing straight into the darkness. Honestly, how does that silly warden have more of a death wish than he does?

“Not going to follow him?”, amber eyes flicked to the blonde mage across the fire, her blue staring right through him, “I know you want to.”

“It seems I must or we become short one less warden, yes?” Chuckling he throws a grin her way, leisurely standing up and stretching his arms over his head.

“You can just say you’re worried about him.” That halted his stretching for a minute, wrinkling his nose in thought before it all disappears, expression as cool as the night air. Had he been that obvious? No...wait, that was ridiculous, those two Wardens were reckless by nature and he made a vow to protect Hue. Worry was just a natural course at this point, there was nothing deeper than that.

So why did he feel like she meant something more?

“Considering the dangers our dear wardens pull us through, worrying is something we’re all accustomed to now”, he laughs but she merely puts her chin in her hand, still staring as if she sees right through him. The fire bounces in her eyes and it annoys him, being unable to read someone who is trying to read you sets his teeth on edge. He never shows it though, lazy grin plastered on his face with a tilt of his head, like he has no idea why she’s staring at him. 

“Hmmm, I think it’s a bit more than worry you’re feeling for him.”

“Is it? I’m not quite sure I can fit anything else with all the worry he fills me with.”

“Do you ever get tired of dodging every question?”, it was so to the point he just shuts his mouth, letting the silence settle between them like dust, “you might come to regret it one day.” Here it is, truthfully outside of speaking with Hue he’s tried to keep an even amount of dialogue with everyone in the group. To appear as part of the pack, close and trustworthy and under their noses, but never close. However, he has spent more time with Sibylle and Leliana than the others, their personalities meshed far better with his way of living even though he enjoys teasing the red-head. 

Or so he thought. Maybe it wasn’t him being so obvious and rather her being observant. This might actually be fun…

“Careful, I believe Alistair might get jealous if he knew your gazes were lingering on me instead”, her eyes narrowed but that only made his grin wider, “of course, what fool would I be to deny a beautiful woman such as you? Maybe you truly need a touch to make you burn harder, yes?” 

“Do those work? Have any of those ever worked?”, she rolls her eyes when he laughs at her, waving a hand toward the woods, “off you go then.”

“I’ll be back with our wayward warden...or not, do not wait up in case.” Now it was her turn to laugh him off, disappearing into the treeline with a lazy gait. As soon as darkness shrouded his form his smile drops, a sigh escaping his lips as he rubs the back of his head. Keeping his footsteps light he tries to spot the dandelion head he’s come to recognise is the other but her words kept ringing in his head. Loudly. She was definitely a dangerous one.

Worry, yes, he worried because they only have two wardens left to stop a damn darkspawn army and Archdemon from destroying Ferelden and possibly more. If Hue and Alistair did not manage to do anything then this dog-land would definitely be consumed, nightmares growing and growing. Maybe later other wardens would finally come, finally defeat the evil but the damage would already be too late. Hue was good but reckless all the same, especially when his mind became trapped with thoughts Zevran could only guess at. Knowing him as he does now, he knows the warden wouldn’t let the Archdemon go...wouldn’t let anything past him. If the Archdemon did win that would mean Hue was already dead…

That stopped Zevran for a moment, the cool wind rustling through the trees and his hair. If he thinks about how he feels if Hue dies, if he talks about those memories haunting the younger elf, that would mean he cared more about him than just a debt to repay. Something he absolutely couldn’t do...for both of their sakes. He knew he watched Hue more than anyone as Sibylle pointed out. To watch his back and backside Zevran quipped back but she wasn’t convinced. Honestly, he wasn’t sure he was convinced either but he had to be.

_Caring for someone was something he absolutely couldn’t do._

Splashing jerked him from his thoughts, following the sound with silent footfalls as he moved through the brush. Carefully he peered through a thick covering of leaves but it was no beast or darkspawn he had stumbled upon but their little warden, filling his waterskin from the stream underfoot. Relief washed over him, good, so Hue managed to stay out of trouble this time around. Okay, maybe that wasn’t fair, Hue was better in the forests than the rest of them...it was just everywhere else he fell head over feet into some predicament. Carefully he walked over, not wanting to disturb the rare, serious look the warden sported for a moment...it was an oddly good look on him.

“If you wished to hide away you could have brought me with yOUAHG!” Surprise startled him more than being hit when he felt the waterskin go across his face, Hue baring his teeth before he realised exactly who he hit. 

“Shit! Zevran! I didn’t...shit, I didn’t hear you! I’m sorry!”, brows drew down as Hue fussed over him but he waved the other off, chuckling a little as he rubbed his cheek.

“If I had known you were dangerous even with a mere waterskin I’d have not worried.”

“I am so sorry…”

“I believe this was my own undoing, sneaking behind you like that”, watching the younger man rub his neck, looking rather apologetic, he had to admit the sight was endearing. Honestly he should have been more prepared, he did sneak up on the man in the dark...in the middle of the woods. Okay, yes, that definitely was his fault but words never made it to his lips when he watched Hue run a hand through his own hair, revealing his full face. Moonlight traced along tanned edges, illuminating water droplets that shook from his hair and down his face...down to the line of muscles in his neck, the curves of his collarbone, and the bare expansion of chest. 

It wasn’t as if he hadn’t seen this before, Hue lacked a bit of shame in washing up but openly staring at him with others around was much more of a challenge. Here, this sight was open completely to him...all his and the way the moonlight filtered through the leaves, water catching it and making parts of him glow was truly a sight. For his short stature the warden did not lack in strength, sure his muscles were more on the lean side but they were still pronounced. They had to be, Zevran thought, with all his running about and using the bow with such ease. Every dip, curve, and hardened muscle along arms...chest, shoulders, stomach...disappearing into pants was on display for him and he only had to reach out, to feel each one with his own hand.

A clearing of the throat disrupted that trail of thoughts, breaking the calm quiet of the forest as his eyes went from abs to crimson eyes. Even in the dark he could tell a blush was forming on the other’s cheeks...ah, seems he’d been caught openly looking. Not that he intended to hide it anyway, his intentions towards Hue in that department were never pure to begin with, letting the other elf know just evens their playing field. 

“Forgive me, my dear warden, I was quite distracted”, there it is, that shifting Hue does when he’s blushing, how adorable. 

“Yea...I could tell…”, the tone laid between embarrassed and resignation, which only made him chuckle but he had noticed before he started staring...Hue was refusing to meet his eyes, “...was there something you needed?”

“Part of our deal was to keep you safe, was it not? I do not find wandering into the dark woods, where darkspawn may venture, half naked to be a sound plan…”, the small groan from the other only made him chuckle, “maybe I should be the one asking what you are doing?”

“I needed to...clear my head…”

“Ah, more warden nightmares again?” Hue’s head turned more away, hand covering his mouth as Zevran swears the blush goes right up to his ears. Oh...so not a nightmare then…

“Not exactly…”

“Was it a dirty dream? Please say it was about me”, this time the waterskin purposely struck out at him but he was ready this time, catching it with a laugh. Oh, this was too good. He knew the other was definitely becoming more aware of him...the mutual flirting and glances were so obvious even Alistair probably could guess what was going on. However, unlike his past adventures where he readily asked, jumping into bed as soon as he could, he had chosen to drag this out.

_Because it was so much fun watching Hue react._

“Why in Mythal’s name would I dream about you”, Hue snorted but the tone was half-hearted, still keeping his gaze firmly on the tree-line, “have you seen half of our party?”

“I cannot argue with that my friend”, huh, now why was Hue scrunching his nose up, “ the ladies alone are all very beautiful, but please do not tell me you’d prefer the likes of Sten and Alistair over someone like me.” A bark of laughter, smile crookedly spreading on his face but at least he was looking at Zevran now.

“Sten? Really? How would that even work? I barely come up to the bottom of his chest…”

“Yes but access has never been easier!” Tension finally fell from his shoulder, laughter ringing out amidst the trees. 

“Creators, he’d kill us both if he knew we were saying that…”, he was trying to school back his laughter but that grin never left his face, “also I’m...not into the idea of being split like a log.” Oh... _oh!_ Well, that was a bit of a revelation...it seems Hue had no idea what he really just admitted either but Zevran’s mind was storing it away.

“Ah, that is a fair point. Surely not Alistair, the smell of cheese alone would be off-putting”, another crack of laughter, which just drove him further, “ though I do see how close the two of you are…”

“Alistair can’t handle a dirty joke without losing his shit, you think he could handle more? Besides, he’s head over ass for Sibylle…”

“Isn’t the saying head over heels?” Hue just shrugged, never letting that grin melt away, “hmmm, so there is room for me then?” Zevran blinked, that cheeky grin stayed blank for a few moments, eyes regarding him before lips morphed into a warm smile. There was a twinge of...something at how soft Hue looked in this moment.

“There’s always room for you Zevran.” Ah...well, that was...odd. Annoying, maybe, how easy Hue can say such lines so easily and have such an effect. Now if the man could say them in the same way knowingly...that would be dangerous. Who would be able to resist? Would he? Sometimes it was hard to...like now, for instance, in the soft light, the way those eyes are looking at Zevran like he’s actually worth something. Like he’s actually a person...absolutely dangerous.

“Mmm, maybe if your hound slept outside we could have plenty of room”, he was expecting a blush, maybe even for Hue to lightly back-hand him as he normally did. However that smile didn’t falter, only parted to allow a soft chuckle through...as if Hue predicted that was exactly what he was going to say. That reaction...didn’t feel bad and his hand reached out, slowly, like he wanted to cup the other’s face. Like he wanted to pull him in and kiss him, break the lull of night with their breaths and bodies. Instead he flicks Hue’s forehead, causing the warden to squawk in surprise.

“Ow! You ass! What was that for?!”

“Oh, pardon me, I thought I saw something there”, he laughs when Hue lunges for him, holding him back, “careful, I might take you throwing yourself half-naked at me as a sign. Though I wouldn’t be opposed to it. Is out in the woods something you’re into?” 

“You’re a pain in my ass sometimes…”

“I could be, quite literally.”

“That’d require you not to be a prick…”, he blinks, looking at Hue who sports a rather triumphant smirk at that particular comeback. A stupidly, adorable smirk like he had just said the wittiest thing in all of Thedas and it just makes Zevran chuckle.

“Small jokes, my dear Hue? Surely you’re above those…”, he watched the gears turn in Hue’s head before a small growl erupted from that chest, the warden moving back to the stream, “Oh, I do believe you are angry with me now.”

“Not really…frustrated though”, he hums, watching Hue splash his reddened face with water once more.

“I know many techniques to solve such frustrations but you do not seem keen to hear them right now”, the unimpressed look he was given was too sweet but he held back his teasing, “but I do believe you should rest. Are we not continuing our trek to Orzammar as soon as dawn breaks?”

“Yea, that’s the plan.”

“I believe we would have been there already had you and Sten not traveled back to the inn by the lake?”

“It was important. Though the person we’re looking for is over at Orzammar too so it works out…”, his voice seemed to settle back to normal, earlier tension gone, “Alistair says we’re close to Honnleath and we keep following the road north we’ll get to the entrance.” Curiosity did nag at him, wondering what important mission was between their warden and their Qunari friend. Leliana had told him that Sten often ignored Hue’s curiosity at the start but now it seemed the giant of a man had warmed up to him, answering the other’s questions a bit easier. Which means whatever this was was probably something similar to how Hue had brought Alistair his pendant back...or Morrigan that grimoire.

“You truly do not know how to stop your own kindness…” Confusion painted Hue’s face from over the towel, whether he couldn’t tell what Zevran meant or didn’t understand the sentence at all was left unspoken. That was a bit unnerving...he was hoping the other would counter him, keep this going but a sigh was his only answer.

“Tell me an adventure...”, it was so out of the blue Zevran could only blink, trying to process the request just given to him.

“Now?”, the nod given to him only made him snort in disbelief, “Am I your personal bard then? You are becoming quite demanding…”

“Better than you burning holes in my body.”

“You were the one to wander out here half-naked and you had given me permission before to stare, therefore should I not take the opportunity when the view is so... _alluring_. Actually, there was a dancer in Antivan city once and I believe I was able to stare off all seven of her skirts. Perhaps my luck will extend to your trousers.”

“ _Zevran_ …”, he leaned against one of the trees, laughing as he watched Hue blow a puff of hair from his face in frustration.

“Alright...but I am allowed to keep staring as I do, that will be my payment”, Hue seemed to concede to that, using the waterskin to run water through his hair now as Zevran started, “Let’s see...my adventures, hmm? I’m hardly an old man just returned from across the ocean, am I? Should I shake my first at nearby children while I talk about the good old days?”

“I hear 24 is practically 50…”, Hue tosses a smirk at him, “if you don’t want to talk, you don’t have to…”

“Now I didn’t say that. Old men love to talk, after all. Will I get a kiss afterwards?” Eyes widened a bit at the suggestion, crimson eyes scanning over his face before looking to the ground once more.

“If you’re lucky…”

“Oh? Now the anticipation is going to kill me. _Thank you very much for that._ ”, hand over his heart, he whined jokingly, breaking the sudden tension from Hue’s shoulders but Zevran would lie if he said he wasn’t hoping it happens, “ My second mission ever for the Crows was a bit intriguing. I was sent to kill a mage who had been meddling in politics.”

“Meddling in politics?” A shrug answered that question.

“How should I know? I got the impression it involved sex...but then I get that impression about most everything. Odd, really.”

“Really odd...can’t ever imagine you thinking about such things.” Fondness spread on Zevran’s face where Hue couldn’t see, it was quite entertaining when the warden snapped back.

“As it turned out, the mage in question was quite a delightful young woman. Long, divine legs, as I recall. I caught her in a carriage on her way to escape the provinces. After I killed her guard, she got down on her hands and knees and begged for her life...rather aptly, I might add. So I joined her in the carriage for the night and left the next morning.”

“Wait, she didn’t try to kill you?”

“Well, yes. Twice, actually. Then she decided to try and use me, instead. The woman had actually convinced me to speak to the Crows on her behalf. What can I say? I was young and foolish at the time.”

“ _Nooo_...you?” Rolling his eyes, he couldn’t keep the smile off his face when Hue laughed at his own joke. Waterskin making its way to his lips as Zevran continued.

“Let’s see...then as I was kissing her good-bye to return to Antiva City, she slipped on the threshold and fell backwards out of the carriage. Broke her neck. Shame, really, but at least it happened quickly.” Sputtering could be heard as Hue choked, caught between coughing and laughing as he pounded his chest.

“W-what? Oh...shit, haha!”, he could see Hue seemed to feel bad for laughing but that didn’t stop it from rumbling from his chest. “So you didn’t actually kill her.”

“Not actually, no. I was a bit unimpressed by the development, at first. Then I found out that she had told the driver to take her to Genellan instead. She had planned to lose me in the provinces. I would have looked very foolish to the Crows. As it was, my master was very impressed that I had done such a fine job making it look like an accident. The Circle of Magi was unaware of foul play and everyone was happier all around.”

“Wow…”, it was whispered out before Hue faced him with a lopsided grin, rubbing the towel through his hair, “ stuff like this happens to you often, huh?”

“Like being spared by a benevolent mark who then helps me escape from the Crows? Yes, it does seem to happen now and again, doesn’t it?”, shrugging one shoulder he watches a blush spread across the other’s face, trying to hide it behind the towel, “It was after that when I learned that one needn’t let a pretty face go to your head. Professionalism was key. That’s my moral of the day, you see.”

“So you _never_ mix business with pleasure?”

“Hmm. Well, there is you...but I’ll point out that you did have to capture me and tie me up, first. Every rule has its exception.” A strange look flitted across the Warden’s face, eyes looking out from underneath the hood of the towel atop his head. Zevran could tell the other was trying to read him but what he found there, he had no clue since the other’s expression stayed blank.

“So...I’m the exception to your rule?” Soft words almost died in the night air as soon as they left lips, but were loud enough for the assassin to hear. A jolt ran through his chest...anxious, weirdly fear...of being caught? Somehow words had formed a new meaning in the warden’s head, a meaning that made Zevran feel like he was standing on a cliff’s edge. No...no, no, that’s not what he had meant...right? Granted their situation was definitely nothing he had been in before but that exception didn’t exist. A smile kept to his lips but it was tinged with nerves, a laugh forced from them awkwardly.

“Why yes, usually I like to be the one doing the tying, but I’ve developed a taste for being bound...possibly gagged if you prefer.” It was a smooth delivery, he knows it was but Hue’s unblinking stare did nothing to calm the sudden spike of his heart. How on earth could a man be so entirely clueless on most things yet so perceptive on the things he shouldn’t be? Whatever answer he found from Zevran’s expression he seemed to let it be, putting the towel around his shoulders and gathering his waterskin.

“Maybe, Creators know I’ve wanted to gag you a time or two…”, oh, well, that was definitely a thought he would have fun entertaining later, “thank you Zevran…”

“I haven’t even done anything yet and already I am being thanked.”

“You were worried about me and kept me company...I actually needed that. My head’s been a bit of a mess but it...untangles when I talk with you.” Waving a hand over his head, a fond look settles on his features and suddenly Zevran feels himself warm for an entirely different reason. Honestly...he’s seen this man rip a darkspawn’s head from its shoulders so how could he look so soft and fragile sometimes.

“I’m glad my services are being put to good use then”, shaking the odd, warm feeling of someone genuinely thanking him, he grins, sending a wink the other’s way, “though I have many more skills you could be putting to use.” 

“Hah...yea, so you’ve told me…”, Hue starts to walk past him, stopping suddenly when he was right next to Zevran. A question in the assassin's features before it was suddenly answered, the warden leaning up a bit and kissing him on the cheek. It was so quick yet unmistakable as Zevran resisted the urge to touch where those lips had just been.

“Ah...so I get my kiss after all.”

“You did keep your promise…”, clearing his throat, he watched as Hue tried to wrest away the blush on his face, hiding it out in the dark, “...goodnight Zev. See you tomorrow.” With that he hurried away towards the camp, leaving Zevran to stare at the stream, wondering if he needed to jump in there as well since the option of pinning down Hue was out of the question for now.

Morning had started out routine; eat, pack up, travel. Same as they had been doing for weeks by now, except later in the day they had stumbled upon a merchant fussing about...a goat or whatever. Hue honestly was waiting for the man to ask them to find his goat but what he hadn’t expected was to talk about a golem. A giant, dwarven, rock-made creature that did your every command and was giant...and magic...and made of rocks and in the name of all Creators he just had to see that! Sheer excitement filled his body and nobody could convince him not to take the control rod nor deny him when they ventured back to Honnleath. 

Not surprisingly there had been darkspawn in the village, easily taken care of by the group, but what was worrying was how...empty the village was. Empty of villagers or their dead bodies if they had been killed and right in the middle was sat a large stone statue, birds using it as a resting place. Words given to him had not worked...a dud, but further exploring found them inside a large house, moving towards the basement to clear out more of the monsters. Down in the depths they found the villagers, protected by a barrier from the creatures that had hunted them...a smart move by the one named Matthias. Whose father was supposedly a mage and researcher who had previously owned the golem and would give them the proper words if they saved his daughter who had wandered into a dangerous lab. Great.

It had been a bit of a blur, there’d been a cat that wasn’t really a cat trying to possess the girl. A giant puzzle using fire needed to be solved in exchange...okay, so he had to admit he kind of left this one to the mages. If he had had his way he would have just attacked the demon straight on sight but Wynn and Sibylle warned him that might have put the girl in danger. Tricking the demon allowed the girl to escape and then they did what he did best, fight and kill the demon, removing any dangers to the house.

Now, finally, here they were with the right words and Hue almost bouncing on his toes to try it out. Spoken quickly, he watched in wonder as the statue cracked and shook, finally moving with a shout as it shook off the rest of its...stiffness? Could statues do that? Oh, it is looking right down at him...eyes and crystals glowing as it actually let out a sigh.

“I knew the day would come when someone would find the control rod. And not even a mage, this time. Probably stumbled across the rod by accident, I suppose. Typical.” His mouth was slightly open in awe, it was alive and talking to him and was a giant, stone...person? This was amazing!

“Hello to you too!” It regarded him for a moment before looking over the village.

“I stood here in this spot and watched the wretched little villagers scurry around me for, oh, I have no idea how long. Many, many years.”, another sigh and it turned to him again, “I was just beginning to get used to the quiet, too. Tell me, are all the villagers dead?”

“Uh, not all of them...no.”

“And the villagers had no idea they were being watched. _Creepy…_ ” Alistair piped in, the last word a bit sing-song under his breath as he looked to the side.

“Some got away, then? How unfortunate.” A snort came from his lips, apparently the golem held no love for this village but he supposed being stuck as the town’s centerpiece for years might make him bitter too.

“Do you have a name?

“Perhaps, I may have forgotten after all these years of being called “golem”. “Golem, fetch me that chair.” “Do be a good golem and squash that insipid bandit.” And let’s not forget, “Golem, pick me up, I tire of walking.””, Hue honestly wanted to laugh, for something that was supposed to be a mindless creature this...uh, person, definitely had a lot of attitude, “it...does have the control rod, doesn’t it? I am awake, so it...must…” The concern in the golem’s voice made his head tilt, looking at the rod and back up at them.

“Something wrong?”

“I see the control rod, yet I feel...go on. Order me to do something.” Crossing his arms, Hue thought for a moment before pointing a finger over at Zevran.

“Give Zevran a hug.” A look of betrayal crossed over the Antivan’s face, clearing his throat as Hue grinned.

“Hmph. I, uh, I don’t appreciate foreign objects invading my personal space. Well, usually.”

“Okay, okay...uh. Attack Alistair.”

“HEY!”, Alistair blanched, glaring at Hue, “so he gets a hug and I get attacked?!”

“That is what you are concerned about?”, Morrigan chuckles, almost in anticipation to see if Alistair would indeed be chased by a golem. Sadly, she had to stay disappointed as the golem hums in thought.

“And...nothing? I feel nothing.”, awe laced their voice, “I feel no compulsion to carry out its command. I suppose this means the rod is...broken?”

“Well, shouldn’t you be happy about that?”

“It is simply...what should I do? I have no memories, beyond watching this village for so long. I have no purpose...I find myself at a bit of a loss. What about it? It must have awoken me for some reason, no? What did it intend to do with me?” Hue blinks, sweat starting to form on his forehead as he can feel all eyes on him now.

“I, uh, hadn’t given it much thought…”, if anyone was surprised, nobody showed it and somehow even the golem looked less than impressed.

“I see. Wonderful. I suppose I have two options, do I not? Go with it or...go elsewhere? I...do not even know what lies beyond this village.”

“You can come with us if you want!”, there was almost a collective sigh behind him, save with Alistair who grabbed his shoulder.

“Arrrre...you certain you want to bring that thing with us? It could be dangerous. And large.”

“I mean...we have you and Sten. Plus, they could be a really great battering ram.” There was a brief moment he could see Alistair about to argue with him before the other warden sighs in defeat.

“Good point. Better than me, anyhow.”

“I will follow it about then...for now. I am called Shale, by the way.” Reaching out, Hue managed to take Shale by the hand with both of his, giving them a shake with the largest grin he could have.

“I’m Hue! This is gonna be great!” Another companion to help them, another friend to make! This time a really interesting one and Hue couldn’t wait to get to know them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For some reason I kept starting and restarting this chapter but I think I finally got it where I wanted it. Since this IS supposed to be a Zevran and Warden fic I have now started them on their path, Hue maybe realising more than Zevran that dreaded feelings might be involved. Slow descent into sexual tension before the first one breaks. Also we now have Shale, who I love a lot!


	16. Realization

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I realized I was thinking of you, and I began to wonder how long you'd been on my mind. Then it occurred to me: Since I met you, you've never left.” - Unknown

“Listen, just...tell us the truth, you wouldn’t want to make my friend angry”, Hue waves his hand to Sten standing right behind him, towering mass of intimidation he was..

“I am already angry…”

“See?”

“I swear on Andraste I don’t have it”, the merchant cowered, fiddling his hands together, “I sold it.”

“Creators... _to who?!_ ”

“To a dwarf in Redcliffe”, Hue runs a hand down his face, long groan crawling out of his throat. Of course it’s all the way back in Redcliffe.

“You swear?”

“I swear on my life, ser!” As much as he really wanted to punch this shady shem right in his mouth he knew better, clenching his fists to his side and marching back to the group.

“You look ecstatic”, Alistair quipped and Hue leveled him with a glare before rubbing his neck.

“Gotta go back to Redcliffe…”

“What? But we just got here!”, the other warden gaped, shaking his head, “we don’t have time to march all the way back to Redcliffe!”

“Yea, I got that...so that’s why Sten and I will go alone and you guys can stay here.”

“What?”

“You’re a gray warden too Alistair...you can handle the group for a few days”, Alistair’s eyes bulged, realising what this truly meant.

“Oh no...no, no, no, no, I can’t lead! That is a terrible idea!”

“For once I agree with this hapless fool. Leave him in charge and surely you will find naught but bones on your return.” Rubbing the bridge of his nose, Hue sighs. He really wasn't in the mood to deal with another fight between Morrigan and Alistair. Not now, at least.

"Alistair knows more about the treaties than I do...just, stay in Orzammar, stay out of trouble until we got back. Okay?"

"Must we truly be subjected to this?" Throwing his hands up in the air, a growl of frustration hurtles from his mouth. If she wanted to argue so much about it...

"Fine! Sten, Morrigan, and I will go and the rest of you stays! We'll set up before we leave. There! All problems solved!" Alistair moved to speak but his mouth shut tight when Hue's eyes dared him to argue. Turning on his feet the elf looked up at the massive door, intricately carved from the side of the mountain. The sights could wait however, they needed to get in and settled so the tiny group could hurry this side trip along. At least, that was the plan, until he heard an indignant voice speak loudly as soon as he reached the top of the steps.

“King Loghain will not suffer the delay of his appointed messenger!” A long groan escaped his lips, hand running over his face in sheer annoyance. Well, looks like they’ll have to deal with this first.

Taking care of the nuisance at the door had been the easy part, sadly, and the hard part was finding out the dwarves could do nothing to help them. Why? Well, it seemed their King had died and now they were stuck in their own civil war so the Blight was, weirdly, the last thing on their minds. Discord caught between the King’s son Bhelen and his trusted advisor Harrowmont over who would take the throne and dwarves did not play around with politics. If the now dead dwarf in the middle of the square had anything to say about it, caught in an argument from both sides before everyone dispersed. A tired looking captain grumbled about the mess and massive idiots; Hue had to agree, this kind of stuff gave him a headache too.

With that he was kind of glad he was going to be gone for a few days, let Alistair take care of...this. In the back of his mind he knew he was putting off the inevitable but he’d take his breaks where he could find them. They did desperately need the dwarves’ help after all, or else Hue would have marched right back out with everyone. Despite the earlier arguing Hue conceded to having Morrigan and Shale join with him and Sten, but not Zevran. No, definitely not, he was still confused about the other elf in particular and needed to sort that head mess out, preferably where he couldn’t stare or be stared at by the other. If Zevran noticed Hue obviously leaving him out, he, thankfully, didn’t comment on it.

It seemed the smarter idea to have the more...social ones stick with Alistair for this nonsense anyway. Leliana and Zevran could talk their way out of a bag and Sibylle and Wynn seemed rather mature and level-headed, Alistair was in good hands. Not that he didn’t think the human couldn’t figure things out himself, he did trust him after all.

With the identity of the dwarf in Redcliffe and a message for the Circle of Magi from a woman named Dagna (he couldn’t say no to her, she was very enthusiastic!), they set off, leaving the others in Orzammar.

Alistair wasn’t sure what to expect but being told that the Wardens could help in choosing the future king of Orzammar was...not something he had wanted to hear. They were supposed to be gathering an army to stop the Blight, the Archdemon, and go after Loghain, not...this! Hue had suggested getting information while he was gone but he can’t wait to see the look on the elf’s face for this one. Rubbing the bridge of his nose he could feel a headache coming on, the sound of the marketplace like white noise as he slumped on the bench. They had been walking around for a while now, talking to anyone that would give them the time of day and more so if they could give them information.

Unlike the chilled Ferelden air, Orzammar stayed rather warm. Chances are because of the lake of lava underneath the city that simultaneously heats and powers it. A reddish glow melts in the browns and golds that make up the city. Buildings and structures carved out of the stone with intricate designs. Metal casing the stone in some places, adding to the decor or devices to hold the heavy doors, the lanterns lighting the homes. Warm color caked everything and merchants hocked their wares from beautifully decorated stalls, calling out to the outlanders admist the yelling of each political party. Most of what he found wasn't wares but that politics were a headache for humans but dwarves decided to make it twice as difficult.

“Gray Wardens aren’t even supposed to be involved in political affairs”, groaning out, he slumped more on the bench, barely concentrating on the world around him.

“Well, they were the ones who involved you, so I’m sure an exception can be made”, Sibylle cooly responded, looking over his undignified form, “besides, use it for practice.” That made him turn his head, looking up at her with a cocked eyebrow.

“For?”

“For if you become King, your majesty”, the teasing lilt in her voice followed a chuckle, making him scrunch up his face at the idea.

“Me? Become King? Never going to happen.”

“Never say never…”

“Can you imagine _me_ as King? Wait, don’t answer that, I don’t want my feelings hurt.”, another soft laugh flits out besides him and he watches her brush her hair back, caught in awe before he realises he had forgotten something, “Actually. Now that we’re alone I wanted to talk to you about Redcliffe.” Metal gently brushed against stone as he sat up properly, turning to face her with a serious expression.

“Is something wrong?”

“No, I just wanted to thank you”, breath huffed out as he tried to catch the proper words in his mind, “You went out of your way to save the Arl’s family and you did it, even though it would have been easier not to. There’s been so much death and destruction, it...well, it makes me feel good that at least we were able to save something, no matter how small. I owed the Arl that much.” She hums softly, tapping a finger to her painted lips as she regarded him with an indiscernible look.

“It feels odd to be thanked for doing the right thing.”

“I don’t know how many people would have done the right thing, so I wanted to thank you”, she looks away for a moment, brows drawn tight as if she’s seriously contemplating his words, “you risked a lot for a family you didn’t know.”

“I was not going to leave a child to a demon if I could help it and as much as I didn’t like the way Isolde spoke, she was ready and willing to die to save her son”, blue eyes catch brown, they were steeled with resolve but cloudy...as if she wasn’t sure of herself for some reason, “no child should be without parents that actually love them.” The words tossed around in his head, echoed as the meaning hit him like an avalanche. Whether she had been talking about herself or him wasn’t spoken out loud but eyes conveyed an understanding that was better left unspoken. She was right, even if Connor had to go to the circle now, the child would go knowing, at least, his parents loved him and wanted him. A luxury that not every child in the circle, or even outside of it, had. Mood surrounded them like a fog, blurring out the world around them and he dared to reach out, taking her hand for a brief moment of comfort.

“I agree”, her eyes softened with his words, the tense edges of their bodies melting down for a moment before he realised he was holding her hand, letting go with a blush and a cough, “Sooo...what are we going to do about this then?” Waving his hand vaguely in the direction of the whole city, he returned to his almost slumped position on the bench, missing a fond smirk grow on her lips.

“Our options are Bhelen and Harrowmont correct?”

“Harrowmont seems nice enough”, she scoffed at that.

“He’s a coward who relishes the power but fears changing anything with it”, he couldn’t help but chuckled at her biting words.

“Zevran said the same thing. Well, more like, _“he is a coward who can’t even get his own hands dirty”_ ”, she covers her mouth to hide the laughter at his poor impression of Zevran. 

“May I ask a question?”, he looks up at her, arms crossed lightly over his chest, “what do you see? About how everyone lives, now that we’ve done a few laps around the city.”

“Besides the fabulous indoor lake that could kill you?”, he scratched his chin, brows drawn down in thought, “Well, right now, everything’s a mess. Each side wants to squabble and kill each other over who gets to sit on the big comfy chair. Meanwhile there’s a Blight approaching outside and since Darkspawn come up through the tunnels, this does make it their problem too. The lower end of the city is...unfortunate and why it’s even that bad is beyond me. As if the previous King didn’t care. Everyone turns a blind eye to it and the “casteless”, which leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Let’s see...according to the Merchants the trade has been awful, most agree that opening up to the topside would be a major benefit. All in all, this place is one giant mess you step in and immediately regret.”

“So you have been paying attention.”

“Hey!”

“It comes down to you and Hue really but in my opinion I’d go with Bhelen”, he thought on that, scratching his nose.

“Really? He’s kind of a big jerk.”

“Oh, his personality is awful, but his policies are sound. Abolish the title of casteless, open up trade completely. The dwarves can’t stay in the past forever and he knows it. Tradition is a nice relic to keep by the fireplace but shouldn’t be the driving force of a Kingdom. As time flows, change happens, and we must embrace it or be swept away.” His eyes firmly glued to her, watching the way she spoke, the way her eyes lit up with a fire much different to her anger. Times like this, when words of purpose flowed from her lips, he felt like his breath was stolen away once more. Enraptured, or rather, spellbound, because of her being a mage. Like a spell being casted over him, one he honestly didn’t mind, and he is in awe of her once again.

“That does sound like the better plan”, rubbing the back of his neck, he moves to sit up with a sigh, “Right. I believe we’ve rested enough. Time to get back to our usual schedule of death and dismemberment. Oooh wait...it’s not Tuesday, is it?” A choked snort sounded off next to him, making his head whip around to stare wide-eyed at the blonde mage staring right back at him. Hand covering her mouth and he could see red blossom across her cheeks. The grin on his face grew as her eyes narrowed.

“Not. A. _Word._ ”

“Nice to see one ugly thing about you-AH! Don’t hit me, I bruise easily!”, laughter rumbled through his chest, spilling from his lips as she bopped his shoulder, reaching for his head next but he leaned out of the way, “Stop! I surrender!”

“Your mouth is a source of trouble, let me remedy that!”

“I like my mouth as it is, thank you!”, catching her wrists gently, he leans further back only to fall flat on his back on the bench, taking her with him. Laughter soon ceased vibrating as he became very aware he just pulled her on top of himself, drawing in a sharp breath. Hands froze as he still held her wrists, looking up with her hair spilling down, curtaining her face to the rest of the world. To him, he could see the blue of her eyes more brightly in the shadow, the lump in his throat going down dry, his eyes going from blue to the painted lips parted just slightly. Maker’s breath…

“Alistair…”, her voice was low, almost a whisper but felt loud and commanding to him, drawing his attention back to her.

“Y-yes?”

“Were you going to let me go or...planning to do something with me? In this very public place?” his hands snapped open, releasing her so suddenly she almost fell right back on his chest. Hands planted themselves on metal, lips parted to reprimand him a bit but the adorable look on his face stopped that. He was sure she could see exactly what he was feeling, her face neutral while his was mixed with fear and awe, ready to submit to anything she did to him. Nerves were shaking; there was a heady mixture of embarrassment, lust, submission, and the urge to run away filling up his head. So many thoughts screamed inside his mind, body frozen as she leaned in a bit more, face getting closer to his before her name was being shouted out. As if she had never been there, she was sitting up once again on the bench, looking to the source of the noise as he shot up as well. Sweet Maker, that was almost more terrifying than facing down a horde…

“Switch with us. Now.”, he didn’t have a chance to catch his breath before Leliana was pulling him off the bench, taking his place next to Sibylle. Wynn also had stomped over with a cheeky looking Zevran in tow.

“Wh...wait a minute, what’s going on?” Confusion replaced his earlier nerves, not sure why Leliana and Wynn looked rather perturbed at this moment.

“Let us say if we spend another minute with him we might do things we regret”, the measured tone of Wynn’s voice had him blink, looking over at Zevran.

“Is it wrong of me to comment on the obvious beauty of you fine ladies and your sizable charm?”

“Oh Zevran…”, Sibylle sighed out, patting Leliana’s hand who had wrapped her arms around Sibylle’s arm and... _wait a minute_. Wasn’t she a little close? Something else started to rear its ugly head in Alistair, something he really didn’t want to believe he could feel.

“Was it ever lonely in the Wilds with just you and Flemeth?”, Morrigan looks up from the small pot over their fire, dark eyes focused on him now. He was relaxing on a fallen log, practically laying on it as he watched her cook. Sten was asleep somewhere nearby and Shale was standing off to the other side...doing whatever Shale does since sleep isn’t a thing they need. 

“At times, perhaps”, the spoon scrapped along the metal, stirring the contents of the stew, “A world full of people, and buildings, and things was all very foreign to me. If I wished companionship, I ran with the wolves and flew with the birds. If I spoke, twas to the trees.”

“But you did leave…”

“Such simple pleasures will only enthrall for so long”, she chuckled, turning in her seat to face him, “I recall the first time I crept beyond the edge of the Wilds. I did so in animal form, remaining in the shadows and watching these strange townsfolk from afar. I happened upon a noblewoman by her carriage, adorned in sparkling garments the likes of which I had never before seen.” A smile formed on his face as he relaxes more, watching her eyes light up with the fire and moving her hands about. For all her insistence on how much more mature she was than them, she certainly was just as animated.

“This was in Lothering?”

“Correct. I was dazzled, this to me seemed what true wealth and beauty must be. I snuck up behind her and stole her hand mirror from the carriage. Twas encrusted in gold and crystalline gemstones and I hugged it to my chest in delight as I sped back to the Wilds.”

“Hah, little Morrigan was a thief!”, she rolled her eyes at him, waving off his chuckle as she continued. 

“Flemeth was...not pleased.”, her face drops a bit, the excitement of her voice losing its luster the more she speaks, “She was furious with me. I was a child and had not yet come into my full power and I had risked discovery for the sake of a...pretty bauble. To teach me a lesson, Flemeth took the mirror and smashed it upon the ground. I was heartbroken.” Hue had sat up during this, watching his friend speak with a barely hidden sadness that must have lingered from her childhood.

“You were just a kid and you were curious. Like you said, being cooped up in the Wilds was gonna make you wander eventually.”

“That matters not, I had been foolish to risk so much for a mere material object. Beauty and love are fleeting and have no meaning. Survival has meaning. Power has meaning. Without those lessons I would not be here today, as difficult as they might have been.”

“I mean, true, survival is important but love is too. You can’t really believe the world is better off without it.”

“Of course I do, what has love ever done but make the strong weak. The intelligent foolish. Surely you cannot be so blind to see its own effects on yourself.”

“I...what?” He blinked, about to argue with her but his words died out, confused at what she meant. She let out a groan, like he had been presented with the answer right in his face and still couldn’t get it.

“I speak of your...unsightly infatuation with that elf, whom, may I remind you, has indeed tried to end your life. Glancing at him every moment he is around, distracted by...what I can only assume is unnecessary thoughts of him. Hmm? The world may be ending Hue, do you truly think he matters?” His eyes flashed through the fire, brows drawn as he startled her a bit with a glare.

“That’s not fair Morrigan. I don’t...I’m not sure what I think of him. Yes, I’m attracted to him, but he’s also my friend. You’re my friend! None of you are unnecessary to me! We’ll stop the Blight but that doesn’t mean we have to stop living!”, he huffed, shaking a hand through his hair as he tried to piece together his thoughts, “and...he’s not what’s been distracting me.”

“Oh? Is there yet another who does?” Snapping back, she looked a little regretful of the tone that left her mouth but schooled her expression back.

“You’ll call me stupid if I tell you. Wait...you’ll call me stupid anyway.”

“Oh, do not be silly. You are not that whimpering fool of a warden…”, he rolls his eyes, even away from the main group she couldn’t help but take pot shots at Alistair. Chewing on the thought, she waits patiently for him to finally speak his mind.

“Do you...fear death at all?” Blinking, she doesn’t offer much of an expression as she stares at him, the crackling of the fire the only break of silence.

“Survival has meaning, like I have said. And what is survival if not the natural fear of death? Nobody wishes to die, Hue, and other than your...unfortunate obsession at the moment, I do believe everyone in this motley group wishes to avoid it. You included, I presume?”

“Well, yea…”

“Then I do suggest you keep your mind clear and focused, if not at least when we are in the midst of battle.”, a small blush goes across his face, embarrassed that even Morrigan has noticed his thoughts running away with him.

“I’m just afraid I’m not gonna be strong enough or fast enough to protect you all”, a short bark of laughter startles him, snapping his head over to the mage whose lips are pursed with an almost insulted look.

“You? Protect us? I have survived through my own power, alive before you now am I not? Flemeth’s lessons were harsh but I have no need of protection when my own power lies within my own hands. Have you not thought that maybe we are your protectors instead?” Her haughty grin had the gears in his head turning, words filtering through before the meaning finally sunk in and he let out an indignant noise.

“Hey! I can take care of myself! I don-”, words stop short, realization smacking him right in the face before he bursts out laughing, “oh shit!”

“One moment you are on the verge of sorrow and the next you are laughing like a fool. What is the meaning of this now?”

“No, it’s! I get it now!”, his laughter is finally dying down, throwing a warm smile her way, “thanks Morrigan. Sometimes you really know what to say...when I can understand you.”

“Your comprehension is surely not my problem”, despite her sassing him back, a small smile played on her lips, watching the tension drain from his shoulders, “and now that you have come upon this answer, maybe you can provide another one.”

“For?”

“As in why in all of Thedas would you stoop your expectations so low as to be attracted to that sneaky little gremlin? It is absurd, there is no logical reason why someone such as yourself, even if absurdity flows through your veins, would sully yourself for an annoying, prattling little man like him. While his comments on my appearance are in most cases correct, they are also unnecessary and make me want to set flames upon his body.” Hue’s laughter starts up again. Her voice had gotten so passionate, hands gesturing wildly as she tried to understand but every complaint only sent him into another fit of laughter.

“I mean, he is right, you are beautiful”, that stops her in her tracks, brows drawn a little in confusion as she looks him over, “and I can’t really explain right now other than I’m attracted to him. It’s a rush that I like.”

“A rush? One could ride a horse or duel some other absurd fool along the roadside. Not waking up dead in one’s tent because you wish to bed a man that was previously hired to assassinate you.”

“Exciting, isn’t it?”, her unimpressed look makes him chuckle, “I don’t think he’d try to kill me anymore Morrigan.”

“You are so confident then? Pray tell, why?”

“Just a hunch…”

“Then we will surely see your corpse one morrow after you foolishly choose to lay with him.”, Hue knew if he pointed it out that she definitely was worried about him that she would deny it vehemently but it was nice to see. To feel that she really did care about his well-being and had his back but the conversation put a much clearer picture in his mind. Tomorrow they’d be at Redcliffe and be able to get Sten’s sword back and tonight, tonight the jumbled mess in his chest had finally untangled through her complaining. 

He did, indeed, want Zevran and now he couldn’t wait to get back to the other elf, heart pounding in giddy excitement at his revelation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it took me so long to post this. Between the halloween stream show weekend, promoting my game, and the 24 charity stream this weekend I had been busy. But here we are, in Orzammar, at least the start. I'm going to be pulling in other character major conversations to Hue now as he starts deepening all these friendships. Also Alistair is going through a crisis of his own. He'll get it eventually.


	17. Waves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The sea is emotion incarnate. It loves, hates, and weeps. It defies all attempts to capture it with words and rejects all shackles. No matter what you say about it, there is always that which you can't." - Christopher Paolini

Drunken merriment filtered out the doors and into the stoned-streets below; boisterous and off-key but providing the calm many needed at this point. Outside tensions grew every day, the one who used to be neighbor could become an enemy without a hint. In the dim light of caverns one couldn’t tell if it was truly night or day unless you lived here all your life, so she wasn’t sure if she was drinking late or early. Maybe it didn’t matter since the rest of the patrons cared not about the topsider sitting in the back of their tavern. What a tavern it was as well; truly one of the largest she has seen but that might have to do with it literally being carved out of the stone wall. Or the fact that it was the only tavern in this city she had seen. Warm hues of gold and brown coloured her sight as fire lit up the place, dwarves moving to and fro or simply vegetating at their table. Two sections made up this hub, the lower part with the entrance, open and crowded with the long bar settled at the side. Giant casks of ale, wine, and much more made their home here and the second section was up a few stairs, a little more secluded with booth like tables to drink privately with fellow patrons or alone, if that was the case. 

Between the slurring and laughter she couldn’t quite tell what song the lone dwarf on stage was belting out but it mattered not to her. Trekking for hours on end through the quarters had left her mental state truly tired, if only for the nonsense that seemed to thrive here. Beginning their daily quest, she had partnered up with Alistair and went through the diamond quarter, or rather known as the noble part of town. Stone buildings carved up reaching a ceiling she could barely see; the architecture was beautiful and intricate in design. The light of scones and the lava flowing down into the lake underneath made it brighter than one would expect of a cavern city. Alas, the nobles of dwarves were just as much of a headache as human ones and she watched as their Gray Warden was talked to death by both parties. Each trying to gain the favour of the heroic order in order to better their standing.

Needless to say, Alistair could only try to gain so much information before they both could use the break, sitting along the commons and watching the merchants hock their wares. Despite the annoyances of this current political climate, the city itself was quite amazing. Built on history, tradition, and stubbornness; the decor and structures were shaped with such attention she swore some of it was not stone at all. Curving and bending alongside the rigid shapes of pillars and walls, ancient dwarven carved into the patterns and signs. Jewelry and weapons lined most of the shops, a nod to the crafts and smithing that dwarves were famous for and the city itself felt like one giant forge. Too bad that none of its parts could work together to make it function properly. The later half had her with the other women, choosing to question along the commons but other than complaints and declarations, the only true answer she could glean was that Alistair and Hue were going to have to pick someone. Hue would probably rather fight the whole Assembly than try to navigate through the political battlefield so it was going to be the human they’d rely on this time...maybe. Speaking of him…

Confusion was not something she was used to feeling, in fact Sibylle prided herself on being quite knowledgeable. Observant. Crafty. Knowledge was power and power kept you alive, kept you on top. Every stumble, every mistake, every hurt was a lesson learned in getting stronger. Wit, magic, speed, intelligence, charm; whatever she needed to use she would have at her disposal. This is how one survived, especially when one was a mage. So how was it a man four years her junior was getting the best of her!

Hue had been interesting; she had seen the light of fate glow as clear as daylight within him. Yes, he was destined for something much larger than himself, finding out he was a Gray Warden had only solidified that. The way it snaked and connected everyone to the elf, how it grew the more he did...the stronger he became. Lights like chains anchoring his companions to his fate, molding it, hardening it. Bonds forging him into a hero in the making, she was sure of it and she could see him affecting the others’ lights as well. What fate had in store for him she couldn’t tell, though...stopping the whole Blight and defeating the Archdemon would be a very good guess. However…

Hue hadn’t been the reason she had joined this little merry band. True he had helped with the tower and in exchange, she helped the Arl’s family. No, the decision to travel with them had solely been because of the other Gray Warden. Sipping on her drink, she wrinkled her brow at thinking on this once again. Alistair’s fate had been unlike everyone else’s; it was blurred, distorted, hidden from her view. Something like this had never happened to her before...it was infuriating. At first she thought he had some talent or special skill but upon getting to know him he was...simply a man. Easy to read at the slightest glance, reactive, emotional, naive...he liked to deflect either when he was feeling uncomfortable or feeling like being a little shit. That last one seemed to be a recent favourite of his around her lately.

Infatuated with her, like men before him. Even a blind person could see that and she could have used that. Seduced him to figure out what he’d supposedly been hiding, find out what she wanted.

But that had felt wrong. A good, clear heart beat in that chest, rare were men in this age who were so honest and kind. To taint that left a sour taste in her mouth. Curious still...why did she see him as a man? Around the same age as Hue and Cullen but she saw those two as boys...like her apprentices as well. Her interests had always laid with people older than herself. Hah, maybe that was her mistake in the first place considering her luck. Oh if those two were here now they’d surely laugh at her frustration... _little shits._

Okay Sibylle, let’s think about this logically. What was it about him other than her not being able to read his fate? He could be so naive, so childish and reckless, with a smart-ass mouth and ability to put thoughts together sometimes a struggle. His appearance...well, that was fine, for one. He was handsome in an adorable way, when he was serious she could see the shape of the man he could become. A hundred expressions coloured his face in one conversation, each interesting to watch. Animated seemed underwhelming to describe him. Sometimes the whining was a little...endearing but other times she wanted to scold him for the headache. His body certainly wasn’t a problem, aside from Sten (and Shale of course), Alistair was one of the most physically strongest here. 

She suddenly remembered him holding her wrists with ease, careful but unbreaking. How easy he could hold her down, trapped under his strength and body and yet his face showed complete submission, ready to heed her very command. Oh. _Oh no_...had she always had a peculiarity for this? Maker, what is this man pulling out from her? Okay then, no use denying it, she was attracted to him and his...odd yet silly sense of humour made her laugh. That still brought her no closer to figuring out why she couldn’t see his fate like everyone else. So wrapped up in her own thoughts she barely heard the sound of armor on stone, walking closer to her with the wafting smell of booze hitting her nose first. Truly a testament to how occupied her mind was.

“You gonna get outta my spot or rot in that seat?”, the belch that followed along with that statement made her grimace.

“Charming. I don’t believe I see your name carved into this seat...nor would I even know since no introductions were even made.”

“Probably hidden under that big pile you call a rear”, he laughs like he’s just said the funniest thing in the whole damn tavern. Well, she won’t be taking shit from a plastered dwarf, that’s for sure.

“So it’s that insignificant that I wouldn’t even notice, is it?”

“You watch your sodding mouth, everyone here knows who I am”, the puffed up pride he displayed fell short with his drunkenness, leaning in a bit, “you could know too you play your cards right.” Laughter wheezed through his mouth and nose and she felt her stomach churn, a hand coming to her lips.

“Absolutely. Disgusting. I do believe I was about to retch.”

“Hard to get eh?”

“Not interested in the slightest... _ever_. And with that, you may have your seat as I want to get away from you as fast as I possibly can. Congratulations.”, not even hiding her disgusted tone, she gets up, giving him a wide berth in order to get to the stairs.

“Good. Damn sodding humans, playing kiss ass to those damn rock-lickers.”, grumbling, he took the seat she just vacated, not even looking at her as she turns back.

“Excuse me?”, no answer and she walked back to the table, leaning on it to get eye level, “have you been watching us?”

“Hah. You think a bunch of humans and their elf won’t be noticed here?”, okay, so he had a point but she wasn’t going to admit that, “Everyone talks and you fools are the latest gossip.”

“Not like we want to. We’re traveling with Gray Wardens and your... _leaders_...have not made an easy time of it”, he grunts and finishes off the drink she left, making her scoff, “since you have such a strong opinion of it, why not share it with me?”

“Unless you can give me a good spit-shine I got nothing to share with you”, throwing her hands up she stormed away from him, boisterous drunken laughter following behind like an annoying melody. Of course he was going to be useless...this whole damn situation was useless. Whatever. Exiting out of the doors she breathes in the less ale permeated air and sighs, rubbing the bridge of her nose. Her name ringing out startles her, snapping her eyes over to the red-head suddenly at her side.

“Here you are. We were wondering where you had gone off to”, Leliana smiled, nudging Sibylle’s arm with her own, “I called out a couple times. It’s unlike you to be so distracted.”

“I got lost in my own thoughts”, smiling back she walks away from the building, casually staying in step with the other as they walk the stalls, “mainly this mess we’ve found ourselves in. I’m glad Alistair seems to be...sorting through it but I feel these men just want us to do their dirty work.”

“Oh, they absolutely do. The Gray Wardens as their personal pawns? What an advantage that would give them”, the rouge chuckled, “I heard from Alistair you suggested Bhelen.”

“If we’re forced to choose then I choose the one with the better plans”, another sigh escapes her lips, words lower now that they were amongst the crowds, “I feel for the casteless, why should they suffer for their parents? Or for simply going above ground?”

“As do I. You’re a lot more politically minded than you let on”, Sibylle had to laugh at that, her own cat-like smile directed at the other.

“Was that a blonde joke?”

“I would never”, Leliana faked a gasp, hand at her chest before giggling and holding onto Sibylle’s arm, “but enough boring talk. Let’s speak of something more fun while we shop!”

“Idle gossip or shoes again?”

“I do adore those conversations but I am much more curious about what I saw earlier today.”, ah, this conversation, she knew it was going to be brought up at some point, “I suppose I am rather curious about your thoughts on our dear Alistair.” While he had been an open book to just about everyone, she was much more guarded, only made sense that would peak the interest of their more nosy companions. 

“My thoughts or intentions?”

“Are they different?”

“Who knows”, she teases and Leliana huffs, making her chuckle, “I’d be a fool if I said I didn’t know his. He’s so glaringly obvious that it’s actually quite refreshing.”

“You do have some fondness for him”, Sibylle raised an eyebrow at that, “or were you not about to kiss him when we found you two?”

“So you deduced that and decided to interrupt anyway. Are we jealous, my dear?”

“Why should Alistair have all the fun?”

“I’m sure he’d throw a fit if he heard you say that”, both women laughed, knowing exactly how the man would probably puff out his cheeks and declare they were being sneaky, especially Leliana. Trouble felt not too far behind her thoughts when she clearly imagined a put-out Alistair, thinking how adorable that would be. Saying any of this out-loud felt like a defeat, one she could not afford as they stood in the middle of a civil war in Orzammar as Ferelden headed to destruction. Hue and Alistair had everything riding on their shoulders and she would not be a deterrent for that. Instead she shifted her thoughts, focusing on the jewelry that her friend was pointing out to her.

“Sooo...do you mind if I ask you a personal question?” Zevran blinked, looking over to the tall yet awkward warden who looked weirdly nervous suddenly. Why, he had no clue, after the women chose to wander off themselves that had left the two of them to group up and explore more parts of the city. Frankly, he’d rather they just take up one of the nobles’ offer and get this over with, put one of them on the throne and carry on. Without Hue here he opted to tease his other companions but it wasn’t as...fun. Though now that they’d been alone for a couple of hours he realised that Alistair wasn’t as much of a prude as he originally thought, just shy about certain things.

“You may ask, but I may choose not to answer.” Teasing the human had seemed to go over his head as Alistair nodded seriously.

“Fair enough.”, clearing his throat he looked just about everywhere except Zevran before finally building up the courage, “Have you...had very many women in your time? I mean...you seem like the sort of man who would…” The elf wanted to laugh, how awkward was Alistair really, but he decided to stay serious and see where this went.

“I have indulged from time to time, perhaps, when my interest is not elsewhere.”

“Right. Well, how do you... _woo them?_ Is there a...technique? Or…” Okay, that got him to stop, looking up at the other with a barely hidden grin.

“”Woo them?” Are you quite serious?” Was this conversation actually happening? Oh, Hue was going to be so mad he missed this. The question seemed to shatter some of Alistair’s confidence because he started fumbling with his gloves, voice edging on unsure.

“Er...yes? I...I don’t know what else to call it.”

“So let me get this straight. You have...never wooed? Not once? You are woo-less, as it were?” It took so much willpower not to start laughing as Alistair’s face blossomed more red with each sentence. Honestly he deserved some praise for showing such restraint, this was equal parts torturous and hilarious. Obviously he knew the human was speaking of the blonde mage, how such a woman found such stumbling attractive was beyond him. Nevertheless, the fact that Alistair decided to ask him this advice was so thoroughly entertaining that he couldn’t stop himself.

“All right. Bad idea. Never mind.” Throwing his hands up in defeat, Alistair started to walk off but Zevran followed close by.

“No, no, wait. This is remarkable. To think I would stumble upon someone who has never once wooed.”, a groan was his answer but he surged forward, “You have certainly aimed high as well, are you sure you would not benefit from a practice run?”

“A...a what?” Stopping, the human looked down at him, obviously confused.

“A practice run, my friend, for wooing. You could practice your attempts on me--”

“Not happening.”

“--or, we could find one of the lovely dwarven ladies who could teach you a thing or two.” Eyes grew wide as he stared down at Zevran like the elf had just lost his mind.

“Are you suggesting...no, absolutely not! I…”, he watched as the human took a deep breath, finding some form of resolve, “No...it has to be her. I...just want it to be her.” Well, this certainly was progress for the fumbling man. Maybe the interesting position the others had found them in on the bench had kick-started his drive and while having just one target felt like a waste to the elf, he certainly wasn’t going to say it. After all, the relationships others had certainly were none of his business but what to do with this. What Alistair wanted in advice was a far cry from what Zevran could possibly provide him...but what fun it would be to see this in action.

“Really? Not to say you don’t have fine taste in women but are you quite sure?”, Alistair nodded and Zevran chuckled, shrugging his shoulders, “And you’ve come to the great Zevran for advice.”

“Well, I mean...it’s different but you and Hue worked out and you’ve had...adventures…”, he blinked, the words catching up to Zevran but not quite making any sense.

“Whoa there, what do you mean “worked out”?”

“You know, how you two are…”, there was a weird expression on Alistair’s face as Zevran’s confusion reached him, “...you two...aren’t together, are you?”

“That would be news to me if we were.”

“Then why...no, never mind. I’ve already embarrassed myself enough as it is. I suppose you’d at least know how to get women to...like...you…”, Alistair trailed off, staring past Zevran into the marketplace with eyes that grew darker each second he looked. The sudden change in the atmosphere had him turn, looking behind to spot the woman in question with their lovely red-headed friend. Arms locked together as they walked closely and giggled, neither one spying them. Turning back he watched as Alistair had already started to walk away in the other direction, gloom seeped into his hunched back as he stormed off. _Great._ Not something he really wants to deal with right now, this is why he avoids that mess called love. Hopefully Wynn will take the reins on this one.

Walking out of the house, Hue lets out a sigh of relief, sword held against his shoulder. The thing was pretty much as tall as he was and beautifully designed. Even if it was heavy, the weight that had resided on his shoulders had finally lifted and he walked over to his small group, a grin on his face.

“One sword for Sten!”, letting the Qunari take the sword from him, he watched as the man held it gently in his hand, looking over the blade with real fondness.

“Strange. I had almost forgotten it. Completion.”, another moment of holding it before Sten sheathes the blade to his back, returning it to its home, “Are you sure you are a Gray Warden?”

“Uh, last time I checked, yea.”

“I think you must be an Ashkaari to find a single lost blade in a country at war.”, despite his confusion on what an ashkaari even was, his question was halted on his lips when Sten, of all people, actually smiled down at him. There was a proud look in the older man’s eyes and it made him smile back, happy to finally see his large friend express something other than stoic or annoyance.

“You’re welcome, Sten.”

“I would thank you for this, if I knew how.”, before Hue could even answer that Sten chuckled, a warm resolve lining his face, “And I could deliver a much more satisfying answer to the Arishok’s question if the Blight were ended, don’t you agree?” Letting the gears in his head turn, excitement shot through his body at the underlying meaning and he jumped. Large hands caught him before he could land a hug on the giant but that only made Hue laugh, way too happy at the idea that not only was Sten staying, but he seemed to finally accept the elf completely now.

“Of course!”

“Good. I am going to set you down now.”, true to his word, the Qunari set him down much gentler than Sten would have done earlier in their time. Maybe trying to hug the man was a little much but he couldn’t help it, Sten had been a stone he had slowly been chipping away at. Learning little by little but only when the man had deemed it necessary to do so. The acknowledgment filled his veins with warmth, singing through his nerves at the validation. 

“If we are done with this task at hand, shall we return? Hopefully we will not find Orzammar in ruins just yet”, Morrigan’s voice broke through, making him realise Shale and her had still been standing there the whole time. Oh well, he was honestly too happy to feel embarrassed. With a nod they started their trek right away, crossing over the bridge that led away from the village.

“Does it always try to climb others when it feels happiness?” Shale’s question made him laugh, hands behind his head as he walked next to them.

“What’s the matter Shale? Did you want a hug too?”

“A disgusting notion.” Shale’s scoff only made him laugh louder.

“Hey, do you really not remember what happened to you?”

“Is it always so tiresome with it’s questions?”

“You have no idea.” Sten piped up but Hue only grinned, looking up at Shale with expectancy. Eventually the stare was enough to bore through their patience.

“The people in the village said you killed your old master…”

“Oh? How interesting. Certainly I remember having a master. My memories of what happened to him...are vague.” Hue snorted at that.

“Uh-huh...but you still remember something.” 

“Clever...and true”, a deep sigh escapes the golem, the crystals weaving with a shake of their shoulders, “Very well. Let me see what I can recall. My former master enjoyed experimenting upon me. I remember that much. There was...tinkering with spells, and then the crystals. He was very eager to alter my function, I think. He possessed my control rod, and back then it would have prevented me from doing anything he did not command me to. No matter how I might have wished to.”

“I’m so sorry”, Hue’s hands had moved to his sides, looking up at his stone friend with a mixture of pity and anger for them. To not be able to control yourself while someone experimented on you, treated you like an object. No wonder Shale was so bitter about the people around them, how could you trust anyone after that kind of treatment?

“Whatever is it apologizing for?”

“That’s awful that you had to put up with that!”, there was a beat of silence as glowing eyes stared down at him. Without much other movement in their face Hue had absolutely no idea what they were thinking.

“Quite”, turning their eyes back forward, they continued with their story, “ So what happened? I am unsure. He was experimenting and then...nothing.”

“Nothing?”

“There was...pain? I do not feel it as soft creatures do, so the memory is an odd one. And then he was gone. I was standing where I was, in the village. And I could no longer move. The villagers came, poked and prodded me in fear, and then realised they could neither move me or destroy me...so they simply left me. And in time I forgot I hadn’t stood there all along.”

“That must have been terrible…”, Shale only let out a laugh, amusement lacing their tone.

“Ha! In fact, at first I found it more of a relief. For so many years, I’d had to leap to that little toadstool’s every command! Get this! Pick up that! Put it down! Pick it up again!”, their voice became more animated as they continued, “The gall! At first, I’d hoped he’d simply decided to leave me there, paralyzed. An acceptable trade-off. After years passed, I simply stopped caring.”

“At least you had a good rest?”

“I think I was ready to move on. Another few years and the moss would have covered my face...and then where would I have been? Whatever the mage did seemed to render the control rod useless. For which I should be thankful, yes?”

“Of course! I’m glad you decided to join us though! And you’re free with us!”

“Obviously I am and had I not joined it, it might eventually become paste against the side of a stone.” 

“Hey!”, Morrigan started to laugh when Hue’s voice cracked, watching his face twist in annoyance, “I can handle myself.”

“With that squishy body? Perish the thought”, Hue patted his own chest, looking down at himself and then back at Shale.

“Well, we can’t all be made out of stone but I think I do pretty well for myself.”

“I suppose. It is still alive, if that could be accounted for anything.” 

“That is what I told him”, Morrigan laughed again, grinning at the way he started to pout.

“Now you’re both just picking on me”, crimson eyes turned their gaze to his qunari friend, looking up with some hope, “you don’t think I’m gonna end up dead do you?”

“The future is an indeterminable thing”, the groan let loose from the elf filled the air, making even his more stoic companions chuckle a bit. Despite him pouting over their absolutely wrong opinion of him not being able to handle himself, he did feel...oddly content. Being able to tease and poke fun at each other with an easy atmosphere, it had been a while since he’d felt such a comfortable thing. Not just with these three either, but the whole group was beginning to draw closer to him...to each other. With each new relationship the ache of not being with his clan started to lessen, almost as if he was forming his very own clan with them all. Maybe not that close but for right now, he’d trust each of them with his back at least...and that was saying something.

“Do you think the others have succeeded in getting rid of that incessant chatterbox of an elf?” Morrigan chided, looking over to Sten who gave a small huff.

“We can only hope.”

“At least pick on Zevran when he can defend himself.”, Morrigan scoffed at that.

“He cannot even pick a lock with his so-called “dexterous hands”, how could he gather enough wit to defend himself?”

“ _Wow!_ ” He felt bad for laughing at that but it was kind of funny how Zevran had hyped up how skilled he was with locks only to waste ten minutes and eight lockpicks on one before Hue took over. Of course the Antivan played it off but Hue caught the slight embarrassment on his face as he was shoved over. The memory enveloped him with a giddy feeling, fondness creeping into his bones as for a while after Zevran tried to convince him it was a fluke or something. One of the rare times he had been caught off guard, it seems, and it had been endearing. Damn, now he wishes he would have thought to offer Zevran lessons and see how the assassin would have spinned that.

“It is making an odd face again.”, Hue blushed but then stuck out his tongue at Shale, walking a little further ahead.

“I always look like this!”

“Tragic.”

Pacing back and forth in his room, hands clasped together in front of his face as he let out a groan, Alistair just felt awful. Okay, so maybe stomping away from Zevran and leaving the elf in the middle of town hadn’t been...great of him. It wasn’t his fault that Alistair ended up seeing something he...didn’t want to see but his emotions had grabbed hold of him, taking control and sending him off. Maker, did he hate when they got the best of him. Why did just seeing that make him feel so complicated? Leliana and Sibylle were friends! Close friends, with Leliana holding on to her closely and being able to laugh so casually, talk so easily with her and damnit, here comes that feeling again.

He wasn’t stupid, well, sometimes he was, but not in this case. Jealousy was something he had felt before in much more different situations when he was younger, watching other recruits get letters from family that actually cared about them. Somewhere along the line jealousy had turned to acceptance, he just had to accept the fact that he hadn’t been wanted and that was just how his life was. This, however, what was he supposed to do about this? Alright, maybe he couldn’t say he...well, _loved_ her, they had gotten closer but not that close. Like her, yes, he definitely liked her and she was beautiful and oh, he just remembered when she was over him. Time to sit down now.

This was a hell of a thing to get his mind caught up in when they needed to sort the dwarves out and the literal end of the world might be drawing upon them. It’s just...he’s never wanted someone like this before and when she smiles at him, teases him or even scolds him, it gives him such a high he could bust through twenty hordes of darkspawn on his own. Maybe he actually wouldn’t do that but he definitely felt it! Did Leliana feel the same? Were they just close friends or did the red-head like Sibylle as well? Maker, did he stand a chance if they were after the same woman? 

“Alistair?” He almost jumps five feet in the air, eyes snapping open as he realises he was hunched over, sitting on the edge of his bed, face in his hands. Blue eyes looked over to him as Sibylle stood in the doorway.

“Sorry, I didn’t hear you…”

“Zevran said you weren’t feeling so well, I could go get Wynn if you’re feeling sick?”, Did that sly elf just cover his ass for him? Maybe he should give the Antivan more credit than he does.

“I just...was feeling a bit overwhelmed, that’s all.”

“Ah...do you need lyrium or?”, he blinks, confused for a moment why she would be offering and then it hits him. Right, ex-templar and she’s a circle mage so she’d obviously know.

“No, no, I never took it. Never got to that stage before being conscripted”, the bed dips next to him and she’s suddenly there, not close enough to touch but enough he can feel her presence spread over his skin, “We are given lyrium to help develop our “magical talents”, so says the Chantry. Which means templars become addicted and the Chantry feels perfectly justified. You don’t need lyrium in order to learn and use the Templar talents, I use them well enough without it. Lyrium just makes templar talents more effective or so I was told. Maybe it doesn’t even do that. The Chantry usually doesn’t let their templars get away to divulge those secrets...I’m a bit of an exception. _Lucky me_.” The tangent was an odd one, he’s not sure why he suddenly felt the need to spout all that and in front of her of all people. Maybe he wanted to be angry about something, letting the bitterness leak out in other subjects that have burned his nerves. Maybe he was hoping she'd understand, sympathize, and he wouldn't feel the need to ask awkward questions about Leliana.

“You feel strongly about that”, it was more of a statement than a question and he felt a hand on his back, warmth seeping through, “but I don’t think that’s why you’re sulking in here.”

“Now I’m sulking?”, he hadn’t meant for it to come out as harsh as it did and he couldn’t look at her, missing the way she blinked at him.

“Do you wish for me to leave?”, the softness of her voice made him anxious, flipping his irritation to nervousness.

“No, I...I didn’t mean. Maker’s breath, I’m sorry.”, the long sigh escaped through his nose, “Maybe I was just hoping this would be easier. The dwarves usually have such a good relationship with Gray Wardens, I wasn’t exactly prepared for all of... _this._ ”

“To be fair, I don’t believe any of us were.”

“Yes, but at least you’re smart…”

“Alistair!”, the snap of her voice had him sit up, eyes wide at such a stern tone, “Stop that. You’re not stupid. Nobody expects you to be on top of everything, we certainly aren’t. With the amount you and Hue have had to shoulder, you’ve managed far better than most would have. Give yourself more credit.” Rapping her knuckle against his forehead, he feels that overwhelming sense of awe again. Her words turn the tides of emotions so easily, that single smile melting away the previous gloom shadowing his heart. Aside from Hue, who else has told him so directly that he was doing a good job? The praise sent a soft chuckle from his chest, gently filling the air between them.

“Have I found you out? That you don’t think I’m such an idiot?”

“Simple sometimes, but not an idiot...no.”

“Ouch…”, his smile never left though, the elation that she could see he was doing his best, the validation of it releasing his tension, “Such a cruel lady I find myself in the presence of but I will take my compliments where I can get them.” His head tilts slightly at the way she’s staring at him, there’s a quirk of a smile on her lips but it feels like she’s taking him apart, stripping away to see something he can’t even fathom.

“I suppose you should.”

“What’s this? Have you finally admitted defeat? She thinks to herself, “I’ve been a fool all along to not see what was in front of me!””

“I don’t _sound_ like that! Your Orelsian accent is atrocious!”

“Your Ferelden one is pretty spotty yourself, my lady!”, he laughs as she pinches his arm but there’s a smile on her face at least, like she’s not sure whether to scold him or laugh with him, “ And now you think, ah, how could I have possibly missed such a prize right at my feet?”

“Maybe you should stay down there then”, the choked noise that rattled through his throat caught him off guard, a lop-sided grin caked in confusion directed at her, “but I do suppose you have that prince thing going for you.”

“Damn, did I just find the one good thing about my birthright?”, he sputtered out, a nervous chuckle following that sentence as he was still reeling from the last thing. Suddenly he felt fingers through his hair, running through it gently as her teasing smile softened up, shoulders relaxing into the feeling of her nails gently going along his scalp. It was almost euphoric...when was the last time someone had patted his head? Sadly, it only lasted for a minute before she was standing up again, brushing her hair back over her shoulder.

“It’ll be fine, you know, you have the rest of us”, crossing his arms, he fights the urge to pull her back down, she was just so close, “and as much as I hate to ruin the good mood you’ve gotten into, it seems Bhelen wishes to speak to you about some gang.” Letting out a comically long groan, he flops back on his bed, eyes up to the ceiling. Damn, he really did not want to go back out into that.

“If I do a good job, do I get a kiss or something?” The words left his mouth before he could stop them, worried that maybe he had said something too far until her soft laughter washed over him.

“Maybe, but that requires you to get up and come on”, he laid there dazed for a moment, hearing her footsteps leave the room but not registering them. His thoughts all halted to one single sentence. _Did she really mean that?_

“Wait? Really?!” Springing up he found himself alone in the room, blushing up to his ears. Maker, was he really this easy? Who was he kidding, of course he was. He’d sort the...weirdness with Leliana later but right now even just the thought of that reward would have had him sit through the whole dwarven assembly if he had to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt better about this chapter more so than sixteen but also I felt it was around the right time to actually write from Sibylle's perspective. I held it off because her reasoning and thoughts held some information that will become relevant much later in the story. The best way to describe her is she's a witch like Morrigan, but different magic. Also sorry these last two focused more on Alistair and Sibylle, one Hue gets back there's going to be the whole Deep Roads and much more between Hue and Zevran so I wanted to start setting these two up. *Development*


	18. Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “There are many who don't wish to sleep for fear of nightmares. Sadly, there are many who don't wish to wake for the same fear.”― Richelle Goodrich

Physical exhaustion had never really bothered him, in fact he’d tell anyone that it was simply the mark of jobs well done. A day of hunting or chores, exploring the woods and scouting for food or enemy. It brought restful sleep to wake up once more and do it all over again. Sometimes he almost missed the repetitive tasks he’d get stuck with, knowing exactly what was expected of him and being able to do it easily. Sometimes.

Right now was definitely one of those times he missed it. As soon as his small party had come back to Orzammar there had been no rest for him. Alistair had filled him in on what was going on; the politics, the jobs, taking out an underground gang, and getting as much information as they all could. There was no hiding the expression on his face when he was told it was basically up to them to decide Orzammar’s new king. As if someone had stuck bitter herbs into his food or told him he had to kiss a darkspawn. Just awful.

Mental exhaustion was not something he had been used to and honestly he’d rather not play politics. So when they had been dismissed until further notice from Bhelen’s presence he made a beeline straight back to the inn they were all staying. As tired as he was from the trip and the headache he had gathered, he was on a mission and he dared not stray from it. No, this was a personal mission and today was the day he was going to stop dancing around with the other elf. At least one of them had to finish this...start this? Whatever. Luck happened to be on his side as he was told that Zevran was in his room. Good.

Nerves swam through his body with each step he got to the other’s room, wondering if this was a good idea or if the time was right. Had he ever been so doubtful? What time would even be right? Why was he even nervous about this in the first place? They had to take their chances as they had them or else lose them, it may be peaceful now but for all they know darkspawn could literally bust from the seams of the caverns and flood them all.

He silently pleaded to the Gods to not let that happen because that would really suck right now.

Hesitant for just a moment, he shook his head and knocked on the door, hearing the muffle voice behind the large stone before it opened. Seeing who it was the Antivan adopted his signature grin, looking more relaxed as the main parts of his armor were off. Guess he felt less guarded in a closed off room with only one entrance. Wait, he wasn’t here to just stare at the other.

“Hey, uh...can we talk?”

“For you, of course”, stepping to the side Zevran let the other man in, shutting the door behind him. As soon as he heard the door close the nerves came back, sending weird sensations up his back and swirling in his stomach heavier than the taint ever did. Why was he so nervous to bring this up? It wasn’t like Zevran was going to reject the idea, the man had made it known almost day one that he was interested. Legs felt jittery, he wanted to start pacing in the room, move around and damn, why couldn’t they be in the forest where he could run or climb a tree? Why was he in a stone-built room, no windows, all alone with the person he had desperately wanted to see but also now run away from and why is Zevran blocking the damn exit?! Okay, breathe, maybe talking for a bit will allow him to bring it up, Creators know the Antivan makes mention of it when he can.

“I was wondering if...you could tell me more of your adventures”, well, no, not what he wanted to say but he sat down on the edge of the bed, trying to appear as calm as he could. With the way Zevran raised an eyebrow at him he probably didn’t succeed but maybe they could just pretend.

“Ah, missed the sound of my voice after being gone for so long, yes?”

“Yea…”, well, he wasn’t lying, he actually did and he liked to hear the other’s stories anyway. Zevran leaned back against the door, obviously barring his exit for the time being and crossed his arms.

“Well…”, there was a pause there as brown eyes looked at something that wasn’t there, “the only one that’s really worth telling is the story of the mission right before I came to Ferelden.” Tilting his head he leaned forward a little, wondering what kind of crazy shenanigans he would hear this time. However Zevran...seemed hesitant and wasn’t smiling anymore, looking Hue over.

“Well?”

“...no, I...I would rather not. I shouldn’t have said anything.” Curiosity hit him harder than Ruffles but there was a rare moment of Zevran looking...worried. Regretful? The seriousness of it quelled any needling that Hue wanted to start, if there was something the other didn’t feel comfortable sharing right now he’d have to accept that. After all, he himself was hiding certain stories too...it was only fair.

“I understand, you don’t have to tell it if you don’t want to.” Relief seemed to wash over Zevran’s face with a soft smile, it was unguarded and made the heavy feeling in his stomach suddenly feel jittery. Like he’d just swallowed a bunch of butterflies and they were threatening to escape. Like he wanted to see more of that.

“Thank you. Perhaps another day”, sincerity laced that sentence before he slowly approached Hue, smirk tracing along his lips once more, “but certainly you wished for something since you have sought me out. Were my stories all that you were seeking?”

“You have pretty fun stories”, there was a hum from the Antivan, crossing his arms as he waited for Hue to continue, “Well...I was, uh...wondering if...if you wanna join me...in bed?” Damnit, he really wanted to sound smooth when he said this but screw it, he’s said it anyway and why does his face feel warm? It felt like the lava was pouring into his veins as he watched that smirk grow much more smug.

“Well, it is hardly our bedtime…”

“ _Zevran_ …”

“Is there something in your bed that needs assassinating? That is my speciality, or so I’m told.” Oh come on, he literally gave Zevran this on a platter and the assassin still wanted to mess with him. With a click of his tongue, he rolled his eyes, firing back at the other.

“I’m sure you’re good at a lot of things, or so you’ve said.”

“Hmm. That is quite an offer, especially coming from another man…”, hands dipped on the comforter at his sides, coming nose to nose with the Antivan very quickly, “if we are both speaking of the same thing.” Voice lowered, it came close to what Hue remembered from that dream and he wanted to feel the vibration on his skin. Nerves singed throughout his body but he didn’t want to run anymore. He wanted the warmth coming off the other’s body against his own, breath teasing along his lips to mix with his. 

“We probably are…”, clearing his throat he felt his heart racing in chest, excitement charging every part of his skin as Zevran leaned slowly in. Gripping the comforter in his fingers his eyes slowly closed, they were so close now...until a loud series of knocks made his eyes snap open, pulling back out of instinct. 

“Hey Zevran, is Hue with you?” Alistair’s voice clearly cut through the thick, stone door and dissipated any heat that had began to rise. 

“ _Son of a…_ ”, Zevran growled, actually growled through his teeth and Hue couldn’t help the chuckle that slipped out. Whether it was by Alistair’s awful timing or Zevran’s undisguised annoyance now aimed at the door he couldn’t tell. Granted, he kind of wanted to pretend the other Warden wasn’t there and just continue but since, well...everything was at stake, it was best if he answered the door. Slipping past Zevran, he opened the door, looking right up at the oblivious human. 

“Oh, there you are! Bhelen wanted to see us about something “very important””, he snorted at the other warden’s mocking tone. That figures, of course the dwarven noble chose now to get them, well this had better be good. Looking back he shoots Zevran an apologetic smile.

“Sorry...later?”

“Obviously”, that was a promise laced with fact and said with a smile that sent a pleasurable shiver up his spine. Now he was mentally cursing Bhelen for this, hoping whatever they were needed for could be settled quickly. 

“Did I...interrupt something?”, Alistair’s confusion was offset by the annoyed glare Zevran sent him, as if the assassin was trying to murder him with it, “Why are you glaring at me like that?! What, were you two about to... _oh._ ” The way the human’s face morphed from defensive to downright embarrassed, red blossoming his cheeks, would have been hilarious if not for the now unreleased tension in the Antivan’s body. Watching him scurry away, Zevran hoped whatever business they had would be over and done with and mentally noted to trip Alistair up later on.

Sadly, later never came. Bhelen’s task had actually been important this time, they were to travel further into the Deep Roads and find someone called a Paragon. Apparently if she chose someone it could end all this fighting once and for all and if that was the case, Hue would happily go find her. Not that he was looking forward to it too much, the Deep Roads were filled with all sorts of creatures, including darkspawn, but what was worse was how...enclosed it was. No sky, foliage, light...everything was dim and stone and stale and tightly packed in. None of it sounded appealing in the least but he had to endure, they all had to so they could get back on track. Still didn’t mean he had to like it. Scrunching his nose up, he looked at the map given to them before he heard a low, growling voice booming from behind.

“Ugh, not this one again”, Sibylle’s disdainful tone had him whip his head around, wondering who could make their mage friend make such a face. A dwarven man came to stand before them, decked out in heavy-plate armor and a large warhammer strapped to his back. His reddish, spiky hair fell down into a full mustache and beard that almost swallowed his face. Despite being a bit shorter than him the dwarf was stout and Hue had no doubt the man could easily throw him if he so desired. 

“There you are! I thought that woman said something about a Gray Warden, but for some reason I’d chalked it up to the drink”, catching his breath he waved dismissively at Sibylle before continuing, “I know you’re down here to look for Branka, and uh...I need to ask a favour.”

“Uh, I mean, who are you first?” Hue scratched his cheek, the name of the Paragon was Branka, right? So that meant this man was also looking for her or...something else.

“Name’s Oghren, and if you’ve ever heard of me before, it’s probably all been about how I piss ale and kill little boys who look at me wrong”, a gruff laugh spilled from his lips and Hue tried to think really hard if he had heard that name but came up blank.

“Sorry, I just got here recently…”

“I’ve heard of him”, Alistair raised his hand, “He was fighting with someone in the quarter and Zevran and I got to hear some lovely gossip.”

“Well, it’s mostly true, but the part they never say is how I’m the only one still trying to save our only Paragon! And if you’re looking for Branka, I’m the only one who knows what she was looking for, which might be pretty sodding helpful in finding her.” Oh, that actually would be helpful and he’s sure Oghren would know more about the Deep Roads here than the rest of them. Maybe this trip would be a lot faster than he thought.

“No, now wait a minute”, Sibylle cut in, shaking her head, “are we really going to trust him? The drunk stinks of rotten ale and I’m sure his words are just as festered.”

“I was talking to the Gray Warden, not some prissy, painted-up mage, show some respect, woman!”

“Oh, because you _obviously_ know what the definition of respect is, such a shining example of it!”

“Whoa, whoa...hold on”, Hue held his hands out, looking between the two in confusion before sliding over to Alistair who looked just as confused, “uh, I take it you two met already?”

“I’ve had the unfortunate experience, yes…”

“Okay, well, uh...if he does know something then we should hear him out, we kind of need all the help we can get”, Sibylle looked ready to argue but conceded to Hue with a wave of her hand, which he was really thankful for. He’s sure if that had kept up they’d have a pretty crispy dwarf on their hands.

“Listen, I know what Branka wanted and how she was looking. You, I assume, know whatever Bhelen’s men have dug up on where exactly she disappeared. If we pool our knowledge, we stand a chance of finding Branka. Otherwise, good sodding luck.” 

“Well, he did give us a map…”, he trailed off but even he knew a good guide was better than just a map any day of the week.

“Branka was a brilliant girl, but half the time she’d add two and two and make it fifty. You want to find her, you need someone who knows how she thinks.”

“And we’re to believe you would know how any woman thinks?”, Sibylle scoffed, rolling her eyes.

“Course I do! She’s my sodding wife!”, Oghren jabbed a finger towards Sibylle but the two only managed to glare at each other like a cat and a dog ready for a brawl. As much as Hue wanted to avoid this...arguing (and how were they worse than Alistair and Morrigan, they had just met), he knew he couldn’t leave either one behind. Well, he supposed if he was going to be the leader then maybe they should start listening to him like one.

“Alright, stop it already!”, crossing his arms he regarded the two in front of him, trying his best to imitate his Keeper’s stern expression, “Ohgren’s probably our best bet in getting this done right and quickly, so he’s coming with us. Just...try not to argue or even talk to each other, if that helps?” Crossing her own arms Sibylle looked down at him with a thoughtful look, as if she were reading something etched in his eyes. With a thoughtful hum, she shrugged her shoulders, looking away.

“Fine, the faster we get this over with, the faster we can all leave it behind.”

“You should know that Branka was looking for the Anvil of the Void, the secret to building golems, which was lost centuries ago. The smith Caridin built it, and with it, Orzammar had a hundred years of peace, while it was protected by the golems forged on the Anvil. As far as anyone knows, the Anvil was built in the old Ortan Thaig. Branka planned to start looking there, if she could ever find it. All she knew was that it was past Caridin’s Cross. No one’s seen that thaig for five hundred years. ” Hearing that kind of information had him perk up, looking over to their stone friend with excitement.

“Oh, this map tells us how to get there! Hey Shale, maybe that has something to do with you!”

“Perhaps or perhaps it does not.” Hue rolls his eyes, turning back to Oghren with his signature grin.

“Alright Oghren, lead the way!”

Contrary to his belief, he was pleasantly surprised to find out that the tunnels were actually not all that small or closed in. In fact, sometimes he could not see the ceiling in certain, spacious areas while others were shaped and formed in waves and points. Sharp rocks dangled in some places, threatening in their shape but securely molded to their surface. The first thaigs were well-lit; warm and golden as they broke through a few hordes of genlock. Here he could see the dwarven history, shattered but standing strong with the ruins melting into the caverns and tunnels around. If Oghren hadn’t been with them he didn’t know how long they would have been twisting and turning further underground.

Smells worked differently here. Sure, sometimes he’d pick up the scent of blood or rot from the darkspawn or creatures feeding. However...that was it and sounds were no better, how they bounced and echoed off the stone. Vibrating to and fro where he couldn’t quite place where the start and end were. It bothered him...he felt bound by the way smells just lingered in spots, never trailing or moving. Wind was non-existent and the plants that did grow beneath the earth were mostly fungus or moss, stationary yet choking out whatever smells could have made their home there. While his eyes were better suited to the dark compared to a human, everything just ended up looking the same. Rock formation bled into more rock formation, sometimes they made certain shapes but he was very blind to how it all worked.

Footsteps echoed in the eerie silence of stone and the occasional cry of a creature, the further down they descended the darker it became. Torches helped provide light in the corners darkness made its home and in the larger areas a blue, hazy light lit up the stone, casting heavy shadows across the way. Old buildings, like small towns, were smooth and square, decorated with the old dwarven insignias that laced Orzammar. Traveling through the ghosted roads they fought their way deeper still, stumbling upon a camp buried within a spider’s lair. Here they managed to find some of Branka’s diary, making Oghren ecstatic and giving them the strength to push on. How long have they been going? Taking breaks when they needed it, everyone too on edge to properly rest. Has it been hours? A day? Maybe more, time really had no meaning.

Thoughts on whether time was important or when they were ever going to get there came to a halt as they spilled out into another cavern. If anything, it was about just like any other cavern they’ve stumbled into but this place made his blood freeze. He had seen this place before, been here before, not physically no but in his dreams. Ignoring the voices of his friends he raced to the edge of the cliff, peering down below into the grotesque river running at the bottom of the gorge. Except that wasn’t just any river...it was thousands of darkspawn spilling through, marching with purpose and torches into the tunnels below. The same one he’d seen play in his mind again and again, accompanied by the nightmare itself flying overhead and roaring enough to send pieces of stone crashing to the floor.

Unknowingly they had stumbled right into the lair of the Archdemon, hiding amongst the rocks as they watched with fearful gazes the torn beast stretch its wings. Claws dug into the stone surface like it was merely dirt, releasing its perch to fly off further into the endless caverns. Where to, nobody knew and while they had to press on Alistair and him exchanged a knowing look. Fear was evident, for who wouldn’t fear the very Nightmare that plagued them, but also steely understanding. If it came down to it, they would stand, but for now they carried on with their original plan, hoping to not run into the corrupted beast. 

With directions from the Legion of the Dead, an order of dwarves who gave up their lives and identities to hold back darkspawn, they ventured forth into ruins that must have stood a hundred feet tall. The name no longer uttered on lips but a fortress still impressive to behold. At least to him it felt that large, the doors themselves were the size of three Ogres tall, if Ogres could piggyback on each other’s shoulders. Luckily either time or something else had dug a tunnel into the compound so they didn’t have to figure out how to open such a grand entrance. All the better since the place was home to hordes upon hordes of darkspawn. While it felt good to plow through each one with the anger fueling him, it also was starting to wear down on everyone. How much more did they have to go? Were darkspawn just endless? Where were they even coming from? 

He wished he never had to know the answer that would swiftly come upon them, as they carefully traveled through another lit tunnel. The smell of rot was stronger here, flesh barnacles oozing from the walls the further in and his heart raced, the circle coming to mind. The most unsettling thing wasn’t the memories or even the smell or pods, but the monotone voice drifting down to them as they tread further in.

_First day, they come and catch everyone._

_Second day, they beat us and eat some for meat._

_Third day, the men are all gnawed on again._

_Fourth day, we wait and fear for our fate._

_Fifth day, they return and it’s another girl’s turn._

_Sixth day, her screams we hear in our dreams._

_Seventh day, she grew as in her mouth they spew._

_Eighth day, we hated as she is violated._

_Ninth day, she grins and devours her kin._

_Now she does feast, as she’s become the beast._

Fear hadn’t felt like this before. Usually it strikes through him, lightning coursing through his veins and screaming at him to run or fight or do something. No, this was a fear of understanding that froze his very blood, paralysing him to the spot as he looked upon the room filled with bloody meat and barnacles. Ooze and puss discolored parts of the red and pink flesh, protrusions almost bone-like ripped from out of them like grotesque claws. 

The smell overpowered him, flooding his nose and sinking down to his stomach, hitting the acid like rotted stones. It was everywhere; diseased death stung his eyes as the mixture of what was once dwarf melted into the distinct smell of corruption that only darkspawn have. Sick. Sick, he was going to be sick and he wanted to drop to his knees, emptying it all out just for the slim chance it all went away but the sight of a dwarven lady shook him back. For a moment he was glad to see something normal in all this decay, until she turned her face to him and he saw the sunken eyes bleached a putrid yellow with pupils gone, replaced with rimmed reds and purples like bruises. Seeing and unseeing as it took her moments for her to realise he was just as real as she was.

“What is this? An elf? Exotic and impossible”, her dead-like tone almost made him shiver, fighting the urge to run as she stepped closer, “ Feeding time brings only kin and clan. I am cruel to myself. You are a dream of strangers’ faces and open doors.” Her speech, stilted as it was, was at least intelligent and calm and that let his body unclench his throat. Golden light from torches made the room look more grimy but allowed him to look her over. She was pale, sick, and covered in dark blotches. Hair stringy with caked in dirt and blood and her clothes darkened with the same, rusted metal latches holding tight to leather and cloth.

“This is darkspawn corruption…”, Hue blinks, suddenly remembering his friends were with him and he could see various faces of horror and discomfort as they looked around the room. Alistair had been the one to speak, in a tone softened with fearful awe as he gazed upon the woman. She didn’t turn to him though, in fact, she seemed to stare at nobody in particular.

“First day, they come and catch everyone.”

“W...what does that mean?”

“It’s what I’ve seen. What I will become. I force it into verse so it is fantasy, unreal. That’s the only place I can hide, because they make me...they make me eat. And then…”, Hue resisted a shudder, looking at the “things” she was being made to eat, “All I could do was wish Laryn went first. I wished it upon her so that I would be spared. But I had to watch. I had to see the change. How do you endure that? How did Branka endure?” He was sure if she could, tears would be flowing from her once working eyes, a deep sadness gilded in fear coloured her every word. The urge to reach out and comfort her started to swell in his chest but he dared not to because he didn’t know what she was any longer...because she was no longer a dwarf it seemed.

“What changes? What are they doing?”

“What they are allowed to do. What they think they must. And Branka… Her lover, and I could not turn her. Forgive her...but no, she cannot be forgiven. Not for what she did. Not for what she has become.”

“What did she do?”

“I will not speak of her! Of what she did, of what we have become! I will not turn!”, Hue backed up a little as she became louder, tone sharp with anger, “I will not become what I have seen! Not Laryn! Not Branka!” Without warning she sprinted off past the group, breaking towards the new set of tunnels...of new graves and relics they have yet to encounter. He knew they had to follow her, to find where Branka was and to know what happened. The eerie feeling of it all only strengthened when he heard Sibylle’s voice behind him.

“I have...a very bad feeling we are going to find out something we wished we never knew…”

_She became obsessed...This is the word, but it is not strong enough. Blessed Stone, there was nothing left in her but the Anvil._

It was hard following behind, her voice made her seem here and there all at once and every so often they ran into another sweep of darkspawn. Even Oghren couldn’t quite tell where it all began and ended, unfamiliar with this place. She was the only one who knew these corners and cracks, navigating in layers of brown and grime but her voice allowed them some trial and they followed. Her words sunk deeper each time, filing them with realisations they did not even dream of.

_We tried to escape, but they found us. They took us all, turned us…_

Turn into what? Into food? Into...no, his mind did not want to fill in that blank and they pressed on. More darkspawn, more obstacles but the fear and anger fueled them and they could no longer turn back. They had to see this through.

_The men, they kill...they’re merciful. But the women, they want. They want to touch, to mold, to change until you are filled with them…_

No, no, Creators, was this really true? Were they really? Pressing on, harder, into further tunnels steeped with pods and flesh.

_They took Laryn. They made her eat the others, our friends. She tore off her husband’s face and drank his blood._

There was a visible layer of disgust and tension amongst the group but he needed to find this woman, he needed to reach their end. Truth this vile was hard to face but he needed to know...what became of them.

_And while she ate, she grew. She swelled and turned gray and she smelled like them. They remade her in their image. Then she made more of them._

“Maker, please let this not be real”, he heard Leliana’s whisper loud and clear, the line between disbelief and fear a thin one at this point. Glancing back he could see Leliana and Wynn’s faces have distorted to a level of disgusted fear and even Morrigan and Sibylle looked pale, uncomfortable. It didn’t even take his nose to smell that the stench was stronger down here, turning through the long corridor until collagulated ooze and blood stained the floor beneath them. Treading carefully, he heard the sounds of squelching before looking up and before them all sat a nightmare that would be burned in their memories for as long as they lived. A guttural roar echoed around them as the large, undulating beast that spewed in anger only had to be one thing…

_Broodmother…_

It took all their combined efforts to fell the beast, what seemed like forever was probably only minutes but beaten, sludged, and sore they gasped for breath over the now lumpy corpse. Seeing it for the first time had been enough to horrify them; the creature was all skin and sag. Tremendous in size, Hue could see it for what it was...this was the birther, the thing that gave new darkspawn their life...or created them from others? Like a queen in a hive, it was too large to move on its own, multiple udders along it’s forefront for...feeding? Like most beasts when they birth a litter perhaps, it was swollen yet sagging. Eyes sunken into a flat face and the wrinkles that were its lips were pulled-back, revealing yellow and shattered teeth in a gnarly, drooling mouth of exposed gums. 

Massive tentacles shot out from its body, sending them flying into the walls or smashing them into the ground. It spewed something acidic and green at them, the smell making him light-headed as he fought through the pain and chaos. Cries shattered the grunts and yells, calling forth darkspawn like insects come to defend their queen. Fire, Ice, Entropy lit up staves in various forms; burning the purplish pink skin. The sounds of metal slashing through flesh, of blood flying through the air, of arrows finding their marks with a sickening sound as the heads embedded themselves in created a horrifying symphony amongst the roars and screams. 

With it’s chaotic beginning the fight died out in anxious silence when it croaked out its last breath, deflating itself into a pile. The victory felt hollow, however, as realisation washed over them on what they had just learned...what they had just fought.

“That’s where they come from. That’s why they hate us...that’s why they need us. That’s why they take us...that’s why they feed us. But the true abomination...is not that it occurred, but that it was allowed. Branka...my love…”

“Where is Branka!?” Eyes flashed dangerously at the woman above on the ledge, looking down on them, the crimson hardened with an anger he hadn’t felt in a long time. It seethed through his flesh, his bones and it felt like fire touched every tip. Fear had morphed into rage, into a need to stop all of this by the end of his arrows, by his own hand.

“The Stone has punished me, dream-friend. I am dying of something worse than death. Betrayal.” With that final word she disappeared into the darkness like she was never there, leaving them with all the answers but no reasoning at all. It rumbled through his chest, a growl turned into a scream that sounded almost beastial himself. His head swarmed red, grabbing one of the fallen darkspawn swords and driving it into the now dead flesh of the Broodmother. Over and over again, each stab and slash gutting it out but no matter what he was no more satisfied than the first time. Frustration, sorrow, fear, rage...it choked him out, made him feel mindless and he would have kept on stabbing if he was not lifted from behind, arms locked over his head with strength he had no way of breaking. 

“Calm yourself, acting like a wild beast will not bring them back nor bring you peace”, Sten’s voice registered and he struggled wildly, screaming with open sorrow as he was forced to look upon this poor creature once more. Tears stung his eyes...how much fear filled the bodies of those who were turned, how much pain and suffering did they feel as they were violated and changed. The taint changes and consumes many but for those who could give birth, this is what they are subjected to?! Death was a salvation these people could only hope for. Tamlen’s face flashed before his eyes and tears flowed from his cheeks, falling to the red below.

“If this is what happens to the tainted...then the Gods have really left us”, voice hoarse from yelling, choked up with tears but his words were loud and clear to the group, “What do we even do…”

“We stop it”, red-rimmed eyes turn towards the other Warden and while Alistair himself had visibly paled from the experience, his face had hardened with resolve, “We kill the Archdemon and we end this. So nobody has suffered in vain.” His body sags in Sten’s grip, finally lowered to the ground as he stares up at his friend in such awe. Emotions had dragged him under like a tempest but it was like the human’s words had calmed it down, making him realise that they could do something to help. 

“Alistair’s right and we will help you both”, Wynn spoke up this time, stern in her face but her words were warm to him. 

“To bring an end to this will bring an end to future injustice”, his eyes flicked to Sten and slowly he looked at everyone. They had all been affected by this one way or another but their anger had solidified to strength, not a wave of rage like him. Maybe they had wanted to lash out too, maybe seeing him lose it had brought them clarity, who knows. All he knows is those words calmed a part of him that had been suffocating for a while now. That he could make sure Tamlen didn’t die in vain, with his own hands he could see that end.

“You’re right”, the laugh from his lips is almost forced as he runs his arm over his eyes, rubbing out the last of the tears, “I feel kind of dumb not realising that.” A hand gently pats his back and he looks up at Leliana smiling at him, bringing him in for a small hug that they both seemed to need.

“You feel strongly, that is okay. We also feel the same but we will all fight to make this better, with you both.”, he hugs her tighter for a moment, basking in the small comfort he hadn’t felt in a while. They eventually break apart and he runs a hand through his hair as he surveys the mess. Logically they should rest for a moment but everyone seems high on the adrenaline, ready to face the next thing through bumps and bruises. It was kind of heartwarming to see and he stands up taller, scanning the place until his eyes land on another entrance on the other side of the cavern. Right, that’s where they had to go.

“First things first, we need to see this Branka and get some damn answers.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This really whiplashes from light and fun to dark and emotional and I honestly had fun writing that. It's always kind of fun to try to write something horrifying and gripping because I think it's quite a challenge, to see if you can get the audience to react as the character does. And Hue is emotional, no doubt. If I had to write the Deep Roads I was gonna go all in, sorry for the tease at the start but they're getting there.
> 
> Oghren and Sibylle just straight up not getting along was not planned but seemed to fit well.


	19. Finally

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "There is nothing innocent about the way I want you; you fill me with wild, wanton, and insatiable desire" - j.s
> 
> I separated the sex scene with ==== just in case people want to skip it!

“Let me be blunt with you. After all this time, my tolerance for social graces is fairly limited. That doesn’t bother you, I hope.”

“Shave my back and call me an elf! Branka? By the stone, I barely recognized you!” Oghren let out a bark of a laugh, amazed to see the woman he had been searching for all this time. Hue, however, was not happy to see her. After learning what had happened...what she did, he wanted answers and he was going to get them one way or another. The dwarven woman regarded both of them with cold, dark eyes, bags sitting heavy underneath them. Chestnut hair pulled back from her face and decked out in heavy armor, she seemed far too calm for this whole situation.

“Oghren. It figures you’d eventually find your way here. Hopefully, you can find your way back more easily. And how shall I address you? Hired sword of the latest lordling to come looking for me? Or just the only one who didn’t mind Oghren’s ale-breath?” His fist clenched hard at his side, eyes narrowing, how did the stone around have more feeling than this woman?

“Be respectful, woman! You’re talking to a Gray Warden!”

“Ah, so an important errand boy, then. I suppose something serious has happened. Is Endrin dead? That seems most likely. He was on the old and wheezy side.”

“How do you know I’m not just helping Oghren?”, the dwarven man looked up curiously at the elf, noticing the hard scowl starting to form in his young face. The harsh laugh echoed on the stones, Branka looking at them both like they’re a joke.

“Because nobody helps Oghren. At best, Oghren’s need to find me happened to coincide with the needs of someone more important.”

“What a bitch…”, he heard Sibylle whisper from the back but he couldn’t exactly admonish her, he was thinking the exact same thing. 

“You are impossible!” Oghren growled out, throwing his hands up in frustration, “This Gray Warden’s come all the way from the surface to ask your help picking Endrin’s successor!” 

“I don’t care if the Assembly puts a drunken monkey on the throne.”

“Just like you didn’t care about your people”, Hue finally walked closer, the heat from the earlier fight rising up once more in his veins. Honestly he didn’t care what kind of excuse she was going to give. No excuse would ever justify what she had let happen to those people. Sadly it seemed all she had was excuses as she moved further into the cavern, justification clear on her tongue but it churned out like mud, thick and dirty and unwanted. Giving chase he was followed closely by his group, screaming at her to stop but she wouldn’t heed any of them. Darkspawn did though, filing out of the tunnels but his arrows found their marks easily. Rage still steeped his blood but instead of wildfire consuming every fiber, he was heavy in icy, seething anger. 

Fighting through the ancient traps, they managed to make their way into a massive cavern dyed in orange light from the lava waterfalls pouring into the lake below. Heat clung to their skin, their armor as they cautiously moved in, weapons ready for the next wave to rush out. Rock formations of lyrium scattered along the stone floor, like crystalline weeds sprouting through any cracks it could find. Soft blue light was drowned out by the orange, the stone going up at a slight incline until Hue spotted in the distance...at the tip of a narrow cliff, a large anvil. Did they actually manage to find this cursed thing? The second, and most apparent, surprise in this cavern was the army of golems frozen in place. Scattered around like part of some underground decor but none made a move or sound, except for the largest one in the middle. The one made of metal and steel, fashioned in a brillant armor set the likes he had never seen.

“I bid you welcome stranger. My name is Caridin. Once, longer ago than I care to think, I was a Paragon to the dwarves of Orzammar”, the deep voice reverberated through the metal, spilling from the open grates of the helmet. The likes which sat comically small between a large, upturned collar and massive shoulder plates. Well, it would be funny if Hue had felt like laughing but the main point of their chase still eluded them and what stood between them and a bargaining chip was a large, metal man. Golem? 

“Caridin? The Paragon smith? Alive?”, Shale spoke up, voice laced with confusion and awe.

“Wait, there’s another Paragon? What even is that?” He probably should have listened to that explanation before running off to the deep roads but all he remembered was that it was some important title or something.

“Did those fools tell you a sodding thing?”, Oghren grunted, “Paragons are living ancestors. They’re praised and have statues made of them because they achieved greatness or made something to advance society. You really ran down here not knowing what we were looking for?”

“I heard “important” and “make the decision other than you”, that’s all I needed to hear”, Hue shrugs, he should feel more embarrassed about it but that would require him to care after all they’ve been through. Considering he was about two words away from putting an arrow through Branka’s head he just chalked up Paragon to mean giant asshole at this point.

“Ah, there is a voice I recognise. Shayle of the House of Cadash, step forward.” Oh, this conversation was still going.

“You...know my name? Is it you that forged me, then? Is it you that gave me my name?”

“ Have you forgotten, then?”, the sigh sounded like steam rattling pipes, “ It has been so long. I made you into the golem you are now, Shayle, but before that you were a dwarf...just as I was. The finest warrior to serve King Valtor, and the only woman to volunteer.” 

“The only...woman? A dwarf?”

“I laid you on the Anvil of the Void, here in this very room, and put you into the form you now possess. If you seek the Anvil, then you must care about my story, or be doomed to relive it.” Hue crossed his arm, nodding to the metal golem to continue , “ Though I made many things in my time, I rose to fame and earned my status based on a single item: the Anvil of the Void. It allowed me to forge a man of steel or stone, as flexible and clever as any soldier. As an army, they were invincible. But I told no one the cost.”

“What do you mean?” Quirking an eyebrow, he lowered his arms, not sure if he was going to like this.

“ No mere smith, however skilled, has the power to create life. To make my golems live, I had to take their lives from elsewhere. I had only intended to use volunteers, but he was not satisfied...and soon a river of blood flowed out of this place. Finally, it was too much. I refused. And so Valtor had me put on the Anvil, next.” Rubbing the bridge of his nose, Hue realised now there was no way anyone could have this Anvil now, “You were amongst the most loyal, Shayle. You remained at my side throughout, and at the end I sent you away out of mercy.”

“I...do not remember”, Shayle sounded in pain, shaking their head as stones rubbed together.

“We have remained entombed here ever since, and I have sought a way to destroy the Anvil. Alas, I cannot do it myself. No golem can touch it.” Before Hue could speak up, offering his services in destroying yet another artifact...which he has to admit he’s getting good at now, a scream sounded from the cavern entrance.

“No! The Anvil is mine! No one will take it from me!” 

“Branka, you mad, bleeding nug-tail! Does this thing mean so much to you that you can’t even see what you’ve lost to get it?” Taking his place at Oghren’s side, Hue readies his bow. Finally his prey has shown herself and with her rage and a control rod, the once solid golems began to awaken, shaking through the stiffness and descending upon them.

Footsteps pounded against the polished stone, either by a clack or thud and it echoed through the halls as the group made their way to the Assembly doors. Waiting for no introduction, Hue threw them open, interrupting the meeting to stand before all the dwarven nobles and the two men who started all this mess. Blood and dirt caked his armor, he was sure bruises had already coloured along his skin but he felt no pain, just a deep-seated anger to all this madness. With Oghren’s witness Hue was able to present the crown Caridin made to bestow on a new king, leaving the choice up to Hue. The damn choice that Hue didn’t want to make in the first place but now was back in his hands.

Damn Branka, damn her for eternity. Even in the end she only cared about the Anvil, her greed painting over every misdeed and atrocity she had committed. It was that madness that led to her death, put down by Hue and Oghren combined. He couldn’t imagine the turmoil storming inside of the dwarf, having to put down the wife you’ve been searching for for years. In exchange for destroying the Anvil, Caridin had agreed to make a crown for the future king, bestowing the Paragon’s blessing to Hue’s wisdom. Wisdom he didn’t have but they had already made their choice and a thin thread of politeness was keeping him from throwing the damn thing right into Bhelen’s face. Even after Bhelen was crowned and Hue had to argue with him about putting Harrowmont to death, the weight was just too heavy to carry.

Too much despair was soaked in their bones and with heavy steps, they made their way back to the inn to wash up, drink, sleep, or do whatever they needed to do to forget for a while. 

The tension had grown with her during their week stay, though that could be said with most of them. The truths they found out during the Deep Roads weighed heavily on his heart but Sibylle had been on edge. Not that she outright showed it but she hadn’t teased him or, well, anything really...the warmth was gone and her edges were sharper than his sword. While others had drank and spoke to each other, either by glossing over the facts or communicating their feelings, she had closed herself off. Oghren had as well but the man not only lost his wife to madness but had literally had to kill her, that seemed...a rather good excuse to be on a drinking binge.

Poised to knock on her door, Alistair hesitated, wondering if he should even be the one to do this before he heard voices through the stone. Eavesdropping was not something he normally indulged in but the words that floated to his ear had him frozen in place.

“It’s hard not to notice the doe-eyed looks he gives you, especially when he thinks no one’s watching”, Wynn’s voice was clear in the silent hall and the words caught up in his head, making him blush, “It’s almost too sweet for my tastes.” 

“And you came to tell me to stop…”

“Must you say it so harshly”, he leans in more, this conversation should really be private but he had to know, “Alistair is a fine lad but quite inexperienced when it comes to affairs of the heart. I would hate to see him get hurt.”

“What, are you his mother now?”, Sibylle scoffed, coldness tinting her voice, “He’s not a child, Wynn. Is that not his choice to make?”

“Sometimes people make bad decisions when they are in love.”

“Because a bitch like me is bound to hurt him…”, he winces at her raw tone, he’s never heard her like that before, “You fear I will taint him like everything else I touch.”

“This has nothing to do with you. He has a duty as a--”

“It most certainly has something to do with me!”, words cut through stone almost like she was right in front of him, making him back up a little, “Do not try to play coy with me, I can see now what you think of me. You think I am a flashy thing he’s made a bad decision of, that I am leading him off to some unspoken doom like a desire demon. What I find the most insulting is you think I am some irresponsible trollop going to ruin him and destroy his will to fight the Blight. Insulting to me but mostly insulting to him.” He blinked, had to think on what was being said. In the back of his mind he knew Wynn was just being...motherly but what Sibylle said had made his heart beat faster. Pounding right against his chest. Despite being spoken to like that the blonde mage still defended him, it wasn’t something he thought anyone would do so casually.

“Love is selfish, Sibylle, it demands that one be devoted to a single person who may fully occupy one’s mind and heart to the exclusion of all else”, Wynn’s voice was soft in comparison to the other, as if speaking to an agitated child, “A Gray Warden cannot afford to be selfish and as a circle mage, you know what happens when we become selfish.” There’s a heavy sigh, silence stilling the air before he hears a voice once more.

“ I am probably just a distraction for him, you’ve thought too seriously on this…”

“Even I know you don’t believe that”, another beat of silence, “What choice do you think he would make if he had to save you or everyone else?”

“Hah, hypotheticals now?”, the laugh sounded wrong, forced, “...I wouldn’t make him have to make that choice.” Shock coloured Alistair's face before melting in confusion, he wasn’t sure what to make of that until Wynn’s next words struck a chord in him.

“...You are fond of him…”, the surprise in Wynn’s voice was nothing compared to the surprise that made its home in his face. Cheeks starting to redden, heart spreading up as a hand comes to cover his mouth, as if anyone could see him in this ghosted hallway. With the pounding in his ears he almost didn’t hear the footsteps moving to the door, quietly sneaking back around the corner to pretend he was never there. The stone was cool against his back, seeping in through his shirt as thoughts screamed through his head. Could she actually...did he actually have a chance? Waiting until he was sure that Wynn was out of sight at the other end of the hall he gave himself a few minutes to compose himself before finally knocking on Sibylle’s door himself.

“I thought I told you..oh”, the annoyance in those blue eyes melted when she saw it wasn’t the older mage but Alistair standing there, “Alistair...you’re here a bit late. Shouldn’t you be at dinner?”

“Shouldn’t you?”

“Ah, come to check up on me, have you?”, Despite the sigh on her lips she let him into her room, shutting the door behind, “Was there something you needed?”

“Not needed but...well”, he had practiced what he was going to say quite a bit before he had walked over but now with this new, almost forbidden, knowledge all of that had quickly left his head, “ I know what we saw down there still has everyone on edge and I was...well, I was worried. About you. You didn’t seem to take it very well.”

“I don’t know a person who’d take that realization well, Alistair”, her arms had crossed, nails digging a bit into the fabric as she stared off into nothing, “I wonder how many of those creatures had originally been female Gray Wardens sent to their doom…” Brown eyes widened, he hadn’t even thought of that and now... _oh Maker_ , Gray Wardens were supposed to make one last stand before death but what if some of them weren’t even granted death or honour. What if they…

“Oh Maker…” His hands moved up to hide his face, hunched over in a chair as the thoughts screamed loudly in his head but pale fingers wrapped around his, pulling his vision forward. She had knelt down in front of him, all the cold melted from her body.

“I’m sorry Alistair, I didn’t mean...I wasn’t blaming you”, they took a moment to look into each other’s eyes before Sibylle stood up again, slowly removing her hands, “ it’s frightening. To think what goes through those poor souls’ minds as they are changed and violated. To realise we weren’t just fighting nameless monsters all along but someone’s loved one...sibling, sister, brother, friend.” Arms shook as she hugged herself, nail digging in once again as she looked to the floor. Right now she looked so vulnerable, scared...something in him compelled him to stand up and approach her.

“Sibylle…”, blue met brown as she looked at him, not realising how close he really was, “I’m sorry if you don’t like what I’m about to do and you can push me away. I don’t know what else to do for you though.” Question disappeared from her tongue as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her right against his body. Normally he’d be a mess in this position but she needed this...he needed this. Tense shoulders eased down as she relaxed more and soon he felt her arms go around him as well, grabbing on to the back of his shirt for dear life. Face buried in his neck and he could smell the sweet fragrance of her hair tickling his nose, rough hand gently smoothing up and down her back.

“Thank you…”, if he hadn’t been listening intently he would have missed the soft whisper into his skin, making the corner of his lips turn up slightly. His voice slipped out in a whisper as well, afraid to break the fragile world they had found themselves in.

“Anytime.”

Zevran wasn’t pouting. An assassin who pouts? Doesn’t exist and certainly not what he was doing sitting on Hue’s bed, waiting for the elf to return as the large Mabari breathed in his general direction. Not that he hated the large, slobbering beast, in fact he could be rather fond of the dog sometimes but Ruffles was definitely not who he wanted to be alone in the bedroom with. Yet here he was.

“I swear if Alistair is holding up our dear Warden again…”, rubbing the back of his neck he tried to think on why he was so antsy and could only come up with one reason, “ It is time I make your master take responsibility for luring me so.” Ruffles only cocked her head, a short whine to announce she was listening. 

“Why am I talking to a dog, you cannot understand me…”, a longer whine was his answer as she put back her ears, nudging his hand with her big nose. With a sigh he scratched behind her ears, hearing the footsteps before the door opened up with the elf in question coming inside.

“Nice to see you two get along”, a chuckle spilled from Hue’s lips, the shorter man closing the door as he put his boots on a chair nearby. Zevran watched as the Dalish cracked his neck, rotating his shoulders with a soft groan...seemed the heavy weight from earlier in the week had finally started to lift some. Approaching Hue right after their adventure in the deep road gave very few answers, the younger man preferring to be alone as he sorted through his mental mess. Today he definitely looked better but tiredness still coloured his eyes, giving Zevran an idea as he sauntered over with a click of his tongue.

“Look at you. Your weary stance, the dark circles under your eyes. Poor man, all this constant walking has gotten to you. Do you know what you need?”, Hue blinked as Zevran circled around behind him, looking over his shoulder to the bag the other was holding. Seemed their Warden had gone out for supplies...so that’s where he had been all this time. Crimson eyes regarded him before snorting out a laugh, going back to digging through the contents of his bag.

“Oh? This I have to hear…” Amusement laced his tone and Zevran pulled back, opening the door to usher out the Mabari as he kept speaking.

“My thought is this: We retire to your bed and I show you the sort of massage skills that one only learns growing up in an Antivan whorehouse.” The door clicked shut, leaving them both in silence as Hue slowly turned to look at the other. Red started to dust his cheeks as surprise first appeared on his face, then realization.

“Are...are you suggesting what I think you’re suggesting?” Walking over he gently took the bag from the Warden, plopping it down in the chair as his eyes never left the other. Smirk morphed into something more serious as he leaned in, making sure he had the other’s full attention.

“If you mean to ask whether or not there might be more than a massage involved, allow me simply to say that you won’t be disappointed with any of the techniques I’ve picked up over the years.” Purposely he kept his voice low, watching the way the blush spread to Hue's ears. With each step forward the Warden took one back, until knees hit the edge of the bed and Hue found himself sitting. The look of interest in the younger man’s eyes fueled his need to push but he just leaned in, hands on either side of the other.

“Zevran...are you sure?” A soft chuckle erupted from the Antivan.

“What is there to fear, my Gray Warden? You deserve a little fun, do you not? If you’re not of a mind, however, it is no tragedy.” Slowly he began to back up but Hue grabbed his arm, adorable worry on his brow that Zevran might actually leave.

“I am! Of a mind..I’m definitely of a mind…”

========================================================================================

“Then why are we still talking?” He’s not sure who started it, both lips seemingly coming together at the same time. Their first kiss...and he reveled in it, the way Hue’s lips weren’t that soft but eager as his body leaned in more. With a hand tracing the green, curving tattoo along his cheek, Zevran directed Hue’s head to the side, allowing for the kiss to deepen. Lips parted to breathe and he took his chance, tongue sliding along the other’s. It wasn’t the most experienced but Hue seemed to follow his subtle direction and was eager to please, which was always a plus. As the kissing became a bit more intense he pushed against the Warden’s chest, making him slide back further on the bed and he followed. 

Hue’s small pants were a bit adorable, they had only been kissing so far but the sound he liked the most was when he pulled gently on the back of that messy, dandelion hair, earning him a pleased moan. Ah, so maybe he didn’t have to be all that gentle with this one. He felt calloused hands slide along the skin just under his shirt, the thumb, rough with each string pull, rubbing circles. Kissing was all well and grand but he had promised the Warden so much more and he planned on delivering. 

With some rather fast maneuvers, because he absolutely did not memorize how Hue’s armour worked for when they got to this point, he tossed the chest piece to the side. Shirt removed just as quickly until the shorter elf laid shirtless on the bed between his thighs, marveling at the way lean muscles moved underneath tannish skin. Underneath the shadows and moon, Hue’s skin had glowed and each dip was easily contrasted. Now he could see every dip and curve, small scars from battles and hunts that littered along his skin. This time, however, he was able to slide his hands along, slowly trailing up his abs to his shoulders and back down again with some reverence. Crimson eyes watched him curiously, cheeks pink with interest until it spread when Zevran’s fingers toyed with the hem of his pants.

“May I?”, Hue probably didn’t mean to nod as eagerly as he did but Zevran chuckled. It was rather adorable and he wondered how eager the man would be further in. Slowly he worked the other’s trousers off, working on the smallclothes next until his prize was fully naked underneath him. Despite trying to stay composed himself, his hands eagerly slid along toned thighs, feeling the muscles contract under his palms. Powerful was the first word to come to his mind and he couldn’t wait to feel them around him. Ah, but first things first. There was some slight hesitation when he moved to part those thighs but Hue gave in, spreading out for him to rub along the insides as well.

“H-hey…”, amber eyes looked up from his task, “It’s not really fair if I’m the only one naked.”

“Ah, you are right. Forgive me, my dear Warden”, his ministrations stopped, lifting up so that he could pull his shirt over his head.

“Hue…”, the blush had spread to the bottom of the other’s ears, making Zevran blink at the abnormally soft voice, “ Uh...please, call me by my name when we’re doing this.” Ah. Such a simple, innocent request but the nervous look in the Warden’s eyes made him chuckle, leaning in to kiss away his worry.

“Of course...Hue”, a soft, shy smile was his reward and Zevran kissed it away, not wanting to think on how adorable that was. Instead he focused his efforts on trailing his lips down the other’s chin and into his neck. On instinct the other elf turned his head, giving him more room to work with and so he did, making a few dark marks to try to explain away. It was when he grazed his teeth that he was given another deep moan, feeling fingers work their way into his hair. Forging his own wet trail with his lips, he made his way further down the other’s body one kiss at a time until the dip of muscles led to a very interested piece. Tongue swiped down shivering pelvis, making Hue’s hips lift from the bed but he pushes them back down, holding him in place.

“ _Zevran_ …”, it was a delicious sounding whine, Hue absolutely had the ability to throw him off if need be but he let Zevran hold him down, the relinquishing of power was heady. 

“Patience Hue...you can’t rush these things”, smirking over at crimson eyes that swirled in unfiltered heat, he kissed along a lifted thigh, leaving his marks along it’s inner sanctum. At first Hue had at least tried to keep his noises to a minimum but the more Zevran worked on him, the less he seemed to hide it. Which worked for the Antivan, nothing felt better than knowing you were doing a great job. Speaking of that...pulling the bottle of finally being used oil from his trousers, he expertly opened the top, spreading some on two fingers before closing it up again and putting it to the side. 

“Um…” The question was left unasked as coated fingers ran along Hue’s hole, rubbing against the rim and making him gasp.

“Have you ever done anything here?”, a shake of the head was Zevran’s answer and he gently kept rubbing, paying closer attention to the other’s expressions, “If it hurts too much or you do not like it, you must let me know, okay?” A nod, hands flying up to the other’s face to hide but Zevran knew that wouldn’t last long...not when he was done with the elf. There was the case of Hue not relaxing, something that could be easily remedied as he settled himself more between those powerful thighs. While a finger prodded in as much as it could, slowly sinking into tight, hot muscle, his tongue went to work on something else hot. At first Zevran just trailed his tongue along the underside of the cock in front of him, sucking up the vein and teasing the sensitive nerves at the crown. When lips enveloped the head, however, he could feel legs spread more, his finger sinking to the base as Hue moaned out once more. 

It took some pressing to make the Warden keep his hips down, muscles tight under his hand as he went to work. Between the loose strands of blonde hair amber eyes flicked up to the other’s face. One hand was still covering most of it, though haphazardly at best, but he could see cheeks were now red. Lips slacked open, moans and whines spilled from hot breath and the other hand gripped the pillow underneath his head tightly, as if he were dangling from a cliff. Skin flushed with heat, he could feel muscles shivering underneath him and not just on the outside. Working his finger slowly in and out the ring of muscles were pulling him in now instead of pushing out, quivering under his touch. As he moved to slip another finger in, he took more into his mouth, tongue sliding along the otherside as he bobbed his head. 

This time he couldn’t keep Hue’s hips from moving, not that he really wanted to. After the initial stretch the Warden seemed more than eager to help, moving his hips in time with each thrust. The hand that had been his mask now found its home in Zevran’s hair, not quite holding him there but giving the Warden something to hold on to. A tangy taste hit his tongue, flushed head of the Warden’s cock weeping in his mouth and he knew if he penetrated him now, Hue wouldn’t last a second. Better to get him off once and move this show along. 

“Zevran...Zevran, hah, I need...I’m”, words barely formed between the moaning as he slipped the cock from his mouth with a pop, replacing it with his hand. Licking his slightly swollen lips he got a front seat to a rather beautiful sight indeed. Pushing his fingers in as deep as he could, he rubbed easily along throbbing walls and with an expert grip, the Warden came on his tanned hand, dripping onto his own toned stomach. The moan, almost scream, that forced itself from his throat had his head thrown back, usual messy hair all over the place as fingers gripped and pulled the bedding underneath. Hips rolled, Zevran’s hand pumping him through the orgasm as his body seemed to loosen every taut muscle in one go. Eyes watery as he opened them up, almost slits and watching Zevran as fingers vacated Hue.

“There now, just what you needed. You already have such a glow about you, my dear. Why, I haven’t seen you this relaxed in a WHI”, words were forced from his lips as thighs wrapped harshly around his waist, making him bend over the Warden. Gone was the shy yet eager look of an innocent man but was now replaced with something much more feral, wild. _Hot_ , Zevran’s mind provided as he was forced to look into those eyes before he felt his back arch, Hue squeezing him down enough to grind against him.

“You can’t leave until you come too...it’s only fair”, while the tone was still laced with some nervousness, the insatiable hunger alone in that expression made Zevran snap, “so less talking, more action.” Well okay then, no need for foreplay anymore. He had already been straining his own trousers through this and who was he to deny such a demand.

“Well, how could I say no to that?”, tongues found each other one again, tilting the tattoo’d chin down to gain more access. His other hand reached down, lightly patting Hue’s thigh to loosen so he could free himself. Pulling down the rest of his clothes enough, he lined up his own cock with the other’s, stroking them both slowly in time. His kissing never stopped, swallowing each breath Hue tried to take as fire consumed them both. Usually he liked to do his love making with a bit more finesse, show off his skills but Hue’s wild nature was contagious. It was like no matter how much they touched of the other it wasn’t enough, the endless times they had teased the other finally crashing down into one moment. Calloused hand joined his to stroke and the other ran over his chest, feeling along the muscles he had and down his back. He thinks Hue is saying words in the pauses between kissing but he can’t tell between the loud beating of their hearts. Desire is pumping his blood, pounding his head until it is all he can breathe in. Hue was a fountain he had been dying to drink from and now that he had a taste, he could never stop.

Eventually he pulls back, lining the head of his cock with Hue’s slick hole, pressing just enough for the head to pop through. The reaction was immediate, considering it was larger than two fingers and Hue turned his head, biting his lower lip. It was going to be tight, there was no denying it but before he could remind Hue of communicating the younger man beat him to it.

“Hah, I’ll say it...if I need to, just goooo, please…”, the gravel in his voice moved into a whine, begging the Antivan to just get on with it. 

“My dear Hue is so impatient”, cheeks darkened as Hue kept his head turned, “just breathe out and relax. I do not wish to harm you, unless that is something you want but we might save that for another day.” That, at least, got a chuckle out of the other and slowly, with more measured kisses to help, he is able to sink in to the base. Bending over the other, his forehead rests on Hue’s chest as they both breathe harder. It was tight, he wasn’t wrong, but didn’t seem to be overtly painful to the other. Still, he waited until Hue started to get antsy, hips jerking to signal that he was ready to go. Which was fantastic because Zevran had been ready, gently grinding his hips to gauge the reaction. Moaning, good, that was a good reaction. Now to pull out until just the head breached and back in he went.

“ _Creators!_ ”, rough fingers gripped on his back, pulling the Antivan flushed to his Warden and that blushing face hid in his tan neck, making him chuckle. Oh he couldn’t wait to hear that voice scream, repeating the process but with a harder thrust this time. Over and over, he found a rhythm and the wonders he could do if he was able to lift up, holding those beautiful thighs open but Hue had him trapped against him, not that he’s complaining. Heat formed from friction, movement, and the thrusting hit harder, making sure to keep a rhythm. The oil did it’s job, keeping him slick as Zevran sunk as deep as he could each time. Wet sounds of skin hitting skin were drowned out by the moaning. Maker, could his Warden moan, as if Hue wanted to make sure everyone knew just how good he felt.

Not that Zevran was being quiet himself, it felt too good and if the leaking cock caught between their stomachs was any indication, they were both very close. Speeding up his hips he buried his face into Hue’s shoulder, letting the shorter man hug him tight as walls tightened and throbbed around his cock. Hot breath, hot body, hot, hot, he felt like he was melting into the other, hips stuttering as his mind focused solely on each thrust. Closer, harder, until he can feel the other clench around him, thighs suddenly around his waist as Hue’s body arches off the bed with a scream. It took everything in his power not to come then and there inside, walls of muscle gripping him hard, making it hard for him to rock his hips. Eventually he was able to slip out, spilling his own seed in the same mess Hue made on his stomach. There was a point where they looked at each other, eyes hooded in lust, lips ajar as the air escaped them.

======================================================================================

“Wow…”, Zevran blinked, realising Hue had sat up quickly and then lips were on his. It wasn’t erratic or needy but felt like a need, a kiss to start and a kiss to end. Slowly he was led back down onto the bed, both elves laying on their sides looking at the other.

“So, have my dear Hue’s demands been met”, there was a moment where Hue tried to hide his face again but just grinned at the Antivan, crimson eyes alight with happiness.

“I don’t know, we may have to try again later…”

“Mmm, now that is a tempting offer I cannot wait for.”, Hue’s playful grin was matched with his own, pulling the dalish man into his arms, “but for now, we clean up and rest. I’m sure you will sleep very well.”

“As long as you’re with me”, there’s a moment where Zevran’s mind blanks, thinking on how bad of an idea that might be. Sex was sex but cuddling was...well. He didn’t have the heart to deny that hopeful look in his Warden’s eyes and just chuckled. Oh, whatever, it will probably be fine. After cleaning up he settled under the covers with the other, lights out and he could feel Hue hug against his body, head under Zevran’s chin. Despite all the warning signs blaring through his skin he gently ran a hand up and down Hue’s spine, feeling the other elf melt into sleep. It wasn’t long before he was joining him, ignoring small fears to bask in the comfort of Hue’s warmth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here it is, the boys finally get to it. I wasn't sure whether it was going to be this chapter or the next but the segue was good enough. Not much to say, Alistair being sweet and Zevran and Hue being rambunctious (and loud).


	20. Green and Red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I’d be picking roses for a lifetime.”
> 
> – Swedish Proverb

Warmth had seeped into every part of his body, weighing him down with a contentment he hadn’t felt in a long time. Dreams had been quiet for once; no nightmares of crawling darkspawn or spewing archdemons or the corpses of friends laid horrifically across shattered floors. It was simply peace, something he had almost forgotten since he had left his clan. Eyes refused to open, burying his face closer to the source of this wonderful heat. Sheets slide smoothly along his tanned skin, an almost foreign feeling as they cocooned his naked form. Ah, right, he was naked.

Cracking his eyes open slowly it took a moment for his vision to return from dreamland; blurry shapes forming and sharpening until he could see the other elf across from him. Their bodies are close enough he can feel the soft, warm breath near his face, the other’s chest rising and falling gently. Zevran had stayed...sleeping soundly next to him but he had actually stayed. Hue’s not sure why but that thought made his chest grow warmer, slowly reaching out to trace fingers gently along the assassin’s face. First gently across the black tattoos that curved from a blonde eyebrow down along a sculpted cheekbone. The skin was smooth against the roughness of his fingers, the tan of the Antivan darker than his. Wheat-coloured hair fell in some strands along his face and neck, which was more slender than Hue had realised before. Eyelashes were long, fanned out. _Pretty_ , thought Hue and lips that had stolen his breath earlier were slightly parted, letting him trace his thumb over the bottom. 

“Captivated, are you?” , Hue startled, that almost sultry voice was laced with remnants of sleep, contrasting open amber eyes filled with amusement.

“Uh...how long have you been awake?”

“The whole time”, Zevran chuckled as Hue tried to sink into the covers, hiding his now reddened face, “ See? I knew this would happen eventually. I should have warned you right from the moment you refused to kill me. It was inevitable.”

“Here I thought I seduced you”, a muffled voice grumbled out sarcastically from the cover lump, making Zevran laugh and rub a hand over it.

“O-ho! Such subtlety in your seductive charms that I was not even aware of them. A work of art in motion, perhaps?”

“Oh shut up…”, Hue couldn’t see the smile upon the Antivan’s face, he could, however, feel that hand patting where his hip was.

“So, then. As the priestess so famously said to the handsome actor: What now?”, That made Hue emerge, head peeking out as he gave Zevran a thoughtful look.

“I was going to ask you the same thing…”

“Allow me to make it simple for you, my Gray Warden”, the assassin sits up, sheets pooling into his lap as Hue is mesmerized by him in the lantern light, “ What comes next is entirely up to you. I was raised to take my pleasures where they could be found, for they do not come very often. I shall ask nothing more of you than you are willing to give.” Seriousness set into Zevran’s face like stone. He had meant every word he said, Hue could tell, but something tugged him up, his eyes meeting the other’s dead on.

“What about love?” It had slipped out before he could think. To be honest he hadn’t thought it could be anything like that, surely it was just attraction. Saying the question out loud had made his heart skip and it dawned on him, maybe his want of Zevran had really been more of a need. Love was an incredibly strong word, one that he definitely wasn’t ready to use but he knew he liked the other, wanted to be around him, kiss him. Wasn’t that what a crush really was? Zevran, however, seemed to be of a different mind.

“I was born of a whore and bred as an assassin”, words spilled out with an edge, Zevran’s hands moving with his points, “ All I know is of pleasure and death. What room is there in these things for love, huh?” Hue thought for a moment, red eyes scanning the sheets when he realised...Zevran’s never had the luxury of a loving hand or a safe place. There was no mother figure to tend to his wounds or shield him from nightmares, no clan to watch his back and laugh with. Everything Hue grew up as his normal were but strange fantasies to the Antivan, heard about in stories but never experienced himself. It made the Warden’s heart ache. So he’s right, what room would love had had in his life filled with caution, distrust, and death knocking on every door. That could be changed though, in the future...no, right now, Hue had the ability to change that for him.

“I think I get what you’re saying.”

“At any rate we should be on our way”, Zevran started to move but Hue acted faster, wrapping his arms around the more slender waist and pulling him right onto his back, “...Hue.” The tone sounded close to a scolding but it only caused a smile to grow on Hue’s face, holding tight and moving his face into the crook of the other’s neck.

“Not yet…”, there was a brief moment where he thought Zevran might refuse but all he heard above him was a sigh before gentle fingers ran through his hair.

“Alright”, a soft chuckle vibrated in the chest under his cheek, “ but do not blame me if things progress again. I do have a rather handsome man in nothing at all clinging to me.”

“Maybe that’s the plan”, lifting his head he cups Zevran’s face in his hands, both pairs of eyes staring into the other before lips meet. The kiss was soft, there was no need to rush, no sense of time as they took the other in. He swore in his heart that he would never get tired of kissing Zevran...ever.

“So...what would you do if someone told you that they loved you?” Wynn blinked, looking up at him as they walked side by side. It had been a couple days since they left Orzammar, following Hue on the trail of the Dalish clan he knew lived in the Brecilian forest. The road they marched along was well traveled, rows of green and brown filling their vision on either side. It had been a nice day, thankfully, and he had brought up the rear with the older mage. Hopefully enough to be away from prying ears.

“Check their eyesight first, perhaps.” Wynn chuckled softly, “Is this someone I should know about?”

“No! I mean, pretend you’re a woman...”

“I _am_ a woman, Alistair. That shouldn’t be too hard, but I’ll give it a try.” Alistair’s face reddens quickly, running a hand down his face with a groan. _Did he really just say that?!_ He missed the way Wynn was smirking at him.

“Ahh, that’s...not what I meant. Just...pretend you’re another woman. And someone told you that they loved you. How would you react?” Well, he was already in this deep and Wynn’s been good on giving him advice already. Maybe they could just pretend he hadn’t completely shoved his own foot in his mouth and solve his current dilemma. Which is something that has consumed his mind since his talk with the blonde mage in Orzammar.

“Well, that depends. Does this someone just blurt it out? Do I love them back? I need context.” Oh maker, why was she making this harder? How was he supposed to know this?

“I...I don’t know if you love him back. Maybe you do. You’ve...spent a lot of time with this person.”

“Perhaps you need to wait for the right moment? You could get her alone in camp, give her a gift perhaps.”

“Oh, I wasn’t talking about me...just…”, Wynn’s face told him that she absolutely already knew he was talking about himself and wow, he really wanted to stop talking now, “ forget I said anything.” Her soft chuckle spilled out next to him and he rubbed the back of his neck, was it that hot today?

“As you wish.”

Camp was set later on during their walk, once the sky was dyed with an orange hue across it’s cloudless blue scape. The more senior members of the party set right to work, leaving Oghren to well...drink but Alistair was more surprised at how well behaved he was. Also how well he fought being drunk, how did the dwarf even know the end of his hammer from the pommel as the world spun? Truly one of the many mysteries of Thedas. Setting up one of the tents his gaze instantly goes around camp, spotting the blonde mage near Morrigan. It looked like the two were going through some herbs together and talking. His arm leaned against one of the poles, warm eyes watching fondly as she brushed hair back and separated some stalks into her lap. She was laughing, at least, the sorrow in her face almost completely gone. No longer did it seem to weigh her down after she had shed her tears in their hug.

The crack of wood brought him back to reality, so did the dirt in his face once he planted into the ground making the others around him laugh. Ugh, great, he hadn’t been made to eat dirt since he was a boy. 

“Come on pike-twirler, can’t you even set up a tent?” Oghren’s boisterous laughter along with that nickname he had so lovingly bestowed on the warden made him groan, sitting up as he wiped the dirt from his face. Looking up he caught blue staring at him, painted smile barely hidden behind a hand. Blood froze him in place but also set his cheeks on fire, vigorously wiping the rest of the dirt off as he scrambled off to fix his mess. His heart was a mess, his head was mad...Wynn’s advice had been sound but could he really do it? Who else could he ask?

Oghren, Sten, and Morrigan were absolutely out, for many different reasons but he would ask a darkspawn about love before he even dared to bring it up to Morrigan. Wynn, he had already tried and Hue would probably blurt it out, despite knowing the other Warden would only be helping, he wanted to do this himself. The dog? Okay, the dog was a better choice than some of the party but he needed someone to actually reply to him. Zevran? Okay, no, he tried that already and it was embarrassing enough. That left the only other one who could give him sound advice and was also a source of worry for him; Leliana. 

It would be another day of walking and night of camping before Alistair felt himself brave enough to broach the subject with the redhead. If Leliana had feelings for Sibylle he could find out easily and if she didn’t, maybe she would be inclined to help him. That did seem very much her style. Clearing his throat he sat down near her tent, a smile playing on her lips as if she already knew why he was there. She probably did, somehow, with her weird cleverness.

“So...you’re female, Leliana, right?”

“I am?! That’s news. When did that happen?” She feigned shock, a hand on her chest as she looked down at herself and he sunk his face into his hands. What in all of Thedas was wrong with him?!

“I just wanted some advice”, he groaned out, rubbing down his face as he looked up again, “What should I do if...if I think a woman is special and--”

“You want to woo her? Here’s a good tip: you shouldn’t question her about her female-ness.”

“All right, yes. Good point.” Maker, why was he cursed for some of the things to blurt out of his mouth sometimes? First Wynn, now Leliana, he is never going to live this down. Maybe he should quit while he’s ahead, who knows what bumbling he could throw himself into next.

“Why do you ask? Are you afraid things will not proceed naturally?” She places her chin on her hand, eyes alight with curiosity.

“Why would they? Especially when I do things like ask women if they’re female.”

“It adds to your charm, Alistair”, he raises an eyebrow at that, “ You are a little awkward. It is endearing.” Oh...great, just what he wanted to hear. That he was awkward. Awkward didn’t translate well over to making someone swoon. In fact, he’s sure awkward ended mostly with a slap in the face but curiosity made him question Leliana’s reasoning.

“So I should be awkward? Didn’t you just say _not_ to do things like that?” She rolled her eyes at him, scoffing a bit.

“Just be yourself. You do know how to do that, don’t you?”, Rubbing the back of his head he watched as she got up, sighing softly into the air, “ After all, it’s worked out so far.” Before he could even question her she entered into her tent, shutting the flap and essentially ending the conversation. Confusion swam through his head, not sure why she was so irritated with him, okay maybe questioning her female-ness did that. It felt like there was more though but no answers would find him here, making him retreat back over to the main campfire where Hue was stretched over a log. Hands behind a mop of yellow hair, the elf’s eyes scanned the night sky, barely giving Alistair notice as he sat on a nearby log.

“You look down in the dumps”, Alistair blinked, Hue hadn’t even moved his eyes from the sky but clearly he was talking to him. Nobody else was up except Shale and they were on the other side of camp. Thinking on it, Hue and him hadn’t been alone like this in a while. Ever since their group has grown all their attention had been on fighting and quests and politics and on everyone else but each other. Even the last day of Orzammar had Alistair locked out of their shared room, which he would have made more of a stink about until he saw the marks on his friend’s neck and he felt lucky he hadn’t been in there then. The cool, quietness of the night air gave him an idea, scooting to the end of his log to be closer to the laid-out elf.

“I’m wondering something”, ruby-like eyes finally looked over to him, head tilted slightly in the firelight, “ I’d like to know your thoughts about some of our...traveling companions. Do you mind if I ask?” Well that got the smaller man’s attention, swinging his feet to the ground as he sat up with a smile.

“Now that we’re alone, it’s time for the juicy gossip, I take it?”

“I’ve got this nefarious plan to go around to each of them and secretly tell them all the nasty things you said. That way they’ll mutiny and I shall become the group leader!”, the fake evil laughter bellowed from his throat, directed into the night sky as he put his hands to his hips, chest puffed out.

“Hah, cute! Just so you know, I’m laughing at you, not with you!”, Hue snickered when Alistair grabbed his chest, eyes wide with fake shock but the laughter couldn’t be stopped from his lips.

“Ouch. Now I’m wounded! Look at me, bleeding all over the place. You’re just not very nice, are you?”

“Never claimed to be”, they both laughed at that, settling back into sitting positions with an ease to their forms. 

“Seriously though, I’m only curious. I’ve had enough time to form my own opinions and I just want to see if yours are any different.”

“Only if you tell me yours too.”

“Just try and stop me.”, a grin played on his lips as he rubbed his chin, “Let’s see...where should I begin? How about Oghren? You must have an opinion on the smell at the very least.” His eyes traveled over the campfire to the tent the dwarf was sleeping in, even from this distance he could hear the loud snores rumbling from the flaps. Probably deep in another drunken slumber, the lucky bastard.

“Aw, what. I thought you two would get along.” A smirk snaked onto the elf’s face, hand on his cheek as his eyes stayed firmly on Alistair.

“As long as he stays downwind, sure. Once he’s had a bit to drink, however...forget that, there is no “bit to drink” with him” ,crossing his arms he tilted his head, chuckling a little as he thought back to earlier of the dwarf basically falling over himself.

“Can’t say I blame him, after everything he’s been through already”, there was a soft sigh from the other Warden, eyes flicking over to the same tent but with a much more pitiable expression, “If it’s too much though, I can talk to him?”

“No, no. That would just make it worse. Morrigan told him exactly what she thought of him and he actually drove her off with a string of expletives I didn’t even know existed.”, He started laughing thinking about her stomping off away from the bellowing dwarf, “ You should have seen it. She actually blushed. I was impressed. And then he vomited. Not so impressive.”

“Obviously he earned points with you there. I actually like him well enough myself.”

“I would, too, if he could stick to the ribald stories and not so much with the belching and projectile vomiting. How he lifts his warhammer is a bit of a mystery. Though I suppose the point is that he does lift it. And so long as we can point him in the right direction, he charges too. He has gusto, I’ll give him that.”

“He sure does”, Hue stretches back, taking a deep breath of night air before looking back at Alistair, “ Who's next?”

“ Zevran. You can’t...trust him, can you? Do you believe his so-called vow?” Red eyes were wide like a deer being spotted, as if he hadn’t thought Alistair would even ask that. Something complicated lay behind those eyes, but then a grin formed and the shadowed expression seemed to clear up instantly.

“Why? Are you jealous?”

“Well...no. Not really…”, Hue’s grin grew bigger, making him feel like he had to go on the defensive, “Of course not! It’s...It’s still a serious question. Do you believe him or not?”

“I actually do.” Alistair gazed hard at his friend but there was no sign of doubt in that face. Beyond anything that he could understand Hue had decided to believe in the assassin one hundred percent.

“Really? Why? That’s a lot of trust to put in someone who tried to kill you.” Seriousness began to melt from the elf’s face, replaced with a slight shade of red as eyes turned away. 

“He and I...uh, have a connection.” Alistair suddenly remembered their last day in Orzammar. How the two were standing much closer than usual...the marks on Hue’s neck that really couldn’t be explained as anything other than...well. Truth be told he hadn’t been able to question it since they had moved on so fast and the march along had left them little time to talk, especially with Hue constantly scouting ahead. So they did become intimate, at some point, then what was Zevran’s confused look about before? Because they weren’t before that or? Whatever, right now it was obvious even to him that Hue had feelings for the elf if his stupidly grinning face was anything to go by.

“Yes, the rest of us have noticed that.” That only seemed to make the elf blush more, making him chuckle warmly. So this is what it felt like to be on the other end of the teasing.

“Next person, please…”

“Hah, alright. What about Sten? The way he looks at me, with those eyes...creepy. And he’s so quiet for someone so big.”

“There’s no reason to be frightened of Sten”, the blush had calmed down, smile turning from embarrassed to sincere.

“I know. The more I talk to him, the more it seems like his philosophy is not so vile as the Chantry describes it. It’s an odd thing to think.”

“Chantry’s been wrong before.”

“Hmm. And yet he killed all those people. He doesn’t even deny it. Doesn’t that bother you?” There’s a scoff before light laughter spills out.

“We’re all killers, Alistair…”

“I don’t know if I like the sound of that. But I guess I take your meaning.” He sucked in air through his teeth, grimacing at the thought that yes they have killed more than darkspawn, “Mm. Moving on. What about Leliana? Is she crazy? Or do you really believe in her vision?”

“Don’t you believe in the Maker and all that too? I thought you would believe in religious visions and miracles.”

“Even the Chantry believes that most claims of visions and such are usually people’s minds playing tricks on them. Wishful thinking at best. I’m not sure what I think.”

“It could be true.”, Hue shrugs, “Who's to say? I think only the Gods could deny it or not.”

“Maybe you’re right. It’s not as if she could have known that we needed help so desperately, after all, yet there she was. I don’t know what to make of her. If you look at her when she doesn’t see you, she just looks so...so sad. I almost feel guilty for taking her away from her life.”

“She hasn’t had an easy time but it was her choice.”

“Yes, I know. Still, I feel badly for her”, Hue hummed in acknowledgement, “Alright. Morrigan. Do you trust her? Think about it...maybe Flemeth sent her with us for some other reason than she said.”

“Creators, you really don’t like each other, do you?” Despite such a question the elf was laughing, as if him and Morrigan’s strife just seemed to bring Hue enjoyment rather than the frustration that Alistair feels.

“Well aside from the fact that she’s a complete and utter _bitch_ , no...I don’t like her at all. Why? Do you?”

“I like her just fine actually”, again the wicked grin played on Hue’s face, a sign that he might start teasing the other, “ maybe she just reserves the bitchiness for you.”

“Great. I am thrilled beyond words. No, really.”, sarcasm was heavy on his words, he honestly didn’t care to hide it but that only made the elf laugh harder, “ How about a mage I actually like. Wynn? She’s rather motherly, don’t you think?”

“Sometimes? She’s a good person but sometimes I think...it’s like she’s been through a lot herself and can only see the bad outcomes.”

“What do you mean?”

“I got pulled to the side and was given advice on how bad Zevran was for me. To be honest I’m not surprised, the Keeper would probably do the same thing, but I think my relationship with Zevran is my choice. Whether it’s a good or bad choice, well, who knows. Isn’t that for me to find out though?” That...made a lot of sense. Actually, thinking back on when he eavesdropped, he kind of felt the same way. Whether his possible relationship with Sibylle turns out good or bad, isn’t it his choice to make? Shouldn’t she have more trust that they could carry out their duties even still? Well, I guess in her eyes they’re still just boys and she worries for them, it’s an odd feeling to be mothered for once. 

“You’re right. Although if he does hurt you I don’t think this group would let him off very easily.”

“Hah, you included?”

“Of course”, Hue’s still facing the fire but Alistair can see a warm smile on his lips, reaching over to pat the smaller man on the back, “ Okay. Shale, then.”

“Shale is a giant, stone golem who smashes things with their fists and is on our side. How is any of that a problem?”

“Alright, just because you think they’re _amazing_ doesn’t mean that it wasn’t fairly dangerous for you to reactivate them.”

“Jealous?” Alistair sputters.

“No! I’m not! Haah, you're killing me here!”

“Sounds like jealousy to me, I’m sorry you’re not my one and onLY!”, Hue laughs as he dodges Alistair’s hand coming at his mouth, sliding off the log with a plop. 

“Very funny, you’re so hilarious. I’m laughing so hard I just cracked my ribs, ow. Ouch. I don’t think I can go on anymore.”

“It’s okay, I’ll carry you honey.” The laughter comes out almost as a bark, shaking his head at the inane mental image.

“With how short you are? I’d be lucky to be dragged. No, please, I think I can manage on my own.”

“Ouch. One of the giants is making fun of my height. Get whacked by a branch.”

“I’m in the same category as Sten and Shale now?”, even though he was laughing about it, he actually felt a little proud even if that was odd, “ at least now you’re not the shortest member since we have Oghren.”

“You done about my height?”, hah, did he actually find something that Hue was sore about, now that was funny, “ because I noticed you didn’t ask me about Sibylle.” Shit. He was hoping the other wouldn’t notice but now the tables have been turned again. Currently the pout had been wiped clean from the elf’s face, replaced with that annoying little smirk he gets when he knows he has the upper hand. Hah, well...he’s not the same man as he was at Redcliffe. Maybe.

“Alright, fine. What do you think about her?”

“She’s pretty and smart, dangerous with that fire magic though.”, both men grimaced as they remembered her blazing through a group of darkspawn because they had decided to come after her, “ Okay, wait, she has almost hit you with fire and you question Zevran killing me?”

“She didn’t do it on _purpose_ like a certain assassin was.”

“Is this a thing Alistair? Are you into that?”

“Into what? What are you even talking about?”

“Are you into pain? Getting hit? Like is that what gets you off?”

“ _What?!_ ”, he swears he has never heard his own voice crack that bad but those questions just made his whole brain crash, “ _No?!_ What kind of--? Oh Maker’s breath I don’t want to know, please don’t tell me.” The heat in his face rivaled Sibylle’s fire, burying it deep within his hands with a groan.

“Wait...have you two not done it yet?”

“ _HUE!_ ” His voice was muffled by his hands but Hue only chuckled, patting his knee.

“Wow, I thought you two were farther than that”, He peeks an eye out from his fingers at the other, “I mean, you two looked close.”

“Really?”

“Uh, yea? You haven’t confessed to her yet?”

“No...I, well. I just don’t know what to say...I’ve never done this sort of thing before”, he lifts his head, fingers twiddling together as he leans his elbows on his knees, “ I mean, how did you two confess?”

“He asked me to sleep with him and I did. Or I did first then was interrupted so he finished it? That’s...not actually a confession though”, Hue rubs the back of his head, “ Listen, Alistair. Just be honest with her. You truly like her right?”

“Of course.”

“Then tell her that, tell her you think she’s beautiful and amazing and all that stuff you think about her. It’s all true anyway. Just be honest how you feel.” Alistair blinks, was it honestly that simple? Did he really just have to go up to her and say hey I think you’re beautiful and I might possibly love you? It sounded too easy.

“What if...she says no?”

“Then she says no”, Hue shrugs, moving until he was sitting between Alistair’s legs and looking up at him, “ You can’t control how other people feel and if she doesn’t feel the same way, then it hurts and you move on. But if you’re always afraid of no how will you ever find a yes?” Oh...wow. Suddenly it clicked, it really was that easy, wasn't it?

“Huh. Why are you smart sometimes?”

“Wow, that’s really rude!”, despite the emphasised hurt in his tone, Hue was only smiling up at the other, settling into his spot, “ of course if she’s mean about breaking your heart then I can always shoot her.”

“That really doesn’t sound like a joke when you say it.”

“Because it’s not…”, Alistair chuckles, ruffling the elf’s hair before Hue stops him, “ If we’re being honest. I’ve come to think of you as something like part of my clan or...maybe even a brother. I thought after everything that happened with me leaving my clan and then Ostagar I’d be swallowed up. I probably would be if you weren’t with me...so, I don’t know, have more faith in yourself, okay?” Eyes open wide as he stares down at the golden fluff of hair, he might not be able to see the elf’s face but he could sense it. That serious stare of his, eyes hard with resolve, with an unbreakable confidence that strengthens his own. Despite everything that has gone wrong since day one Hue has been by his side; for protection, back-up, a laugh, or just the comfort of having someone who understands you at your side. It hadn’t occurred to him that that might have been the same for the elf.

“ Hah, I guess it’s my turn to be asking if you’re the one in love with me”, Hue tried to swat his hand away but he ruffled his hair harder, chuckling, “I’ve always thought of you as a brother-in-arms Hue. That won’t change no matter what.” Another hum underneath him but Hue didn’t try to swat him away this time, leaning just a little more on one of his legs as they sat by the fire. Strangely this physical closeness has become something he’s gotten used to, like the elf has an underlying need to show his care through some kind of touch. Like a dog almost and speaking of dogs, Ruffles immediately took advantage of her master being on the ground to lay down next to them, her head gently resting on the elf’s thigh. Scratching behind her ear, Alistair watches the fire dance before them, wood crackling and popping as it brings the heat to life. Usually he’d find something to talk about, anything so he wouldn’t have to hear the silence rushing through his ears.

However, with his best friend sitting in peaceful silence that they may not get any other night, he, for once, is fine with the quiet.

Green. Edges of the Brecilian forest filled their vision no matter where they turned. Deep into the forest, paths were no longer that easy to find but Hue knew his way well. Whether by scent or sight, he was able to find them a place to stop. The plan was this: Hue would go introduce himself to the Dalish clan and explain the situation. He’d take one or two companions to do this but no more until he can make sure that the clan would be accepting. When brought to question he felt the clan might feel threatened if suddenly a whole group of warriors came stomping up to their front door, no matter if they were led by a Dalish elf. Which, honestly, was fair and Alistair trusted Hue to know what he was talking about. If the human had to be left in charge of the human politics, it only made sense that the elf be left to the elven ones. 

Which is why they were camped much earlier than they usually would be and without much to do except wait for Hue, Zevran, and Sten to come back, the rest were left to their own devices. Of course, that wasn’t all that different from how they spent their quiet nights but Alistair was antsy for much more different reasons. First, he had a plan, finally, was it a good plan? He had no idea but it was a plan and that surely was something. Second, in order to get said plan going, he had to get the person this plan involved alone with him. Harder to do since she was currently sitting with Leliana and Morrigan talking about who knows what. Leliana would be easier to convince, maybe, but he really did not want to start another fight with Morrigan in front of Sibylle.

What did Hue say, he couldn’t get a yes if he’s always afraid of a no. Right, he’s a Gray Warden, he faces down Darkspawn and is going to end this Blight with Hue. This was nothing, he could do this, he’s going to march right over there and ask to speak with her. That’s right, he’s walking over now, nothing can stop him and oh maker, she’s looking at him now. Right, plan, words, those are easy enough.

“I was wondering if you wanted to be alone.” _Oh for the love of!_

“No?”, Sibylle looked confused, a small smile on her lips as if she was trying to guess what he meant.

“With me, I meant! Alone with me!”, his voice cracked and now she looked less confused but more so amused, “To speak. Alone with me to speak, you know, with words. I can be good with those, I swear.”

“Yes, I’m quite aware you can be.”, Leliana was looking away but the slight shaking of her shoulders absolutely meant she was holding back her laughter. Morrigan, on the other hand, did not even bother to hide hers.

“Tis such a feat you can make yourself become even more a fool than usual! Will you fall on your face once more in a stupor, twas such an amusing sight before.”

“I just...if it is alright, can I speak to you alone for a moment?”, deciding to ignore Morrigan’s catty comments, he turned his sight back to Sibylle, shoulders rolled back with confidence. Blue eyes gave him a once over before she stood up, brushing off the front of her robes. With that silent affirmation he walked with her further from camp, until they were at least out of earshot of anyone he deemed could be listening. The sounds of birds and rustling of leaves filled the silence between them, golden strands of hair being brushed back from her face. It was a nice spot, the light filtered in through the leaves, creating gentle shadows along the forest floor. 

“You have me alone, what is it you wish to speak about?” Right, the plan. His hands came up before he remembered the other piece of the plan, reaching into his bag he had carried with him.

“Here, look at this. Do you know what this is?” He placed the item into her open hand, watching as she looked from it back up to him.

“New weapon of choice?”

“Yes, that’s right! Watch as I thrash our enemies with the mighty power of floral arrangements! Feel my thorns, darkspawn! I will overpower you with my rosy scent!”, with such a heroically dramatic voice and large sniff, he pretends to stab at the air, earning him a laugh at least, “ Or, you know, it could just be a rose. I know that’s pretty dull in comparison.” With a shrug of his shoulders he watches her gently touch a petal, clear sky eyes fixated to him.

“I don’t know, sentiment can be a pretty potent weapon.”

“Is it that easy to see right through me?”, her smile is as soft as those petals and he can’t help but smile back, “ I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I picked it in Lothering. I remember thinking, “How could something so beautiful exist in a place with so much despair and ugliness?” I probably should have left it alone, but I couldn’t. The darkspawn would come and their taint would just destroy it. So I’ve had it ever since.” Stepping closer, he looks down at the delicate flower in her hands, watching how gently she holds it.

“That’s a beautiful sentiment, Alistair.” Reaching out to hand it back to him, he gently pushes it back to her, making her look up with a question lingering in her eyes.

“I thought that I might...give it to you, actually. In a lot of ways, I think the same thing when I look at you.”, actual surprise coloured her face, eyes wide and he’s not sure if that’s a good thing or bad thing. She’s looking at him as if they had just met or that he’s suddenly had the answer to life itself. Nerves pounded away under his skin, the urge to run rising within his chest but then surprise slipped into knowing, smirk playing on the corner of her lips.

“Feeling a little thorny, are we?” _Hah, did she just?_ The laughter that came spilling out of his lips was still tinted with nerves but he felt more positive, relishing in the way she teases him.

“Wow. “She’ll never see through that”, I told myself. Boy was I wrong.” Tension broke between them, breathing became easier as the last of her edges seemed to melt. 

“Thank you Alistair. It’s a lovely thought.” 

“I’m glad you like it. I was just thinking...here I’ve done so much complaining and you haven’t exactly been having a good time of it yourself. I thought maybe I could say something. Tell you what a rare and wonderful thing you are to find amidst all this...darkness.” The rose was placed to her lips, almost the same shade as her lipstick as she peered through long lashes at him. This new expression made his heart speed up, body becoming warm like she had set an invisible fire upon him.

“Hmmm...so, are you proposing to me?”

“Ha! You won’t land me that easily, woman! I know I’m quite the prize, after all, no need to start crying on me or anything.” His hands gesticulated wildly, laughter ringing out as he did everything to hide the sure fire blush that was filling his face, “ Um, I guess it was, uh, just a stupid impulse. I don’t know...was it the wrong one?” His confidence felt on thin ice, cracking underneath the weight of his nerves. All it took was one word from her to lift him up or let him sink but her expression never changed, smiling fondly behind those petals.

“Mm, maybe not. It was cute.”

“Cute? _Cute?_ Just what I was aiming for. Ow, you could just...stab me in the face first before you say something like that”, she chuckled softly and he smiled at her, feeling the breath come back into his lungs as he started to speak faster, “ I’m glad you like it. Now...if we could move right on past this awkward, embarrassing stage and get right to the steamy bits, I’d appreciate it.”

“Sounds good. Off with the armor, then.” Huh? _Huh?!_ His eyes snap up to see her smiling, nodding her head like she was commanding him to get on with it. Heat flushed through his whole system and he knew he was red then. Choked, nervous laughter spilling from his lips like a flood. Wait, was she serious? He was only bluffing, was she really expecting him to make good on it? No way...

“Ha ha…Bluff called! Damn! She saw right through me!”

“You’re so cute when you’re bashful”, the air was knocked out of him once more and that goofy grin was frozen to his face, “ Why must it be a bluff?” Stepping closer, he could feel the heat of her skin so clearly it made him almost shiver. The rose kept a barrier between their faces, inches that could easily be closed and he lost it, brain flipping from how far he can push his luck to a full on retreat.

“Well, it...uh, doesn’t _have_ to be a bluff.” Good job him for keeping his voice calm and even a bit flirty, maybe he was better at this than he thought, “Well, I suppose we _are_ in the camp. The tent’s...right over there. This is true.”

“No time like the present, is there?” Was it hot outside? Surely it was the weather, that’s why he felt like he was sweating so profusely under his armor. Not because she was almost practically against him or giving him a look like she actually was serious about this. Oh maker, she actually might be a bit serious about this. Everything exploded under his skin and he could hear his voice crack, laughing nervously as he almost grabbed her arms but then moved them back to his side.

“ _I’ll be!_ ”, clearing his throat, he took a step back, grin wide on his face but his joints felt so stiff, “ I’ll be standing over here. Until the blushing stops. Just to be, uh, safe. You know how it is.” Before he even got an answer his feet took off, moving past her further into the woods until he was hidden by the brush. Leaning his forehead against one of the larger trees, he started to catch the breath that had caught in his throat. Armor felt so hot and heavy, like it suddenly weighed twice as much but he was laughing, even if he was a mess. She had meant that, there was no way she hadn’t meant that and if he had been a braver soul, they could have kissed.

Wait... _they could have kissed_. Smacking his head against the tree, he started laughing for a whole other reason. Despite the teasing, she had accepted his gift. She had accepted his feelings! The elation made his whole body feel light, punching the tree to force some of that explosive energy out. Ow, okay, no, no punching the tree. Tapping the tree, to the beat of his heart that is flinging itself to and fro inside of his chest and he’s laughing loudly, scattering the birds around him with his cheer. Should he run around? Dance? He has so much energy but he’s never felt so elated in his whole life. Shit, he has to tell Hue when he gets back! Back to the bark, he slides down the tree to the ground below, laughing all the way with no containment on his happiness.

Back in the clearing, unbeknownst to him, the person he had just left behind was looking fondly upon the rose until she hears his cheer echo from further in the woods. Laughter bubbles from her chest, his excitement even contagious to her.

“I suppose I was wrong, you really are quite special Alistair…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another fun, cute chapter full of dialogue and feelings and now we're heading to the Dalish Clan! While Hue starts exploring what his feelings are, Alistair gets to express his.


	21. Because I'm Dalish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “At the end of the day, it isn’t where I came from. Maybe home is somewhere I’m going and never have been before.” ― Warsan Shire

Fresh air rushed through his lungs, bringing life to the weariness that had laid dormant in them for some time. It was like breathing in a peace of mind, muscles relaxing the moment he exhaled. The wind gently rustling through the green above, the crunch of grass and dirt underneath, an animal or two escaping from sight; it all felt so familiar yet strange. Almost like he hadn’t seen this in years when it had only been a couple months. Subtle changes marked the foliage around them, alerting him to the passage of time. Within the human and dwarven cities he had lost track but nature was here, reminding him the seasons were about to change once more. Green would turn, colours like fire setting upon the trees as everything begins it’s harvest. Warmth stepping aside for crisp, cool air. A time where he would have been the busiest as a hunter, but now…

Time only had one meaning to him now, the longer they travel, the shorter the time grows to when he and Alistair would face the Archdemon. Simple joys like holidays and harvest, watching the trees change, the snow fall, rain gently sliding down the petals of new growth; none of it would matter if they couldn’t finish this. Still...he couldn’t stop himself from taking in the sounds and smells of the forest, letting it clear his foggy mind. Ruffles barked happily ahead, snuffling through some brush in an attempt to find what once was there. Would he be able to come back here again? Maybe, once the Archdemon is dealt with, he can bring Zevran with him and Ruffles to his clan and show him around. The Keeper would probably not be too thrilled but he’s sure Merril would think the Antivan interesting...Tamlen would have too. Will that hurt ever dull as well? When will he stop feeling like it should have been him and not his friend? Could he have done more, why couldn’t it have been both of them here? 

“I have a question for you”, startled from his spiraling thoughts, he looked to Zevran who had joined his side. In the tinges of brown and steel it had occurred to him that the other elf’s armor was as green as the leaves above their head. Camouflage...how had he not noticed that before? It was, after all, his favourite colour and gave the assassin quite the advantage here. Though their prey was definitely different, maybe Zevran was more suited to hunting than he previously thought. Green worked well with his skin tone too...ah, he’s staring again. Shit.

“Oh, yea?”

“How well-versed are you in poetry? Antivan poetry specifically.”

“Uh…”, confusion set upon his brow, when was the last time he heard any poetry, “ not an expert but I should know a good one when I hear it.”

“A-ha! Well trust me, you won’t be hearing it now”, Zevran laughed, hands behind his head as they walked, the good mood he was in since they left still lingered, “ It was recited to me, as I recall, by a rather wealthy target of mine.”

“Oh?”

“The symphony I see in thee, it whispers songs to me. Songs of hot breath upon my neck, songs of soft grunts by my head. Songs of hands on muscled back, songs of thee come to my bed.” Sten groaned not too far behind them, making Hue break out into a laugh. Of course it would be that kind of poem. 

“What is that? Sex poetry?”, he managed out between his laughter.

“So she claimed. She was trying to seduce me, you see, and somehow thought that this would actually convince me to spare her”, a chuckle spilled from Zevran’s lips, arms now crossed in front of him, “ I had sex with her anyway, but it goes without saying, she still had to die. The poem was amusing at the time, however, and thus I remembered it.”

“Wow…”, the elongated sound met with a cheeky grin, “So what, you thought to seduce me with it?” The Antivan’s shoulders shrugged in an exaggerated movement, tossing his own grin at the Warden.

“Hmm...now that is a thought, isn’t it? Would it work?”

“Hah, you wish!” Hiding the small blush on his face, Hue backhanded Zevran in the arms. He really didn’t want his mind going back to that bed in Orzammar. Thoughts that played out with Zevran whispering sweetened words in his ear, deep inside him as they made love once more. Alright body, now’s not the time, they were on their way to speak with the Dalish clan, he really did not need to feel like he was on fire. Desire leaked into every nerve, now that he knew what he could have, it was like he could never have enough. They hadn’t been able to properly do it again but that hadn’t stopped the two elves from kissing and well, touching. Honestly it surprised him how much power Zevran had over him, with just a few words or a touch and he was pulled to the other. It wasn’t just that though, was it?

Without warning he had started to feel his heart get involved, it’s strings fingered like a bow. With every kiss, touch, sweet word he could feel it drawn taut, ready to be released. Captured by the way words rolled from Zevran’s tongue, how amber eyes lit up when something amused him. The way that dark tattoo shifted form when he smiled and even the dark look he sometimes has when he thinks no one sees him. When had it started, long before Orzammar right? What was he to do if Zevran never shot that arrow? Everything engulfed him so quickly, hidden feelings he had no experience to recognise suddenly emerging from the shadows. There was war to worry about, the Blight, keeping everyone alive...so why now? Was it just finding comfort in short-lived pleasure with everything going wrong like Zevran says or did he actually…

“Personally my preferred methods of seduction are a bit more...tactile”, Zevran rubbed the arm that was hit, smirking at Hue, “ Here I thought you might be cheered up by some naughty poetry. You simply looked so...grim, such an unflattering expression for such a handsome face.” _Don’t do this. Don’t say things like that because it makes me confused, it makes my heart feel like it’s swelling up, ready to burst._ Silence filled his ears, the sounds of the wild quickly cut off until all he could hear was the beating of his own heart. He was sure he looked surprised. True, he had been lost in thought for most of the walk but he hadn’t realised his expression had been so dark. What startled him the most was Zevran bringing it up, like the Antivan actually was worried about him. That made a whole new set of unexplainable emotions rush through his mind but Zevran appeared like he didn’t think anything of what he just said, waiting on Hue for an answer. 

“I was...thinking how it’s almost Harvestmere and hunts would increase then”, it felt odd to speak about his old life, other than Alistair, he barely touched on it with the others, “ for meat and furs and such.”

“You hunted…”, Sten’s voice cut through, making him look back. It hadn’t been so much a question as a reaffirming statement.

“Yea, that was my job in the clan.”

“Practical.” A nod of the head told Hue that Sten had approved.

“Well, we all did our part to help the clan survive…”, another look of approval, seems Sten felt the same way. Of course, from the stories Hue had managed to get out of the Qunari, that felt like something he’d approve of anyway. Hue and Sten, at least, could agree on everyone doing what was right by the community and fulfilling their jobs to that end. Zevran, however, looked slightly confused.

“And why would that bring such a dark expression to your face?” Hue shrugged, trying to play it off.

“I miss it sometimes…”

“Ah, do you wish things could have been different? That you never became a Gray Warden?” What exactly was going on? Zevran usually avoided getting into deeper topics, most of the questions he ever asked Hue were surface subjects at least. Not to mention if Hue ever asked him anything personal, Zevran would play it off or dodge it completely. His heart sped up once more, thinking on the “why” the Antivan would be interested a little too hard.

“Sometimes? It...wasn’t easy but then I wouldn’t have met everyone”, he swallows, braving these next words, “ I wouldn’t have met you.” Another bout of silence, Zevran’s face was too neutral and that scared him...had he said the wrong thing? Been too forward? What if he scared the assassin off? Could Zevran tell that he maybe more than just desired him? Oh, this was giving him a blasted headache. Why didn’t he just ask?

_You know why._ Ah, right, for once in Hue’s life he is afraid of what someone thinks of him. Afraid that Zevran will want to leave or become disgusted with him...rejection. Even the thought makes him want to cry and he’d rather not say, keep the other by his side for now. Having Zevran leave scared him worse than facing the Archdemon...when had all these fears wormed their way into his heart? Speaking of, the Antivan had opened his mouth ready to say something before Ruffles came barreling up to them, dancing around Hue with a series of barks. Pushing against his legs with her head, he stumbles forward a bit until the anxiety clears from his ears, the bleating of Halla off in the distance giving him something else to think on as they move faster towards the clan.

“Andaran atish’an, my friend. You have come a long way. I give you the welcome of our clan”, a woman greeted the group through an arch in the trees, decked out in the steel armor most guards would wear, “ These are curious companions you have. Might I ask the purpose of your visit?” Hue could tell she was tense, even if he was here Zevran and Sten did nothing to quell her nerves. A long bow was settled on her back, to the untrained eye her arms looked relaxed at her side but he knew it wouldn’t take long for her to draw her weapon if she needed to. 

“I’ve come on behalf of the Gray Wardens, sister”, she blinked, looking him up and down in surprise. 

“The Gray Wardens? You...have joined their ranks? How unusual!”, awe had seeped into her tone, shoulders relaxed before she realised she had lost herself, “ Excuse my surprise...I will take you to the Keeper right away.” With a nod of his head, she signaled back the other two guards behind her. Following her into camp, he could feel eyes watching their every move, some with curiosity and others with trepidation. Such is the nature of a clan to always be on guard, he knew that all too well. Guards...hunters, a few on each of their sides. They kept in eyesight around the aravels and trees but Hue knew if any of them made a misstep, they would be surrounded in an instant. It was almost nostalgic to say the least.

“Hmm, I see we have a guest...and one of our own, no less”, the Keeper’s low, methodical tone reminded him of his own Keeper; knowing but stern. His eyes regarded him like a hawk, sharp like his nose. Bald head only seemed to make the vallaslin on his face stand out more. Robes decorated his body instead of armor; the greens and yellows folded into the cloth and leather to combat the long, steel staff he wielded. Hue could feel his body tense, he had to make a good impression here. Even if he wasn’t part of the clan anymore he was representing them still and the Gray Wardens...he had to do this right.

“He claims to have come on behalf of the Gray Wardens and…”

“I’m from one of the northern clans, Sabrae. My name is Hue Mahariel”, he bowed his own head politely, he could hear his Keeper’s voice scolding him once more about manners, “ I am also here for the Gray Wardens.”

“Mahariel? I see…”, eyes that once narrowed in suspicion seemed to gain interest in him, “ and a Gray Warden? How unusual one of our own should join their ranks. How did such a thing occur?” Fear suddenly grasped his throat, eyes still to the ground as it scratched the inside up, swallowing his voice in darkness. He almost forgot how to breathe, anxiety welling up inside his chest, as thick as the taint that ran through his blood. No one had asked him that yet, memories playing fresh through his mind, shattering like glass as he finally forced words from his tightened lungs.

“It’s...a long story. Maybe later?”

“Perhaps so.”, relief washed over him quickly, he’s not sure if he’s ready to tell that tale yet, “ At the moment I’m afraid I have little time to spare for long talks. Ma serannas, Mithra, you may return to your post.” The woman nods, leaving them alone with new found tension. He hadn’t felt it initially when they walked in...but something was not right.

“Is everything okay?”

“First, let me properly introduce myself, I am Zathrian, Keeper and hahren of this clan. If you came to bring news of the Blight in the south, it is not needed. I had already sensed its corruption. I would have taken the clan north by now, had we the ability to move. Sadly, as you can see, we do not.”

“So their first reaction to trouble is to flee from it? Curious.”, Sten’s remark was soft but reached their eyes. Zathrian, however, seemed to ignore it as he carried on.

“Do not allow our troubles to burden you, though I suspect they may impact your mission.”

“What do you mean?”

“I imagine you are here regarding the treaty we signed centuries ago. Unfortunately, we may not be able to live up to that promise we made.”, a sigh spilled from the older man’s lips, waving his hand towards the camp, “The will require some...explanation. Please follow me.”

“This won’t be good…”, Zevran’s curt reply was right on mark as they followed the Keeper further into the camp. Cots laid out in groups, cries and wails from thrashing elves dying on them greeted his vision. Blood soaked their bandages, tears across their flesh and clothes looked like bear claws but the smell of wolf was too keen. Of wolves and blood and...death.

“The clan came to the Brecillian forest one month ago, as is our custom when we enter this part of Ferelden. We are always wary of the dangers in the forest, but we did not expect the werewolves would be lying in wait for us. They...ambushed us, and though we drove the beasts back, much damage was done. Many of our warriors lie dying as we speak.”

“So the werewolves…”, Hue looked at each body; proud warriors grimacing in pain as blood drains from their body, as curses claw under their skin. His clan had never encountered them before, never been this south but he had heard of these vicious beasts that stood like men and more deadly than bears. Wolves were cunning but ultimately left them alone unless a hapless fool happened to wander into them. But to face a pack of werewolves…

“Even with all our magic and healing skill, we will eventually be forced to slay our brethren to prevent them from becoming beasts”, Zathrian finally turned to face Hue, sadness colouring his eyes, “ The Blight’s evil must be stopped, but we are in no position to uphold our obligations. I am truly sorry.”

“I could look into it”, the Keeper’s eyes widened at Hue’s proclamation, seeing the serious look paint the young elf’s face, “ there has to be a way to cure them.”

“The only thing that could help them must come from the source of the curse itself, and that...that would be no trivial task to retrieve. Especially as there are only three of you…”

“I have more people. I was going to ask permission if we could camp close by since I have humans with me.”

“I see. You left them behind on purpose”, Hue wasn’t sure what that look was for and didn’t get a chance to ask, “ But yes, within the Brecillian forest dwells a great wolf--we call him Witherfang. It was within him that the curse originated, and through his blood that it has been spread. If he is killed and his heart brought to me, perhaps I could destroy the curse, but this task has proven too dangerous for us. I sent some hunters into the forest a week ago, but they have not returned. I cannot risk any more of my clan.”

“Alright, I’m sure I can hunt down a wolf…”

“I must warn you that more than werewolves lurk in the Brecillian forest. It has a history full of carnage and murder, you see”, Zathrian walks with Hue until they are back in front of the Keeper’s aravel, “ Your group may camp closer and trade here, Da’len. If you have questions, my first, Lanaya, or Sarel, the clan’s storyteller, could provide you with answers easily.” With that Zathrian nodded to him, leaving them alone within the camp. First things first, he would have to visit the Master and see if he can get his bow fixed...or at least get a better one at this rate.

With Sten and Zevran looking around for themselves, Hue heads to the master craftsman, overhearing him berate his apprentice for some bad wood. Ah, seems things never change no matter what clan you’re in. He remembers Master Ilen also being quite strict, yelling at a much younger Hue for how badly he damaged his bow once. Wonder what the old man would say now if he saw the state his current bow was in.

“Andaran atish’an, friend! It has been some years since I met Master Ilen at the last gathering. He is still hale, I hope?”, the master regarded Hue with a smile, it seems some of the hunters had already spread gossip quickly on who Hue was.

“He was fine when I saw him last.”

“That is good to hear. Your clan is more familiar to us than most, since we do not stray far from each other in this land”, the master crossed his arms, looking Hue up and down, “I met your father, for he was once keeper of your clan. You carry many of his features. He spoke at a gathering, telling the clans that more of us need to voyage into the shemlen world and learn their ways. He would be proud to see his son a Gray Warden, I think.” Hue blinked, he hadn’t expected to hear any of that. Barely anyone speaks of his father and mother, especially in his clan, so to hear that his own father would have been proud of him was...jarring to say the least.

“Thank you, that’s kind of you to say.”

“Our people speak so little of the dead, especially those who end in...in tragedy. I thought you should know, regardless.”

“I thank you for that”, awkwardness made him shift, pulling his bow out to change the subject, “I heard you were quite skilled, master.”

“I do not make bows as fine as Master Ilen’s, perhaps, but mine have caused more than one shemlen to drool at the thought of possessing them. There is wood that, if treated properly, is as hard as steel but far lighter. It grows only in this forest--ironbark.” That stopped him, placing his bow on the table as he looked up as the older elf. 

“If I found some for you, could you possibly…?”

“I’d be hesitant to ask but if you do find some in your travels, I would be most grateful. It’s blue and very distinctive. You can only harvest the bark which has fallen off the tree from age. If you find some, bring it to me and I’ll craft it for you.” Hue’s face lit up, a smile almost splitting it as he thought of the future bow he would soon have in his hands.

“You have yourself a deal!”

The first time he had met any Dalish had been a bad experience; bandits who treated him worse than the Crows did. Thus why the poor elven boy had gone back to such a house under the Crows instead of sticking it out. Had the clan been like this one here or Hue’s...maybe he could have had a much different life. It was a thought...he would have been a much different person and would he have met the Warden if that had been the case? Probably not, despite the unnecessary regrets of not having a normal childhood, he has to admit nothing in his life has ever been boring. Pretending to study the dirtied and cracking statues nearby, his ears were trained on Hue and the surrounding Dalish. Elven was spoken, words he couldn’t guess at, but there was common too and most of it seemed to involve his Warden. _The_ Warden, correction.

Mahariel. Another surprise in the elf’s pack was the fact that he had a family name and it traveled through the camp in as much surprise as Zevran felt when he first heard it. Hue never talked about his clan, about himself and even though it’s been months, Zevran realises he knows only so much. True, it was a lot compared to anyone else, he certainly knew the elf’s body. Then there’s the dark shadow that passes over the younger man’s face from time to time; sadness and regret. _Leave it alone_ , he’d tell himself, _if you find out you’ll know more and the more you know, the harder it is to detach._ Curse his curiosity, he just had to know, Hue had entertained him, listened to his stories and was always there...of course he’d be curious. A family name was nothing to sneeze at, Zevran’s own was simply a house name by extension, he did not own it more so than it owned him.

In the passing tongues of the gathering elves he could hear them speak. Of Hue’s father being a Keeper, of his family name, was he one of the hunters at the last gathering? Thoughts and steps had him casually following the other around, after all he had swore an oath to keep Hue safe and just because they were in a Dalish clan didn’t mean safety was guarenteed. Leaning around some of the trees, his eyes fixed to the carvings of one of their traveling wagons, he spies some elven women approach Hue. Hue, who had been talking to another and petting one of the Halla, a white deer with magnificent horns. How he gently held his forehead to the creature, whispering something and calming the creature down. It was a gentleness that the usual rambunctious elf rarely showed, the softness melting any sharp edges he had. An interesting sight indeed.

“Excuse me”, he heard the two elven women grab Hue’s attention, around the same height as his warden and maybe age, “ We are sorry, we overheard you speaking to the Keeper. You are from the Sabrae clan?”

“Yea, though they’re up north now.”

“Um, I hope this isn’t strange but we saw you once at one of the gatherings”, He moves around a tree, ears trained closer to hear this conversation, “ You and the other hunter brought in a bear. It was very exciting!” They giggled at Hue’s blush, the way he rubbed the back of his head but his brows were drawn, as if the memory was painful to him. The girls, however, brushed their hair back, moved in a way that suggested interest...ah, right. They are interested in him, aren’t they. That much is obvious.

“Yea, I remember doing that…”

“Are you bonded yet?” The other girl spoke up, stopping Hue’s hand in the air as he looked shocked, “ You were such a good hunter and you are a Gray Warden. Do you have an interest?” Thank the Maker for his foresight to pretend to be studying a carving because out of the corner of his eye he sees Hue look over at him before back at the girls. Now that was telling...these women were expressing quite an interest in the Warden, not that he could blame them as he did the same thing. However, with that quick look, it was obvious that Hue’s “interest” lay in him and that filled him with equal parts pride and anxiety. No, of course Hue’s interest would be with him, they were physically intimate and with how they had to travel, the fact that Zevran was always there with him...it made sense. No need to read more into this, absolutely no need.

“I’m...flattered really”, Hue was rubbing the back of his head again, looking a bit sheepish with a chuckle, “ but I have to decline. As a Gray Warden, I will probably never go back to the clan. I’m sorry…” They seemed to be understanding, disappointed though and offered to him they’d be around if he changed his mind. There was an odd look in Hue’s eyes as they left, like something else was being chipped away off the Dalish man. Now that just won’t do...with a casual step, he moved closer to the Warden, startling him from his thoughts.

“Well, well, you are quite popular, no?” Zevran chuckled, nudging Hue’s shoulder with his and gaining a soft laugh from the other.

“Probably because I’m Dalish…”

“Most likely”, he hums, something in him spilling words out before he can think, “ do these bondings get very wild?” A blink, Hue looking at him incredulous before the Warden started laughing.

“I guess marriage can be wild.”

“Huh?” Okay, now it was his turn to be confused. Bonding was...love-making right? They had been interested in him and wanted to sleep with him, correct? 

“Bonding is marriage. They were asking if I was interested in marrying.” An almost smug look passed over Hue’s face, like he had just gotten one up on the Antivan but Zevran’s own thoughts let that pass. They had asked to marry him so casually, was this a common occurrence? True, Hue was a handsome man and he was strong, caring, loyal...wild. It hadn’t even dawned on Zevran that people might want his warden...the warden for much more than just pleasure. 

“Do Dalish just marry that easily?”

“Huh? No, not really that’s why I was a bit surprised”, a blush coloured Hue’s cheeks, “ I mean, usually you bond to a person you love but I guess there are cases where they might want the best hunter or the strongest warrior.”

“Ah, so in other words, very similar to noble marriages”, Hue cocked an eyebrow at that but Zevran didn’t feel like explaining, “ here I thought they simply wanted to experience such a handsome man for themselves.” He expected the Dalish man to blush, maybe laugh nervously, or even backhand him again in an attempt to hide his shyness but Hue just stared at him, boring into his soul once more. A smile made its way onto that face.

“Hmm, sadly for them I’m already being experienced by a certain someone and I’d like to keep it that way.” With a wink Hue walked further into the camp, speaking to more of the Dalish that have gathered around him and leaving Zevran to that. For once, the Antivan could almost feel himself blush.

The trip back to camp had been easy but it had already been night when they emerged into the clearing, making plans to move camp closer to the clan in the morning. Alistair had gotten ahold of him as soon as they came in, pulling him from the others with an excitement he hadn’t seen in the human in a while. Apparently this news couldn’t wait before Hue ate but he honestly couldn’t blame the man when he heard, it seems that the confession worked. He was honestly proud for the man, laughing at how much happiness was vibrating through the other, like Alistair couldn’t keep still at all. Usually he was the one flitting about but then again, maybe this was just another aspect of love. Maybe one day he’d know what it felt like to be in love with someone and have them return it…

Dinner went by easily, Zevran bringing up his family name and him having to endure the questions that came with it. Alistair had already known, they were introduced by Duncan to each other, but the others had him explain. How his father was a keeper, how clan names came from Dalish nobles a time ago and that his family name was from one of the Emerald Knights that served a noble before. Honestly he never felt anything from that, he had never known his parents or was treated special for being a Mahariel; he just was. Was being from a knight family that held no real significance now really so grand? Maybe it made him look special to outsiders but to him it had simply been a name.

“Zevran has one though.”

“My name is a house name, not a family name”, Hue cocks an eyebrow, okay so what was the difference, “ your name comes from a place of prestige. Mine comes from a place of ownership.” Ah, right. Zevran had been bought by the Crows, it probably was another reminder to the elf of who exactly owns him. 

“Sorry…”

“No harm”, and he looked like he meant that, smiling at Hue, “ you are an orphan too?” Oh, that’s right, he had never...talked about his parents before to anyone. Not even Alistair who was looking over at him with as much curiosity as the rest. Maybe...maybe it was time to talk a little bit.

“Yea, well, I was raised by the clan. My father was the previous Keeper of our clan and he fell in love with a woman from another clan. Though I guess they weren’t on good terms? Either way he bonded with her and she was brought over to our clan.”, He could feel the necklace underneath his armor, heavy against his neck as he spoke, “ They were walking together one day and were ambushed by human and elven bandits. They killed my father, and my mother, who was pregnant with me, got away with injuries. They told me that some time after she gave birth to me, she got up and walked out into the woods...never to be seen again.” Silence had drifted around the group, everyone’s eyes on him and the crackling of fire sent ashes into the night sky.

“Do you think she might be alive?” Alistair’s question knocked around in his head but he only sighed.

“Probably not, but even if she was, she’s been dead to me my whole life. I wouldn’t know her anyway”, it felt rough, almost heartless, saying that about the one who gave birth to him but it was how he felt, “ Besides, Ashalle raised me well and I had the clan looking out for me. She is more my mother even if we aren’t blood-related.” 

“Thank you for sharing this with us”, he felt Leliana’s hand on his back, looking up to her softened face, “ you don’t speak much of yourself. I’m afraid you know more of us than we ever have of you.”

“I just...it wasn’t on purpose I just never thought to say anything”, now he felt embarrassed, he had questioned them a lot of their pasts and cultures after all, “ so much has been going on after all. And I left the clan in...a weird way.”

“What do you mean?”

“I…”, he’s still too afraid, too raw to speak of Tamlen so he tries something else, “I was conscripted by Duncan, so I agreed to leave the clan. Part of me didn’t want to because I don’t know if I will ever see them again, it wasn’t quite a happy goodbye even if they told me they were proud of me.” 

“Oh”, Alistair looks at him with a bit of pity, their conscriptions had fostered much different feelings in each of the wardens. “ if you had the chance, would you go back?”

“And leave you behind? You’d be dead in a week…”, he grinned and Ohgren bellowed out a laugh, slapping his knee as Alistair raised his voice. The once somber air now sparked up in commotion as everyone started to speak, Morrigan raising an opinion that Alistair wouldn’t even last an hour, possibly tripping himself to death which led to another snide fight between them. Laughter rang out between and Hue watched all his friends interacting in various ways, some joining in, some egging it on, and others trying to calm it down. As much as he missed the clan he wouldn’t give any of this up, he had made a new family right here and now.

After the camp managed to calm down, everyone going to their various tents or spots to settle down or prepare themselves for the morning, he decided to go out into the woods once more. The forest during the night was a much different beast, twinkling stars peeking in from between the swaying leaves and the soft moonlight making spotlights here and there between the shadows. Air was calmer, much more still and even a branch breaking or the distant sound of a nocturnal animal could be heard. He had made a big leap today, talking about some of his past with the group and he felt much closer to them because of it.

Currently what sent his mind in a frenzy however was the Antivan, remembering the line he had left Zevran with before hurrying away into the Dalish camp. How the hell had he managed to say that and with such a straight face? Why had Zevran been so interested in the fact those girls were interested? Why had those girls been interested in the first place? Sure, he was a great hunter but that didn’t mean he’d be a great husband! Solving the problem with the two lovers in the camp too hadn’t helped, making him think about a future he wanted but wasn’t sure could exist. Damnit Hue, there were wolves to be hunted! Werewolves! Creators, the damn Blight even! Punching a nearby tree with a grunt, he startled to see golden eyes staring at him from beyond the trees.

“You seem very distraught by something”, a low, womanly voice drifted from those golden eyes, “ are your thoughts tangled in frustration?”

“Who in blazes are you?” His shoulders tense, fists at his side as he got ready to draw his bow. Even with such a threatening stance, she only seemed amused by him, chuckling as she stepped more into the light. A dalish woman...older than him and slightly taller but beautiful nonetheless. She had long, waving red hair that spilled down and red Vallaslin of Sylaise delicately tattooed on her face, accenting golden eyes. Her robes clung graciously to her curves and she just smiled at him, arms crossed under her bosom.

“I hope a friend but I know who you are”, again her tone stayed even, she showed no fear and he was suddenly reminded that he hadn’t heard or smelt her nearby at all, “ tell me, Warden Hue, what do you know of this clan? Of this curse?”

“The werewolves? That they’re attacking the clan and the curse needs to be lifted to help”, ah, maybe she was from the clan. He hadn’t seen a Second when he was there, maybe this was she and she had been out. So was it the Keeper that sent her here? Why? And why wait until he was out of camp?

“Hmm. So nothing at all”, she tapped a finger to her chin, “ my advice is this. Things are not always what they seem, question what is around you, especially in this forest. For if you do not, the clouds will never lift.” His shoulders sagged in confusion, what exactly was that supposed to mean?

“What do I question then?”

“You will know when you come upon it”, a step back into the shadow, her red painted lips smiling at him, “ do take care so we can meet again. You have quite the future ahead of you.” Thoughts stopped short, opening his mouth to call out to her as she disappeared in the shadows of the trees. Running over he looks to and fro, finding nothing there but brush and the cool night air. Disappearing...as if she had never been there. Was that a spirit of the forest? Warning him of what...of who? Whatever she was, it had cleared his mind to the task ahead. Tomorrow they would set camp and then venture into the forest, there maybe they could find the answer to the curse...and to whatever this warning was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Andaran atish’an: Enter this place in peace. A formal elven greeting  
> Ma serannas: My thanks./Thank you.  
> Aravel: A wagon used by the Dalish; also a physical and spiritual path, a journey with purpose. Humans call them "landships."  
> Hahren: Elder; used as a term of respect by the Dalish as well as by city elves for the leader of an alienage.  
> Shemlen: The original name elves use for the human race; continues to see use as a slang term amongst the City Elves ("shems") even though its meaning has largely been lost; literally "quick children".  
> Vallaslin: Blood writing; The art of tattooing adopted by some elves to more prominently display their worship of the traditional elven pantheon.  
> Keeper: Clan leader and keeper of the clan's lore, knowledge (magical and physical). Mage.  
> First: First apprentice to the Keeper, also a mage  
> Second: Second apprentice to the Keeper, also a mage.
> 
> The mysterious dalish elf has the Vallaslin of Sylaise, the Hearthkeeper, is the goddess of all the domestic arts and the sister of Andruil the Huntress. Sylaise gave the elves fire, and taught them how to weave rope and thread, and to use herbs and magic for healing purposes.
> 
> Hue's Vallaslin is actually Ghilan'nain, the Mother of the halla—white deer-like creatures revered by the Dalish and used to pull their aravel, or "landships"—and goddess of navigation.
> 
> Since this is fantasy medieval times, people from poor families do not have last names. Nobles do and some middle class families who copy the nobles as well. From one of the DAO writers: clan names are descended down from Elven nobles and a Dalish would refer their last name as the clan name (see Dalish Inquisitor in DAI) but Dalish family names come from the Emerald Knights who served the nobles and were passed down. Thus the Dalish warden Mahariel is descended from an Emerald Knight. 
> 
> Zevran's last name is said to be from the Crow house he was bought into.


	22. Gifted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You will always fall in love, and it will always be like having your throat cut, just that fast.” ― Catherynne M. Valente

She can never forget the smell of parchment. How could you when you lived in a place that was mainly a library in a glorified prison? The smell of old tomes, of dust being riled up from mages, and of herbs brought in for potions and components; the scent of ordinary days. Ferelden circle’s library was large, granted she hadn’t been to another circle to compare, but it seemed large to a child at least. Seven years from seven years old was a long time for the large to become small, for the vast to become contained. Despite that it was still the place she would most often go, the alternative being the apprentice quarters and having to listen to the others prattle on about some gossip or the children being noisy yet again was not a preferred activity of hers. Maybe someone would set something on fire again by accident, that was at least exciting when it happened amongst the row of books. Though she was on a particular mission that day, swiping some freshly baked treats from the kitchen area and hiding them in her robes. 

Who would have stopped her other than that troublesome old man Greagoir anyway? The main library had rows of tall bookcases along it’s walls and sectioned off into three areas by more of them. Since this was the common library one could always see apprentices, mages, and even templars mingling in here; reading or gossiping or doing whatever else they do. Frankly she didn’t care, it was all very boring to her anyway. What was not boring was the fact they had new blood come in and to find out this one was close to her age! Oh how the mages and older apprentices wagged their venomous tongues about this boy who would not speak to anyone. 

Not to mention escaping so soon after he was brought here but what irritated Sibylle the most was that the First Enchanter didn’t even punish him at all! What made this one so special then? Because he did not talk? When she had tried to escape years ago she had only tried once...because if she had done so again she was told out-right that she would be made Tranquil. There were no second chances, or so she was led to believe. That’s why she wanted to see this one for herself, to question and observe him. Also maybe to tease him with the treats and establish the pecking order here. Lucky for her that the adults never stopped running their mouths because she soon found where he would often hide, in one of the storage rooms on the upper level with windows. A small body curled up under one of them, obviously crying into his robes, the top of his dark blonde hair facing her, and that just made her roll her eyes. Always with the crying…

“You’ve come to the windows just to cry under them? I hear that’s all you do”, shoulders jolted as he realised he was no longer alone, her voice as clear as the spring air coming through. Legs were folded in, knees to his chest as he had his arms wrapped around and Sibylle could see some sort of fabric...a pillow cradled to his body. She had expected him to cry louder or run off, face ugly with snot and tears. The eyes that met hers were much too familiar for her to be comfortable; brown instead of blue but it held the anger she knew all too well, the storm that swirled inside of her. Defiant, challenging, he was trying to glare her down and it was admirable at least.

“Here…”, even though she was going to use them as bait, she ended up giving one to him anyway, sitting across on the floor, “ don’t look at it like that, just take it. I’m only giving it to you because you’re not being a chicken shit.” Eyes blinked, anger morphed into confusion as she practically shoved the pastry to his face. Hands a bit shaky, he managed to take it, contemplating whether it was a good idea or not before taking a bite. He still looked entirely ungrateful about it and even though he didn’t say a word, she could tell exactly what he was thinking.

“So, can you actually speak?”, it takes a moment but he, at least, nods his head, “ Are you going to speak to me?” This time he shakes his head. Well, at least he was consistent with it. 

“What? Are you rebelling against everyone by not speaking? Good luck with that, nobody is going to care.”, she can see his brows start to furrow, “ Pity only goes so far in here, you’d be smarter if you found a way to be useful so they don’t think of you as disposable. If that upsets you then either cry or get angry about it, not _both._ ” His jaw tightened, like he actually wanted to say something to her but seemed to remember his silent oath and looked away. Polishing off her own pastry, her eyes scanned over his tiny frame once more. He was younger but probably not by much, legs and arms thin under sagging robes. Like the wet fur of an animal hanging from their limbs, he looked as if the clothes would swallow him whole. Dirty blonde hair was hanging as a curtain, parted enough for her to see his face. Usually cheeks would be fuller on a child his age but he was thin here too; sharp, brown eyes set hard like stone and his nose was beaked, sharp. They had said he wasn’t entirely Ferelden and she supposed not, he certainly didn’t look much like the other Ferelden children here. Of course she didn’t look very Ferelden either, another thing they seemed to have in common. 

It wasn’t worth it to be polite to this kid, after all, he was obviously not looking for friends. If he wanted to be mad at the templars, then be mad, but she supposed she couldn’t blame him for snubbing the mages as well. Some of them were worse than the templars in her opinion.

“I like that anger though…”, his head snaps back to her, brows drawn down tight, “ means you got more of a head on you than the others. How about this, we don’t have to be friends but you and I can at least make a truce. Watch each other’s backs here? I don’t give a damn about crawling up the ranks and it seems you don’t either, but we can at least keep each other alive. Yes or no?” There was a long pause where he just stared at her like she was insane and maybe she was, asking some new kid such a thing. Well, even if he said no it’s not like she loses anything but if he said yes then maybe they could have at least one person in this prison they could trust. Patience she at least had but it was still trying, watching him look her over, thinking about her words in such an obvious manner. Finally he nodded his head, slowly and with trepidation but a nod nonetheless. 

“Alright, are you going to talk to me at least?” A head shake, she honestly didn’t expect anything less.

“How about your real name?”, another head shake, harder this time and she sighed, “You actually want me to call you by that nickname everyone has given you?” 

A nod, though it came with some hesitation.

“Fine…”, she stood up, brushing off the skirt of her robes before extending a hand to him, “ You can just call me---”

“Sibylle!” Background morphed, like a flash of light she was suddenly in one of the main hallways. Older now, she had just risen from her bed but still felt drained. Ah...she had just had her Harrowing. Name was called again and a boy rushed to her, hugging her with enough force that threatened to topple them both over. The hit rattles a groan from her lungs, lightly slapping his head in admonishment. 

“You’re too big to be running into me like that, you brat”, he laughs, letting her go and she could see the worry behind those eyes, hidden in a smile. Almost as tall as her now but soon he’d be taller; the thought annoys her a little bit.

“ I suppose if you can scold me then you’re fine”, another laugh, his smile looks more natural now as the worry melts away.

“Hah! Of course I’m fine, no damn demon was going to possess me.”

“What demon would even want to?”

“Most people seem to want this body”, she grinned when he rolled his eyes, “Were you actually worried about me?”

“Karl said the Harrowing was...well, that it was bad. Terrible personality aside, I’d still hate to see you gone.”

“Ew, you did worry for me”, words contradicted her smile, both walking together down the hall, “Well, if I had to be honest, I wouldn’t want to do it again.”

“It’s almost like they set mages up just to fail for an excuse to put them down…”

“Maybe some of them hope we do but I do feel more clarity”, out of the corner of her eye she sees him bite his lower lip, eyes looking to the ground, “If you’re so worried just become my apprentice.”

“Hah, I’m only two years younger than you, do you really think you could be my teacher?”

“Of course, I’m better at magic than you are.” Laugher rang from her throat at his incredulous expression, like he wanted to argue with her but couldn’t come up with the words. She was right of course, they both knew that, but it was still fun to tease him about it. Bubbles seemed to form in her chest, rising up with laughter until they consumed her in a blinding light. Everything melted around her, the walls and cracks and stone and him until she could see nothing but white. She was floating, body dissolving into the void until she feared there’d be nothing left of her. Until eyes fluttered open, squinting at the sliver of sun that peeked through the flap of her tent and onto her face. Damn, when had that come open?

Sitting up slowly, she runs a hand through golden strands of bed hair, a yawn playing on her lips. Birds twittered somewhere overhead and the crisp air made her shiver. Dreams of the circle happened every once in a while and it always centered around these times, thanking the Maker once again that he had not been there when Uldred unleashed upon the tower. Escape had always been synonymous with him, how many rules and measures did the Circle implement for his creative ways? It brought another chuckle just thinking about it but she did worry, was he okay? Was he staying safe? Eating? Did he finally manage not to be caught again? Whatever people said about his “troublesome” and cowardly personality she’d always remember that angry, empathetic boy with lofty ideas.

Mornings were always a quiet affair amongst the camp, some better suited to the early rays of the sun rather than others. Sitting on the chilled grass, his eyes stare through the small fire, into a distance locked away in his mind. Hallas bleated off between the trees, signaling their own morning routine as he bit into his bread once more. It felt like ash upon his tongue, dissolving without a hint of a taste but his mind did not care. The other night still played back in his head, the strange woman in the woods with no answers. His first reaction was to bring it up to his companions but he...hadn’t. Something wasn’t sitting right with him, the way her words weaved doubts about his own people and without much evidence of her even being real, it felt better to keep it under wraps for now. Another secret to his small pile, string drawn tightly in some sickening hope that he may never have to open that bag up. 

Fearing what other people think of you wasn’t a concept he could say he was used to. Maybe that was the problem with his sheltered life before; he knew his clan and they knew him, there was no fear of being left behind. Here he must adhere to a caution that he’s never used before...well, as well as he can, unfortunately he was as subtle as a Mabari. Maybe Zevran and Leliana could give him some pointers on that. It’s not like he wanted to keep these secrets to himself, Creators know he’s had the urge to at least talk to Alistair about it. Unfortunately once he gets in conversation with the human a small, nagging voice drives the stake of fear deeper into his heart and words fail him once more. Maybe once they figure this werewolf thing out he can sit down and talk to everyone about the lady, at least then he wouldn’t feel like he was seeing things.

Stretching his arms to the sun, he unfurls relaxed muscles and gets them started on the day. Scouting was the name of the game for the morning, now that their camp was closer to the Dalish, he was itching to get the lay of the land. Especially if they were on a hunt, any sort of hidden path or heavy brush could mean an advantage or death for someone not prepared. Getting an idea of the forest skirting the Dalish camp leaves them less blind and so he holsters his bow and quiver, thinking it would be nice if he could find that wood for Master Varathorn too. 

“You are heading out this early?” Blonde hair fluttered near him, arms crossed lightly.

“I need to scout the area, I’m not familiar with this south of the land.”

“Good point”, a hum as she looked him over, “ Do not tell me you are going alone…”

“Uh yea? I usually do.”

“When we’ve already been warned of several dangers? Don’t be reckless, Hue”, her tone seemed rather tired, like she’s had this conversation so many times and yet he can’t recall that they’ve ever had, “ I’ll go with you then, if that is not a problem.”

“Not really, are you up for it?”

“ I could use the space”, without even waiting for his response she finds her pack and staff, “ Also I do believe it’d be best for us to take Sten at least.”

“What? Why?”

“Hue, if we do run into trouble we are going to need the help and if we are scouting, Sten is the only warrior who can keep quiet.” Okay, well yea, she did have a point there. Sten, despite being a massive giant, could sneak up on a man no problem. Still...she seemed oddly stoic, of course he hasn’t really talked to her as much as everyone else, maybe she was more serious than he originally thought. Curves of lips pointed to the ground, eyes seemed distracted even though she was looking at him...it was like she was angry or restless but keeping the lid shut tight. 

“Or we could take Oghren if we could wake him up”, okay now there was a more natural face, nose wrinkling up in disgust at the very notion.

“It is too early to make such jokes”, he laughs softly at that, “plus quiet does not seem to be in his vocabulary.”

“True enough. I’m sure Sten wouldn’t mind anyway.”

Indeed, he did not and seemed to welcome the chance to be away from the camp as well. With his tiny group on hand, they walked through the trees, words never spoken so the wild fills the silence in between. Birds singing from tree to tree, the snap of a branch from grazing animals and the wind carrying it’s passengers of smells and sounds. Here the foliage was much thicker, dirt paths treaded a thousand times twisted deeper in. There were plenty of herbs to be found as well, picking a few up quietly as they traveled along. One particular plant caught his eye however, crouching down to gently trace a gloved finger over the stem. White petals fanned out, curling down and splotches of red made a gradient to the center. Something familiar tugged at his mind when the gentle fragrance hit his nose...had he seen this flower before?

“Andraste’s grace...I don’t know if you have another name for it but that’s what humans call it. I’ve seen mages in the circle use it for it’s fragrance…”, Sibylle had joined him, standing at his side, “You looked confused by it.”

“I couldn’t remember what it was called”, snipping a few gently by the stem, he puts them in his pack, finally realising where he’d heard about them. That name had spilled from Leliana’s lips one evening as they sat together, the red-head speaking of her past in Orlais and her mother.

“Strangely, the only thing I really remember of mother was her scent, she’d keep dried flowers in her closet amongst her clothes”, blue eyes turned towards the darkened sky, tracing the stars, “ small white Ferelden wildflowers with a sweet fragrance. Mother called them Andraste’s grace, they were very rare in Orlais.” Her smile is soft but sad, nostalgic of a life she could no longer return to. There were few happy stories in this group but some bore the marks far better than others...or at least pretended to be. Alistair had been right though, when Leliana felt she was alone, you could see the sadness seep into her face. So fragile, like beautiful glass that was on the precipice of shattering with the right touch. Yet she kept her words and smile light, watched his back around every turn...she believed so strongly in them...in him. It’d be nice if these flowers could give her the genuine smile she truly needed.

Steps carried them past the small stream, keeping close to the water’s edge with their exploration. Hidden in one of the knolls was a small hunters’ camp, embers still hot upon the wood and bedrolls neatly laid out nearby. Something wasn’t right though, he hadn’t seen any other signs of hunters around this area and surely if they had spotted them before he did they would have made themselves known to another Dalish. Unless this was a camp of bandits. Sten poked around the tent as he shifted through the packs, looking for clues on whoever was staying here. If werewolves were rampaging here then it would do well to warn them or maybe after a nap.

Wait, nap? Why did he think of that? Scratching the back of his head he looked around the small fire, checking one of the bedrolls but it was cold to the touch. Someone had been here but not sleeping...which seemed so foolish seeing as these rolls looked rather comfortable. Maybe he could rest his weary eyes just for a moment, they have been traveling so long and fighting so much. Sten seemed to join him around the fire as well, sitting on the grass with a heavy thud.

“Don’t sleep!”, Sibylle’s voice rang out to him but it sounded so distant, almost like a dream as eyes felt pulled down, “Something is not right here!” She was right but the weariness in his bones gave him little pause to care and soon he found himself drifting into the darkness of sleep. What felt like hours was probably no more than a few minutes as he was awakened with violent shaking, her voice calling him back from the edges of slumber. Except this time she is disheveled, anger visible upon her brow and robes stained. Blinking the remnants of sleep from his eyes he sits up to see the charred remains of demons...along with bones stripped clean of their identity laying amongst the rolls. 

“W-what is…”

“They put you to sleep and kill you”, her tone was a little strained as she proceeded to wake Sten up as well, “who knows how long they’ve been doing this. Judging by the piles of bones, probably for a bit.” 

“How did you---”

“Mage.”, It was the only answer she gave and honestly the only answer she needed to give. Mages were much more equipped to handle demons and spirits alike; having to battle through the Fade gave him some idea of the horrors they have to face. Which meant these poor souls were probably hunters or bandits caught in the sweetened trap laid out for them. Cold sweat goes down his back, had Sibylle not been here with them they would have been dead. Earlier conversation of her scolding him about going alone rang between his ears, the Keeper’s warning about dangers other than werewolves. Here he thought maybe it was darkspawn or something else he could put an arrow through...never did he think monsters to be smart enough to lay out traps of this nature. 

“This land is cursed”, Sten spat out, eager to leave their almost grave but Hue stayed for a moment. Silent prayer on his lips for the souls that had fallen here but also to search through the stuff left behind. Any equipment that could help them should not be overlooked but what he found, in his mind, had been so much better. Dalish in make, he held the leather gloves between his hands, thumb lightly tracing over the curving embroidery. Memories flooded his mind again, this time of Zevran joining him as he hunted for food one afternoon though he let Hue do the actual hunting.

“Not even going to try?”

“I prefer to watch you work”, a soft chuckle floated from the Antivan as Hue rolled his eyes, keeping his body to the trees so as not to alert any potential prey. They had become closer since their, well, relations and he could feel the other elf warming up to him...but there was still a wall. It was in the little things, like how Zevran still played off any deeper questions or refused to be held while sleeping. Giving enough to show interest but demanding an exit by his actions, almost like a scared animal one is trying to gain the trust of. It probably was simply that, born from a life where one always had to be on guard but the more affection that floods his heart, the harder he feels himself pushing against that wall. Maybe he was foolish and it would never come down...still, his stubbornness refused to give up.

“Actually I’ve been meaning to ask you”, his voice carried gently in the air, keeping it low so it did not stir the peace, “ I haven’t heard what you think of the Dalish.”

“Oh? Seeking my expert opinion?”

“You’re from the city, we have an idea of what city elves and humans say about us”, Zevran crosses his arms, leaning back against the adjacent tree, “ Not all of us are the bandits or monsters we’re made out to be.”

“True. Some of you are strapping wardens taking Crows like me captive”, another eye roll but that only ever makes Zevran laugh, “ I know little enough of the Dalish other than the fact that my mother was one. Or so I was told.” That made Hue look at him, surprise clear on his face.

“Your mother was dalish?”

“She had fallen in love with an elven woodcutter and accompanied him back to the city, leaving her clan behind for good”, attention to the hunt was lost as Hue leaned against his tree, granting the Antivan his full attention, “ And there, of course, the woodcutter died of some filthy disease and my mother was forced into prostitution to pay off his debts. Oldest tale in the book.” The serious tension that blanketed Zevran was a stark contrast to how casually he spoke of his parents and their horrible ends. It was unnerving to say the least, it was like Zevran wanted to be upset but didn’t have the ability to and so the story comes out like one would speak about the latest gossip. Maybe Hue would just have to be upset for him…

“Zevran, that’s...that’s horrible!”

“Is it? It seemed normal enough a tale growing up, no different than the other elven boys in the whorehouse. I didn’t know my mother, either, of course. She died giving birth to me. My first victim, as it were.” His heart ached something fierce on that, overwhelmed by such a feeling of protectiveness that he no longer cared about food. Instead he went to Zevran’s side, leaning up against the same tree. Honestly he’s not sure what being closer would even do but feeling the tension drop from the shoulder pressed up against his, he knew he made the right choice.

“It’s not your fault, you know…” A noncommittal hum was his only response, sorrowful words spilling from the Antivan’s mouth now. A crack had formed in the wall, a crack that normally Zevran would try to fix as quickly as he could. Not now though.

“We were all raised communally by the whores. It was a happy enough existence, ignoring the occasional beating, until eventually I was sold to the Crows. I brought a good price, so I hear.”

“I’m so sorry for you.” Emotions leaked into the edges of his words and he’s not sure which were stronger; sadness for a hurt child, pity for the adult he became, or anger at the ones who did this to him. Slipping a gloved hand into the other’s, he felt Zevran flinch from his touch like he’d been burned. A simple action stung his heart, rejection hurt worse than the arrows that have pierced his flesh. He should move away if the other feels uncomfortable, thinking to return back to the other tree but his wrist is caught. It was a fragile touch, one Hue could break by simply stepping forward yet it felt like steel, coaxing him to stay put. Hand holding was abandoned but the space between their shoulders was gone, pressed up against the other.

“T-that’s very kind of you to say, but it is not necessary.”, his voice was softer now, resigned in a way but no longer did it seem so flippant, “ It could have been much worse. Shall I tell you about what happened to the other whorehouse boys who did not fetch a decent price with the Crows?”

“I fear that would be something else to bring me nightmares and I already have an Archdemon for that”, a chuckle was granted for that.

“Surely your life has not been so idyllic?”, Crimson met amber as they finally looked at each other, “ People like you and I are not the product of happy lives of contentment, after all.”

“My life has been far from perfect but it could have been worse. I do find myself lucky that I had people to care for me.” Another hum, Zevran’s gaze was firmly on him but it was definitely not seeing him. Lost in thoughts that swirled in those eyes before coming back to reality.

“My original point is that my mother’s Dalish nature was always a point of fascination for me.”

“Oh?”

“Through all the years of my Crow training, the one thing of my mother’s that I possessed was a pair of gloves. They were of Dalish make, I knew that much, and beautiful.”, nostalgia coloured the assassin’s face as he looked towards the leaves, seeing memories play through his mind, “ I had to keep them hidden , of course, as we were not allowed such things. Eventually they were discovered, and I never saw them again.”

“That’s...cruel, why would they do something like that?”

“To dispel attachments. Crows are merely tools, my dear Warden, if we develop any sort of attachment then that means death.” He wanted to pretend he hadn’t understood the meaning behind that, why couldn’t he have been dumb about this? It’s not like he had much going on up there usually but the sentiment wasn’t lost on him. Any attachment meant death to a Crow because it would cloud their judgement. It was so sad for so many reasons he almost felt like crying.

“Has there been absolutely no joy in your life?” Cheeks tinged pink at his own words but Zevran just chuckled once more.

“Oh, there has been plenty. To tell the truth, it is because I expected nothing more. Still, even I eventually thought it would be better for me if I ran off to join the famous Dalish when one of their clans drew near Antiva City.” Brows drew down as he thought on it, Zevran had run away to the Dalish but…

“What happened?” There was a beat of silence before Zevran answered.

“Naturally the reality did not live up at all to the fantasies I had constructed as a boy, staring at those gloves…”

“What happened?” Words came out stronger, he had to know why that clan didn’t try to save a young elf from such a cruel fate.

“They did not take kindly to me and I will leave it at that.” Legs lost their strength and Hue found himself in a crouching position, sighing heavily to the dirt beneath his feet.

“I am so sorry Zevran…”

“What do you have to apologise for?”

“I...I don’t know but I feel I should? It’s hard to believe your own people being awful when you haven’t seen it first hand. I almost feel foolish at how little I know, even of other Dalish.”, anger burns in his heart, it’s not a rage but more of a need, as if avenging Zevran from Dalish who might not even be alive anymore suddenly became his priority, “ If they hadn’t been cruel to you, you wouldn’t have had to deal with the Crows.”

“True. I would not be who I am, of course, and I would not have met you.” 

“Hue!” Memories shatter as he is brought back to reality, Sibylle and Sten waiting on him nearby. Right, they were still in danger here...no need to get lost in his own thoughts. Gloves nestled into his pack, they make their way around the stream once more. In a stroke of good luck they only managed to run into a few wolves, no werewolves at least, and find one of the missing hunters alive. Helping him back to the Dalish camp they talked with a few more of the hunters before coming back to their own. 

“It’s too dangerous to scout further in...we’re just gonna have to go in blind with a bigger party and be prepared”, he sat down near the campfire, stuffing some bread into his mouth before digging through his now bursting pack. So many different things have found their way inside and now that he has a moment to breath, maybe he can finally give some of the presents he had gathered up. 

“So that’s where you’ve been all morning. Why didn’t you take me?” Hue snorted a bit, giving Alistair a rather cheeky grin.

“You’re not exactly built for stealth.”

“And Sten is?”

“You said it yourself he’s quiet.”

“I-Well, that is true, but still…”, tossing over an item to the human, he laughs as he watches Alistair fumble between catching it and not dropping his cheese, “What’s this?”

“A gift. Doesn’t it look like a little Gray Warden?” He watches the other look over the small puppet, silently until he places it on his hand.

“Alright Alistair, enough whining!”, his voice goes from nasal to deep, changing his expression with the words as the hand-puppet is moved, “Thank you Alistair, that’s excellent advice. I shall do my best.” A snort gets pulled from the elf, laughing loudly at the display.

“I mean, the puppet’s right.”

“ You two are making a ruckus yet again I see”, Before Alistair can say a word the blonde mage appears near them, gently sitting down on the blanket between them, “ What is that?”

“Oh, well, you know---”

“I got him a toy to play with so he wouldn’t be so bored”, Hue snorts again when Alistair throws him a look, red tinting the human’s cheeks as Sibylle joins in on the laughing.

“Oh? Do you get bored often then?”

“How could anyone get bored when he’s attacked on all sides even at camp?” A hand comes over painted lips, like she’s trying to hide how amused she is but seems to fail at it. Actually, this was rather interesting, he hadn’t had time to stop and actually see these two together...especially not after Alistair’s supposed confession. 

“Oh you poor, wounded man. So good with a shield yet so bad at dodging a bit of fun...well, no, you might be good at dodging that too.” Red still lingers on his cheeks but he slaps the puppet against his chest, mocking gasp on his lips as he looks to the mage.

“Such cruelty from such a beautiful woman”, he pretends to choke up, acting hurt, “ if you hear sobbing later, that’s me crying myself to sleep in my tent.”

“Just crying?” He almost doubled over laughing, grin threatening to crack his face as he looked over the two.

“Should I leave you two alone to do that?”

“No--I, well…”, Alistair clears his throat, opting to stuff cheese in his mouth instead of answering the question. Creators, how did that man manage to get a confession out?

“As much as I’d love to stay and watch this I should see everyone else”, He tosses an item over to Sibylle before making his way to the other tents, “ a gift! Probably not as good as Alistair’s though.”

“That would be hard to beat.”

“Well damn, guess I won’t be getting a kiss like him then”, Hue watches Alistair’s face grow steadily redder and he howls in laughter. He can’t believe this, after confessing his feelings and everything and the man still hasn’t kissed her! The humans watch as Hue walks away towards the rest of the group, leaving them alone as Sibylle turns over what appears to be a pretty, golden bracelet in her hands.

“So, uh...about kissing.”

“Maybe the moment has passed?”, there’s an obvious smile on her lips but it’s cat-like, making him huff from the teasing.

“Oh? Your loss, then! All the ladies go on and on about how suave I am! I don’t know how you can resist me like you do.” He obviously puffs his chest out, flexing his arms a bit and she fights the urge to snort. If there was a contest for the most humorous man she’s ever met he’d certainly win it all.

“Already replacing me with other women? My, that was fast!” A hand to her chest with a fake gasp, a very exaggerated pout on her lips as he deflates.

“No I wouldn’t! I--you’re teasing me again”, now his pouting starts as she laughs, “ Maker’s breath, you can be so mean.” 

“Mean, cruel, wretched. It’s a wonder why you like me so”, they both look at each other for a beat until laughter breaks them both down. 

The gifts had gone over well; a portrait for Sten who seemed to enjoy it. Another gem for Shale, Wine for Wynne, and more, well, alcohol for Ohgren. Each thanking Hue in their own way whether it be soft-spoken or boisterous, he was happy to see less weary smiles cross their faces. Morrigan had been utterly surprised when he had presented her with a beautiful mirror, remembering the story she told of her past. She had asked for his demands but became a bit more shy when she realised he had none, he simply was giving a gift to a friend. Leliana had been over the moon with the flowers, hugging Hue tightly with a gentle smile. He could see how important they were to her, just the scent sending wonderful memories back through her mind. Now came one of the most important ones, his heart starting to beat loudly in his chest. Nerves were beginning to take hold but he wanted to see how Zevran would react...how unguarded he’d be and that drove Hue to find him over near Wynne’s tent, on the edge of camp.

“Hey!”, popping up in Zevran's space his mischevious smile stretched ear to ear, “Mind if I join you?”

“Oh? Should we not go to your tent first?” Hue just rolled his eyes, earning a laugh from the Antivan.

“Here, got you something”, before Zevran could refuse or even blink, Hue shoved the gloves into his hands, watching the other elf look them over with furrowed brows.

“Gloves? You’re giving me gloves? What for?” The tone was almost incredulous, making Hue hesitate for a moment before pressing on.

“They’re Dalish...you know, like your mother’s”, Zevran’s head snapped up, eyes meeting his, “I thought you might like them.”

“I-I did not mean to sound ungrateful, it is just”, curiosity overtook him as he watched Zevran falter with surprise, “ Maker’s breath, you’re right. These are just like my mother’s...the leather was less thick, and it had more embroidery...but these are very close. And quite handsome.”

“It was nothing.” Lopsided grin plastered his face as he shrugged, leaning back on his heels as he rocked a bit. Zevran liked them! It was making him feel giddy but he tried not to show it.

“Still, I appreciate the fact that you even thought of me. No one has simply...given me a gift before. Thank you.” In the distant glow of the fire, orange light lit up the edges of Zevran’s profile, making him appear so much softer. A lovely shade of unguarded joy filled his face, creating such a handsome display that Hue could not help himself. Feet naturally guided him over and with hands finding their way to tanned cheeks, Hue leaned in and kissed the other. It wasn’t wild or aggressive; rather there was a softness to it not found before and he could feel Zevran lean into it. What felt like an eternity lasted only mere seconds, it was long yet never long enough but the waters were too unknown. With a barely contained smile and blush, he starts to back away from Zevran, rubbing his neck.

“I’m glad you like the gift. I...see you later tonight?” The question hung in the air, hanging from a single teether for Zevran to either grasp or ignore it. Luckily he did not have to wait long for the answer, that sly smile he’s grown to love growing wide on the Antivan’s face.

“Absolutely, my dear Warden.” With that, Hue walks off in a giddy state, blush starting to spread from his cheeks to his ears. Worries about the mission tomorrow have already left his heart, too full to the brim. Unbeknownst to him a certain elder mage had watched their interaction with a discerning eye, fearful that Hue was rushing head first into heartbreak and sorrow. His feelings show too well on his face for all to see and it worries her that such a warm-hearted young man might be giving himself to someone who will not love him back.

Eyes flitted over to Zevran only to be caught with surprise, in the gentle firelight all the smugness and hard edges had burned away, leaving a look of affection in the soft glow. Amber eyes looked fondly upon the gloves, fingers running along the stitching and embroidery with care. Lips pulled into a gentle smile, the mask all but stripped away as he thinks no one is watching. Maybe Zevran himself had not realised it but that surely was the look of a man who was falling in love. Maybe he already was and had just finally reached that conclusion.

And just maybe she had been wrong about him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is long and I debated back and forth if that was how I wanted to start it but I said screw it and went with it anyway. I wanted to get some gift dialogue out of the way before fighting starts up again.


	23. Intention

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." – Sam Keen, To Love and Be Loved

Night had a way of making one think; problems that had been left to the side unearthed once the dust of their actions had settled. Retrospection wasn’t lost on him but his usual problems in the clan had been about chores or getting scolded by the Keeper. When he’d stare up in the wood grain during a sleepless night and think of when they’d be traveling again, what would they have him do the next day, or what kind of animal would he hunt. Maybe thoughts becoming more complicated was just another sign of growing up, he certainly had more worries than what was for breakfast. The Dalish problem here, for one, was weighing on his mind and the lingering warnings of the lady in red. He wanted to trust his people wholeheartedly, who else did the Dalish have aside from themselves? 

Blind faith wouldn’t do him any good, doubt gnawing into his nerves as quietly as the breeze through darken brush. Tomorrow they would march into the woods and see the problem for himself...to fight? Maybe...possibly, what else would there be to do? Werewolves were monsters of the night whose anger bestows their curse onto their victims. Leaning against the cooled bark of a tree he looks over to the camp, only a few lingering souls around the campfire. Sleep should be his priority but his mind refuses. Well, if it won’t let him sleep then he could think of much more pleasant things.

Like Zevran’s smile earlier. Head leaned back against the bark and he sighed out, grin threatening to spread on his face. That had been the most genuine smile he had seen from the other elf and every bit of trouble had been worth it. Of course he wouldn’t tell Zevran how he got the gloves...no need to ruin it, but he’d do so again if it meant he’d get the same reaction. Tossing it about in his head was useless, he had to admit what his own heart beated for. Without much warning he had started to fall for the assassin, a notion that gave him the highest joy but also weighed him down heavily. As much as he wished to scream his feelings out loud...he was far too nervous of the rejection that might lay before him. All he knew was he had never felt this way before, almost couldn’t contain it.

“Can you not sleep?”, speak of someone and they appear, that accented lilt hit his ears before Zevran’s face came into view, coming from behind him, “Shall I help you with that?” The Antivan’s grin was matched by his own, crimson eyes lighting up with unfiltered excitement. 

“I wouldn’t refuse”, his smile was stolen by lips, back more firmly against the tree as the kiss deepened. It felt like melting, slow movements of lips on lips, of hands running over cheeks and into hair. Fingers pulled slightly in his nest of strands, making him gasp and that’s when the other attacked, tongue sliding into his mouth. Every time he tasted Zevran he ended up craving more, hands against the back of the assassin’s neck, pulling him closer in. Armor slid against one another, scrapping in the silent air of night, only drowned out by the beating of his heart so firmly in his ears. Mingling breaths heated up the skin between, given very little chance to bring air into his throat before gasps were swallowed up.

His hands moved from neck to Zevran’s waist, pulling the other man as close as their position allowed. Kissing him felt like flying, like his world had gained back some normalcy; both so exhilarating and satisfying. He’s never sure who initiates it anymore, lips always managing to find the other when given a chance. Each roll of the tongue stoked the fire in his blood and soon just kissing wasn’t enough. Fingers ached to feel skin once more, for bodies to slide against the other, to join together. He wanted, no needed, the hot moisture of moans upon their lips, the shaking of skin as they reached their high together. 

Without missing a beat he lifts the Antivan by his thighs causing arms to fly around his neck in surprise, legs tights around his waist. Kiss swollen lips stuttered out a gasp, amber eyes held a mixture of shock and lust as he flipped them, pressing the other against the tree. Arms hung loosely now on his shoulders as they resumed kissing, drinking from each other like a thirst they never knew they had. His fingers sink into the smooth flesh of Zevran’s thighs, pulling him so close almost no space was left between them. He felt how ready the other was for him, felt his own need growing more in his own trousers. If only they weren’t out in the open, if only this damn armor wasn’t in their way. Well, he’ll just have to fix that.

“Hold on”, whisper was rough against Zevran’s ear, command making tan arms cling to his body. Once secure he started marching quickly towards the closest tent; Zevran’s. The chuckle vibrated along his ear, lips pressed against the lobe as hot breath made him shiver.

“You know, everyone is going to notice us like this.”

“Don’t care.”, Zevran could only laugh at that, nipping the skin underneath Hue’s ear and almost making him stumble. Arms didn’t want to let go of his prize but sadly he had to so they could slip inside, pushing the Antivan onto the bedroll as soon as they were in. Strands of firelight peeked in from the flaps, revealing the unfilited lust in both of their expressions. Hovering over the other, he took a moment to drink in the way Zevran looked, how the barely there light made his features sharper. The way that light blonde hair fanned out along the blanket, lips slightly red with kisses upturned at corners with a knowing smirk. He was captivated all over again.

“Did you forget what to do?”, Zevran’s cheeky grin was met with a light-hearted eye roll.

“No, of course not”, Hue leaned in to deliver a quick kiss, words whispered on the other’s lips, “just...distracted a bit.”

“Oh? By what you will be doing with me?”

===============================================================================

“By how handsome you are”, the words spilled so naturally, eyes searching the other but finding only sincerity. Smirk turned softer and Hue felt a hand on the back of his neck, pulling him down to kiss once more. It was louder than words could ever be. Hands began to roam as their tongues slid against each other, working off pieces of armor one by one slowly until all they had left was their smallclothes. Taking it in, his rough hands trailed down a slender neck and across the tan expansion of chest, feeling each dip and muscle carefully. He hadn’t been able to explore the other last time so he was determined to now. As fingers traced down to the waist below his lips began their slow descent along Zevran’s throat, biting down to mark the other almost instinctively. A moan rang out, guess he liked that.

Mouth moved down slowly, following some sort of animalistic instinct he’s never experienced. Each taste of skin, each breath released above his head spurred him on. Tan skin tasted of the day’s sweat and something so richly Zevran that he wanted more of. Tongue lightly grazed along, roaming over a nipple in his path. Long fingers sunk into his hair when lips captured it, rolling the nub along his tongue. There was something heady about doing the unraveling for once, a feeling of power he’s never held in his hands. True Zevran had made him feel wonderful and he absolutely would want the other elf to make a mess of him again. Tonight, however, he was the beast, full of a hunger that burned every inch of nerve. 

He took his time traveling further, lips and tongue creating a wet trail the more south he went. Teeth grazed over the jutting hip bone, biting down for another bruise and he heard his name whispered out, hips stuttering underneath his grasp. Another bite and fingers tightened in his hair, a silent indication he was doing well. Calloused fingers pulled down small clothes, tongue lapping slowly over the erect cock presented to him. On his elbows now Zevran’s lidded eyes met with the one crimson one not hidden by hair; wildly glowing with lust in the firelight. Words seemed to linger on the Antivan’s lips but fell out as gasps, fingers now sunk into the bedroll as Hue tried to copy what had been previously done to him.

Watching his teeth, he sucked and licked over the member in his mouth, bobbing his head with infrequency. Each salty taste hitting his throat, each moan hitting his ears fascinated him. His own cock hardened, pressed against the ground but focus was pinpointed on the prize he captured in his lips. Body screamed for more, wanted more, to be inside of the other and feel every inch of him like Zevran had done to him. He thought he’d go mad when Zevran worked him over, gave him pleasure that melted the world around him but this felt like real insanity. The needs of the body crashing their waves against his affections; melting into the other and all coming to one conclusion. He needed Zevran.

“That oil stuff...where”, words flowed out as soon as the cock left his throat, hoarser than before. It seemed to take the other a moment, eyes blinking away the euphoria blanketing him so he could think. Hands quickly grabbed clothes, searching until he found the familiar bottle. Hue grabbed it, positioning himself between tan thighs that spread before him so naturally. He could see everything in this position and only now realised why Zevran had taken his time before; seeing your lover like this truly was a sight to behold. With oil now on fingers, he grabbed a thigh with his other hand, lifting it up until the Antivan was fully exposed. His need screamed to just plunge into such an inviting body but no, he had to do this right, just like Zevran had done.

“Do you wish for me to do it?”, his head snapped up to a whisper that filled the whole tent, amber eyes darkened with need regarding him. Shit, he had been thinking too hard again.

“No, I want to.”

“You sure?”

“More sure than I’ve been”, toothy grin lit up his face as he stopped Zevran’s next words cold, pushing an oil soaked finger inside. A blush coloured his face at how hot the other felt inside, almost like his finger would melt within. Muscled walls squeezed around as he sunk it to the base, beginning his exploration in earnest. He remembered how Zevran’s long fingers had felt in him, how he expertly opened Hue up with such ease. With encouragement from the other elf one finger easily became two, thrusting and stretching with an almost curious abandon as he watched Zevran’s face. Lust coloured every inch there, pupils enlarged and lost in pleasure as hips moved to meet each thrust in rhythm. Swollen cock swayed between them and he could see the head leaking, changing his movements up when Zevran told him to.

Eventually he couldn’t bar off his own need, pulling down his smallclothes with his other hand and groaning from the freedom. Fingers left the heat-slicked hole, coating his own cock with a few strokes. Patience had worn out and with a bruising grip on Zevran’s hips, he pushed himself inside, groaning loudly as the molten heat squeezed around him. Forehead laid upon the tan chest under him, breath caught in his throat as he forgot to breathe and it all felt so much. Too much, biting his lip as his body lightly shook from the pleasure. He was down to the base but felt if he moved now it’d be all over for him, focusing to prevent that from happening. Zevran had just felt so damn good.

“Are you alright?” He almost laughed at that one, the guy he just rammed his dick into asking if he was alright.

“How...can you..even talk...right now?” 

“Oh? Do you prefer me quiet then? Will you make me quiet?” That smirk lit a completely different fire in his belly; a fire of challenge. 

“No, but I’ll make you scream.” Growled out from his throat, his mouth swallowed up whatever words Zevran was going to say. His body took its cue, moving on its own as hips snapped to attention. There was no easing out here; each long, hard thrust drove him into the base and had the Antivan lifting his hips to meet him. His mouth tried to keep latched onto the other but it was impossible, hot breath rolled from his throat in pants. His movements were wild, too erratic and he could feel thighs tightening around his hips, heels digging into the small of his back. Sometimes his cock would hit the mark, other times seemingly miss it but the way Zevran’s fingers dug into his shoulder blades and that silkened voice moaned out for him fueled him. 

At some point his arms had wrapped around the small of the other’s back, pressing their sweat-soaked bodies tightly together. His face was buried in that slender neck, eyes clenched as he felt himself melt into the other. Heat filled the tent around them; heat and wet and skin sliding across the other, the slick sounds of his thrusting drowned out by Zevran’s voice. Neither tried to hide their moans, in the moment of their frantic lust he felt no shame. All that existed to him was Zevran; his voice, his air, his smell, his body, his heat. Every inch of shivering tan underneath him was a blessing to be had, to wash over in sinful ritual and he drank heavily from this cup. The edge was hurtling towards them, moans lapped across skin and his teeth latched on once more, pulling another dark mark to be displayed. 

As much as he wished to bury himself deeply, release every drop of himself into that clenching hole, he had to reluctantly pull out at Zevran’s pleading behest. Grinding down against the other, his rough hand joined the smooth one between, squeezing their cocks together with each stroke. The heads rubbed against each other until he felt himself pulse, Zevran coming along with him as the white mixed into a sticky puddle along the curves and dips of a tanned stomach. Panting lips found each other in desperate kisses as they rode the waves of their orgasms, milking each other with each rock of their hips. Rocking until they could no longer and Hue lays down on the other in lethargic bliss, not caring that the mess was squished between them. They laid like that for a few moments, breath winding down as heartbeats beat in time with the other. 

“We should get cleaned up my dear warden.” Despite the words Zevran didn’t seem to move, rather his fingers traced idly along the small of Hue’s back.

“That’d mean we have to move.” A chuckle met the smaller elf’s whine.

“And we couldn’t have that, could we”, looking up he could see Zevran grinning down at him, prompting him to actually move but only for kissing. It was slower this time, the frantic rush lost in the white or so it was thought until hardened fingertips spread tanned thighs once more. In mere moments Hue was sinking back inside, nipping along the rising pulse of the other’s neck with a wild grin.

“Why clean up when we’re gonna make a mess again?”

==============================================================================

Morning slipped itself inside of his tent, the chill drawing its invisible fingers along his exposed skin. His first instinct was to draw his blanket up, sink more into the warmth radiating along his front. The other was to awaken, to check his surroundings and be on guard once more. Often he would listen to that voice and this morning was no exception, eyes fluttering open until soft, blurry shapes came sharply into focus. Alright, he was in his tent and nothing was amiss there and the heat he was basking in came from the buried body of one warden. Curled up and facing him, the messy mop of golden hair stuck out in several places and hid the sleeping face from him. 

A soft breath passed his lips, swallowing down the chuckle that threatened to spill out. He would always wake up before Hue, training and instinct couldn’t be changed that easily. Last time he pretended to still be asleep and felt as the warden watched him, fingers tracing along his face in fascination. It was rather adorable, if he thought about it but also startling. The assassin part of him said to chalk Hue’s intrigue up to a new experience, that Hue was just a naturally curious and physical person and often did such innocent gestures. It didn’t have to be Zevran, it just so happened that it was Zevran. Another part of him that he thought had long been killed off liked this though, liked that Hue looked at him as something truly worthy of attention. 

_Like a real person. Like someone as extraordinary as Hue saw him as so much more than a tool or another warm body._

Shaking that thought from his head his hand stopped its motion, had been tracing along Hue’s face without him realising it. That’s...that’s not something he should be doing. It ached to realise that this elf before him was far too important for the likes of him, that Zevran was merely the escape from reality his poor mind needed. There was darkness in those youthful features at times, he had said so out loud in one of their conversations. That part of Hue was better reserved for someone who deserved it and with that affirmation he sat up, stretching out tired muscles. Careful not to wake the other he put on his armor, amber eyes lingering on the sleeping form until he stepped out into the sun. Honestly those lines of thought were trouble, what was he even thinking. While the sex was great the sleeping together might be more dangerous than he intially thought...however there was no way he was going to give that up. Call him greedy but he was enjoying it far too much. Despite being such a force of nature the little warden was...nice to hold.

A loud burp startled him from his thoughts, turning his attention towards the campfire where some of the other companions were already up. Surprisingly the dwarf was one of them, not sleeping in a pile of his own drunk stupor for once. Schooling his features once more he walks over to the group, grabbing a bite to eat as good mornings were exchanged.

“So, uhhh. You and the boss, huh?” The low gravel reached him from the other side of the fireside, eyes slowly turning to him as he sat down to eat.

“If by “boss” you are referring to who I think you are, you are correct.” 

“Uh, hm. Just”, there was actual hesitation in the dwarf’s voice, scratching at his beard for a moment, “Good luck with that.”

“Why thank you ever so much”, his tone drawled out sarcastically, too early after such an active night to be dealing with...whatever this was.

“You might want to...y’know. Keep it down, though.” Ah. Right, there it was. They had not been blessed with walls or rooms so it stands to reason they had all heard them. Judging by the looks he was being given it was safe to say just about every member had heard and if he’d been a more modest man maybe he’d feel guiltier about it. However he wasn’t so he just shrugged his shoulder, chewing on the fruit he had grabbed.

“I have noticed that the painted elf seeks the attention of the Gray Warden”, guess he wasn’t even immune from Shale this morning.

“He certainly does.”

“I’ve watched many such couplings during the time I spent immobile in Honnleath. Or should I say I was **forced** to watch”, the golem scoffed in annoyance, “ You do know that this usually ends in reproduction. I have seen it many times, indeed.” Laughter almost choked him up, surprised that any such notion would enter their heads. Did Shale not know about…? Ah, guess Alistair was going to do the shocked choking for him, trying not to laugh as the blush clearly spreads across the human’s cheeks.

“I doubt that would be a problem in this particular instance...but who knows? The act of creation is grand fun.”, his smirk grew wide, earning another scoff from the golem as he took another bite. 

“So you say. I have no idea how a golem is created, but I doubt I shall be creating one anytime soon.”

“Just as well, I imagine. Any lover of yours would no doubt be quickly reduced to a puddle of bruises.”

“So you see me winning the affection of another golem, do you? Most golems are slaves to whomever holds their control rod.”

“Funny, it works exactly the same way for us as well.” Alistair’s snorted out laugh was matched with Oghren’s loud laughter, breaking the earlier tension of such an awkward conversation. That should have been that but luck was not on his side this morning, Morrigan giving a loud hum as her pointed gaze pins him down.

“That is rather wily of you, Zevran…”

“What is so wily of me, oh magical temptress?”, strangely enough he was not met with an eye roll or pursed lips like usual but a much more sinister smirk, as if she had him all figured out.

“Getting into the good graces of the one who decides whether you live or die, not to mention the one who can protect you against your former comrades.” Chewing thoughtfully he stares back at her, face devoid of emotion. It wasn’t like she was far from the mark, that was the original intent of his plan and relationship with their dear warden. Now though...now that thought was tinged a bit sour and whether it was true or not, he certainly didn’t want to hear it.

“And I am supposed to believe you are here out of...a sense of patriotism, perhaps?” Firing back, she scoffed at such a notion.

“Hardly that.”

“We all have our reasons for doing what we do. Mine happen to come with a set of strong hands.”, another scoff, this time one of disgust and he hoped that would be the end of that. Really, he had hoped but she seemed intent on needling him for once.

“You think you can truly make him happy, hmm?”

“Did you not hear us last night?”

“I heard your caterwauling far too well for my liking but that is not the answer to my question.”

“Are you jealous, my dear? Lacking in the attention a beauty such as yourself truly deserves?”

“You are infuriating and I do not understand how he puts up with you so. Truly whatever...techniques you claim to have cannot outweigh the headaches you cause.”

“I believe that is his business, no?”, it came out harder than he intended to and before more questions could be thrown at him he had already gotten up and walked off. Washing his face seemed like the best option right now, irritation crawling up under his skin. A timely escape was called for least his emotions seep out. Did she not think he didn’t already know he was just for distraction? That her pointless accusations were not needed and what of it, whatever happened was done purely at Hue’s consent. Was it worry for the smaller elf that drove her harsh words or was it jealousy that Hue’s attention in that manner was solely on him? That...was something he didn’t want to think about right now.

“Zevran?”, he wanted to let out a groan, eyes turning to stare at the larger Gray Warden who seemed to follow him, “I need to ask something.”

“Was today marked as “question Zevran” day? I must have missed the note.” Alistair at least looked a little apologetic but didn’t seem intent on leaving so he just waved for the human to continue.

“What are your intentions with him?” The human looked so serious, almost like a stern father that Zevran actually laughed, waving his hand towards his tent.

“You speak of him as if he’s not around. He’s just right over there, you know...you could ask him.”

“Don’t dodge the question. I’m serious.”

“Mmm. Do I detect a bit of jealousy there? Feeling territorial, are we?”, the grin snaked its way on his face as he watched Alistair groan, running a hand over his face, “I thought you had designs on a certain blonde mage in our group.”

“I am just asking what your intentions are. You did try to kill us all, remember?”

“And now I owe him a blood debt, as he has spared my life. It has brought us...closer together.”

“I-is that a smirk? Are you smirking at me?” He absolutely was smirking at the human but held up his hands in surrender.

“I assure you, ser, that I am not smirking. No smirking here, no.”

“Just…”, seriousness still sat hard on the human’s face but there was also something a bit more foreign to Zevran settled there...worry for someone else, “ Listen, I’m not over here to lecture you like some overbearing mother protecting their child’s virtue. Not that there’s _much_ virtue left to defend after hearing what we’ve heard last night but that is Hue’s choice. I just wanted to know what your intentions with him were because...well, because he is my best friend and I don’t want to see him hurt.” Now this gave him pause...there was a lot of sincerity in that look, in those words and it was all for someone else. It seemed, at least, that even though Alistair might not approve he was going to respect his fellow Gray Warden’s choices. Words seemed to fail him on this part, thinking on what intent there was was like trekking through thick mud. It was no longer an easy answer to give.

“My intent is to give him what he wants and what he needs and all by his choice.” It was more vague than the Fade itself but that was the best he could offer up. At least he was being honest.

“Weird answer but okay.”, eyebrow was arched in confusion but he seemed to let the matter settle thankfully, “ Hue trusts you so I suppose that’s that.” Now that was interesting to hear, did Hue honestly trust him so much? Well...yes, if he thinks about it, the elven warden did seem to hold a lot of trust for him. How many times has Hue fell deeply asleep next to him with no fear that Zevran might kill him in his sleep? That was definitely a clear sign of trust.

“What’s what?”, Alistair startles as the familiar gritty voice greets them, Hue scratching his head wearing nothing but his trousers, “Why are you two being so serious over here? What’s wrong?” Sleep still seemed to have ahold of the younger elf, eyes barely open as he regarded them with a yawn. Ah, even in such a disheveled state Hue was quite a handsome sight to look at.

“It seems Alistair did not enjoy our performance last night though I thought it was spectacular.”

“Well, you two were quite loud. Maybe the screaming kept the darkspawn away, not wanting to walk in on such an awkward situation. Like, “oh, terribly sorry, please continue what you’re doing, we’ll shamble our way here another time.”.”

“No one was stopping you from making your own noise instead of listening in on ours”, Alistair’s face scrunched in confusion at the remark, Zevran smirking on how easy it is to watch his thoughts play out. 

“He hasn’t even kissed her yet…”, Hue yawned out, blinking the sleep from his eyes.

“Hue!” Betrayal crossed Alistair’s face, consumed by the red that almost went straight up to his hairline.

“Wait…”, another blink from the smaller elf before his eyes shot open, “Everyone heard us?!” Between two blushing Gray Wardens Zevran finally let loose a laugh, caught between his own mirth and having to talk his embarrassed, rambling warden down.

Her words rang through his mind as he stared ahead, three massive werewolves standing upon their hindlegs in front of the waterfall. They were waiting, watching, to see what he would do and he could feel his own group tensed up behind him. Hands were on weapons, spells on lips ready to cast and yet...he chose not to attack. Indeed they looked like they wished to talk instead. Having entered in the forest they had been set upon by wolf and werewolf alike, fighting through the packs as they pushed deeper in. Maybe they were tired of losing their brethren and came to speak, to find a different solution.

_You’ll know what to question when you see it._

He thinks now is the time to do that, to dispel this feeling of doubt. Holding his hand up to keep his group at bay he walked towards the werewolves slowly. All three were massive, tall upon their powerful hind legs. Bodies were built of pure muscle and fur, muzzles twisted and scarred with battles and eyes as dark as night set into their canine faces. Claws adorned their massive hands...some already caked red with dried blood. From elf or prey? He didn’t know but these massive beasts could spell trouble for him at the slightest offense. While the two in the back sported much more grayish coats the one in front had golden fur adorn his body, marks like claw marks swiped over his left eye. Eyes that were piercing, pinned to his every move like the predators they took after.

“The watch-wolves have spoken truly, my brothers and sisters”, words sounded forced, mixed with guttural growls as the leader looked down on him, “ Another of the Dalish, come to put us in our place, come to make us pay for our attack.”

“That’s not why I’m here”, a bit of a lie, that is originally why he was there but they didn’t have to know that.

“We do not care why you are here. You intrude in our forest and you are not welcome, elf.”, if this was their forest then...were they just protecting their home then, “ You speak to Swiftrunner. I lead my cursed brothers and sisters. Turn back now, go back to the Dalish and tell them that you have failed. Tell them we will gladly watch them suffer the same curse we have suffered for too long. We will watch them pay!” Make them pay?

“I’d like it if we could talk, I mean you no harm.” 

“Was it not Zathrian who sent you? He wishes only our destruction, never to talk!” This seemed...a bit odd. As a Keeper Zathrian would clearly want to choose the best choice to keep as much of his clan out of harm’s way and with these werewolves being intelligent creatures, it seemed better to talk with them. Like Hue was doing now but they speak of the man as if he was their mortal enemy. There was no denying that these werewolf were aggressive and maybe Zathrian had already tried to speak with them. Fighting seemed to be what they wanted but if Hue could manage this...maybe nobody really had to die.

“You talk of Zathrian as if you know him…”

“We have never met, he and I. He would not survive the experience, I swear it.”

“Why, though? What did he do? Why do you hate him so much?”

“You know nothing, do you? Nothing of us and even less of those you serve. You are a fool, and we are done talking. Run from the forest while you can. Run to the Dalish, and tell them they are doomed.” Hunched over, the leader snarled at him with his row of yellowed, sharp teeth, claws at the ready but Hue just stared him down.

“I don’t want to fight you.”

“I do not wish to fight you, either, but we cannot trust you”, that seemed to make him back up though, going back to his earlier stance, “ Come, brothers and sisters, let us retreat. The forest has eyes of its own, and it will deal with intruders as it always has.”

“Wait!”, Hue’s shout fell on deaf ears, the werewolves sprinting off into the forest ahead, disappearing within the trees. Fast...too fast, Hue maybe could follow their trail with some speed but the rest of his party would fall behind. Too dangerous, especially if they feel like Hue has become a threat to them. Follow they must though, that was the only way they were going to solve this mess. Why were they so intent on Zathrian though? If it were simply a grudge against the Dalish they wouldn’t have singled someone out. Maybe there truly was more to this than simply a monster attack and considering these creatures let them go so easily, maybe it was worth investigating for both sides. After all, if they had truly been mindless monsters like the darkspawn then no conversation would have been had in the first place.

“What’s the plan?” Alistair interrupted his thoughts, eyes firmly on Hue for their next orders.

“We trail them, wherever they ran off to is probably their den. I think we’ll find our answers there.” 

“Do you think it’s wise to try to reason with them?”

“I think...it’s a better idea than just killing everything in sight. I have a feeling we should hear them out.”

“Alright, I suppose your gut feelings haven’t been wrong so far. Dangerous, but not really wrong.” With a nod the party formed up once more, taking Hue’s lead as they slowly traveled further in. Eyes watched their every move, unaware that they’d meet so much more than just werewolves in the heart of this forest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, sex scene is marked off so it can be skipped if you want! I felt like we needed some more romance and light-heartedness because oh boy, here comes the dungeon. Hue's kind of already figured his side out so now Zevran gets to flip flop around and we have the companions being a little nosy.


	24. Heart's tides turn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "When my tears had subsided I realized that I hadn't been afraid of losing you. I was afraid of losing who I was when I was with you." - Unknown

Nature often has its own songs; from the chirping of songbirds to the various noises of wildlife to the rustling of the flower and foliage around. It flows gently on the breeze, creating beats that can align with one’s heart. Hunters often breathe to these tunes, disappear in the sounds of the great forest in order to stalk their prey. A traveler could learn many things if one only stopped for a moment and listened. It is the heart, the very spirit that clings to every leaf and feeds every mouth. Calming and beautiful but dangerous in its whispering voice. Yes, one would akin it to a whisper softly spoken in one’s ears.

_Not the damn trees screaming at you!_

His arrow hits the bark hard, splintering pieces and making this monster tree shriek in what only could be described as pain. Are they feeling pain? Can he even kill a tree with arrows? Damned if he isn’t trying though, another notched into his bow and ready to fire. These demonic trees had uprooted themselves as soon as they came near; bloody thirsty shrieks rattling through the hollow bark. Spirits took on many forms, he was told, as well as demons but never did he think of branches swatting at them like gangly arms. Roots being summoned from under earth to tangle them up, holding some of his companions down in vine-like bonds. Sten’s greatsword managed to slash into one of them, taking out chunks of wood before a vine caught his arm. Leliana and him faced the same problem with arrows; around him Zevran, Alistair, Ohgren, and Ruffles were caught up in the vines. Morrigan and Wynne were holding their own, blasting the swinging branches back with magic.

“Enough already!”, the scream almost echoed, not able to turn to the source before he heard a roar of magic. The air suddenly grew hot, crackling with intense fury as a swirling pillar of flames shot from the ground. It tore and ravaged the trees caught in its wake, raging with a beastial roar. Wood cracked and burned, dying screams drowned out in the sea of blaze and the searing wind dried out the grass, leaving charred ashes in its wake. It lasted only a minute before it all died out, flames extinguished like they had never been there and his mouth hung open, parched within the newly dried air. Vines, now devoid of masters, went limp, releasing his trapped companions as his eyes drifted to the mage responsible for the inferno.

“Damn, glad you’re on our side”, Hue chuckled, watching her blow some of her hair from her face.

“Nothing like a good fire to solve all our problems”, He laughed again, a bit more nervously at that. Shit, she actually meant that didn’t she? Judging by the wicked smile on her face he guessed this probably was not the first time she had solved a problem this way nor would it be the last. However any further questions were interrupted by a deep and loud groan, a much larger tree shaking the stiffness from its branches a few feet in front of them.

“Hrrrm...what manner of beast be thee that comes before this elder tree?” It rises from it’s hunched position, trunks shaped like legs to branches molding into a bark-covered spine, creating a set of ribs. Leaves rustled around it’s head and arms, bark gnarled and twisted to create an elderly but scary looking face. It stands as tall as a human building, looking down on them with hollowed eyes and long, thin like claws make up its large hands. This monster would have no problem grabbing Hue and tossing him around if it managed. Except...this one was speaking, questioning him instead of attacking.

“Can’t you see? I’m an elf!”

“Ahhh, yes, I remember thee. Long ago, the elves roamed free, their numbers few and passing fast until one eve we saw their last.”, the voice was deep, shaking the air around them and rattling through the wooden ribs, as if it took effort to speak, “ Allow me a moment to welcome thee. I am called the Grand Oak, sometimes the Elder Tree. And unless thou thinkst it far too soon, might I ask of thee a boon?” Well, this was new. Honestly he’s never really run into something like this before, an old man of a tree and he needs help? Hue thinks that’s what he’s asking but honestly the rhyming was a bit distracting.

“Uh, why do you speak in rhymes?” As far as he knows that isn’t some weird spirit thing, right? He hasn’t heard anything else do that.

“I do not know. Why dost thou not? Thine words seem plain, a mundane lot. Perhaps a poet’s soul’s in me… Does that make me a poet tree?” The tree shakes with laughter, rustling its leaves at its own joke. Okay, wait, that was a pretty good one and he ended up laughing along as well, despite the groans from some of his companions.

“Hah! Poet tree, that’s a good one.”, Alistair chuckled beside him, “I guess we can assume his bark is worse than his bite?”

“Stop.” Morrigan grounded out but that only made the Wardens snicker more.

“It was but a simple jest, a jibe to entertain my guest."

“So what are you?” Now that danger felt so far away, Hue became more relaxed, looking right up at the tree in front of him.

“I am an elder oak and nothing more, though once I dreamt of a time before, when I roamed the world and howled with pain, not of this world but twixt and twain. Perhaps a spirit then? A wandering thing drawn to this glen? But then that spirit joined with a tree, since then, a tree is all I be.”

“Yea but so were the other ones except they kept attacking us.”

“There are many just as I, but mad they are I shall not lie. A spirit trapped within a tree, no mouth to scream or eyes to see. A cage of bark, a prison wood, a thing of rage where nature stood. So twisted Sylvan they become, but I am not the same as some. I accept my fated oaken home, I feel no need to rage and roam.”

“Wait, so...spirits accidently get trapped in the trees and then go mad because they can’t get out and go on a rampage?”, Hue blinks, scratching his cheek as he looks around, “That’s kind of sad...can’t they just float back out?”

“Once a spirit possesses something or someone it is not a simple task to become free, usually the host must die for that to happen”, Wynne speaks up, his brow drawing down into pity at her explanation. Damn, so possession is horrible for both the host and the spirit, no wonder they all fly off into a rage. He’d probably go crazy himself if he was stuck inside a tree for who knows how long.

“You wanted something from us?” Turning his attention back to the Elder Oak, he watched the leaves shake once more as their head turned slightly.

“I have but one desire, to solve a matter very dire; as I slept one early morn, a thief did come and steal an acorn.”

“And you want this acorn back?”

“All I have is my being, my seed.”, Hue had to stifle a laugh, “ Without it I am alone indeed. I cannot go and seek it out; yet I shall die if left without.” Wait, that wasn’t anything to laugh about. Trees grow from seeds so if they don’t get it back they’ll die without making a new one of them. Well, it’s just an acorn, he can find something like that and with any luck the thief wasn’t far off.

“Alright, I’ll try to find it if I can.”

“Go to the east to find this man. I shall await, do what thou can.”

“Wait, he’s still in the forest?” That question was left unanswered as the tree resumed its normal state, going dormant once more. His companions looked thoughtful, probably wondering if they should even bother when Morrigan spoke up.

“I believe we should try to find this Elder tree’s acorn, surely if we succeed in this task this one can command the forest to be a little more amicable to us.”

“Oh, I didn’t think of that!”

“I had a hunch.” Sticking out his tongue he was met with a smirk from her, smiling back as he turned towards the rest of the group.

“Well, I guess we go east then, that’s further into the woods anyway.”

“P-please...help...listen… I am not...the mindless beast I appear to be…”, he stops his arrow from flying as soon as he hears the pained, growling voice. Werewolves laid around them, dead after trying to attack them, but this one looks at him with pleading eyes, hunched over in anguish. Suddenly he is reminded that this is a curse, these are not darkspawn or demons, crawled out from the darkness.

“What happened to you?” Lowering his bow, he steps a bit closer so that he can hear their words.

“They...I am cursed, turned into this creature. The curse, it...it burns in me!”, they growl in pain, words pushed out with effort, “I...fled into the forest. The werewolves, they...took me in. But I had to return. I had to! You are...Dalish? I am, as well. Or I was, until my...change. Please, tell me, have you seen my clan?” His heart jerks at the sight before him, so it was true, the curse changes ordinary people into monsters. They didn’t want this, to be this, and they suffer for it though that still doesn’t explain why they were attacking the elves. Kneeling down he looks them in the eyes, staying level with them.

“Yes, your Keeper asked me to come here.” He speaks to them as if they are a wounded brethren, though in his mind that is what they are now.

“The keeper sent you? Then...you seek Witherfang.”

“I do. Have you seen them?”

“I have, but...it is not what you think.”, he blinks, the words from the red elf flooding his ears again, “But...there is no time to explain. You must listen… My name is Danyla. My husband...he is called Athras. Please, you must...bring him a message.”

“There is death in her eyes. It will not be long, now.” Sten’s words were quiet and solemn, everyone looking upon the sight with certain amounts of pity. Probably none more than Hue though, who felt his heart ache for this poor woman...and for the husband that she was cruelly torn from.

“The scarf I wear...bring it to him. Tell him I love him. Tell him...I am dead and with the gods. I beg you…” Her voice is clogged with tears, of a despair that shakes him to his core once again. How can the Creators keep allowing this? How can the world be so cruel as to make good people suffer so tragically? This isn’t some tale told by the fireside or written about, this is life and life shouldn’t be this unfair! 

“There has to be a way to undo this!”, his eyes start to ache with unspilled angry tears, grasping her large, clawed hand in his, “I’ve talked to your husband, he worries for you. If we can fix this...maybe we can fix this and you can go back!” She shakes her head, breath rattling from her rows of teeth as she struggles to speak.

“I want him to be at peace… He is a good man. Please do not...let him suffer thinking of me.”, jerking her hand away she clutches her chest, screaming in agony, “Ah, the pain! The curse...is fire in my blood! Please! End it for me! End it quickly!” His head slowly shakes in disbelief.

“There has to be some way to heal you!”

“Do not let it take my mind! Please! I wish to die still knowing who I am!” His hand shakes but he cannot deny her wish, if he was in the same position he would want to die with his mind still intact too. To not become a monster like the corpses littered about them. Slowly he draws his hunting knife, stuttering breath slipping past his lips as he approaches her. It is quick, plunging the knife directly into her heart with a sickening, squelching noise. Blood splatters on him, gushes from the wound as she falls back to the ground, him following to keep the knife sunk in. The light is fading from her eyes but she stares into his, he swears he can see a peaceful smile as her last words gurgle out.

“Gods...bless you…” With a rasping breath escaping her lungs, her eyes shut, body going limp under him as the life fades from her. His forehead is against the pommel, silent tears running down his nose and dripping to the blood-caked fur beneath him. He prays for her spirit, prays that she finds her peace she deserves in the beyond, that Falon’Din guides her well. Then he swears to avenge her, to put an end to this curse that has stolen the lives of all those under its wicked rule. Anger blazes over the sadness that shook his core, a fire coming to life in his eyes as he slowly stands up, pulling the knife from her chest and flicking the blood away before returning it.

“Hue...sometimes-” He stops Wynne with a shake of his head, crimson eyes steady with resolve as he looks over everyone.

“I’m sorry Wynne but nothing you say right now can make this better. Let’s just find Witherfang and put an end to this curse.”

“Are you or are you not the thief who took the Grand Oak’s acorn?” Sibylle’s voice was on the verge of annoyance, painted nails rubbing her forehead. Originally Hue had been the one to start questioning this old mage but after a bit of verbal run-around he had almost opted to punch the man out before the others stepped in. Now he was back in the group, standing close to Zevran as he looked around the makeshift camp. It was dirty and worn, like he had lived here for a while and the state of the camp matched his clothes as well. Fraying threads on a thin-worn yellow tunic, held with a simple belt that looked aged. He was dirty, smelled of his own stench and the forest around with disheveled gray hair that reached the back of his neck and a beard left unattended for a while.

“Mayhap I did and mayhap I didn’t! Have you come to claim it back? Oh, what fun! But we are getting ahead of ourselves already.” Oh for the love of, why did everything magical in this forest speak like this? Time was eluding them, more Dalish could die or turn and all they had to do was get an acorn to move on, yet this human wanted to be the most infuriating thing stationed in these woods. 

“Get ahead of ourselves how?” Alistair answered in turn now, arms crossed in a manner which spoke of how done he was of this too.

“Ask a question and you’ll get a question, but give an answer and you’ll receive the same! Oh, I do so love to trade!”

“You...want us to just ask you a question?”

“Wouldn’t I have to ask you a question first?”

“Isn’t that a question?”

“Would you know a question if it was asked?”

“Are you mocking me?”

“ _Andraste’s tits!_ Stop answering every question with a damn question!” Sibylle finally spoke up, glaring with a look that would make lesser men cry, Alistair looking at her with a bit of awe. Or fear? Or lust, ah, tease him about that later. However their opponent was either far too strong or far too mad to even acknowledge her looks, speaking to her like everything should be obvious.

“But those are the rules! A question for a question, an answer for an answer! Were you not listening?”

“Why are we not just knocking him out…”, Hue whispered in the back, fists clenching and unclenching in their crossed position, “Clearly he’s not going to work with us.”

“This is no ordinary man. He is a mage...driven mad, perhaps, but still powerful.”, Wynne spoke softly beside him, also watching the exchange curiously, “I am sure she recognises that as well otherwise we might have had another fire on our hands already.”

“I’d prefer it if the painted mage did.” Shale grounded out, keeping to the back of the group with Sten and Ruffles.

“Will you play by the rules or not?” There was a moment he was sure Sibylle was about to explode, he could see it in her expression. Honestly he would have loved to seen her do it but Alistair stepped in, managing to read the atmosphere a little too well.

“Fair enough! Do you have the Grand Oak’s acorn?”

“I’ve already asked tha-!”

“Ahhh...suddenly it becomes clear.”, Sibylle’s hand drops as well as her expression, “ You here, that talking tree there, it all makes sense now. As a matter of fact, yes, I do have that tree’s acorn. I stole it and it was easy. Silly tree should have locked it up tighter! If you want it, you’ll have to trade me for it. And nothing from that silly tree...no leaves or branches or anything.”

“So we trade…” Hue started to look through his pack, rustling through the various things he’s picked up along their travels. 

“Do you really need so much stuff?” Zevran blinked, peeking into his bag at what probably looked like chaos.

“It’s important!”, Hue sees Zevran give him a look before blushing a bit, “I swear! Whatever, I just need to find something to trade. That’s easy.” There were some miscellaneous pieces of equipment that he had been meaning to sell, some other trinkets he’d managed to salvage piled amongst cloth and metal. A helmet? Nah, he doubts a mage, even a crazy one, would have much use for a soldier's helmet. Potions? Doubt it. There were some pieces of jewelry he’d managed to find, nobody really having any use for them; he had made plans to sell them to the next merchant they found. Possibly Bodahn if luck would have them yet a simple silver ring could be just what they need.

“But it is your turn to ask now. Ask! Ask away! I dare you!” The old man cackled, eyes looking between the two humans until Hue marches to the front, determination on his brow.

“Do you have anything to trade?”

“Let’s see… I’ll trade you an acorn, a helmet I found, or a book I finished reading years ago. Provided you have something interesting in return.”

“Good, I want to trade for that acorn.”

“Oho! And what do you have to trade for the acorn?”

“How about this silver ring I found?” Hue holds the ring up in his fingers, the old man’s eyes glued to them as he leans in, looking the simple band of metal over in extreme fascination.

“Eh? I once had a ring like that. This one’s shiny, still. Yes, I’ll take it. Give me that!” Reaching for it, Hue pulls it out of the way, palm facing out to the old man and he nods his head towards him.

“Acorn first. A trade is a trade, right?” 

“You demand of me first, you are a tricky one! Sent by **them** , no doubt!”

“I have no idea who **they** are, trade me the acorn.”

“Oh, oh, oh! Did they tell you pretend to be an innocent stranger, with a head full of fluff and nothing?”, Hue resisted the urge to turn his open palm into a fist and uppercut the man in the jaw, he was losing patience fast until the acorn was thrusted into his hand, “There! Now that’s done. What else have you got on your agenda, hmm?” With the acorn securely in this possession he felt relief wash over his shoulders, now they didn’t have to waste anymore time with this man.

“We’re going to go.”

“Oh, I see. You’re going to report to **them** now, are you? Fine. Good bye!” Without so much as another word the old man ran off to the other side of his campsite, throwing fists at some invisible enemy in the air. Well...alright then, they didn’t need to stay any longer and the rest of the group had turned to leave, already walking away when a glint of something caught his eye. Looking back towards the unassuming stump he notices a man-made hole on the side, leading to the underneath. With careful steps he approaches the broken up stump, moss covering most of its bark and peers into the hole. A tunnel, it appears it was, leading into a tiny and filthy cave with a large animal’s nest tucked in there. Did...did that old man sleep in here instead of the perfectly good tent he had? 

He had met humans that have irritated him before but this one was a source of his newly formed headache. Looking over the stump once more he sees a carved out cubby-hole within the trunk itself, filled to the brim with mud, twigs, and other debris. Something was hidden there and he glanced over to the back of the human before curiosity lifted his hand, guiding it. That is, until another hand came down to stop him, Zevran’s scent hitting him before he saw the other’s face. The assassin crouched down as well, expression focused as he also looked towards the hole.

“Hmm. No offense, but might I try? I’ve got a quick hand, after all.” Hue snorted quietly at that.

“Admit it, you just want to show off to me.”

“Ha!”, Zevran’s grin spread wide but he took up the position, readying his hand, “ Let’s see...when was the last time I slipped my hand into some dark hole? Hmmm...I remember. Long story, that.” He grunted a little, working through the twigs and mud with more grace than he should.

“Oh? You have a story for everything, it seems.”

“Yes, I do believe it was in Orzammar...a couple weeks ago, am I right?” Hue’s face lit up as he realised what Zevran was saying, resisting the urge to elbow the Antivan so he didn’t mess up. The sly grin on Zevran’s profile only made the blush go up to his ears, a harsh whisper grounded from his lips.

“Creators, shut up! Just get the thing!”

“Aaaand there we go! It was definitely trapped, but I am too awesome by far. Here’s what was inside.” Plopping the item into his open hands, Hue looks over the golden ring that they had pilfered. Nothing seemed special about it at all and to be honest, he considered putting it right back until a voice yelled at the two elves. 

“You’re a robber is what you are! **They** sent you, didn’t they? Well, I’ll show you! **They** won’t get away with this!” 

“Shit!” Being pulled to his feet, Zevran and Hue made a run for it, hopping over the log as magic licked at their backs. Demons of fire and rage sprouted from the earth, summoned into being by the man howling nonsense. Summoning demons? This close to a Dalish camp and whatever or whoever else might make its home here? They should have attacked him when they had the chance but with just the two of them, escaping seemed the better plan. Grabbing Zevran’s hand firmly he raced ahead, pulling the elf behind him through the brush and trees until they could no longer hear the guttural roars of rage. Hidden in the green and brown they could take a moment to breathe and get their surroundings, Hue training his eyes to look for any potential paths near them. Even with his survival skills being lost in strange woods with spirits about, especially if night fell, was not something he wanted to do.

It hadn’t dawned on him that he had failed to let go of Zevran’s hand until his own was squeezed, bringing his attention back to the Antivan. Following the older elf’s eyeline he spotted some smoke within the trees, the smell of a recently extinguished fire wafting to his nose. Steps, muffled by the dirt, carried him closer until both men saw another elf...a Dalish with red hair and a staff putting out a small campfire. Good, this must be someone from the clan...they’d be able to tell them where to go at least. Coming out of hiding with Zevran the other Dalish stood up quickly, tensed until he realised they were also friendly.

“Friends, turn back, please. These woods are a danger to those who do not know the paths.”

“We got separated from them, brother. Do you know the nearest one?”

“Yes, not too far from here there is a path that will lead you back towards the waterfall. Did you see the clan before entering here?”

“Yea, we came from there.”, He let out a sigh, relaxing at the confirmation that they weren’t too lost, “What’s your name?”

“My name is Aneirin. Might I know yours?” Thoughts began to move and turn in his head, the name bringing up a memory that started vague until the fog cleared. Back at their camp, on another night spent with his companions, he had spoken to Wynne of her past. Of the circle and how she regretted some of her youth; about a young elven mage who was her apprentice and how she was harsh to him, criticised him too quickly and eventually drove him out. Thought to be dead by the templars and yet here stands an elf with the same name, another play by the hand of fate.

“Hue. Uh, do you happen to know a human woman named Wynne?” It was Aneirin’s turn to look startled, then skeptical of the elf in front of him.

“Yes? I do…”

“So it is you! Wait right here, we’ll be back!” 

Once on the path it took Hue no time to track down his friends, not that they were being quiet in the least but each scent led him easily. The smell of ash and herbs, of metal and leather, of wine and stone, and so much more. Even in the dark of the deep roads he was sure he could always find them and Ruffles bounded up to him, barking happily that her master was safe and sound once more. They took a moment to reunite Wynne with her old apprentice, letting her clear the air and finally heal from old regrets before continuing back to the Elder tree. The large, rhyming oak was quite thankful for fulfilling his favour that he granted them a magic branch, able to cut through the barrier that shielded the heart of the forest from them. Inside they would find the werewolves and to his great agony, the nest which had been made inside of elven ruins.

Ruins. Why did it always have to be ruins? Especially of the elven variety, those were the last places he wanted to end up. Why couldn’t they have been inside of a large cave or just settled in the brush and trees to hide them away? Cold ran down his spine at the way roots choked out the once set stone, cracked and coloured with age. Dust kicked up under each step, the smell of decay and musk heavy in the air. It filled his lungs, like an endless sea had engulfed him and it hurt to breathe. Fear churned through his stomach, through his blood and he felt heavy again with sickness. Cracked stone that crunched underneath his boots suddenly sounded like glass, looked like glass shattered along the hallway floor. No, no, it wasn’t the same...this isn’t the same place, his mind kept screaming, you’re not the same. It’ll be fine...it had to be, he had to be fine, people were counting on him.

Despite reassuring himself his grip on the bow was tight, almost painful as each sound, each smell, and each shadow passing in the corner of his eye heightened every sense. Before in the main hall the werewolves had tried to make a stand but it was no use, the Gray Warden and their companions were too strong. Retreat became the only option and they went further in, locking the door behind them. Which meant that they had to find another way in, trailing down long hallways to the unknown. 

_The Keeper would be amazed to see this_ , his mind spoke in Tamlen’s voice. 

_Shut up_ , he thought back. Great, he was telling himself to shut up now. When will the guilt stop trying to drive him mad? To stop creeping through the taint coursing in his blood and infect him whole? Will he ever know peace or will he see shattered mirrors in his nightmares for the rest of his life? Ears perked as skeletons long sleeping on ancient ground began to rise, tattered weapons at the ready with growls that should not be resonating from bones. Arrows shattered through a few, putting monsters down and he almost heard Tamlen’s voice crying out in battle behind him, resisting the urge to look. 

_No, wake up, you have to pay attention._ Creators, Tamlen would be making fun of him with how much he was spacing out. Probably say the empty space between his ears had grown larger. A sword swings by his face and he is back, kicking the skeleton away before shooting it down. Focus, damn you, the faster they get through this, the faster they can leave. Easier said than done when hoards upon hoards of skeletons met them around almost every corner, leaving piles of shattered bones in their wake. Oh, and now there were giant spiders too, perfect! Mind began to strain, the walls of this place starting to look like the one before and it hurt him all over. Stomach churning, he clutches it quickly in one of the quieter areas, away from prying eyes until he no longer feels the need to be sick. 

Creators, why was this happening to him? He had already lost Tamlen, his clan, and now whatever life he could have had. Did they want him to lose his mind as well? Guilt and fear were becoming two sides of the same coin, dragging his feet down like he had grown roots but he kept on, kept going. It was eating him alive and he knew his friend would not want this for him, would scold him for clinging to the memory of his death instead of their life together. Sounds started to blur, his heartbeat louder than any drum he’s heard and everything started to tilt. Feels like falling, was he falling, but he never felt the ground meet him. Why was everything so loud, why did his heart rage at him?! The taint within his blood grew heavier, turning his limbs to stone and he was drowning in his own air, desperate to claw it from his throat.

A roar shook the walls around them, dust and debris falling to the ground as it vibrated through the very floor they were on. Whatever it was had managed to knock him out of his darkened trance, bringing him back to the reality he knew. Eyes looking to and fro, weapons at the ready, his companions were on high alert. There was only one way to go now...down a flight of stairs that led to a row of arches. It opened up to a vast room, so high that shadows painted the ceiling and so long he could not even see the other end through the hazy dust-filled air. The architecture was...massive and curved and weaved in many different patterns though most of the arches laid broken in pieces. Disarming the bear traps someone laid out for intruders, he only had to take a few steps towards a massive circle in the room before another roar filled it all.

If he thought it shook them a few rooms back he was sorely mistaken, the roar reverberated through his armor and down to his core. Filling his ears with a ringing sound that made him dizzy for a moment. Dropping down in front of him, as big as a wild bear, stood a dragon with its wings spread out and head reared back. It’s purplish-gray scales reflected what little light filtered from cracks in the ceiling and the sconces nearby, eyes as black as night staring him down. Long neck with spiny fronds racing down was craned back, posed in a threatening manner as hissing spilled from rows of sharp teeth. Before he could properly jump back the dragon whipped its body around with tremendous speed, slamming him in the side with its tail and sending him flying off. Body smacked the stone, scrapping and rolling as he could feel his lungs cry out for air.

“Hue!”, he can’t recall who screamed his name, almost can’t tell who is who within the mess of flames flowing from the lizard’s mouth. It crawled along the ledges, dropped down on them, swung its tail and swiped at his friends. Bruised was his body but his mind was clear, hunter instincts kicking in and he felt the adrenaline rush through every inch of skin. He was light once more and despite the pain he quickly got to his feet, a savage grin on his face as he readied his bow. This was by far the greatest beast he’s faced and he’d be damned not to fight it. What sounded like a battle cry ripped from his own mouth and he charged in, firing off arrows with blinding precision.

Death was something he was used to, often found by others at the end of his daggers. An assassin’s life could be considered a death wish in itself, though he had no actual desire to die. If it came, well, that was just fate. Or luck, he’s not sure which abstract thing commands death really. So why was his mind screaming at the thought of Hue dying? Why was the Warden less afraid of death than even a mad man? Who in their right mind charges a dragon like that?! They had won, of course, but that reckless lopsided smile sitting upon the dead lizard, caked in his own blood from head to toe made Zevran want to push the Warden right off his scaly perch. What fear makes this man freeze in mere hallways but abandons him in front of real danger? How dare he make the rest of them worry so damn much!

It had been frustrating...frightening when time slowed down, as if to make him witness every excruciating detail. He had seen people die, he had made people die, watched the daggers dragged through skin and life seep away with the blood. To watch Hue almost die sent icicles to his heart, piercing into feelings he had long thought dead. The dragon had been fast, quicker than any of them could keep up and it had been by sheer numbers and will that they had taken it down. Wynne exhausting herself healing everyone she could, Alistair’s shield trying to redirect the flames away. Tail and claws flinging them around, the wind stirred up by flapping wings bearing them to the floor. One such instance had left him unbalanced, hitting the ground with such force he groaned out. Claws were overhead; long and dark and sharper than any dagger he’s seen. Surely that would pierce through him, hopefully hit nothing vital so Wynne could heal him up straight away.

Then it happened, there was a growl that did not come from the beast and he was pushed harshly out of the way. Body rolling out until he stopped himself, head snapping up to see what force hit him. That force had been Hue himself, pushing Zevran to safety only to have those very same claws crush him to the floor, piercing into his back through the armor with a sickening sound. Pain shook the smaller man, gasping out a rattle cry as blood began to pour and while he was held down by one monstrous claw, the other swung down and swiped against his back. Crimson started to pool underneath, a cough sending more from his lips and hazy eyes barely focused on Zevran’s scared ones. Blood was everywhere...on almost every inch of armor and skin Hue owned and he couldn’t breathe, frozen to the ground as he watched in horror. They hadn’t been ready for this, they weren’t ready at all and Hue would die because of him.

A deep battle cry sounded out and Ohgren’s warhammer swung up, knocking the lizard off of Hue. It stumbled back, stunned by such a blow and another was delivered to one of its wings by Sten’s sword. Once driven away, he watched Hue’s body slump to the ground, skin starting to become pale as time began to slip by. It sped up again, he was on his feet, rushing to the other elf with an urgency he had never felt in his life. There was no time to think this over, no time to question this fear, he had to act fast. The wounds on Hue were deep, blood almost hiding them from view like a sea of red across the elf’s back. Carefully he pulled out cloth, a shirt maybe and applied pressure where he could. The scream was raw in his throat, summoning Wynne over who immediately began her healing magic. 

Within the frantic race to save Hue and the fire and claws lashing about, the dragon finally breathed its last, put down with a sword in it’s head. Immediately Alistair ran over, still out of breath from the battle but he took up Zevran’s position, applying pressure while the elf flopped back, drawing in the breath he realised he hadn’t taken so far. What felt like forever was mere minutes as the elven Warden began to cough, the wounds almost closed up but healing couldn’t take away the blood...nor his irrational fear. Hue’s arms shook as he tried to push himself up but Alistair forced him down, holding the younger elf with ease though Hue did try to struggle.

“I’m fine…” The words rattled out of cracked lips, it wheezed from a man who was anything but.

“Damn it, you are not fine!”, the human barked out, anger and worry twisted heavily on his face, “Stay still and let Wynne heal you!”

“We...can’t waste time…” Hue struggled to get up but Alistair gave no inch, pinning the squirming elf’s legs down now as well. 

“We waste more time if you stay injured.” Wynne admonished him and Hue pouted as best as he could while face down and caked in his own blood. 

“How could you charge in like that?! You’re a damn archer, stay in the back for once! I don’t understand you sometimes, is this like a game to you?! Do you enjoy making us worry?!” Alistair’s voice rose in pitch, eyes becoming moist as angry tears threatened to spill. He was afraid, he had been afraid and now it overflowed into anger, like a waterfall crashing down upon them.

“Screw you!”, the words snapped out, countering Alistair’s anger with Hue’s own, “Can I get you a ladder so you can get off my back!? Don’t treat me like I’m weak! You, of all people, can’t do that to me!”

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

“Figure it out yourself!” Alistair let out a frustrated growl, raising up and stomping off to another part of the room, probably to keep as much space as he could without leaving them. Sibylle seemed to follow after, a glance to Hue but what startled him the most was the pitying glance she gave him before trailing after the other human. Tension was heavy in the group, tight lips around some of the members as they watched Hue sit up. Even with healing and Wynne wiping away some of the blood the armor was pierced, slashed, and the wounds were still apparent. With a few whispered words the older mage left, a stern look on her face as she tended to the other members now, everyone picking places to rest. 

Now Hue sat on top of the dragon, a sad smile that didn’t reach his eyes filled his face but his eyes were distant, as if memory had taken over him again. Zevran wanted to reach out, to pull him down and scream at him, hug him, do...something. Shake him and demand why Hue thought so little of himself when he saw so much. It felt like he was slowly being consumed by his thoughts and he would surely burst if he didn’t take action. Alas, limbs stayed frozen, he couldn’t approach.

_What would have happened if you died?! Do you know how that would make everyone feel? How it would make me feel?! Why would you try to leave me behind like that?! I made an oath to protect you, you are what’s important, you don’t have to protect me! I’m nothing but a tool, why are you not using me like one!? What are you doing to me?! Don’t you ever do that again! I can’t watch that happen to you again! I’ve killed so many people, seen so many people die, why do I feel so lost at the thought of losing you?!_

So much to say, to scream, to plead and beg and question. Yet he couldn’t, he can’t because he knew as soon as any of those questions left his mouth he’d have to face the answer that came with it. And he was not ready to face that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I knew I had to add the "can I get you a ladder so you can get off my back" somewhere because that's the voice I chose for Hue and the glitch was hilarious.
> 
> So hey, how about the feeling of dread and death and loss? Those are fun, right? I feel like we're getting to the head and eventually it'll spill. Nobody's really a happy camper with Hue's recklessness and it's finally gotten to the point nobody can ignore it now.


	25. Lethallin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.” – Arnold H. Glasgow

Tension was not what they needed right now; laying so thick in the air one would have to cut it just to breathe again. Each step further into this labyrinth became more and more dangerous, spirits screaming in what could only be an old elven tongue and the undead descending on them at every turn. Old puzzles for ancient relics and armor thought to be lost to the tides of time, memories and shadows of books telling of an age long eroded. At least when it came down to it Hue and Alistair still worked together during battle and communicating with their companions, despite childishly not talking to the other. He knew it was stupid, that screaming at Alistair hadn’t been right but his own anger weighed out, refusing to even make eye contact with the other. Maybe once they were out of here they could fight or talk to settle the score.

_ Or one of you may end up dead and never speaking again.  _ Haunted thoughts were shook from his mind, looking on as the mages of the group had solved yet another puzzle. One involving a jar and some fountain, who knows, but the undead woke once more and he was back to doing what he did best. The further they went into the ruins the more intact they had seemed to stay; ceilings reaching so high the dust in the air blurred them in some of the larger rooms. Statues of warriors, swords and spears in hand, stood tall in designs he wasn’t familiar with at all. Merrill definitely would have more insight on this stuff, thinking on how she used to ramble on about the ancient ways and artifacts, sometimes losing him in the process. Now that he’s seeing it for himself he can see where her excitement comes from. 

What were the ancient elves like? What would it have been like to actually have a land, a solid place to stay and live? Did they live in these ruins or have houses like city elves do? Skills with the bow and sword as well, the Dalish seem to have their prowess for them but techniques were probably lost in the blood and fires of war ages ago. Well, that was neither here nor there, it’s not like they could bring any of it back by wishing for it. Even if they did manage to find old tomes or writings or tools or what have you, they’d never be like what they were in the past. They could simply be the best they could be now. Nodding at his own little internal kernel of wisdom he rejoins the group, heading down more stairs to another large, carved out room. 

An Arcane horror, bunch of darkspawn, a death trap of a room with a massive mob of skeletons, a water-filled tunnel to get into the next part of the ruins, and, oh, more werewolves. Fighting through all that mess had finally brought them to the place they needed to be, the nest of these cursed creatures. Honestly he just wanted to punch the dog-men in the face and be done with it but held back, his thoughts going back to the elven woman who had been cursed...begging for death. They didn’t ask for this, Hue, so wouldn’t it be better to fix the root of the problem instead of covering it up? Hah, root. His eyes followed a giant root that had broken through the stone, nestled in the corner of the room. Wait a moment…

There hadn’t been roots in any of the other rooms leading to here, only near the entrance. Those roots had been smaller and more wild; twisting with the vines along the floors and walls as nature had started to make its home there. The rest of the rooms, while cracked and broken with age, had remained very much intact and root-free. So how were roots this far down and this large? Also, why were they coming up from the floor and not the ceiling, they had to definitely be underground by now. He turned, mouth open, to say something to Alistair before he remembered they were mad at each other and turned away. Whatever, they weren’t looking for a tree anyway, it was the wolves they were after. Though he couldn’t help but keep his eyes on them as they traveled further in.

Eventually they met up with a werewolf who finally wanted to talk instead of fight, offering up a parley in order to insure no more werewolves had to die. Again, a very strange course of action for creatures that were supposed to be mindless and savage and Hue quickly agreed. There was an amount of respect for them for wanting to protect their own pack and to try a course of action that kept them alive, regardless of how much they hated the elves. 

“We’re talking now, aren’t we?”

“Not with me. I have been sent to you on behalf of the Lady. She believes that you may not be aware of everything you should be.” His head tilts slightly at this, nobody had mentioned some Lady before. He idly wonders if this is like their version of a Keeper or Chieftain. “She means you no harm, provided your willingness to parley in peace is an honest one.”

“How do I know this isn’t an ambush?”

“Hah, what would be the point? You have already proven your strength. We have no wish to anger you further.” That’s...a fair point. So they know when to stand down and when to rise up...Zathrian’s descriptions were moving farther and farther from the truth.

“If you were willing to talk, why didn’t you earlier?”

“Swiftrunner did not think it would matter. The Lady disagrees, and since you have forced your way this far, we must acquiesce to her wishes.” So she is the leader, good, at least they’ll have a chance to end this peacefully.

“Alright, let me talk to your Lady.”

“Follow me. But I warn you, if you break your promise and harm her, I will come back from the Fade itself to see you pay.” 

The large circular room was once, probably, designed to be a meeting room as well as all those gathered in its halls could easily see those standing on it’s risen circular platform. Designs that curved and shaped had only been blurred in the edges with passage but still were remarkably solid. Statues were carved into shallow archways embedded into the walls, of warriors and kings long since passed? Who knows, the only thing that caught Hue’s attention was the massively large tree right in the back of the room; bigger than any human building could dream and branches that stretched out over the large ceiling. Green leaves were in abundance, creating an inside canopy of life and fresh air that wasn’t found anywhere else in these ruins. How...how was a tree so large and healthy growing underground?! There was only one spot of natural light to be seen and definitely no source of water in this room, maybe underground where the roots could reach but that couldn’t be enough for the towering foliage. 

Even the echoing roars of all these werewolves circling them couldn’t tear his eyes away, the sinking feeling settling in his stomach once more. Of course, it wasn’t what it seemed because it might not have been what anyone thought at all. A damn tree...a spirit of nature standing right before him as she gazed upon with eyes dark and lacking pupils. Her skin was the gray of bark, roots jutting out from underneath and twisting themselves around her arms and legs. Hair, dark as ink, laid flat around her face and down to her body in long strands. She was made to look beautiful, human and unassuming with a body reflecting a woman’s...but she wasn’t anything of this world. Hairs on the back of his neck rose to attention as she spoke with a withering voice, with several as it seemed to echo within itself.

“I bid you welcome, mortal, I am the Lady of the Forest.”

“I thought you’d be another werewolf…”

“No, that I am not. If I could have revealed myself sooner, I would have…”

“Do not listen to him, Lady! He will betray you! We must attack him now!” Swiftrunner, the brown coloured werewolf with scars across his eye growled at him, teeth baring like the dog he was. Hue narrowed his eyes, flexing his hand towards his dagger in case the beast decided he would act. 

“Hush, Swiftrunner. Your urge for battle has only seen the death of the very ones you have been trying to save. Is that what you want?” Soft voice seemed to calm the beast, quite literally, and he pulled back almost as quickly. Now that had been an interesting choice of words...to save, hadn’t they been the ones to ambush the elves?

“No, my Lady. Anything but that.” 

“The time has come to speak with this outsider, to set our rage aside. I apologise on Swiftrunner’s behalf. He struggles with his nature.”

“I think we all do.”

“Truer words were never spoken. But few could claim the same as these creatures; that their very nature is a curse forced upon them.” Her body seemed to sway softly as she spoke, like she was merely a plant at the mercy of the breeze yet her soft voice commanded attention, riding the wind to everyone’s ears. “ No doubt you have questions, mortal. There are things that Zathrian has not told you.”

“Oh I definitely do. Nothing sounds right but I want to ask something first.”

“Of course.”

“Were you in my camp the other night? Out in the woods, talking to me in the shape of an elf?” Despite not being human she at least looked surprised as one, shaking her head slowly.

“I fear I do not know what you speak of. I do not leave this place as I cannot.” If it wasn’t her...then who? That question still hanging over his head he decided to ask something else.

“I get the feeling he hasn’t told me something, I take it you know?”

“It was Zathrian who created the curse that these creatures suffer, the same curse that Zathrian’s own people now suffer.” Crimson eyes widen at this information, looking to the werewolves before back at her in shock. “Centuries ago, when the Dalish first came to this land, a tribe of humans lived close to this forest. They sought to drive the Dalish away. Zathrian was a young man then. He had a son and daughter he loved greatly, and while out hunting the human tribe captured them both.” His blood felt like ice water, he had heard the tale from Zathrian’s First, how his children had suffered at the hands of malicious humans and how he had saved her from the same fate. A man filled with that much grief and rage would definitely want to kill those men...curse their names but that wouldn’t make sense, there’s no way that Zathrian is  _ that _ old.

“You’re kidding…”

“The humans...tortured the boy, killed him. The girl they raped and left for dead. The Dalish found her, but she learned later she was...with child. She...killed herself.” The growling in Swiftrunner’s voice couldn’t hide the somber and almost remorseful tone as he finished the tale, making the pit in Hue’s stomach grow much heavier. How could they...how could anyone do that and to children! The damn land was big enough, they could have shared or compromised. Why did these damn shem always have to treat them like diseased dogs?!

“Those shem deserved what they got!” The words spilled from his lips, sharp in tone and his fists clenched. 

“Indeed they did.” The agreement seemed to ease some of his rage.

“Zathrian came to this ruin and summoned a terrible spirit, binding it to the body of a great wolf. So Witherfang came to be.” Swiftrunner stood before him now, making Hue look up as the great werewolf recounted the tale. “Witherfang hunted the humans of the tribe. Many were killed, but others were cursed by his blood, becoming twisted and savage creatures…”

“Twisted and savage just as Witherfang himself is.” The Lady bowed her head before locking eyes with Hue once more. “They were driven into the forest. When the human tribe finally left for good, their cursed brethren remained, pitiful and mindless animals. I showed Swiftrunner that there was another side to his bestial nature. I soothed his rage, and his humanity emerged. And he brought others to me.”

“Then why did they ambush the Dalish? For revenge?”

“In part. We seek to end the curse. The crimes committed against Zathrian’s children were grave, but they were committed centuries ago by those who are long dead. Word was sent to Zathrian every time the landships passed this way, asking him to come, but he always ignored us. We will no longer be denied.”

“We spread the curse to his people! So he must end the curse to save them!”

“Please, mortal...you must go to him. Bring him here. If he sees these creatures, hears their plight...surely he will agree to end the curse!”

“Hold on!” His voice comes out sharper than he wanted but it seems to get him what he wants; silence and all eyes on him. “Listen, there’s no way Zathrian can be that old. Sure, ancient elves lived for a long time but we Dalish pretty much live as long as a human, how the hell can the man be hundreds of years old?”

“As he had brought the curse, he is also tied to the curse. As it remains, so does he.”

“Are...are you saying he’s immortal as long as the curse is around?” With a nod of her head rage fuels into his blood once more, only with a much different purpose. “So these werewolves now, they’re just what...immortal too?”

“Yes. However these poor creatures are not the ones who commited the deed.”

“So these aren’t even the same humans who committed the crime?! All this time Zathrian could have ended this curse instead of letting his people get attacked?! Killed!? Cursed?! And he’s letting people who aren’t even involved just live like this?!” He’s pacing now, lungs starting to feel a little hot as he shouts, trying to piece everything together but it’s so much; so much information, so much sadness, so much rage. He feels for Zathrian...about his children, he really does, but to keep punishing people who are innocent was wrong! This...this is why he was warned, had he simply killed all the werewolves he’d be killing people who were just trying to live! 

“Tell him if he refuses, I will ensure that Witherfang is never found. He will never cure his clan.” Hue wanted to tell her she could stick her ultimatum up her...whatever she had but angering immortals spirits probably wouldn’t help anyone. 

“Oh, I’ll get him to come. You can count on it.”

  
  
  
  


“Ah. And here you are already.”

“Well, isn’t this nice? You’re here waiting for me. Oh, who am I kidding, I knew you’d be here.” Hue growled out, slowly walking over to the Keeper who, very conveniently, was here for them. His other companions didn’t look very pleased either but at least it saved them a trip back to camp...not that it calmed his urge to deck him in the face. 

“Did you? Aren’t you the intuitive one.” He stood up slowly, facing Hue with arms crossed. “There was no way to tell what would happen once you reached this ruin, so I decided to come myself.”

“We need to talk--”

“Yes, yes, there will be plenty of time for that. Did you acquire the heart?” Hue was about to lurch forward, fists tight, but Leliana’s hand on his shoulder snapped him out of his rage. Right, they wouldn’t get anywhere if he lost it.

“No, I didn’t.”

“You didn’t? May I ask, then, why are you leaving the ruin?”

“The Lady won’t give you Witherfang until you break the curse.”

“Hah, you do understand that she actually is Witherfang?”

“I’m not stupid, I figured out that much.” He scoffed, crossing his arms as he glared at the Keeper.

“She is the powerful spirit of this ancient forest that I summoned long ago and bound in the body of a wolf. Her nature is that of the forest itself. Beautiful and terrible, serene and savage, maiden and beast. She is the Lady and Witherfang both, two sides of a single being.”

“So?” The shrug of his shoulders seemed to give Zathrian some pause, like he had expected Hue to be more in awe or something. He wasn’t...none of this would be happening if Zathrian had just killed the shem responsible and let it be, now his own people were suffering from the curse he was too stubborn to give up.

“The curse came first from her. Those she afflicted with it mirrored her own nature, becoming savage beasts as well as humans.”

“You are just as much responsible for it as her!” Pointing a shaky finger at Zathrian he felt himself get riled up all over again. “And the werewolves are no longer mindless beasts!”

“I find that difficult to believe.” Zathrian sneered, hands behind his back as he looked down on Hue. “They attacked my clan and they were the same savages then that they have ever been. They deserve to be wiped out and not defended.”

“See for yourself then…” There was a pause between both men, the Keeper looking Hue up and down before sighing.

“Fine, I will accompany you back to the ruin. Let us go and speak to the spirit and I will force her into Witherfang’s form. He may then be slain and the heart taken.”

“No, you’re gonna talk to them!”

“Why? You claim they have regained their minds, but they are still savage beasts. Their nature is unchanged! All they will want is revenge...or a release that I will not give them. No, let us take the heart and end it!”

“You still hate this much after all this time?!” He can’t wrap his mind around this, how someone could carry so much hate over sorrow? Did he hate the darkspawn for taking away Tamlen? Of course he did but that didn’t mean he was going to put his people or others in danger because of it! How could this old fool not see what he was doing?!

“You were not there! You did not see what...what they did to my son. To my daughter. And so many others.” Zathrian was losing his calm as well, memories breaking the veneer as sorrow and hate filled his voice. “You are Dalish! You know how we must struggle to be safe, how we must fight for justice! I could not let their crimes go unanswered!”

“I got that but that was long ago, those shem were punished! You can’t keep punishing people!”

“I remember them as if they were yesterday. Even if they are more than animals now, they desire nothing but revenge. They will never let my clan be.”

“It’s not your clan that’s the problem! Just talk to them Zathrian, this isn’t fair! This isn’t what your children would have wanted!”

“How dare you---!” The older man seems to catch himself, eyes fixed on the young face before him, red eyes firm, never wavering. “And what if it is revenge they want, and not talk? Will you safeguard me from harm?” Of all the...is the Keeper really more concerned about his own safety than finding a solution to help his people? Maybe it wasn’t just hate sustaining this man for so long but cowardice as well.

“It won’t come to that.”

“Fine, I fail to see the purpose behind this...but very well. It has been centuries now. Let us see what the spirit has to say.”

  
  
  


There had been a lot of screaming involved; mostly him, Zathrian and Swiftrunner as he’s pretty sure that spirit couldn’t scream if she tried. Neither side seemed willing to back down, pride and fear driving Zathrian’s barbs as he called his actions justice and righteous. When Hue finally had enough, that is when the Keeper attacked, the smaller trees springing to life to attack him and his companions while werewolves were paralyzed. Killing the Sylvans and beating the man into a clearer head had staved off his rage and with the Lady’s calming nature they were able to get these talks back on track. At least the screaming had subsided and eventually Zathrian admitted what he had truly feared, that hate had consumed his soul and that it was time to end it. 

Ending the curse had been a lot more simple than Hue thought it’d be, as soon as the seal was broken Zathrian had collapsed to the ground. Dead. Nothing keeping his spirit bound to this world and in a blaze of light the Lady joined soon after, disappearing into the air like flickers of flame. Magic surrounded the werewolves, turning them to human form and they cried with joy, hugging each other. Swiftrunner, who was much different in human form, thanked him profusely and said they would join up with other human villages, find their place in life. Heading back to the Dalish camp, the elves could celebrate in their now cured brethren but also mourn the passing of their Keeper who “sacrificed himself to break the curse”. Hue didn’t have it in his heart to correct them, letting them say their goodbyes to the departed and live in joy at the peace they now found themselves in. 

“You didn’t tell them?” Alistair’s voice carried over to them when the First had left them alone, an unreadable look on the human’s face.

“What would be the point? They’ve suffered enough.” A thoughtful hum was his only answer and remembering they were still supposed to be mad, they parted the group then and there.

  
  
  
  


Night was spent in the Dalish camp, insisted on by the elves so they could celebrate the warriors that had helped end the curse. It felt a little wrong knowing what they knew but it probably was good for his companions to have this rest. They’d have to stay a couple days nearby anyway as the Master was busy crafting him a bow from the ironbark they’d found. It would also be good to make sure they were stocked up, not knowing what they could run into next. Cheers and laughter erupted from near one of the campfires, watching as drink and food were passed out between the elves and his companions. Ohgren, at least, looked like he was having fun and it brought him memories of his clan. Had they made it across to the Free Marches yet? How were they faring? Drink brought to his lips to chase away his never-ending worries.

“Is this seat taken?” Without his answer Zevran plopped down right next to him, sitting on the steps of the nearby aravel as they watched on, “ I have a question, if I may?”

“If you’re going to yell at me, you’ll have to get in line.” Another sip of his drink but Zevran only seemed to softly chuckle at him, shaking his head slowly.

“Maybe later. I must admit, I am a little confused. Are Dalish clans usually this small? People speak of them in such a way I thought they’d be larger.” 

“Hardly!” Hue grinned, setting his cup down as he leaned more into Zevran’s space, shoulders touching as he pointed out into the dark treeline, “This is just one of the hunter and warrior camps, the main one is probably further in that way since the trees are more dense there. They might respect us but no Dalish would let an outsider into the main camp unless they were considered leth...ah, friends of the clan and that’s a big maybe.” 

“So there’s more than one camp?”

“Well yea, it’d be pretty silly to set everyone up in the same area. Especially with how often we can get attacked. The main camp has the children, the sick, and the elderly as well as our mages and scholars. Then we set smaller camps around with hunters and warriors, everyone travels between them. The Keeper was probably in this camp because the curse hit here but usually you’d find them in the main camp too. I’d say a good sized clan has around...uh, two hundred members.”

“That’s...a village. Ah, I can see now and I suppose with all the dangers it would make more sense to be spread out like this.” Hue looked up but Zevran wasn’t concentrating on the trees but rather the shorter man himself. “Do you miss it?”

“You’ve asked me that before.”

“Ah...so I have.” For once Zevran seemed almost unsure how to carry the conversation, his eyes fixed on Hue but there was something distant dancing in those amber orbs. “There is a reason I accepted this mission in Ferelden, far away from home, and it had nothing to do with any thought that I might leave the Crows. Meeting you, after all, was quite an accident.” The abrupt turn of conversation wasn’t unfamiliar when speaking to Zevran but usually it would turn to levity, the Antivan doing his best to avoid seriousness. Now, however, Hue was frozen by that out of place somber look and it felt like something was about to change. Anxiety started to claw at his heart, maybe he should stop the other but he couldn’t, he needed to hear whatever Zevran felt was so important.

“Are you...okay talking about it?” The corners of Zevran’s lips upturned softly.

“My last mission before this one...did not end well.” The assassin leaned more against Hue, like having the warmth of the other helped take the edge of these memories. “You must realise that until that day I was cocky and arrogant. I was the best Crow in Antiva, I believed, and I bragged of my conquests often...both as an assassin and lover.” The bragging wasn’t exactly a surprise, he told Hue plenty of stories when asked...oh.  _ When he was asked. _

“You were  _ more _ cocky and arrogant? I can’t even imagine.” A soft chuckle spilled from Zevran’s lips, shoulders losing a bit of tension as he reached up from behind and messed up Hue’s hair. 

“Indeed. I was often told I was insufferable...right before I ended up in bed with someone. Such is how it was.” Hue swatted the hand away gently, hair moved so both eyes were exposed, looking up at Zevran with curiosity. He loved the way the fire’s light softened the edges of the other’s face, making him appear more handsome than usual. Except...Zevran wasn't hiding the sadness from his face like he usually would, saturated into that weary smile he was trying to hold on to.

“What happened?” That seemed to knock the Antivan from his thoughts, eyes focusing on Hue once more as he continued.

“One of the Crow masters grew tired of my boasting. My bid for an incredibly difficult mark was accepted, much to my surprise: A wealthy merchant with many guards and completely silent. Taliesen agreed to be part of my team, as well as an elven lass named Rinna. She was...a marvel. Tough, smooth, wicked. Eyes that gleamed like justice. Everything I thought I desired.” The way his words stayed soft, how he spoke of this woman sent so many emotions to Hue’s heart that he felt the damn thing was going to fall out. Jealousy, sadness, pity; it was so much he wasn’t sure how he was even processing the ache.

“You were in love.” There was no point in Zevran answering or denying that statement, but Hue kind of wished he did. A little bit but even he wasn’t that stupid. Words tasted bitter as they spilled from his tongue, drying his throat at the realisation. 

“Rinna was special. I had closed off my heart, I thought, but she touched something within me. It frightened me.” Creators, he didn’t want to hear the rest of this but he knew he had to. This was important to Zevran, he was trusting Hue with such a guarded secret to his heart but damn if it wasn’t making him feel small. 

“Oh, I see.”

“When Taliesen revealed to me that Rinna had accepted a bribe from the merchant, told him of our plan, I readily agreed that she needed to pay the price and allowed Taliesen to kill her.” Hue’s head snapped up, eyes fully on Zevran who was looking down in his own lap, hands clasped as he pushed forward. “Rinna begged me not to. On her knees, with tears in her eyes, she told me that she loved me and had not betrayed us. I laughed in her face and said that even if it were true, I didn’t care.” Eyebrows knitted in confusion and concern as he watched Zevran’s face fill with anger, at himself, and regret. Even knowing the Antivan was an assassin, that he killed people, that he would have fully killed Hue if things had been different...Hue couldn’t imagine the other doing something so cruel. Not after the way Zevran watches out for him, when in the Deep Roads he told Hue to give the blighted dwarf mercy. 

“Zevran...that was…”

“Cruel? Heh, yes. It was.” His response was almost lost in the night air, so soft and sorrowful that it pierced into Hue’s heart. “Taliesen cut her throat and I watched her bleed as she stared up at me. I spat on her for betraying the Crows. When Taliesen and I finally assassinated the merchant we found the true source of information. Rinna had not betrayed us after all.” Elbows sat on his knees, clasped hands against his forehead as Zevran leaned over, eyes closed with an almost shaky breath. All the strength looked gone from his body, the heavy weight he had carried in his heart now out in the open.

“I’m...sorry.” Nothing more could come out, he wasn’t even sure what he could say at this point.

“I...wanted to tell the Crows what we had done, our mistake. Taliesen convinced me not to. He said it would be a foolish waste. So we reported that Rinna had died in the attempt.” A shaky scoff left his lips. “We needn’t have bothered. The Crows knew what we had done. The master who disliked me told me so to my face. He said the Crows knew...and they didn’t care. And one day my turn would come.”

“Why would he say that?”

“To rub it in my face, perhaps. That I was nothing. That she was nothing.” He finally lifted his head, eyes almost tired with guilt as he looked to Hue. “You once asked why I wanted to leave the Crows. In truth, what I wanted was to die. What better way than to throw myself at one of the fabled Gray Wardens? And then...this happened. And here I am.” There wasn’t much time for anything to be said because Hue’s body moved on its own, pulling Zevran into a tight hug. No space was left between them as he buried his face into the crook of the Antivan’s neck, holding Zevran to him as tight as he could as if to squeeze out all the sadness between them. 

“I am so sorry, Zevran.” Words felt a bit choked up in his throat but he breathed them into the other’s neck, not letting go once. “But you’re alive and I’m so happy you are. You’re not nothing, not to me! She wasn’t nothing either! They were wrong about you!” Amidst the rush of emotions Hue couldn’t fathom the weight of what he just said, all he could feel was the beating of their hearts together and the catch of Zevran’s breath. It felt like the Antivan was going to sit there in shock until Hue let go but then he felt arms pull him in too, nose up against his neck as Zevran leaned in as well. They hugged for who knows how long until Zevran pulled away just enough to face each other, smooth hands cupping the younger man’s face. Like most times, the assassin’s face was unreadable but it felt warm, made Hue blush with how much it made his heart swell.

“It...feels good to speak of it to someone. I swore I never would. Whatever it is I sought by leaving Antiva, I think I have found it. I owe you a great deal.” Emotions jittered in the elf’s veins, making him want to kiss Zevran and he tried to, except he was held back. “And I would like to keep that up provided you stay alive, my dear Warden.”

“Zevran, _ come on _ …”

“No.” The firm tone made Hue blink, forcing him to look the other in the eyes as the commotion of the camp drowned out behind them. “You are...more than something to everyone here, so you must stay alive Hue, no matter what.” He wanted to argue that he would not stay alive at the cost of Zevran, of anyone for that matter. It failed though, died right in his throat as he tried to untangle the weave of emotions in those amber eyes but coming up with nothing. Does that mean Zevran feels the same way as him or was it simply because of who Hue was? Why couldn’t anything be simple? Shyly he nodded, the red starting to fill up his cheeks again with how warm his face felt. Lips planted on his, stealing his breath away as they kissed softly. As much as he wished to hear clear words he could, at least, fill his heart with these kisses and stolen touches. 

“Take it to the tents, ya pipe-cleaners!” Ohgren’s boisterous roar of a voice carried over to them, knocking him out of his stupor as all eyes were on the two elves now. His first instinct was to stop, to back away thinking the wrong idea would cultivate amongst not just his group but the Dalish and might scare Zevran off. He needn’t worry, however, because as soon as he tried the Antivan grabbed him by the back of the neck and dove back in. Soft surprise whined from his throat, hands flailing for a moment to either push or pull yet they settled on holding onto the other, leaning more into the kiss as the cheers grew louder. 

  
  
  
  


Awkward was probably far too generous a word to use in this situation, as he sat on the log across from their little camp’s fire. Across the flickering blaze sat the other put-out party, glaring at him a bit as he tried to avoid his eyes. How the hell was he supposed to keep a lookout for danger when he was so on edge from this?! Though both Wardens had been practically forced on guard duty together since they didn’t seem to want to grow up and talk after the last two days; he can’t say he wasn’t grateful for their meddling. Maybe it had been wrong of him to scream at Alistair, though the human had screamed at him first...out of fear. Sibylle had told him they’d all been scared that Hue was going to die, that his injuries had been that bad and he was damn lucky that Wynne had been there. Knowing how it feels to lose someone close to you like that, he felt guilty he almost put his friends through the pain. 

Still, it was hard, what did Alistair expect him to do? Stay in the back and be protected? Not rush in when he had been the only one close enough to save Zevran? That was something he couldn’t do and he wished the other would understand that. Maybe it would and it hurt that they hadn’t been able to talk but it wasn’t like Alistair was breaking this silence either. Why did everything have to be so damn complicated?! Sighing out, he shook his hair, mouth open to say something...anything to the human staring holes into him until a shiver ran down his spine. It prickled and pierced along his skin, setting his blood on fire as he hunched over and held his head. Roaring echoed through his mind; vibrating in putrid green and rotting purple. It felt like fire was ignited in his chest, that it would spill forth from his throat to the ground. Hollow eyes glaring right into his soul, to consume him in the darkness.

“Did...did you feel that too?” Alistair’s shaky breath called out to him, his head looking up to see the human was also in the same state. “It was like the archdemon saw us! Saw us! W-what does that mean?”

“I don’t...I don’t know.” Breathing seemed to come back to them and both men scrambled up, readying themselves as hissing was heard over the roar of fire.

“I think---wait! Did you hear that?” Both men turned their eyes to the dark line of trees, watching as a large mob of darkspawn shambled out from it. Once their soulless eyes locked onto the wardens they began to rush, weapons pulled out as Hue screamed an alert through the camp. In mere seconds his companions were out, disheveled, but fighting with all their might to take down the hoard. Swerving through the shrieks he landed arrow after arrow into tainted flesh, putting down his fair share of darkspawn until his arrow pointed at its newest target. A target that was just standing there, wavering, decked out in almost familiar armor. Pointed ears and bloodshot eyes were still apparent, this elf hadn’t yet been turned fully but was close. Better to put an arrow in his head and let him die quickly, that was the plan until a garbled tongue forced out words.

“You...lethallin…” It was filled with more pain than just the taint, freezing Hue’s body as he almost forgot to breathe. Fear sank its claws deeply into him, piercing his lungs and heart and he could feel his body shake, feel the world start to turn and sway as his eyes opened in hollowed dread.

“T-tamlen…?” The name felt heavy, dropped from his lips like it had finally broken free. He hadn’t spoken his friend’s name since the clan, hadn’t dared utter it for the rush of sorrow that would overwhelm him. The memory of that name alone had filled his dreams with the shattering of glass, of soulless eyes blaming him, tearing him apart with the guilt. Was he even breathing right now? His heart thundering so loudly was the only thing assuring him he hadn’t died on the spot.

“Don’t...don’t come near me! Stay away!” Tamlen raised his hands up, screaming at him as Hue hadn’t even felt himself coming closer. The shock had numbed his senses, his logic and when the tainted elf turned and ran away he instantly followed, screaming after his friend. Even his companions calling out to him to come back didn’t make it to his ears nor the sound of footsteps following behind, he had only one singular goal. To catch up to Tamlen, to apologise, to beg, to do anything or everything to help him. Tamlen had been alive, he had been alive and suffering this whole damn time and Hue had done nothing to find him! There was no way he could expect his friend to forgive a worthless person like him but he couldn’t let him go, not now! The guilt rolled in his stomach like a tempest, threatening to knock him to his knees but he kept running until he finally caught up within the brush before the forest. The moonlight shined off of Tamlen’s now bald, sickening gray head as well as the parts of armor that hadn’t been dirtied and rusted. His hands stayed up, making Hue keep his distance, but he ached to hug his friend...to cure him, to make it alright again.

“Tamlen, please...let me help you…” The figure before him was starting to get blurry, when had Hue started crying? Voice was choked up in tears, heart painfully beating as he looked over his friend.

“Don’t...look at me! I am...sick…” It was like with each word Tamlen had to remember how to speak, forcing each one through a dried throat. Face contorted with strain and it broke Hue’s heart all over again.

“We can help you, lethallin. My friends are really smart! Please...come back.”

“No help. No...help for me. The song...in my head. It...calls to me. He sings to me! I can’t stop it!” Hunching over Tamlen holds his head tightly, every syllable laced with pain as he stumbles a bit. Hue tries to reach over but is screamed at, making him flinch away from his friend. 

“I’ll find a way Tamlen, just please!” Begging seems to do no good as Tamlen shakes his head fiercely.

“Don’t want...to hurt you, lethallin. Please...stop me…” Ice clenches his heart once more, the realisation causing another wave of sobs through his throat as he shakes.

“You can’t ask that of me! I can’t do it! Please!” It’s taking every ounce of will to keep him on his feet, the sheer weight of the situation bearing down on him. Guilt and sorrow tangle and weave through his veins, his own taint becoming heavy, dragging him down to the ground. To sink below, Creators know he deserves it. Why hadn’t he gone back to look for Tamlen? Why had he ever listened to Duncan?! It should have been him to die!

“You cannot help me.” That broke another sob from him. “I’m...so sorry, lethallin. Never wanted this…” His legs finally gave out, falling to his knees as he hunched over, forehead laying in the dirt that stained with his tears. Lungs heaved out sobs and he heard Tamlen approaching, heard the nasty hissing, gargled sound darkspawn do and knew that his friend’s mind was long gone. He couldn’t fight though...he deserved this and what better fitting end would there be. Of course, it wouldn’t come as he heard the tell tale sign of metal sinking into flesh. Looking up slightly through his dirty bangs he saw the dagger in Tamlen’s forehead, watched his friend’s body fall backwards into the dirt and he sank to the ground once more. 

The glass breaks once more and he’s sure he’s crying now, wailing into the dirt below as it all comes rushing out. There had been no body for the funeral, no real goodbye as he had been rushed from the clan. No mourning or tears to spill as he was rushed from one danger to another, only the guilt to crawl through his veins as he slept. Only the fear to sunder him in the ruins, making him sick with regret and pain. Now...with his friend truly dead in front of him, knowing what really happened, he finally breaks apart. Hurried steps gather around him, he feels himself pulled into arms, only knows it’s Zevran by the scent. Barely hears Wynne asking him if he’s injured, searching him over as he cries. Nobody knows what to do because nobody has even seen him in so much agony.

And there wasn’t anything anyone could do, except stand around as he clutched onto the other elf, getting some purchase in reality. What felt like hours had only been minutes but Hue felt like the world had truly ended, he felt something break in him that he knew he could no longer get back. Hope was gone, his friend who had been a constant shadow was now a ghost and he sobbed and cried and wailed. Let it all pour out from him finally. This had been his fault, this had all been his fault. He could have stopped Tamlen, could have saved him, could have searched for him. This was divine punishment, a reminder to him that he was only alive because of Tamlen’s death. That he had to carry this weight until the day he died.

“What’s your fault?” Out of all the voices around him Alistair’s question is what brought him back, lifting his aching head slowly with red-rimmed eyes. “Who..was that?” Eyes slowly moved from Alistair’s blurry, concerned face to the body laying on the ground. Suddenly...it didn’t matter anymore, the words falling from shaking lips as he kept staring at the body.

“That...should have been me.”

“Hue, please.” Leliana’s soft voice was close by, probably a hand on his shoulder like she usually did. It didn’t matter though, he didn’t deserve any of their pity and the secret that had been caged in his heart was finally let loose. Let them hate him then, he more than deserves it.

“It was my best friend...Tamlen, he was...a hunter like me. We grew up together. Some humans came too close to the camp, we scared them off but they told us of a ruin before they did. We went to explore...I wanted to see. I was so stupid.” It felt like stones were being lifted off his back, breathing was becoming a little easier now that he wasn’t sobbing. “There were...monsters in there, Tamlen said we should leave. I said we should kill them before coming to camp. It seemed fine then we found...a mirror.”

“A mirror?” Morrigan had spoken up but he didn’t even look her way, eyes frozen on the sight before him.

“Yea. I guess it, I don’t know, bewitched Tamlen. It felt wrong, I tried to pull him away but I couldn’t. He touched it and couldn’t get away. It exploded on us. I...I was the only one Duncan saved.” Hue lifted up onto his knees, eyes finally turning from the body to the ground but he felt so drained of everything, like he would simply fly away like ash in the breeze. “I tried to find him, I went back but Duncan said he wasn’t there. Duncan told me he wasn’t there and I believed him! He smashed the mirror and took me away, said I was tainted too and only the Gray Wardens could help me! I never had...I never had a choice!” Tears were starting to build up in his eyes again, his lungs shuttering as his heart raced, it felt like breathing was impossible. Voices were colliding around him, the world around him spun and everything tilted, world going black before he knew it. Some tiny voice inside him pleaded with his companions not to hate him now but he felt like that was an impossible wish.

  
  
  


Strands of daylight caressed his face, making his lashes flutter as he was blinded for a moment. Raising a heavy arm up to block it out, he felt his memory at a loss as he looked up to the ceiling of his tent. Eyes hurt, felt crusty and raw as he rubbed them with his arm. Head pounded near the front and he felt so exhausted, more than he ever had. His other arm also felt heavy for a different reason, looking over to see Zevran sleeping next to him. Astonishingly enough they both were clothed, making Hue blink through the blurriness of morning. Leaving his tent on shaky legs he quietly made his way over to the fireside, the back of the human he had yet to apologise to greeting him. Fear made him wonder if it would be a good idea to even sit with him but Alistair had looked his way, signalling the elf over with bread. Grabbing the piece, he sat next to the other and bit into it, chewing away until finally the other spoke.

“It wasn’t your fault, you know.” That halted his chewing, memories of last night rushing into his head and he almost dropped his food as the pain blossomed again.

“I could have looked for him harder…”

“Maybe or maybe you could have and ended up like that too.” He was about to tell Alistair that he would have deserved it anyway before the human sighed. “It feels wrong of me to think I’m happy that Duncan found you...that Duncan made you into a Gray Warden. I know you’d have rather lived with your clan, grew up and never known any of this. Maybe it’s selfish to say that I’m happy you were stuck with me, that it’s been you with me this whole time. I always wondered why you never talked about yourself or your past, I thought maybe it’s because you didn’t trust us. Now I see it’s because you were afraid and regretted being here.”

“I don’t!” He coughed, yelling scratching up his already hurt throat. “I don’t regret being here with you Alistair. I don’t regret being here with any of you! You made things...easier but I didn’t know he was still. That he was. He was my best friend and it hurts so much, to think I could have done  _ something _ to help him. Hell, that it should have been me instead of him!”

“That’s how I feel about Duncan.” Ah...that made Hue look up slowly, crimson eyes tracing along the human’s profile. That’s right, Hue wasn’t the only one to suffer such loss and he knew how much Alistair regretted not being there. It hadn’t occurred to him that Alistair might also suffer from the guilt, it hadn’t been his fault after all, he couldn’t have controlled what would have happened. Ah. 

“I know.”

“I’m sorry you didn’t have a choice.”

“No, maybe I did. I had the taint, I was going to die. I was scared but it scared me more to think I could turn into one of those things and harm my clan, make them have to put me down. At least with the joining, if I was going to die, I had a choice on how I would. I’m sure if I had asked Duncan at any point to kill me he would have. I just wish I had looked harder, I felt like I didn’t do enough.”

“You did, you have. I think your friend would think the same as well.” Alistair patted his back, forcing a sad chuckle from the elf as he went back to picking at his bread. “And I...shouldn’t have screamed at you. After the fight, I was just scared you were going to die.” Now that he feels emptied out he can think on things with more clarity, that in his shoes he might have done the same thing as Alistair. After all, look how much sorrow he had carried from Tamlen, would he really be willing to put Alistair and even Zevran and the others through the same thing? 

“I can’t promise I won’t fight that hard or try to save people but...I’ll try to be more careful. I’m...sorry for getting mad back.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything less from you. If being reckless was a kingdom, you’d be the king.”

“Would that make you the prince of virginity?”

“You know, I’d tell you to shut up but I...who am I kidding?  _ Shut up _ , there’s nothing wrong with it. I don’t want to jump into it like you do.”

“I’m kidding. Everyone’s got their own pace.”

“And here I thought you said we were best friends. It breaks my heart to think you’d betray me like that Hue. I don’t know if I could even go on.” Alistair’s fake pout just made him roll his eyes, a grin finally on his face. "Or is it because you wish to hear me like you and Zevran force us to? Ah, that's weird. You're making this very weird Hue." The elf scoffed lightly, smacking Alistair on the knee with a laugh.

  
“Just eat your damn cheese, _ lethallin _ .”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lethallin- Casual reference used for someone with whom one is familiar. Friend.


	26. In my sorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Death ends a life, not a relationship” – Mitch Albom

It is a feeling your senses pinpoint; like rain sliding, slithering across every inch of skin. The slow and steady heartbeat pulsing in your ear, hammering louder and louder like a wardrum. Violent rhythm drowning everything out, even your own voice. Every hair on your head stands on end as time flows slower around you, cruel fate making every excruciating moment live in sharpened detail. Red paints the throat, metal glinting in the moonlight as it slides smoothly through flesh as if it were nothing. The horror he feels trapped within his heart’s cage, banging hard against steel but never budging. Never breaking through the disjointed, cruel laugh disguised in his voice.

Black feathers stick to his body, weigh him down until he can barely breathe, barely pick himself up from the ground. Body stiff with tension, as if a mountain is crushing his very soul and he barely has the strength to look up. Eyes meeting familiar ones; they are his but then they are not. Dagger raised above, poised to sink into his flesh, to cut down this drowning man once more. Before he would have allowed it, let the crow-shaped self mark yet another grave. In youth he had fought against it but over the years enough of his body piled along the barren field of his heart; fewer further along as he had stopped trying so hard. After all, what did he have to fight for? 

_Him_. Gasp pushed between cracked lips, hands stained crimson digging through rotten dirt, clawing his body further along. Regret as well as despair had tinted him too dark, barely able to recognise what he had even been before. The crow certainly didn’t care for this self but from its position it did not move, almost curious to see his resolve. Before he’d simply let it happen, let death kill those rising feelings once more and go on with his existence. Now the torn hand reaches out trying to pull the dagger away, muscles straining but he refuses to simply give in. Same yet different eyes bore into his, try to sunder him under cries and screams but he pushes forward. Still too weak, his hand can’t keep the grasp and he yet again finds the dagger tearing through his flesh. Red puddling out underneath as it turns the ground to sludge. Dying again.

Though for once, it didn’t go through his heart.

Eyes flutter open, a hazy stream of sunlight coming in through the flaps and he finds himself alone. Panic sets in first, body jolting up until he hears the familiar grit speaking softly in the distance. Alistair’s voice also filters in and he relaxes, realising Hue has simply woke up and left the tent. Shaking the chills from his spine he rubs the lingering ache from his forehead, laying back down with a groan. His warden waking up before him had never happened before but what’s worse is he couldn’t shake the nerves that crawled underneath his skin. Last night played through his mind; darkspawn attacked the camp and then...Hue’s friend had been one of them, had talked to the warden before turning. Hue, who had curled into a ball on the ground, positioned like he expected death right then and there. 

Zevran’s dagger had taken it out quickly, he had pulled the other up to yell at him but Hue’s hysterics had drawn his anger away. Nothing could have prepared him for that; he lacked any motions or words to calm the other down and resigned himself to being clung to. Despair sat ugly on Hue’s face; dark and messy and heartbreaking as that voice strained itself crying into the night. Words forced out in a fearful tone; the corpse on the ground a friend, a guilt...a regret. _Should have died, should have been me._ A maelstrom started to form at Hue’s words and then the younger man couldn’t catch his breath, falling to the ground as if dead. Death itself was scary, he did not truly want to die yet he knew death could be a quick mercy, a painful silence. 

Watching Hue possibly die is an agony that ravages the bars in his heart; frozen blood and hot tears. Memories blurred together but he brings the younger man to his tent after Wynne confirms he is alive, pulling the other’s armor off and seeing the scar blossomed on his back. It branched and broke out from it’s circular points, where the claws had sunk deeply. Twice, twice this man had made him feel the agonizing burden of almost death. Forehead rests against the scarred back and he breathes out deeply, air shuddering through his lungs, pulled through a tight throat. For once he prays to save a life instead of taking it.

Back to the present, he crumples up the blanket in white knuckles and shoves it in his face, screaming into the thick fabric. In his solitude he drops all of his mask, battered in the storm of his emotions. He shouldn’t care this much, he’s not _equipped_ to care this much. What did he know of actual love other than fancy stories? Love was the product of those who walked in the light, traded and split between clean hands, revered through stories as this grand problem-solver. Love wouldn’t make him this miserable...confused; wouldn’t feel like his heart was about to fall out of his throat. That another could dictate his actions and words, his thoughts, bring fear to him that the Crows could never accomplish. Turning on his side amber eyes spy the dalish gloves amongst his possessions, a weird fluttering feeling in his chest to swirl alongside the darkness. 

_There’s no happily ever after for people like me_. It was a sad truth to ground him back into reality but his eyes never left the embroidered leather, tracing each detail. He is poisoned, spread in a way too unfamiliar to him, he expects to see the gloves gone, stolen from him once more. They never leave, laying in wait for his touch, a reminder that something so fragile is already there and no matter how much he tried to ignore it, it wasn’t going to go away. Enough of this. Sitting up he starts to put on his armor, carefully reconstructing his mask with each layer. Once ready, he steps out into the new day and to find a certain Warden that should be resting at the moment.

_Thwack_. It’s a familiar sound; soft woosh first and then the blunt crunch of metal sinking into wood. A few seconds of silence and it sounds off once more. Following the trail to the tree-line he isn’t surprised to find Hue training with his bow, armor left for a simple set of trousers and a shirt. Focus clear in his reddish eyes, most likely still sore from all the crying he’s done. It’s annoying, he is clearly exhausted on all accounts and should be resting and yet here he is, shooting arrow after arrow into the poor tree. Plenty of words fill Zevran’s mind, plenty want to follow that path onto his tongue but he remains silent. Such conversations felt like they should fall from the more empathic and kind of their group; certainly not him. Instead he wraps his arms around Hue’s waist, burying his nose into the younger elf’s shoulder as Hue pulls the used arrows from the bark.

“Zevran...”, exhaustion laced a rather soft tone but he didn’t push Zevran away, it was almost like Hue was just giving up. That made his nerves itch more, pulling the warden’s back flush to his chest.

“You should be resting, not making enemies of the trees”, he smoothly breathes out into the other’s ear, looking for a reaction, “unless you were waiting for a certain someone to help you.”

“What is that suppose to me---OOF!” Eyes open wide as he easily turns the Warden around, shoving him back against the tree. Confusion glows in those irises, tension making the younger elf stiff as Zevran dives in, capturing his lips in a not so gentle style. Comfort, words, feelings...he can’t sort those out but he can show with his body, swallow the gasps as his tongue slides across. Desperation moves him closer and Hue seems to try to find some purchase, calloused hands grabbing onto what they could.

“Stop….Zevran.” He does what he’s told, lips freeing Hue’s but keeping their position close, amber meeting lidded crimson. “What...what’s gotten into you?”

“More like what’s gotten into you…”

“I’m not joking arou---”

“Neither am I.” Another bruising kiss put an end to that line of thought, trapping the younger elf right up against the tree. Hue’s arms were over his shoulders now, fingers clinging tightly to green-coloured armor as Zevran’s leg ran between the warden’s thighs. Gasps caught in throats, panting into each other’s mouths as he rocked his hips forward. Rutting against each other they tried to lose themselves, to make the world around disappear. Reality could be put on hold when the fantasy offered such a comforting escape. That is until a breath shuddered harshly, looking at green-marked cheeks becoming wet with tears. Hue was desperately trying to hold it in, eyes clenched but it didn’t stop the sobs from flowing. Rough hands wiped away the tears quickly, pretending he hadn’t just started crying once more.

“S-sorry...I’m ruining this…” Hue sobs out, the normal confident voice breaking with such sorrow that it fills him with something strange...pity. Reaching up he uses his thumbs to wipe away those broken tears from rubbed eyes, kissing the warden on the forehead.

“We...didn’t exactly have this kind of training within the Crows. I’m afraid to say I have no skill in comforting someone.” There was a clogged sniff before he felt the elf’s body shake with a chuckle before hearing it.

“Yea, you kinda suck at it…”

“Ah, there he is. I did wonder where you were hiding under all that grief.” He didn’t move much at all, except to remove his thigh from the other. “...You need to talk to me.”

“I...don’t know what else I can say? You heard what I did.”

“You are blaming yourself for a measure of bad fate you and your friend stumbled upon.” Hue scrunched up his nose, seeming to not like that thought but didn’t argue it either. “The mirror was a trap, neither of you knew. It is as simple as that, unfortunate, but simple.”

“I could have done _something_ , looked for him.”

“Yes, and you could have died too. Or become that as well, and I don’t know your...friend but I hardly think he’d be pleased if you did. I certainly don’t like entertaining the idea.”

“What...don’t like jerky?” Zevran blinks then scrunches up his own nose. Great, now he’s not going to be able to look at jerky for a while without thinking about that.

“Mmm. No.” Whatever face he made seemed to amuse Hue though because his shoulders relaxed, leaning more against the tree now. “You seem capable of still making jokes so I trust your mind is more...stable. I suspect you’ve talked to Alistair.”

“Suspect or know?” Zevran lightly shrugs but that didn’t seem to bother the warden one bit. “ I did. We talked...I...I feel pretty stupid, I was so sure you all were going to hate me. You don’t...do you?” Rubbing his arm, without the armor and eyes cast down, Hue looked so much smaller, more vulnerable. As if all Zevran had to do was push lightly and he’d break into pieces. This...this didn’t feel right and certainly wasn’t helping his own mood.

“I don’t. I’d find it rather hard to do many of the things I do with you if I did.” That pulled another soft chuckle from the man, watching as Hue’s rough fingers played with themselves. Silence started to blanket over the scene now, glancing over how tired the Warden looked, yet even in the heavy signs of exhaustion Zevran still wanted to kiss him. From lips that looked a bit bitten from worry to each tear-stained eyelid, as if somehow doing so could make all this heaviness disappear into the air.

“Tamlen would have liked you.” He blinks, realizing what Hue just said and looks curious now.

“Oh? That was his name then?”

“Yea.”

“You knew each other quite well? Were close?”

“Mm. We grew up together, he was my best friend. We became hunters together…”, red eyes looked distant but they looked less dark, each word restoring something back in them, “ Actually took down a bear, we were known for it. Also known for being troublemakers. One time we snuck out of our chores and ventured out of the forest. Furthest we ever got away from the clan since we weren’t allowed on trading runs.”

“Find yourself some fun?” There was a bark of a laugh as Hue finally looked at him, a smile crinkling his eyes at the memory.

“Hardly. Unless you call getting chased by irritated cows fun.” He couldn’t help the laugh that stumbled from his lips, of all the things to run into. “Hey, cows are huge and mean to elf kids! Ever almost get trampled by one?”

“What a mighty warden you are indeed, to face such a deadly foe so young.” Hue blew his bangs up with some irritation. “Was that all you two ventured off for?”

“Huh?”

“Was there not something more to this closeness...and this grief?” He could see the wheels turning in Hue’s head, face morphing from confusion to irritation than surprise as he blinked at Zevran.

“Are you asking if he and I? No, we were like brothers! I mean, I have some experience but that was during one of the gatherings, not with him. We were as close as people could be without being related!” There was a moment when he looked like he’d be scolded but then an indescribable look crossed Hue’s face, studying Zevran. “Wait...are you jealous?”

“I beg your pardon.”

“That’s an incredibly weird thing to get jealous over Zevran…”

“I assure you I am not, I was merely curious since you held him in such high regard.” Hue actually didn’t look convinced and Zevran wanted to argue, it crawled under his skin but he knew as soon as he did he would have lost whatever...this was. “He shaped your grief and regret, why would I not be curious?”

“I...yea, I guess so.”

“Were you not close to others in this clan of yours?” The change of subject seemed to wipe that doubtful look on the younger man’s face, visibly brightening up at the thought of his clan.

“Of course I was. Clan members watch each other’s back. There was Merrill, ah she was the Keeper’s first, and would talk my ear off about history and all that. She would love your stories actually, though I think she talks more than you do! There’s also Fenarel, he was a hunter like me and Tamlen and would join us sometimes though he didn’t like to get into trouble. Ashalle was the one who raised me, she’d probably be wary of you at first but I know she’d like you. There were quite a few in the hunter camp...ah and the Keeper though she’d be a little like Wynne.”

“As in?”

“She’d warn how bad you are for me.” Hue’s grin grew mischievous, peering up at Zevran who started to sport his own smirk. Fingers reached over, slowly pulling on armor to move Zevran in closer and he obliged, leaning into his warden’s shorter frame until lips met once more. Slowly this time, tilting heads to deepen, shaky breath due to pleasure instead of sorrow. Words were no longer needed and now instead of an escape from reality it was a move to ground the other into something more solid. Everything still as entangled as his fingers going through shaggy blonde hair but now it all felt less desperate and more whole.

"...Would it ease your mind if we gave him a burial?" Surprise hadn't only shown up solely on Hue's face, the words falling from the Antivan's lips before any thought was formed. Barely a moment to ponder what he just said before Hue smiles in a way that makes his cage rattle again, leaning to to kiss the assassin with as much adoration he could muster. Something warned him, deep in his gut that he was entering territory so unknown that he might not make it back. His senses tensed but for once in his life he didn't heed that warning voice, pushing forward to lose himself in the other.

  
  
  


“Have a care where your eyes linger Alistair.” Morrigan’s sneer brought him back from his thoughts, realising he had been staring off and unfortunately in her direction of the fireside. Last day to settle here finally and tomorrow they’d be off, preferably towards Denerim, but today Hue had ventured out back to the Dalish camp to receive his new bow and pick up some things. Zevran had, expectedly enough, gone with him though after what they had all seen the other night he could hardly blame the elf. 

“Yes, well, don’t worry. It’s not what you think.” He sneers back and she scoffs at him.

“I see.”

“I was looking at your nose.” This caused the scowl in her face to deepen.

“And what is it about my nose that captivates you?”

“I was just thinking...that it looks _exactly_ like your mother’s!” He dodged the bowl thrown at him, playing innocent at her pursed lips and tightened shoulders.

“I hate you. _So much_!”

“Hmm? What? Why?” He couldn’t help but laugh when she threatened him with another bowl, catching himself on the log as others started to join them.

“I will not be patronized by a man who failed at his religious instruction!”

“I didn’t fail. I was recruited into the Gray Wardens!”

“And if you had not been recruited? What would have happened, instead?”

“I would have turned into a drooling lunatic, slaughtered the grand cleric and run through the streets of Denerim in my small clothes, I guess.” He shrugs, poking at the fire with a stick.

“Your self-awareness does you credit.”

“I thought you’d like that.”

“I’d love to see that myself.” Sibylle sits right next to him, making him stab the fire and drop his stick in surprise as she turned that cat-like grin on him, “You two fight so often it’s rather amusing. Have you always been like this?”

“Yes. She bites my head off every chance she gets.”

“Even if I could indeed bite your head off, I fear I’d only be sinking my teeth into air.”

“Why do you always go on about how stupid I am? I’m not stupid, am I?” He directs that last part at Sibylle, watching as she grins in thought for a moment before gently patting his cheek.

“No. Silly, yes, but not stupid.” He immediately sits up a bit taller, throwing Morrigan a smug smile as she groans in disgust.

“You should not deceive him so lest we suffer his enlarged ego.”

“You’re hurting my manly feelings. All one of them.”

“Then I shall be sure to write you an apology once this is all over.” Before he could rattle off anything more she turned her attention to Sibylle, arms crossed and blatantly ignoring him now. “I have been studying my mother’s grimoire. Do you care to know what it is about?”

“Judging from your expression it must be something truly awful.” A slight chuckle left painted lips but stopped when Morrigan actually seemed nervous for once, fiddling with her fingers as she tilted her head towards her tent further away. Sibylle seemed to take the hint, standing up quietly to follow the other mage but her hand lingered on Alistair’s cheek, giving him a smile and gentle pat before walking off. His eyes followed her movement, leaning his elbows on his knees as a sigh left his lips. Maker, he could stare at her all day. A soft chuckle pulled his attention away, eyes landing on Wynne who was grinning over at him.

“Why are you smiling like that?” Narrowing his eyes only seemed to make her smile more. “You look suspiciously like the cat who swallowed the pigeon.”

“Canary.”

“What?”

“I look like the cat that swallowed the canary.”

“I once had a very large cat”, sitting up he shakes his head, “but that’s not my point. My point is why are you smirking?” Another chuckle spilled from her lips.

“You were watching her. With great interest, I might add. In fact, I believe you were...enraptured.” The heat that swam through his cheeks blazed through, making him sit up taller as he cleared his throat, trying to will his expression into something stern.

“I...look to her for guidance.”

“Oh I see. So what guidance did you find in those swaying hips hmm?” That blew the air out of his sails, waving his hands in front of him as his cheeks glowed.

“No no, I wasn’t looking at...you know her...hind-quarters!”

“Certainly.”

“I gazed...glanced, in that direction, maybe, but I wasn’t staring...or really seeing anything even!”

“Of course.”

“I hate you. You’re a bad person.” Lips pouting only made her chuckle harder, his eyes looking away as arms crossed.

“It just seems you and her are inseparable these days. Joined at the hip, almost.”

“That’s a bit of an overstatement, don’t you think?” He scoffed, still slightly pouting but he was looking at her at least.

“Well then, now that you’re in an intimate relationship, you should learn about where babies really come from.” Turning her body to face him, her smile motherly as she leaned in as if teaching a young child. He blinked, dropping his arms.

“Uh, pardon?”

“I know the Chantry says you dream about babies and the good Fade spirits take them out of the Fade and leave them in your arms...but that’s not true. Actually what happens is that when a girl and a boy really love each other---”

“Andraste’s flaming sword! I know where babies come from!” Hands to his ears, his voice pitches up as he feels heat go from his forehead down to his neck. Surely his face must be as red as he feels.

“Do you? Do you really?”

“I certainly hope so!” Voice cracking, he fails to hear the footsteps behind him until a lilted voice carries over.

“Oh? That’s good to know.” Whipping around he sees Sibylle with a grin on her face, causing an almost ungodly sound to erupt from his throat. Stammering breath, he’s up on his feet and waving a finger at Wynne who is keeping a surprisingly calm face.

“You did that on purpose!”

“Now, now Alistair, why would I do such a thing?”

“Because you’re wicked. That frail old lady act? I’m so not fooled. I’m on to you now.” His lips purse once more, blush running down to his neck as both ladies laughed. Really, it was already horrible enough having someone who could be his grandmother say such things but to do so right in front of Sibylle. It felt like a double hit and he wanted to bury himself in his tent for the rest of the day, until he felt a hand slide into his. Blinking, he looked over as Sibylle had slid up beside him, holding his hand and the other wrapped around his arm, pressing it against her... _ah_. Oh, he felt himself blush for an entirely different reason and cleared his throat, trying hard not to grin like a total idiot.

“It seems Morrigan has a favour to ask though I think she’s going to ask it of Hue instead.” He could see her grin slightly grow as his expression fell.

“Oh, so this is why you are buttering me up?”

“Am I? I am merely holding your arm. How would one think of this as buttering you up?” His face grows more red as she presses closer, eyes looking up to the sky and praying for a cool temperature to tamper off the heat in him. “Is it something you cannot say?”

“You’re evil.”

“Possibly.” Peeking over at her she shoots him a grin before finally releasing his arm, disappointment fills his chest at losing that contact. “Aside from that I assume you’ve already spoken to Hue.”

"This morning, yes. Though I imagine Zevran probably had more of an effect on him than my words.

"Nonsense, it's clear he respects you. You've no need to get jealous." He opens his mouth to argue but stops, not sure if he even could. Hue and him were closer, probably more than anyone here and he guessed he would sort of feel jealous if he took Zevran's word over Alistair's. Maybe. A little. Okay, this was feeling a bit silly, time to change the subject.

“So what possible favour could our witch want?” 

“Hmmm. I think that’s best left for her to explain. Even if she does ask Hue I’m sure most of us will be involved somehow.” Sitting down on the log he had abandoned she fixes her robe, patting next to her for him to sit down. Which he did, almost mechanically, and decided to ignore the knowing smirk that Wynne was passing over to him.

“I can hardly wait.” Blessedly the older mage had gotten up to tend to her own things, giving them a motherly warning to play nice before heading off to her tent. “Speaking of favours…”

“Uh-oh.”

“What do you mean uh-oh? What does uh oh mean?” He lets out a long sigh and she chuckles, patting his leg. Her hair gently falling to the side as she looks over to him, smirk playing upon her lips.

“I’m kidding, what is it you want to ask?”

“Well, now I don’t know if I want to.”

“Alistair…”, she drags out his name in that lovely voice, making him weak in an instance. She really has no idea what she does to him, does she? Or maybe she does and plans to keep doing it. He doesn’t seem to mind either way if he thinks about it.

“Well, chances are we’ll be heading to Denerim soon, and when we’re there I wonder if we might be able to...look someone up.” Blue eyes study him, piercing into his own that makes his cheeks want to light up.

“This wouldn’t be a former lover of yours, would it?” He blinks, twice. “How awfully daring of you to take the woman you’ve currently confessed to to see an ex of yours. Was jealousy your plan?”

“A former what?! No! Do you honestly think I would suggest we go see...together? No!” Sputtering out his words, he flails his hands in an attempt to deny any of what she said. “Besides I’ve never...had one before! You’re the first person I’ve ever confessed to!” Now she looked a bit shocked.

“Really? Interesting. Then who is it you wish to see?”

“I have a sister. A half-sister. I told you about my mother, right? She was a servant at Redcliffe Castle, and she had a daughter...only I never knew about her.” His fingers fiddle together in his lap, elbows on his knees as he stares into the fire. “I don’t think she knew about me, either. They kept my birth a secret, after all. But after I became a Gray Warden I did some checking and...well, I found out she’s still alive. In Denerim.”

“I see.”

“She’s the only real family I have left, the only family not also mixed up in the whole royal thing. I’ve just been thinking that...maybe it’s time I went to see her. With the Blight coming and everything, I don’t know if I’ll ever get another chance to see her. Maybe I can help her, warn her about the danger, I don’t know.” The silence overtakes them, only the crackling of fire filling the space and he’s almost afraid to look anywhere but the flames until he sees a hand covering his, clenching it gently with long, slender fingers.

“That’s fine. We could try. I’m sure the rest of the group wouldn’t mind either.”

“I’d appreciate that. If something were to happen to her and I never went to at least see her. I don’t know if I could forgive myself.” He covered the hand holding his with his other, gently squeezing it as brown eyes smiled at her. “What about you?”

“Me?”

“Isn’t there any family you wish to see? That you couldn’t because...uh…” His words falter as her expression darkens, smile dropped. Rage seemed to swirl in her eyes, like a fire ready to burst but then she forms her cold mask, icy smile making him shiver.

“Mages don’t have families.”

“Sibylle…” She takes back her hand, waving him off with such a fake expression it only makes him worry more. “What happened?”

“Nothing happened, Alistair. I simply don’t have a family. No need to pity me over it either, I have long since stopped caring.” That seemed like a lie, otherwise she wouldn’t have looked like she was ready to burn the whole forest down in that rare moment. What could have possibly happened to bring her such anger? Reaching out he gently takes her hand again, giving it another squeeze.

“You can tell me when you’re ready. I just want you to know you don’t have to carry it all on your own, not anymore.” Her lips part to speak, probably to argue but then close tight as she looks him over. He’s not sure what she’s seeing in him but her shoulders relax, at least, and she leans into him, head on his shoulder. Warmth seeps through, pressing into him like he’s what’s keeping her grounded and he lets her. Feels how her fingers intertwined with his, the softness of her hair tickling his neck and chin. Wonders who else has seen her like this, if anyone else has but basks in the thought that she trusts him to be this open. They stay like this until the two elves return and hear what Morrigan’s favour was, in what would lead to a whole new set of complications.

  
  
  
  
  


Staring at the golden armor across from the fire, she watches the tense back as his scrunched up gaze bores into every last detail on the chest piece. There were too many feelings etched out on his face, a complicated look as he sat still as a statue. Everyone else had given him space, lingering in other parts of the camp when he asked to be alone but she hadn’t quite moved away. Before all this...feelings, she would have been one of the first to leave the man alone, knowing full well how to stew in one’s own thoughts. Now there was a pull, coaxing her to be by his side and soften the rigidness of that back. What words could she say though? 

It had started with Morrigan’s favour to go and take care of Flemeth, an odd request of the Wardens to take out her own mother. Or it would have been if not for the fact that Flemeth has been living forever as a legend by stealing the bodies of her “daughters” when they were ready. A fate that would soon be on Morrigan as well if something was not done. Hue had agreed to help her, to confront Flemeth for her and the witch’s face had softened, probably unknowing to her. Even if she wouldn’t admit it, there was a lot of trust between the elven warden and Morrigan. The only problem was getting to Flemeth meant heading back through Ostagar, a thought that had made Hue, Alistair, and even Wynne tense up. 

Seeing it for herself made her realise why; corpses both human and darkspawn laid strewn about the diseased battlefield. Blood staining the now frost-covered ground and with the crunch of their boots on the fresh snow brought even more hidden darkspawn upon their weapons. The once proud ruins held a desolation over them, lost to the Blight’s touch and they shifted through the disheveled, snow-covered camp to find the key they were told about. A key hidden by an old retainer of the King’s that they had luckily stumbled upon being chased down by soldiers before entering the Wilds. Within the chest it opened sat Maric’s sword, held in shaky hands by Alistair who couldn’t believe what they’d found.

Sadly any hope or happiness they had felt from that prize was quickly snuffed out for when they crossed the bridge a truly horrific sight had greeted them. Cailan, naked except for his smallclothes, beaten and bruised and dead, crucified unceremoniously upon a wooden post in the middle of the bridge. The cold had certainly set in, pale skin an almost bluish tint, but the shaky breath next to her drew her eyes away. Alistair stood there, wide-eyed with shock, shoulders shaking a bit as he probably reeled from the sight. That’s when rage overtook surprise, brows drawn down as he marched across the rest of the bridge. Between the group no darkspawn stood a chance, not even an Ogre and plowing through hordes of them had Hue finding the pieces of Cailan’s golden armor, scattered amongst the horde leaders. Once they had cleared out every last blighted creature the two Wardens had set to work pulling Cailan’s body down, Alistair asking for her help in lighting a pyre.

Words hadn’t been spoken as the body burned, Alistair’s eyes never leaving the fire until it was turned to ash. Setting up camp there had been some instances of condolence from Hue and Wynne but none could pierce the silent wall the warden had put up for himself. Truly she would have heeded his words as well, left him to it, but the wrongness tainted her tongue and soon she found herself sitting next to him with a bottle of wine.

“You will burn a hole through it if you stare long enough.” Even her teasing didn’t seem to budge him, his head barely turning to acknowledge her. “Were you two close?”

“No.” Finally a response, a sigh leaving his lips as she opened the bottle. “I don’t think he cared much about my existence. I didn’t mean anything to him. We never spoke. Well, maybe once. Maric and Cailan had come to Redcliffe to visit the arl. I was very young then. We were introduced. I believe I said, “Greetings, your Highness.” He said, “Ooh! Swords!” and ran off to the armory. That was the extent of our relationship. We drifted apart after that. Very sad.” Pushing the open bottle to his face, she saw him blink before looking over to her, eyes clearly on the verge of some tears but from what feeling she didn’t know.

“Drink. At times like these it helps.” He hesitates, looking from the end of the bottle to her before finally taking it, drinking a bit of it. “You deserved more than an absent father and an uncaring brother. I don’t understand how you can look as if you’re about to cry over someone who chose to ignore your existence.”

“I mean, deep down, he was still my brother. What the darkspawn did to him wasn’t right.” Handing the bottle back to her he runs his fingers over the etched out pattern of a dragon in the golden metal. She throws back her head, taking a longer swig of the bottle as he looks on in surprise, licking her lips of any stray drops.

“True, it wasn’t. However I would not beat yourself up over someone who wouldn’t shed a tear at your departure.”

“You didn’t even know him.”

“Didn’t I? I don’t think I ever had to talk to him to see what he’s done to you.” Another swig, the tangy flavour tingling down her throat as she starts to gain more honesty. “It sits plain in your face, in your words what your so-called family has done to you Alistair and frankly, I do not like it one bit.” 

“Oh…”

“You are far more forgiving than I could ever be.” It spills from her lips before she can stop it, realising the implication certainly wouldn’t be lost between them. “I mean, you are rather sympathetic to a fault, though I suppose most wouldn’t find it as such.” His eyes are on her now, watching her with drawn brows and curiosity. Shit, she has said far too much and she wasn’t even close to feeling a buzz. Certainly it wasn’t the wine doing this to her, so that left Alistair himself as the one that made her speak so openly.

“Maybe, I just can’t help but feel bad about it.” Another sigh from his lips and she hands him the bottle, her own eyes tracing the armor now. Thoughts spilling from her mouth before she can stop them.

“You should wear this.” He chokes, sputtering up a bit of wine as he looks to her, like she had just said she had two heads. “Why are you surprised?”

“I’m not...this was Cailan’s armor. I haven’t done anything worthy of wearing this.” Now that made her huff, taking the bottle away from him as she looks him dead in the eyes.

“You’ve done more than enough! Alistair, whether you wish to admit it, you are as much a prince as Cailan was and have as much right to the name. I dare say you’ve done more for the people in Ferelden already and I know you will do so much more!” Setting the bottle down she grabs his face between her hands, making him stare dead-on to her. “You **are** worthy. You were his brother and Maric’s son, maybe in blood and name only, but it is still your right. Believe me. Never let anyone make you feel that you don’t deserve anything.” Unblinking, he stares at her in awe and she wills away the blush that threatened to form on her cheeks, pushing down the urge to kiss him. Hands reached up to cover hers, leaning into her touch as his eyes clenched shut. She feels the shudder before it flows from his tongue.

“Thank you.” Words shuddered through the air, leaning more in until his forehead laid against her shoulder. Hands moved from his face to around his shoulders, holding him gently as he sank further into her. Once before in Orzammar he had held her, let her bury her weakness inside his warmth and tonight she does the same for him. It burns through her, this anger that so many have beaten this man down that he constantly questions his own worth. That he makes self-deprecation part of his language in the form of jokes and sarcasm, to hide his own doubts. Where she took the path of rage and apathy, he chose to still be kind and feelings of protectiveness washed over her. Shoulders tight, she can tell he’s trying to hold it in but she kisses his forehead, reassurance in soft words upon his ear and he lets it out. None of this was easy for him, for any of them, but he was trying. Maker, was he trying his best and she knew it. Tear-stained clothes would dry, feelings would grow stronger, and by the morning they’d be ready to face Flemeth head on. Tonight she’d let him lean on her as much as he needed, for he needed her and that was awakening far more in her than she ever imagined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long, I've had a bad couple of weeks but now I'm back on track. Grief and healing is the name of the game here. I wanted to write in a way where it wasn't just brought up and then suddenly everything is okay because that's stuff you have to work through.

**Author's Note:**

> If you know me from twitch or twitter, then you know this was bound to happen. If not, then Hi, I'm Tabikat, I run the Kinkquisition streams and I'm a really HUGE Dragon Age nerd. This spawned from jokes and stories from my streams and also writing down a bunch of ideas until I just decided to type them all up. I'll be going from Origins all the way into Inquisition (though each game will have their own fic). This is a retelling of sorts so some dialogue will be similar to the game, especially at the start, but then will start to branch off in many places. I wanted to make a fic that could be read by both fans and people who have never played Dragon Age.
> 
> If you like what I do, I talk more about Dragon age on my twitter https://twitter.com/TabiKato and twitch https://www.twitch.tv/tabikato .


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